All Comments on 'Time to Trade Up'

This is a pretty good story over all but the conversation that the husband and wife have on page 3 after they had sex makes no sense at all

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The wifec s complaining about the dullness of their sex routine and how she wants to try new things sexually. The husband says this

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."Cheryl, we have never done those things because you were not interested. Every suggestion of something else got downplayed by you. Now you say you need a new man to give you those new experiences; experiences you could have had with me for the past 25 years but declined."

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To wifes answer is a complete non sequitur. It's almost as if the having 2 different conversations. And since the sex is the major reason why the husband is divorcing the wife... In fact that the white does not have a rational answer here is the problem. The entire conversation makes no sense at all

Interesting beginning !

5

Don't need a part 2.

Im not sure a part 2 is needed the story could end here. The wife got what she wanted and the husband can move on with Tara...a well written story but maybe a bit too much story. Anyway thanks for writing.

Some factual errors and yes this is a work of fiction but it night end up hurting readers... Who value India and Hindu faith

There can never be a Rhasheedguru because Rasheed is a Muslim name and Muslim Teachers are never Gurus. It is the Hindu Teachers who are called Gurus. And randomly using a Indian Guru to whip up some crazy theory / course is just not there even in a piece of fiction

Really good. Plot exceptional and characters brought to life. Keep on writing .

Good story, but the kids finding out about the one guy that she screwed, only twice, while she wasn't in town, feels like too much of a coincidence.

Fantastic, thoughtful and well-written story. Instead of writing the usual LW story that deals in the extreme emotions and interactions, you went for a gentle, yet effective, subtlety. The entire story, characters, plot and pace, were absolutely perfect. This felt like a real-life, believable life story.

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Some will decry the million-to-one coincidence of Robbie and Matt working together, but such is the serendipity of life. That particular aspect of the story was VERY well handled. Some writers would have Robbie overturning the table, punching Ted and being led away in handcuffs as a way to reveal him mother's treachery. You, however, handled it as if it would play out in real life, with the low-key, stunned aspect of Robbie's discovery crushing the more-dramatic option with its multi-layered implications.

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GREAT story.... I can't wait for Part 2!!!

Not bad, but far too long for what all went down. Not interested in part 2 as almost all the drama was done in the first couple of pages of chapter 1.

Well done, can't wait for part 2

Well written, pushes the beleivabilty envelope but didn't roll over into stupid.

Why is it that the woman is characterized as a complete fool?

Why didn't the title say part one so I knew to avoid reading this?

good start looking forward to the end, stupid women oh well happens to both parties wrong choices

Loved it. Glad there will be a part 2. Cheryl needs to feel some pain (emotional), but eventually I hope Marvin takes her back

4.5 Stars

Another stupid wife playing stupid game.

Got a stupid prize. She deserved it.

/

For the story, I somehow thought adding Greta into the picture is quite unnecessary.

Especially when they had their talk in the end.

So she's a lesbian. But why she's acting flirty and ultra feminine (kissing stuff) with Marvin?

Minus Greta would have shorten a bit the number of pages.

But all in all, it was one good story.

So there's going to be a chapter 2? I don't think it is necessary.

I am not interested what happened to Cheryl, I do wonder why.

But hey it isn't my story. Thanks Sunshineman2019.

A story where a wife suddenly had a vagina for a brain.

Non-sensical replies to her husbands statements....

Great story but Greta being a lesbian with a wife in Atlanta is confusing. Why would she have a wife in Atlanta and live across the country? Why does Greta’s wife not travel to the town where the story is set? It feels like a lazy way to resolve Marvin dating two women.

Great thanks 5⭐

Too long. The first four pages could have been condensed into one. Too bad, it was a great story line.

Well this was a pretty complete story as is, I did not see this as a multi-part story. The next segment does not have much to work with other than his relationship with Tara and the continued fall of CJ.

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5*, Hooyah, salutes...

Well written but I have to agree with some of the other comments so far. This story line is too predictable. Wife wants a hall pass to explore for a period of time over her husbands objections, and husband discovers he has a lot better options during this time and files for the divorce. Wife continues with her delusion that everything will be fine with husband in the end in spite of repeated evidence otherwise during her fun period. This story is not quite finished but unless there is something more original in the next chapter, I’m not sure you should bother to finish.

Too long

I really liked it, typical loving wife bs about finding herself.

Good story, disappointed that it is being continued. A little wordy at some points. Please continue to write, you have real talent.

The author warns us that the story is 8 or 9 pages long. Good, nice warning. All wasted because the author IS TOO STUPID TO MARK IT PART 1!

So sick of authors pulling this crap. 1*

Quite good, though a little stretched out. The back-and-forth waffling between them at the beginning felt a little unnecessary, and streamlining that part could have made the story a little leaner. Not sure what to make of Greta's reveal, feels a little too convenient for story's sake, and don't really buy her reasons for why she had to wait till the divorce was done to tell him. It already feels like a complete story, though. Part 2 will really have to work for it to justify its inclusion.

This was pretty good but felt nearly wrapped up here on page 8 of the first part. Not sure why you split it where you did, what remains to be covered, or certainly not what could possibly take another 8-ish pages to wrap up to justify a Part 2

The problem with stories like this is that it's not taking characters and putting them in unusual, stressful situations. It's taking incredibly stupid characters and putting them in unusual, stressful situations.

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The wife was an idiot. No one would believe the things she believes if they had an IQ over 80. The husband wasn't believable. His initial response should have been "If you go on a date with another man, we will be getting divorced. If you have sex with another man, we'll be getting divorced and I'll be letting everyone we know in on what has occurred. I've called the children and told them what you planned so I won't be blamed when we get divorced."

The dialog was a bit long winded. But the story made up for that. I liked it.

They had a crappy therapist.

Kiss my ass Greta. Hello Tara

A little drawn out, but a wonderful story. Marvin is a stand-up guy and will probably end up with Tara. Cheryl not only f-cked Ted, she f-cked herself. Maybe she'll live on the streets and become a coke-whore...

Well, your technical writing skills need a little work. The dialogue was stiff and the tags were repetitive. Still, you had a high 4 or possibly a 5 until I got to the end of page 8, only to find it was a multi-chapter story! That is a BIG no, no for me. If it is to be an ongoing story, let people know from the start with a "chapter1." Now I feel like I've just wasted my time reading 8 pages, knowing I won't read any more of the story, so your 4 or 5 just dropped to a 3, and that's being generous.

First, this story was maybe four or five pages too long. Wife wanted a hall pass, husband gave her a divorce and moved on, the end. A little filler is good, but a lot of this was just drivel.

Second, choose a position for your characters. The husband literally flip-flopped for the first three pages between trying to save the marriage and letting the wife go. In the natural order of things, if a wife wanted a hall pass, a husband would either be begging her to stay and then crying in his beer or just straight up telling the bitch to kick rocks. Not both and damn sure not needing to debate it. Most men are not that indecisive. Then there were those other empowered bitches that supported the wife "taking control of the marriage" only to back down when it gets mentioned that the husband was trading up.

Third, there's a part two to this? Why? I can almost guarantee it's gonna suck for one reason or another.

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This story reminds me of a few other stories I've read where the story has a good premise and the makings to be a great story only to fall flat because of one reason or another. This is honestly a decent standalone that's probably best kept left alone.

3-stars.

-JMFC

An OK read, but way too long. And why do you feel the need to wrote a part 2? Another eight pages? Please, no! And get a reviewer to fix incorrect word choices before submitting (e.g., you used "fowl names" instead of "foul names" on page 7)..

First of all, you created a character, Cheryl, who belongs in the Martian Slut Ray Hall of Fame! Holy tamale but was this woman stupid! Even after being reamed by her kids, this mental midget STILL continued to delude herself. And her biggest delusion was always thinking that Marvin would accept her adultery as “OK”.

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Marvin played it straight, and about as fair and correct as possible.

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The Greta diversion was unnecessary, especially for the “twist” of her lesbianism.

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Overall, the story entertained and was a good…but not great….rendition of this particular LW trope.

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4****

Well written but I think it should perhaps be under Mature instead of Loving Wives.

There is no fun or excitement about casual sex.

Had that slut proposed that to me, she'd have been out of there pronto. When she says she wants to go back, it's because of the country club status, etc., not love for her husband. He and the kids should abandon her and maybe she'll eventually be a street-whore...

Well done, thoroughly enjoyed. Look forward to Chapter 2.

Thanks

I was figuring on giving it a 5 star rating, even if the dialogue was a little long winded, until the ending. Why won't authors tell us in advance that it is a multi-part story? If I had known, I would have waited for the conclusion and then read the whole story at once. That is one of my pet peeves and caused me to reduce my rating. Thank you for your effort.

Eight pages at this is still not done?

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Fuck that shit!

Well done thus far.

‘with the famous Indian yogi Rhasheedguru‘. Seriously? Do u do any homework? If u can’t do your basic work that would have told u that Rhasheed is a Muslim name and Guru is a Hindu teacher …and they don’t come together in a single Word!!!!

How odd? Normally get commentators screaming for a finish to a story...even though it's not their story, this tale has most commentators saying no to a part 2? It is your story sunshineman so write as many parts as you like they don't have time to read them, however if they're all as good as this was they will! Thank you for all the time you took to make it so good...yes a little wordy but everyone tells a story a different way.

I was initially hesitant to read this due to the length and some of the comments but I'm glad I did. Yes, it's a little long but I never found myself skimming as I do on some stories. I found the whole story interesting. I'm not going to score this until I see the next chapter. I will say that I don't see any way possible they could reconnect. What the wife did was beyond disrespectful and to top it off she lied about being faithful even to the extent that she was planning to continue with Ted. Looking forward to Chapter 2.

The moment this veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery tired line, which is verbatim in sooooo many of these stories hit "At the end of the six months, I will come back to you and we can work out a plan for the rest of our lives. I expect to be the fun-loving young woman you fell in love with in college." I knew I didnt need 8 pages of dragged "I love you, but need other men to fuck and hope you'll understand" back and forth stuff.

From the sounds of it Im not far off the mark though.

It's interesting how close he came to taking back a cheating skank....the whole idea of taking her back after 6 months was nonsense....interesting story for the most part, but Marvin comes across as pretty soft for a serious business owner.

The term "claptrap" comes to mind. Think you could have used "modern woman" a few more times? You damn sure beat us over the head with it enough. Do you think the readers are as dumb as the central characters? A long sloooow version of one of the more over-used tropes in LW. Better luck next time.

To long, too much fluff. And a part two, not looking forward to it.

Don’t see a need for any more. A simple 1/2 page epilogue would suffice. Of course, with this author at least, that probably means 2 pages. Could see the golfing lesbian coming from a mile away. Am curious though, why the wife/wife separation? Maybe that’s the basis of part two? If so, why would we care? Greta’s character and certainly the phantom wife were certainly not developed enough.

A little wordy but a good story. Not sure why you had to continue it after 8 pages when just a little more would wrap it up. Making Greta a lesbian was a cheap shot and too easy a way to take her out of the picture. Besides, since she's lied to him about a very important subject, why would he trust her going forward and why would he want to be in business with someone he couldn't trust? That's a big issue for him. I will give you credit for one of the funniest mistakes - EVER! When Cindi learns of her mother's betrayal she used "fowl" words. I spit my drink thru my nose! Fowl = types of birds. Foul = something evil or odiferous. Too funny for words. If you do put up a second chapter don't wait too long.

I hate this, loved the story but when I got to [ Continued in Part2 ] I got that sick feeling in my gut. I hope it doesn't take long to finish it. I hate two part stories that are published months apart. Please finish it quickly so I don't have to re-read the first part just to remember the beginning. Thanks

I really liked your plot, and your characters. But I agree with commenters that something was very odd about the dialogue. It felt stiff, and awkward. I would love it if you relaxed a bit and let the dialogue be more natural, more reflective of the emotions in the moment. I believe you wanted both of the main characters to appear dignified, but for me it felt sterile. Any work of art becomes successful by eliciting a reaction from its consumer, and this (for me) wound up flat. Loosen it up, especially in their exchanges with each other! Anxious to read part 2.

Well shit - that was REALLY good! Everything you laid out for the readers could be a replay in someone's actual marriage. I really look forward to part 2. The narrative was a little stinted in the first page or two, but flowed well once you got going. Really well done! 5*

Too boilerplate. Having the husband find out about Ted pushed this story along the typical LW fare. It would have been a better story if he hadn’t found out, and see where it went from there.

The “C” word bit was interesting; that was well done. But it said, without saying directly, that her example of a friend who had a drunken one nighter, and her husband forgave her, as a bad example, because the husband couldn’t see the forgiving husband as anything but a cuck.

8 chapters for a part 1? Yeah, okay. Long-winded and boring, which sucks because it has all the ingredients for something great. I understand that the point is to show how delusional and self-centered Cheryl is, but there is far too much dialogue that just goes nowhere. A couple of conversations like that is enough; let her actions drive the point home from there. You could easily trim a good 3 pages or more off of this.

That said, I do like how Marvin stuck to his guns, protected himself and pointed out his wife's hypocrisy and selfishness at every turn. It didn't do any good since she just ignored everything, but at least he spoke up about things so many LW husbands keep silent about, save for inner monologues, in these kinds of stories. Like how their stale sex life wasn't his fault.

So, you bother to mention that this will be 8 or 9 pages long, but you didn't bother to put chapter/part 1 on the title.

Why?

So in chapter 2 Cheryl gets disgraced more and Marvin marries Tara. You could have wrapped up in a couple more pages. A good read over all, thanks for sharing.

Why?!? This story is absurd! The correct response to the wife’s ambush is to bury her under the rose bushes. An acceptable response is to immediately divorce her while letting everyone know the reason why. No real man would dither and wait for her to go through it. If she states intent to commit adultery, then she has already done it in her mind.

ZK

Look forward to part 2, part 1 was good.

How stupid was Cheryl, what dumbass bitch slut.

She deserved what she got

4/5

Even though I was a bit put off by Marvin's willingness to play nice, while his tramp wife continued to disrespect him in the most extreme manner, he followed through and ditched her as he had threatened.

I also suppose that the idea of having her served for abandonment, with an agreement to, at the end of six months, to actually have BOTH of them SIGN the petition on a pretense that they would ceremoniously tear up the agreement & drink Champaign is way out bullshit... BUT I liked it. Original.

Five big ones from me. *****

For the most part I liked the story, but:

-to warn us the story is 8 or 9 pages long with no indication in either the title or the warning that it is only part 1 seems devious and ridiculous

-the story doesn't seem to need a part 2 to me-he's got Tara, the marriage is over and it is difficult to see where it can go that makes a part 2 suitable

Those points seemed important to me so I downgraded the rating to 2 stars.

That was one of the best stories that I have ever read.

Great story!!! The wife was stupidly listening to unqualified people and felt she could have everything her way. In the sequel, please let the main character find love and happiness!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Moronic story. The author is trying to portray smart and determined man ("great catch") and yet he only managed to portray a cuckold.

1. This character decides to wait 6 months (!) while fully expecting his wife will not wait. How stupid is that?

2. He did not ensure in any way to learn about her infidelity, in fact his intention is to "ask her" about that??? While she is taking all the steps to conceal her cheating and is already planning to continue even after she "comes back" into marriage.

3. He learns about her cheating by a sheer luck, meaning if it is according to his "preparation" he would be no wiser than any cuckold, even worse as he was told and expecting it while doing absolutely nothing to get a proof and learn about that. Does that sound to you as a "prepared" man?

4. He has already accepted her sharing intimacy with "Roberto" who is somehow out of the picture afterwards but has not done anything to check out the potential cheating, rather he believes to his wife that it isn't. Is that "dignity" or a sheer "stupidity". No wonder she continues with her plan, the husband has just shown how clueless he would be.

The only good advice he accepted from friends was to avoid confrontation before he has a proof and to facilitate divorce without the need to go through adversarial process.

The very idea of 6 months waiting period while wasting his virility only to learn (by chance) that he waited like a buffoon in vain, is so utterly stupid that the author has to be truly dense if he thinks he is describing a smart and dignified character.

What you have here is a cuckold, fool, self-deluded buffoon. Any woman that was going for him has a clear picture how stupid he is and how easy will be to manipulate him while he swims in his deluded sea of self-righteous stupidity while clutching the deflated lifesaver of "dignity."

1 star not for bad writing but for totally missing the mark.

Despite its length you kept it dramatic and interesting. If there is a plot fault it is the incredible thinking and behavior of Cheryl. Her attitude announcing the separation was so cold, calculated, unfeeling, and selfish that their previous loyal loving respectful 24 years of marriage is unbelievable. Her transformation from virtuous ethical loving wife and mother into a stupid shallow arrogant cheating slut smacks of Martian Slut Ray. I mean, what happened? Oh, she read some books, was influenced by some equally slutty friends or femiNazi speakers and writers? No, not believable. Apparently your experience with virtuous intelligent women is slight or non existent. Virtuous ethical loving wives DO NOT conduct friendships with nor take advice from whores, or anyone who might urge her or applaud her betraying her marriage. You might as well portray a survivor of a Nazi death camp chumming around after the war with retired veterans of the Gestapo.

So if you want to portray such a radical change in character and behavior as Cheryl's you have to spend more time making her transformation understandable and plausible. A few sentences stating that their marriage and their sex life was recently cooling off doesn't explain anything She suddenly wants her husband and strange cock too (Hey, don't ALL women?) means she was always a whore just waiting for the opportunity to not get caught, or she's had some mental dysfunction that was left out of the story. You ended the story with her only real regret is that her husband found out that, with the right man she's a lying cheating enthusiastic whore. "It was just sex? I PROMISE I won't do it again?" At that point you have made her a complete bimbo. It was actually a bit insulting, to women who really do need to assert their independence and self reliance, as well as us readers, who know better. A true feminist is a person who loves and respects women. Cheryl didn't love or respect anyone, least of all herself. She turned into a 5 year old with a woman's vagina and teenager's sex drive: I hope Daddy doesn't catch me sneaking out my bedroom window to meet the pool boy.

So it was a great plot idea and it was well told. Cheryl is a cartoon villain to make the story work. You did what very many LW writers do, so its no great failure, just a common one. I expect you will get better and I look forward to reading future work.

I will withhold my vote until I see the entire work. Good luck with it. And thanks for the effort.

Part 2? What would happen then? He can't find someone else and end up with his slutty x again? The story was toooo long for a second part. Don't make it worse. ****

5 stars - I like this story, please write more.

Although, I also agree with other commenters that this story is finished right now - with a happy ending.

Good story, can't wait for part 2

Kind of an abrupt stopping point

But the six month program she laid out wasn't designed to reach marital equality. The goal was her calling the shots after the time alone weakened him. He was also supposed to accept his 26 week cuckdom.

Same old story - tear him down and become the relationship's alpha.

I did like the insight about 'women in their forties marry older men while men of the same age marry younger women'. It's a common refrain in women's blogs.

This has already been done to death, revived and murdered again multiple times and in multiple grotesque ways.

The wife with an IQ of pond life flushing her marriage on a moronic hall pass plan while the perfect husband loses the ability to talk like a male human being.

The writing was ok but the plot wasn't.

2*

It's a good story, I'm enjoying it. Not sure what else you need to cover, but hopefully it won't include a reconciliation. That woman's a basket case and she'll only get worse if she keeps reading all the feminist tripe.

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Your dialogue is very formal, even stiff. You might want to try using contractions; that's how most people speak and it's a little easier to read. Otherwise, you've written a good story. Personally, I think the husband should have been more decisive, like, "If you move out just to date other men, the divorce will absolutely take place." That's me though, and this is your story, so don't let the comments be your guide as to what tale you want to tell.

Thanks for posting. Well done. 5 stars.

Is English the author's second language? If it is ignore the comment in this paragraph. The writing was extremely stiff. The dialogue was as if computers or autistic people were talking to one another. It was truly really bad. However, if English is your second language then I guess it's not that bad. I speak, read and write four languages; however, if I were to try to write a story in anything other than English it would probably be worse than this one.

I can't believe the high score for this story. It's what prompted me to read it in the first place, but by the second page it was like plodding through mud. I guess the only thing LW readers care about are that the women gets a bad ending, and the aggrieved husband gets the younger, hotter woman.

along with a head trip about age is doomed for failure. TK U MLJ V NV

The dialog is a bit stilted, but one of the best takes on the hall pass scenario I have read.

There were some inconsistencies as the combination of a Muslim name and an Indian Guru. Otherwise, the whole time I felt like kicking both protagonists.

The outcome when one spouse is too self-centred and expects the other one to revolve around him or her is a self-fulfilling prophecy. It was a given that Cheryl would sample some strange as Marvin handing her the walking papers.

In terms of length, I'm dreading chapter 2.

8 pages is too long next time make it a two part story.

A well told story. Yes, this same basic story has been told many times. There are just many ways to tell it. I enjoyed yours. I am reminded what somebody said about movies on the Hallmark channel.... Ten basic plots, twenty actors, and a hundred movies. So what? It is always in the telling.

My only complaint is I did think your dialog was stilted. It was a little too formal. Educated people speak in complete sentences and I tend to do the same. But try using contractions and possibly idioms. Say the dialog out loud. If that is not how you would say it, change it.

Many of the comments and harshest criticism comes from people who have never submitted a story. This is one of the roughest categories on Lit. I applaud you for your efforts. I'm not really sure how much more of the story you can add. If you had planned to continue you could have broken the story into halves so it was not so long at one reading. I personally hesitate to read a story over5 or 6 pages unless I see a few comments. I look for positive comments from 'known' commenters. Fell free to contact me directly if you would like a private discussion. 5 stars

The story was quite good. However, the dialog was a little too formal. Contractions in those conversations are very much appropriate. The way it’s presented seems more like a school paper for English 101.

But other than that, I enjoyed it.

I loved the story. Can't wait for ch 2.

Kinda late in the game for old Greta to come clean on the "carpet munching" thing!

This is a good story, lots of detail and character building. The biggest issue I see is the dialog. it's entirely too formal, and at times the characters all sound the same, which throws off the flow. One of the hardest things to do as a writer is finding a unique voice for each character, that fits the character's personality. if the author could find that it would elevate this from a good story to a great one.

I thoroughly enjoyed the story. I found the MC quite admirable, in light of the way the LW acted. IMHO the story's length was just right. I'm really hoping that the promised part 2 is written and posted. As for Cheryl, her exploration of her new feminism seemed to end up just like most trial separation stories do with adultery shorn of all the pretentious philosophical posturing. I chuckled when towards the end she apparently abandoned her high faluting promise to return 1000% faithful and re-dedicated to Marvin, as she contemplated hooking up with good old Ted every so often! In fact, she basically confirmed what Marvin believed and expressed to her, namely that he was just her fall back option. Its a testament to her self-centeredness that she didn't recognize the irony. I'm also somewhat surprised that her kids took back up with her, even in a limited way. Oh, one last thing, I kept waiting for Roberto to pop up, but that he didn't surprised me -- well played.

wooden dialogue, bouncing POV.

Looking forward to the next part

Hmm...everyone seems to think it's so out of character. But I have been witness to no less then 5 examples of stable and steady wives/mothers going through midlife chrisis and throwing away their lives for "freedom". That martian slut ray is actually hormonal perimenopausal changes that do affect womens thinking. Of course by the time they figure it all out, their lifr is trashed. Unlike these stories though no one comes out ok. The mariage is trashed the kids are devastated and both partners are burned to the core. Glad this is all make believe and no one actually got hurt. 5*

Overall the story was good. The lesbian golf pro part doesn’t work. When the MC told her how he felt she would have told him that she was gay. Other than that it was a good story. Four stars.

To say the dialogue is stilted is an understatement. In my opinion the dialogue is significantly bloated- 8 pages is way too long for such a worn plot line. And who talks like this, especially when there is a need to illustrate/reflect discourse between people who are emotionally charged and in major conflict? The male MC is way to cerebral, particularly in his initial responses. The female MC reads like a petulant adolescent. Finally, the presumed editing is clearly lacking; sentence structure is at times terrible, often hard to read and stiff, overly precise, reads like an academic piece, certainly not as fictional story. Number of misspells. No need for chapter 2. I don't understand the high score.

Crazy as it is I enjoyed the read. It borders on stupidity but stranger thing have happened. A six month hall pass?, wanting to experience sex with other men, life will be great when I return. Drafting up divorce papers that basically favors the husband. I don't know how this remotely connects with reality.

A part 2, why?

This long winded tale seems complete.

As numerous commentators have posted, this piece is not original in its plot, the dialogue is a bit stiff and the overall story is long.

This is Literotica; not Literature 220. You could cut over 60% of the drivel out of this and make it a much more entertaining story. If you have to jam a plot point down the throat of the reader, then you're not doing it right. The warning on page one does not have to be repeated on every other page. We get it... he set his standards and gave fair warning. You could cut the conversations down to something that actually might happen. Try talking them out. It has potential but I fount it to be trite, stuffy, and BORING. If you're going to be descriptive, do it in scene setting or internal emotionality... the rest is just unnecessary filler.

Ending didn't make any sense! If was the case then surely Greta would have told him when he was worried that she thought he didn't want her?

It was way too long, I had to read it over a couple of days. But I did finish it. Just too much BS.

I liked this story but you probably have just tacked on another page or so and been done with it.

The red herring of Roberto was nice. The deus ex machina of her son and ted’s son working together was jarring.

Good story but the one theme that makes me sad is how together the guy is and how useless the gal is. Seems to fit our cultural norm of women being used up at menopause while men keep getting better. Maybe true, but sad to me. And I’m a man.

On the positive side I got a thing for good looking lesbians.

Thank you for so many momentary escapes from life’s problems over the many years. It is a sincere heartfelt thank you. Cheers

I'm confused as to why there needs to be a part 2. The story seems pretty complete as is. Both spouses have completed the six month odyssey as best they could and now they are at the only logical conclusion. She thought that she could have her husband's income, status and stability while also banging other men and found that she couldn't. He thought that she might teurn to him more committed and untouched but she didn't. Now they bother are in different but still hopeful lives. He can start a new relationship fully with Tara and trust again. She can be free to date and bang whomever she wants and possibly even find a guy who doesn't mind a cuckold status, sure she won't be as well off as before but at least she won't be broke, jobless and homeless.

Frankly it seems like a happy ish ending to me, unless the next piece has it as a raac story. Which feels like a cop out.