Tidings of Comfort

"At the time I met Susan, I was with my fiancée, Linda. She and I had been 'swinging' for a couple of years and honestly, I liked watching her getting it on with other guys. And women. Our agreement was, at the end of the night, we went home together. At that particular party, there was a guy named Larry who had what I'd call a pop-can dick... about two-and-a-half thick and about ten long. Linda couldn't get enough of it. He wasn't just ringing her chimes, he was shaking the whole bell tower. And I was mostly sitting it out, watching and playing with myself a bit.

"Susan noticed and came over and sat down next to me. 'Yours?' she asked, indicating Linda. 'Sort of,' I told her. 'Fiancée.'

"'Oh,' she nodded then paused to watch them for a bit. After awhile, she turned back to me. 'You know, that's not a shabby quim-stick you've got there.'

"'Quim-stick?' Okay, so I was surprised. I don't think I'd heard that one before. 'Yes, you know...' she answered. 'Your tonsil tickler, hog leg, honker, donkey dick, kidney cracker... your cock. You've got a pretty nice one. And your hands look good, too. Not all beat up and calloused.'

"'Thanks,' I told her. 'You're pretty damned attractive yourself.' She smiled and my attention was definitely getting drawn away from the Linda and Larry Show. 'You seem to handle yourself pretty well,' she went on. 'How do you handle pussy?' I thought I was better than adequate and told her so.

"'Shall we go find out?' she asked, nodding towards the stairway to the upstairs bedrooms. It was pretty obvious to me that Linda wasn't going to miss me, so I thought sure... why not? I stood and offered my arm. She stood, smiled and took it. We headed off to our rendezvous with Fate."

"It turned out," Susan decided to jump in, "that he was excellent with his hands, mouth and eventually cock. I don't think he had quit in his vocabulary. I swear, I got off a dozen times, hard, without even fucking. There were another couple from the fucking, but he didn't last terribly long. Poor guy had been all dressed up and nowhere to go all evening.

"In any case, I made damned sure to get his phone number before we all went our separate ways. I was pretty sure I wasn't going to beat fiancée, but I was hoping to see him around again."

"It turned out," I resumed, "Linda was very enamored of Larry and his prodigious battering ram, and she'd procured his phone number before we left. She informed me the next day that she was having cold feet about the whole getting married thing. By mutual agreement, we called it off. Within a week, she was living with Larry. I on the other hand felt let down and horny. Let down because she'd gone with the humongous cock and horny because I wasn't getting any. That's when I found Susan's number in my pants pocket, when I went to do laundry. The rest, as they say, is history."

"Sort of," Susan corrected me. "We did start dating and went to swing parties together a lot. We did share in groups and even one-on-ones with others, but we always ended up together at the end of the night. And whatever we'd done, it just livened up our fucking later, when we told each other about our exploits. We also found out over the next year or so just how much we had in common and developed a true respect for each other, outside of the sex.

"The thing was, for us to get our desires met and be a couple, we had to develop a very strong trust in each other and a dedication to putting the other person first, especially if there was something uncomfortable about the situation. And that's why jealousy doesn't enter into our relationships... not with each other and not with anyone else. We will always be each other's Number One, and everybody else comes in second. That's how I can fuck Andy, who is probably the closest friend Rick has, and have Rick not worry about it."

"Sounds like you have something pretty amazing," Melissa told us. "I don't think any of the guys I've dated could be trusting enough, or confident enough, or whatever, to not go all Neanderthal if I showed interest in someone else. Present company excepted... this is the first 'date' I've had with Andy where sex was involved, so the jury is still out on that one."

"I think Rick's point about ownership is a big one," Andy chimed in. "I don't feel like I own you. Or that anyone else does, either. I think my choices are: feel good when I'm with you, or if I don't, then move on. I don't think there's any control involved."

"And that, good sir, puts you at the head of the class," Melissa turned and smiled to him. "I took the chance on coming up here, after hearing the softcore version of the stories, because you seemed like a mellow enough guy to accept who I am and to have a good time. I'm glad I did. And speaking of good times, is this kind of Christmas get-together traditional? I mean, Andy indicated the Thanksgiving weekend was pretty usual... that you'd been doing it for a while."

"Thanksgiving has become traditional," Susan told her. "After we inherited the house and fixed it up to live here year-round, we invited Andy -- then between female companions -- to join us. He comes up, has dinner with us, helps load up wood for the winter and gets time to chill out, away from the city.

"Christmas is new this year. Rick and I have a little tradition we've started where we go to Maggie's Roadhouse for Christmas Eve dinner and dancing, and get a chance to catch up with some of our friends and neighbors before coming back here. This will be the first time we've had guests with us."

"Sounds like a couple of very nice traditions," Melissa told us. "I hope Maggie's is casual, because I didn't bring much in the way of partying clothes."

"Would you consider plaid flannel shirts and denim jeans to be casual?" Susan asked. "Because that's what most of the patrons... male and female... wear in the winter."

"I didn't come that casually prepared," Melissa smiled. "I can do a cotton blouse and jeans, though."

"You'll fit right in," I told her. "We usually go down between seven and eight... there's still a lot of the buffet left and the dinner crowd has mostly moved on. The people there will be the younger ones intending to party and celebrate Christmas early. There's usually three couples and a smattering of singles that we have as friends and they often show up around then."

"Have you had sex with any of these friends?" Melissa asked. I suppose it was just an extension of her curiosity.

"Yes," Susan told her. "Two of the couples and two of the single girls and one of the single guys have been part of our swingers adventures. These days, we only see them around the holidays... we've all kind of gone different directions from before. But we are very comfortable with them and with their discretion. They're good people to be around."

"This definitely sounds like fun," Melissa decided.

"I think it will be," Susan agreed. "And on that note, I'm throwing together some finger sandwiches and cider for a light lunch. Better not to be stuffed when we descend on Maggie's excellent buffet."

Susan provided lunch and wrapping materials, and we took some time to wrap presents and put them under our tree. We already had a small collection from various relatives that was what Susan and I opened on our Christmas morning. This year, adding Andy's and Melissa's contribution, it looked much more impressive. I was really starting to like this gathering and was already starting to think in terms of 'next year'...

The time came to head on down to Maggie's, so we rotated through the showers -- adding in-line water heaters now seemed like it had been a very good idea -- and getting dressed in party casuals. Melissa's version of a cotton blouse and jeans sent Susan back to her wardrobe to get a more sprayed on look. Together, they were awesome and I was chubbing up. I'm pretty sure Andy was, too.

Susan made sure she had our present for Maggie... another tradition for a solid friendship... and we all piled into my truck for the ten minute drive. When we got there, the parking lot was plowed and only half full, which meant our estimate of when the dinner crowd would leave was accurate. The roadhouse itself was a long, low building with a restaurant and bar dominating most of it. There was a second story over the kitchens at one end which is where Maggie lived. For tonight's revelry, the dining room had the buffet along one wall and a Christmas tree decked out on the opposite wall.

Through the door to the bar we could see a band setting up, and walking up to greet us was Maggie herself. It seems strange to admit to having the hots for a voluptuous, platinum haired, blue eyed 55-year-old, but hey... she was that friendly and that attractive. She was also the owner.

"Susan!" she called out as she saw us enter and headed our way. "Rick! Welcome, welcome, welcome... and a Merry Christmas!" She slowed up as she reached us, eyeing Andy and Melissa. "And welcome to you, too!" she smiled. "I don't think I know you."

"Maggie, I'd like you to meet Andy Fowler, my Best Man, and his lady Melissa Minette," I jumped in. "They're spending the Christmas holiday with us this year. Andy... Melissa... I'd like you to meet Maggie Morgan, owner of this dive of depravity and an incredible host, and friend."

"Hmmph! Dive..." she muttered as she moved up to me. She looked over my head for a moment then launched herself into a hug and a kiss. A major hug and kiss... and damn! she felt good. Susan started laughing as I got smothered. Maggie finally broke the grope and turned to Susan.

"Depraved, maybe..." she told her, "but it ain't a dive!" Then she pulled Susan to her and into a rather bawdy clinch. Andy nudged me with an elbow and looked up. I knew what I was going to see before I looked. The whole rafter was decked out with mistletoe.

"Merry Christmas, sweetheart," she told Susan as they broke the hug and kiss. "We've still got a lot of food and Retro's playin' tonight. I think Ted and Julie and Krystal are in the bar. So help yerselves... tonight's on me!"

"Seriously?" Andy asked, obviously surprised. "I mean, free food and drink and music and all? Wow!... Thank you!" Maggie turned to look at him for a moment.

"C'mere, honey," she beckoned him and a somewhat hesitant Andy moved on over to her. She put her arms up over his neck and pulled him down into a kiss. I'm not sure she was pulling out all the stops, but she sure had him squirming and pretty well buried in her chest. When she let him up, she grinned and told him, "when I say Merry Christmas, darlin', I mean it!" Andy was panting and adjusting himself. Maggie in the meantime turned to Melissa.

The two locked eyes for a moment before Melissa exclaimed, "oh, Hell, yeah!" and moved in for the hug and kiss. And I knew both of them were pulling out all the stops! I'm surprised there wasn't a small nuclear meltdown right there in the foyer. When they let up, Maggie leaned back grinning and told Melissa, "and a very Merry Christmas to you, too, you lovely wench!"

Melissa didn't say anything. She didn't have to... her lighthouse smile was saying it all.

"When you're done devouring the guests, Maggie," Susan piped up, "maybe we can go devour some of your famous buffet."

"You bet!" Maggie kept smiling. "I gotta check on the kitchen, but I'll catch up with y'all, later."

Susan snagged Melissa's arm. "C'mon," she told her. "Let's get to the food before the guys do and it's all gone." She steered Melissa towards the buffet line while Andy and I just looked at each other, shrugged and followed along.

Maggie had lived all over the country and her buffet showed it. From Tex-Mex beef and beans to New England seafood, from Whitetail backstraps to Navajo atoo', and just about everything in-between. There was still quite a lot available even though the dinner rush was over.

Personally, I went the 'little bit of everything' route... some clam chowder, corn bread and butter, venison strips, some of the Navajo mutton strew, some red beans and rice... basically everything except the liver and onions. That's one I had zero interest in. I'll blame in on childhood trauma.

Susan did basically the same thing except heavier on the fruits and veggies -- she preferred the asparagus tips and escalloped apples, for example -- and lighter on the meats. Andy pretty much did like I did and Melissa mimicked Susan. Maybe it was just a guy vs. girl thing... I don't know. I do know it was excellent. Maggie never disappointed, holiday or not.

We got drinks and grabbed a table in the corner of the dining room where we had a nice view of Maggie's big, bright Christmas tree and out the window to the snow covered back lot. We spent most of dinner conversation filling in Melissa, and Andy to some degree, on the history of the roadhouse and some of the people in the area. It was mostly rural and largely farms and vacation homes, with families that had been in the area for generations.

Melissa asked, tactfully, if there was anything between me and Susan and Maggie, and the answer was no, just very good friends. Maggie had never been part of our group extracurricular activities, though she sure seemed friendly enough. Melissa also wanted to know some more about our friends that we would probably run into. Susan gave her a general rundown.

"Ted and Julie Harris are long time swinging friends, older than us by a bit and fairly well established. They own one of the larger horse ranches in the area and are incredibly considerate and supportive. What they do on their own time is nobody's business but theirs, and anyone directly involved. You'll find most people around here keep their noses to themselves unless invited.

"Ted is pretty handsome, athletic... has a nice cock and knows how to use it, along with his mouth and hands, and has a God-awful amount of stamina. Julie's about my height and trim, with B-cup boobies on a good day, but she's way multiorgasmic and loves giving and getting oral.

"Mike and Linda Frost are the other couple we have history with and consider good friends. Mike's a mechanic at the truck stop and Linda is a secretary for a law firm. Mike's a little shorter but a nice build, and about average for cock size, although he's pretty thick. Linda's a little shit blonde bombshell, bright blue eyes, nice bust and gives amazing head. Almost as good as Krystie...

"That's Krystal Bell, one of the solos and a fellow artist, like me. Natural redhead, stacked and a lot of fun. The other solo woman is Marianne Cooper. She's the oldest of the group at 45, and stands out because of her silvery grey hair and golden eyes. She's a 'domestic engineer' for Old Man Riley, who's got one of the larger farm complexes in the area. She's kind of like a housekeeper and nanny rolled together. Oh, and she loves getting DP'ed.

"There's others that we sometimes see here that we don't have a physical history with, and if we run into them, we'll introduce you."

"What about Steve?" I asked her. "He usually makes it for Christmas."

"Oh, yeah... Steve..." Susan echoed in a sort of far-off dreamy way.

"That's an interesting reaction," Melissa observed. "Someone special?"

"I hope you're not racially prejudiced," Susan told her, coming back to earth. "Steve is one of the nicest, gentlemanly, loyal men I've known, and he happens to be black. He also has a cock that hangs halfway to his knees, and trust me, it's a religious experience."

Melissa smiled slightly, with a raised eyebrow at the 'religious experience' comment.

"I tend to take people as individuals," she told Susan. "I don't really care about somebody's color, or sex, or who they pray to... I care about what they do... their behavior. If he's a gentleman like you say, we'll probably get along."

As Melissa was talking, I noticed Mike and Linda coming in and getting a Maggie Greeting under the mistletoe. The two of them still looked awesome and Linda was definitely dressed for the hunt. I rose slightly, to wave and try to catch their eye, but I needn't have bothered. Maggie brought them right over. Once she was done with the hugs and kisses.

"Mike!" I greeted him as they got to the table, and this time I did rise to my feet. "Linda! Awesome to see you!" I think Andy was quickly figuring out the protocol because he got to his feet, too.

"Now you make sure they get something to eat!" Maggie admonished me as I held out my hand to Mike.

"Absolutely!" I told her as Mike and I shook hands, then did the Manly Hug thing. I decided on introductions before I moved on to Linda.

"Mike, Linda... I'd like you to meet a couple of friends of ours, staying with us for Christmas. This is Andy Fowler of the Andy-my-cubemate fame, and his lady Melissa Minette, a recent addition to our circle of friends..." I turned to give Linda a hug -- and she initiated the kiss -- before I went on, "Andy, Melissa, these are Mike and Linda Frost, very close friends of ours. Mike's a mechanical wizard and Linda works at a law firm, like you do, Melissa. We've known each other for a lot of years."

"Oh, screw..." Susan muttered as she got up and moved around to where she could welcome Mike with a hug and a rather intense kiss, and then move to Linda and do the same. Of course, when Susan stood up, Melissa did, too, following her lead.

When Susan was done with Mike and moving to Linda, Andy stepped in and offered his hand to Mike, who took it and they exchanged greetings. When my wife finished with Linda and moved out of the way, Linda didn't hesitated to pull Andy to her and give him the same 'welcome' we were all sharing. Leaving Melissa to move to Mike, of course, with somewhat predictable results. Melissa was breathing hard when Linda pulled her in.

By the time Melissa and Linda got done 'welcoming' each other, I figured they were going to say, "bye, guys... see you later," and head off to find a room somewhere. I'd been a bit concerned about things being awkward, but I sure wasn't anymore.

"How about you guys fill plates and join us?" I asked. "There's plenty of room."

"Anybody else here, yet?" Mike asked as they turned for the buffet.

"Maggie said she thought Ted and Julie and Krystal were in the bar already," I told him. "Haven't seen them, or any of the others."

"Okay. Be right back." He and Linda hit the buffet and returned, grabbing a couple of empty seats.

To Andy's and Melissa's surprise, I think, dinner conversation was mostly mundane... who had been doing what (rather than whom), what was going on with our families, what we were looking forward to in the future and so forth. Mike and Linda were about to pull the trigger on buying a motorhome so they could vacation around the country on their own schedule and more specifically to visit some of the adult recreation spots in Florida, along with friends who lived there.

I'd never been in one of the Class A motorhomes, much less toured the country in it, and I commented as such. That got me and Susan a casual invite to go vacationing with them some time. While we were talking about vacationing around the country, Marianne came in and was greeted by Maggie. Susan noticed her first.

"Ah, the Grey Lady of the Wood has arrived," she commented to me.

"Excellent," I nodded, knowing Maggie would bring her our direction.

"Who?" Melissa asked. She'd caught part of what Susan had said.

"The tallish woman with Maggie, with the silver hair," I explained. "Marianne Cooper, another of our friends. And a Tolkien freak. Or, I suppose I should say aficionado. She's a librarian and splits her time between the village and the high school."

"And she's one of your lovers?"

"Yes... and obviously a great deal of discretion is warranted. In fact, she's the one that introduced me and Susan to a number of our swinging friends in this area. She lives in a ranchette about a mile farther up the road from us, with her garden and a bunch of animals. She's sort of a Hippie Nature Chick, but toned down."