Time Flies Ch. 01

"Let's put on Officer-cams." I told Teresa, even though we were in civilian clothes. We did so, along with our armored vests, then went through the crowd to the small congregation of Police Officers.

"What's going on?" I asked as I came up. Officers were surrounding a black man in his 30s, with old tennis shoes, ragged blue jeans with some tears, a black sweatshirt and a gray pullover hoodie sweater. He had a thin, trimmed beard and his hair was cut close, but not to the point of fuzz or baldness. His hands were cuffed behind his back.

Sr. Patrolman Johnson said "We responded to a disorderly conduct call. This guy was panhandling people coming out of the restaurant, then yelling at them for not giving him enough money. When we arrived, he began yelling at us, calling us 'Pigs' and 'Crackers', and saying the Police beat up blacks for the fun of it, stuff like that." The other Officers on the scene nodded vigorously in agreement.

"He refused to show ID, sir." said Corporal Ronnie Kirkpatrick. "Two Officers drew weapons, but kept them pointed at the ground. We made him put his hands on this Patrol car and we frisked him. No weapons, but no ID, either. Then he started yelling at us some more, and even lunged at us a couple of times."

"That's right!" yelled the black man as I went up to him. "And you're just a redheaded cracker that beats up black people with that crowbar! Yeah, YOU, Iron Crowbar! Yeah, I know who you are! You're the father of that halfbreed child!"

Officers looked on in anger, and I saw the people in the crowd recording this. "Okay, guys, start moving this crowd back." I said. Officers moved to implement my instructions.

Then I said to the man, and loud enough for everyone to hear: "Well! Since you know who I am, let me return the favor. Guys, this is Jackson Ripley, hired by the District Attorney as an Investigator. And he is insulting our intelligence with his obvious attempts to goad us into physical indiscretions."

The man instantly shut up, a pained look on his face as he realized I knew who he was. He said "Well, since you know, either let me go or call the D.A."

"You wish." I said. "Johnson, Burrell, take this perp to Police Headquarters and run him through full booking. The charges are panhandling, disorderly conduct, felony verbally and physically assaulting Police Officers, felony resisting arrest, and FFI. Make sure he is not physically harmed in any way. And do not permit him to make a phone call until I get there. I'll handle that myself."

After Ripley was taken away, I said "Kirkpatrick, you need to collect the Officer-cam and dash-cam videos of everyone here, and get every last bit of it into evidence servers. Including mine. And see if you can get some of these Citizens to share with us what they recorded, though they can't be forced to and likely won't. Go ahead." Corporal Kirkpatrick moved out smartly to complete that mission.

Teresa and I got back into my Police SUV and drove towards Headquarters. She said "What are you going to do? Call Miriam Walters?"

"HELL, no." I said emphatically. "But I am going to call the Chief and the Sheriff. And you better wrap up warm... there is definitely an east wind coming..."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

7:00am, Saturday, January 4th. I was in the Chief's office. He and the Sheriff had come in the night before, after my phone calls to them, and we reviewed the Officer-cam and dash-cam data. The Sheriff was eventually persuaded to go back home to get some sleep.

Jackson Ripley was booked and put in a holding cell. He kept demanding to be allowed to call a lawyer, and was told he could call one in the morning. He demanded to be allowed his phone call immediately, and we (correctly) told him that the Right to a Phone Call was a figment of Hollywood's fertile imagination, and he'd be sitting overnight in his holding cell.

"I will say this." said the Chief as we drank coffee. "The Officers conducted themselves very well, very professionally throughout that altercation. The attempts to goad them into an escalation did not work."

"Commander Croyle and the Precinct Leadership are the reason for that." I said. "I'll pass along your compliments through them to everyone."

Just then the Duty Desk buzzed the Chief. "Ah yes, we've been expecting her. Escort her to my office." After hanging up, the Chief said "D.A. Walters has arriiiiiived."

A moment later, District Attorney Miriam Walters came storming in. "What the hell is going on here?" she demanded to know.

"Hello to you, tooooo." said the Chief icily. If Walters had any sense of observation and deduction, she would've seen that the Chief was as angry as I was, and perhaps more.

"Where is my Investigator?!" Walters all but yelled.

"In a holding cell." I said.

"Release him. Now." said Walters.

"No." said the Chief. "He endangered my Police Officers. He is going to be fully charged and bound over for trial."

"Which I won't prosecute." said Walters. "In fact, I'm going to tell the judge that at the arraignment."

"And we're going to tell the judge that he's your Investigator." I replied. "I've asked the State's Attorney for this region to take the case, since your Office is too close to it, and she has agreed to take it to trial."

"Why, you son of a-------"

"Ah ah ah!" the Chief warned. "Your Investigator is already hip-deep in it with the Iron Crowbar. You might not want to add to it with your own namecalling."

"I want to talk to him." said Walters, meaning her Investigator.

"Sure." I said. "But you cannot legally represent him, being the D.A., so you have absolutely no attorney-client privilege. As such, you will not be permitted to talk alone with him, at all, and I will listen in on any conversation you have with him, most likely by being right there in person."

Miriam's eyes widened at that. "Then I'll get him an attorney------"

"Which I don't have to let him talk to until Monday morning." I said. "As long as we don't question him, we can wait until the morning of his arraignment." I'm not sure exactly how true that was, but the point was being made that I was going to fight Miriam Walters all the way on this one.

"Can I speak to you alone for a moment, Chief?" Miriam tried.


"No." said the Chief. "I want a witness in every conversation you and I have about this, and I will tell you now that I intend to record every conversation we have about this."

"Look." said Walters. "My Investigator was undercover for me. And you can play these chickenshit games, but I am going to get him out of here. Now why don't you work with me on this-------"

"What was he undercover about?" I asked. "What was he working on?"

"That's need-to-know information." tried Miriam. She really was not having a good day, I thought to myself.

"You do realize you're talking to the Police?" said Chief Moynahan, letting anger creep into his voice, which caused him to lose the drawl and not prolong his worrrrrds. "WE are the ones who are supposed to be doing the investigating, so if you're doing anything and keeping it away from us, that is a very serious problemmmm."

"I don't agree." said Walters. "I can have my guys investigate things without telling you."

"Let's bring Ripley in here." said the Chief. "We're being stonewalled right now."

"Good!" said Walters. "Then he gets a lawyer-------"

"One more time." I said. "He gets one only if we ask HIM questions." I then got onto the Chief's landline phone and called down to have Ripley brought into the Chief's office.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

When Ripley was escorted into the office, he saw Miriam Walters and said "Ma'am, I tried to tell them------"

"Stop!" Miriam commanded. "Don't say anything. Let me do the talking."

"Probably a good idea, Ripley." I said. "Your potty mouth has said more than enough to my Police Officers... and me." Ripley looked up at me angrily, but said nothing.

"One more time, Miriam." said the Chief. "What was your Investigator's undercover mission?"

"And why did he harangue my Officers?" I asked. "And even physically threaten them? We've got it on tape... he was lunging at them. You DO realize one of them could have shot him dead, because they thought he was going for their weapon? And it would've been ruled a 'good shoot'? You DO realize that?"

"You're asking him questions under the guise of asking me." said Miriam Walters.

"Stop with the legal shenanigans, Mizzz Walters." said the Chief.

"Chief, I don't think Ms. Walters understands the situation." I said. "May I borrow your iPad tablet?"

"You sure may, Mr. Crowbar." replied the Chief. He handed me the iPad tablet.

"My four favorite words: Let's watch some TV." I said as I brought up a composite video of Ripley's actions... especially what he said to me about my daughter. I played it for Walters.

"One more time, Ms. Walters." I said as the video ended. "What was your Investigator's undercover mission that could possibly explain, much less excuse his conduct?"

Walters's beady black eyes changed from anger to defeat. "All right. You release him to me, and I'll tell you."

"You tell us, and I might think about that." replied the Chief. I just raised my eyebrows in a 'He's right, you know' kind of way.

Miriam said "I had him do it on purpose, to see how your Officers responded to an unarmed black man in a white neighborhood verbally accosting the Police."

"Ohhhhhh." I said with mock Rudistan-'ish' joviality. "You were testing us, were you?"

"Yes." said Walters as the Chief ambled over towards her. "With the increasing hostilities between Blacks and Police Officers nationwide------

"IT IS NOT YOUR PLACE TO TEST THE TCPD!" the Chief shouted into Miriam's face, as furious with anger as I'd ever seen him, his face almost purple with rage. "THAT IS NOT YOUR JOB!"

"I don't agree-------" Miriam started, but Chief Moynahan was not having one bit of it.

"YOU WERE WRONG!!!" he shouted again. "THAT WAS ENTRAPMENT!"

The Chief continued: "And you almost got your Investigator here killed! The Commander is right: my Officers were within their rights to shoot him dead for lunging at them! Did you even THINK of THAT?"

"Your Officers passed the test." said Miriam. "And it wasn't entrapment."

"Where is your warrant to conduct the sting, then?" I asked. "Ohhhhh, there isn't one! I know because my people checked, and I personally checked. You don't have a leg to stand on, here."

"Furthermore," said the Chief, a little more levelly, "you are not the Inspector General's Office. You do not have one bit of oversight over this Police Force, none at all! You have absolutely stepped over the line, Ms. Walters."

"I still don't agree with that." said Walters. "But I'll consider myself corrected if you let me take my employee out of here."

"And you'll introduce us to your other two Investigators, so we know who they are?" I said, my voice level but with no lack of authority in it.

Miriam sighed, then said "Yes. I'll bring them over Monday morning. And I'll have them share what they've found out about the drug traffic moving in here with your Vice Squad."

The Chief and I looked at each other, and I nodded. In case you readers have not figured it out, this scene had played out almost exactly according to the 'script' he and I had discussed the night before.

"All right." said the Chief. "Get him out of here."

Miriam stood up, as did Ripley. He extended his hand to me and said "No hard feelings, Commander?"

I turned to face him, my eyes boring into his...

*WHUMP!*

"UHHK!" Ripley gasped, doubling over from the force of the powerful closed-fist punch I'd slammed into his belly.

*WHAM!* *WHUMP!*

My right-hand haymaker caught him on the side of the face, then my left-handed punch caught him right on the jaw.

Ripley went down like a stone. With lightning speed I landed on top of him, my knees pressing into his shoulder joints, which was not only very painful, but immobilized him. I shoved my red crowbar into his face... not his neck, but his face right over his mouth. He attempted to turn his head and I pressed harder, which was painful to his jaw.

"You son of a bitch!" I angrily near-shouted, my face showing my pure fury. "You really think I'm going to forgive what you said about my daughter?"

"Commander!" Walters protested.

"MY DAUGHTER!" I yelled as loud as I could, still looking at Ripley but meaning both of them to hear it. "You crossed the line, asshole! And I will never... EVER... forget it! And if I ever see you in this County again... EVER!... a stray bullet will find its way into the back of your head!"

There was a knock on the door; the Chief had called the Duty Desk to have Officers come down. I got off Ripley, who wisely didn't try to counterattack me. The door opened and Lt. Rudistan and Corporal Hicks came in.

"Gentlemen," I said to them, "escort this piece of trash to the County Line or State Line of his choice, and let him out on the other side of it. If he ever, and I mean ever comes back into this County, arrest him. I would imagine he will resist, like he did last night, and when he does, use whatever force necessary to take care of the situation."

"Yes sir!" Rudistan said enthusiastically.

"Move, you prick." Hicks said harshly to Ripley. "And please give me a reason to do something to you." Ripley looked over at Walters, who nodded slightly to him, then left with my 'Blood Order' Officers.

"Well!" said Miriam Walters. "Your Officers passed, but you just failed, Commander."

"Failed what?" asked the Chief. "I didn't see anything."

"Let's look at the tape just one more time." I said, bringing out my iPhone. I replayed the part of the video where Ripley had called my daughter a 'halfbreed'.

"What I'm going to do," I said, "is show this to Paulina, and maybe Franklin, too. And I just might tell Paulina that you told Ripley to say that."

"I didn't tell him to say that!" Miriam protested. "And I forbid you from showing her that-------"

"YOU DO NOT 'FORBID' ME TO DO ANYTHING!" I yelled into her face. "YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME, IN ANY WAY, IN ANY CAPACITY!"

"All right, all right." said Walters, completely rattled. "Paulina can have the MCD cases. Just don't show her that."

"You don't get it, do you?" I asked, my voice 'quiet', but the underlying anger still there. "This is not a negotiation. That piece of shit called Paulina's daughter a racial epithet. YOUR employee's daughter. Now if you had fired that piece of dog shit the second you heard that word, I might've considered not telling her. But you didn't. He still works for you."

"Okay, okay------" started Miriam.

"GET the picture!" I shouted into her face. "I wasn't kidding. I am going to show this to Paulina; there is nothing on this earth that can stop me from doing that."

"Why don't you head back to your offisssss, Ms. Walters." the Chief 'suggested'. Miriam looked at him then turned and left, not looking at me again.

"Well, Mr. Crowbarrrr." drawled the Chief. "What did you hold back that will prevent Ms. Walters from trying to make something of that? Are you really going to show Ms. Patterson that videooooo? That's huuuugggge leverage, you know."

"Oh yes, I'm going to show Paulina." I said. "Imagine if I didn't, and she finds out anyway." The Chief nodded.

I continued: "And what Walters should truly fear is that I show this to the entire Police Force, and tell them that Miriam Walters personally was trying to entrap them. And we'll see if she figures out that she has to run for her Office again, too..."

Part 4 - Alignment of Pieces

"This is Bettina Wurtzburg, KXTC Channel Two News!" shouted the redheaded MILF reporterette at 7:00am, Monday, January 6th. "Legislators dig in as the State House moves to impeach deeply unpopular Governor Val Jared!"

Bettina began: "A scheduled meeting between State House and State Senate staffers with the Governor's staff to get Budget negotiations rolling ended when the Governor's staffers walked out, saying that the Legislature staffers wouldn't talk about the budget but only threatened the Governor with impeachment if he did not immediately resign. A spokesperson for Representative Tasheeka Harris said that the Governor's negotiators weren't negotiating but making intractable demands, including cutting the State EPA's funding for Climate Change programs."

Bettina: "And over the weekend, State Attorney General Karl Handel announced his candidacy for Governor. Roll tape."

Tape rolled, showing Karl Handel saying "We must take the Republican Party away from Governor Val Jared's racist policies, and return to the true Republican values of compassion for Undocumented Workers, as well as tax breaks for large companies in order to create jobs for the working classes!"

Back to Bettina live: "Lieutenant Governor and Jared crony Sharon Marshall also has announced her candidacy for the Governorship, as a Republican. Her platform would be a continuation of Val Jared's racist policies." KXTC did not show one second of Sharon Marshall speaking, as they had shown Karl Handel. "And now let's go to Jeff Hull for more on the National Championship game! Jeff!"

"That's right, Bettina!" said Jeff Hull, every one of his full head of black hairs perfectly styled into place, as he came on the screen with University Memorial Stadium in the background. "The No. 1 Alabama Crimson Tide faces our University's arch-rival, the No. 2 Wildcats, in Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta for the Crystal Trophy and the National Championship. The Wildcats will have two Heisman Trophy winners on their squad, but they face the SEC's best offense and the Nation's best defense against the run."

Hull: "Alabama is heavily favored to soundly beat the Wildcats, and Bulldogs fans here are mixed in who they want to win. Roll tape."

Tape rolled, showing several people commenting. Some University students said they wanted the Wildcats to win because they were in the same Conference as the Bulldogs, while others said they would root for ISIS terrorists against the Wildcats. Then Todd Burke was shown, saying that he wanted the Conference to be well-represented. And last was Your Green Crowbar, Cindy Ross, who said emphatically "Roll Tide Roll!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Any questions?" Cindy Ross said cooly as a couple of others in the coffee klatch stared at her. We were drinking coffee in the Chief's Conference Room, and it was Your Iron Crowbar and Your Iron Wolf that were staring daggers at her.

"Just one." I said. "Just how much are you and the Iron Wolf betting?"

"Not one penny." said Teresa. "I don't need her filthy Alabama money."

"She knows she'd lose if she bets with me." Cindy retorted. "So what are you and Joanne betting, Commander?"

"Dinner at the Chop House." I said. "But I don't know what Bowser and Leo may have bet on the game."

"My dog, is an awesome dog, and I, will rejoice in him..." sang Teresa, in a clever paraphrasing to the tune of that popular Christian song.

"Changing the subject," said Tanya Perlman, to change the subject, "I think it's obvious who Bettina wants to win the Republican primary for Governor."

"Yeah," I said, "the Media will fawn on Karl Handel, but if he wins the primary they will turn on him like rabid dogs. John McCain and Mitt Romney learned that the hard way with the national Media."

"Who's running for Governor on the Democrat side?" asked Sheriff Griswold.

"You're the politician in here, Sheriff." I replied. "Who do you... and the Governor... think will run?"

"Har." barked the Sheriff. "I can tell you that Val does not care. He'll endorse Sharon Marshall, but otherwise he's telling me how much he's enjoying not having to campaign for anything. As to who is running, we're pretty sure Maxine Watts won't, but other than that, I have no idea."