True Love

I had just invested in a new grill that was absurdly oversized even for such occasions, as it should be. Control of the thing somehow drifted away from me as soon as the other men appeared. The general consensus was that I wasn't as qualified as all those BBQ PhDs, and I should focus on the beverage supply.

Laughing, I went away and joined the ladies. As it had become the norm recently, any group of females including Dani was talking in hushed tones with concerned faces. As usual, that changed as soon as a man entered hearing range.

"Sooo, when are we going to meet Ms. Andy?" Lisa asked, obviously trying to change their subject, unerringly finding the sore spot. I saw Dani and Maria cringe. The only way out was a joke.

"Why? Are you interested?"

"Uh, tempting. There's just the minor detail of having to kill Tom first."

Tom was the gentlest person imaginable, but at 2 meters 5 of pure muscle, he wouldn't even notice me trying to kill him.

"Hmmm. Tom, it seems I have to kill you," I shouted in his direction. "Nothing personal."

He just nodded absentmindedly, giving me a thumbs up while he was in a discussion with Paul.

"Wait," Dani played along. "Poor Tom did nothing to deserve this. If our eternal bachelor should pursue someone, it should be me." With that, she theatrically put her hand on her chest, grasping my arm with the other one.

Now we were all laughing hysterically. Dani was as unattainable as the Queen of England, just a lot more attractive.

Suddenly, Dani's lovely face changed into a look of horror as I found myself flying away from her, obediently following Newton's laws to a bumpy landing flat on my back. What the fuck had just happened? I looked up into Ralph's rage contorted face.

"Stay away from my woman, you asshole! You hear me?"

"Ralph..." I tried to calm him down, with my ass still firmly on the ground. Looking around, I saw mouths hanging open all around.

"Shut up, okay? Don't make it even worse. We all know what's going on here."

"Um..." I cleverly retorted.

"What are you talking about, Ralph?" Lisa asked from behind him, sounding clearly puzzled.

"He knows," he stated, waving his perfectly manicured finger vaguely in my direction. "And she does," he added, turning towards his wife.

"Come on, man. Calm down," Paul tried, putting his arm around Ralph's shoulder. Ralph let him do it, but totally ignored him.

"I'm not blind and I'm not stupid, get it?" he added as I was thinking about changing my current undignified position.

I looked around, trying to determine if anybody knew what he was talking about. Ralph's neck had lost its dangerously red color and he threw up his hands in frustration. Finally, he took Dani's hand and literally dragged her away from the group into my house.

As we stood around in embarrassed silence, we could hear Ralph shouting at poor Dani from inside, but couldn't make out the words. It didn't seem there were enough gaps in his lecture to let Dani get a word in. I really didn't envy her for having to endure this and briefly thought about going inside and helping her. Just as I was about to go in, I felt Paul's hand on my shoulder.

"Stay. I don't think it would help."

I nodded, just as a mortified Dani reappeared. I could have sworn she looked a bit guilty, as if she was somehow partially responsible for this fiasco, which seemed absurd. She had done nothing wrong. I debated whether I should talk to her and assure her it was no big deal, but decided to stay away from her for the evening. That was a pity, talking to her was always the highlight of those meetings for me.

After a while, the mood relaxed a bit and we started to talk about more important things, like sports and the weather. A few minutes later, I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around. Ralph was standing there, holding a plate with a burger and a few other yummy items. The plate was way too neatly arranged for him to have done it. Dani had sent it to me as a peace offering.

"Sorry, man. We're good?"

I appreciated an honest man to man apology. I was also averse to conflict and not the type to hold a grudge forever anyway. We all knew Ralph was short fused and tended to overreact. No big deal.

"We're good."

We shook hands, surrounded by relieved faces. Nonetheless, something was going on in the background, and it wouldn't go away that simply. Ralph might be about to go nuts and there was nothing we could do about it.

A few days later, I had gone to the store to replenish my supplies, which were still seriously depleted from the BBQ meeting, when I bumped into Maria. One look at her told me she was in female alarm mode. She had obviously cried at some point and seemed to barely hold herself together. She obviously was on some sort of mission and would hold off her breakdown until right after that was done. I immediately did what was expected of any male in that situation and hugged her.

"What's going on, Maria? You look terribly upset."

"Andy, it's just terrible... I still can't believe it... Nobody would have thought this was possible..." I just wished she'd finally come to the point.

"Ralph has hit Dani last night. It seems it wasn't the first time, she just never told anyone before. Can you believe it? Our Ralph. The sweetest guy ever."

I had a slightly different opinion about our Jekyll and Hyde hybrid, but decided to keep it to myself. Women tended to have a very biased opinion about our golden boy.

"Unbelievable," I said, although I had no problems believing it. "Why did she choose to tell you this time?"

She looked at me as if I was the biggest moron ever.

"Andy, you can be pretty dense. Did you see her eye? Pretty hard not to notice that!"

"Maria, I haven't even seen her since we all met in my garden. How could I know?"

She didn't seem impressed by that detail. I almost heard her thinking 'Men...'

"Her eye was totally black, Andy." She still looked at me, wondering how I could have possibly overlooked that. "She tried to cover it, but that didn't work at all. Then there were bruises all over her body."

"Damn..." I said, mostly to say anything.

"Would you believe she was embarrassed about it? As if it's her fault. Unbelievable..."

"That sucks," seemed a safe reply.

"Right. When she couldn't hide it from us anymore, she started defending him."

I just nodded.

"I mean, Ralph... I mean, he's gorgeous..."

What the fuck had that to do with anything, I thought. Women always saw the best in Ralph and blocked out his ugly sides, just because he was so damn beautiful. They all wore rose colored glasses when it came to Mr. Perfect. I had to endure that throughout my whole childhood. Something was broken? None of the adults even thought about suspecting him. He just stood there, smiling and being beautiful, hiding the maniac inside.

"We're all busy right now, helping her. We have all agreed that you'd better stay away. Sorry... I know how things are... Please understand."

What? What the fuck had I to do with anything? That hurt. Dani was one of my best friends. Why was I suddenly excluded form helping her in her hour of need?

"So, what's happening now, Maria? Is there nothing I can do?"

"No, you need to stay away, you hear me?" This was accompanied by a stern expression, as if I'd been the one to hit Dani. Problem was, I was pretty sure I hadn't.

"What have I done wrong?"

"Come on... Seriously, Andy? Anyway, she's moving out, at least for a few days. She will stay with me and Paul until she knows what she wants."

"Hmm, okay, just let me know if there's something I can do."

Without any further words, but another one of those mysteriously stern looks, Maria just left me standing there, still puzzled.

"Dani, you need to leave Ralph. Moving back in and forgiving him was a mistake. One day, he's going to kill you or someone else," Maria implored.

Not exactly what you expected to hear on a typical BBQ party, but undoubtedly true. I knew the topic had come up before and would come up again. This time, they didn't mind that I and the other guys overheard them, as this was common knowledge by now. Ralph was the best friend you could have, but he was also a damn ticking time bomb. Our whole circle of friends had begun the process of losing their blinders when it came to him. Nobody had any clue what to do for Dani, though. Banning him as a friend was never an option, after what he had done for every one of us.

"Just stop, okay? I know what I'm doing. Stop pushing me, Maria. I'm his wife and I will stay with him, for better or worse. Okay? Got it? He needs me now, and some of it is my fault anyway." Among her other perfections, Dani was loyal to a fault.

This whole thing sucked. Ralph had helped every one of us on numerous occasions. He just did it, it was how he ticked. He never asked for anything in return. All we could offer him was loyalty. That didn't seem much, but it actually was a lot, especially in a situation like this.

Maria just held up her hands, placatingly. "We just want to help, okay?"

Dani's burden, of course, was the heaviest. No one could doubt she loved him. They had seemed made for each other right from the start. They had always been the most popular, the most attractive and the nicest persons around. Many lusted after them, but everyone knew it was hopeless. None of us had been around when it happened, but to us, it seemed they had been born together and would stay that way until they died in each other's arms.

As much as they seemed made for each other, their backgrounds were completely different. Dani came from an upper-middle class home, where she was safe and protected. Calling Ralph's home broken would be like calling the Atlantic Ocean slightly damp. His mother had fled the scene at some point. She must have done so pretty early, as we couldn't even remember her. His father was actually a very nice man and he clearly loved his son, but he was extremely short tempered. I always suspected violence had been a constant in their home.

"I know you're trying to help, but I have to handle this myself, okay? For better or worse, I said. I'm not one to run away when things get tough. You should know that."

We all knew that, I thought as I watched them hug emotionally, their short spat already forgotten. Despite Dani's clear statement, it was our business, whether we wanted it to be or not. It was impossible not to follow their ongoing and constantly escalating drama.

"I'm sorry, Maria. It's just so hard."

"I know," Maria replied, sniffing just as hard as Dani. "Anyway, what happened this time?"

"Pete brought me a burger."

"Dani, Pete brought everyone something to eat."

That's how it always started. Someone did something nice for Dani. Someone talked to Dani. Someone just looked at Dani.

"You can't keep this up, Dani," I said, entering their conversation. "It's getting worse all the time and sooner or later, someone's going to get hurt."

"No! Stop pestering me. Please! It's hard enough as it is. I can't leave him; he wouldn't survive without me. He's my man and I'm going to stand by his side, even when times are rough."

The problem was, times had been rough for quite some time now. Their problems had been escalating for almost a year.

"Why do you stay?" I finally asked Maria after Dani had left to repair her makeup.

"Same reason as you. To keep an eye on Dani."

"Not just Dani. You know, I really like Ralph. I mean, the true Ralph. I can't even remember a time when we've not been friends."

"Really? Andy, is the nice one the true Ralph? Has he ever really been your friend? Do you really like him?"

"Come on. You know how he helped me when I ditched my dad's car in the middle of the night? When he took the blame when Mrs. Parker wanted to kick me from school? When..."

"I know, I know," she interrupted me. "Still, are you sure that's who he is? The nice guy, helping everyone, just sometimes losing his mind and relying on everyone being oh so understanding?"

"What do you mean?"

"Haven't you ever thought it might be the other way around? How unlikely it is that his nice personality just leaves the scene, only to come back later? That he might enjoy those rage trips, that they are his true self? That he might use us to cover his ass, forcing us into it by being nice most of the time?"

"You think..."

"I don't know. Honestly. I know why I stay, though, and it's certainly not for Ralph."

"Dani."

"Dani and you."

"What? I'm not the one you need to worry about." For some reason she looked as if she didn't believe me.

"As long as you and Dani can't break away from Ralph, Paul and I need to stay. You and she are our true friends, and we won't leave you alone as you slide into the abyss, following Ralph."

She suddenly took my hands and looked at me compassionately.

"Andy, Dani might be doomed. We need to get used to that thought. But you, my friend... You might need to let go..."

Before she could continue or I could think of anything useful to add, Dani had returned and Maria left me alone to think about everything and covertly study Dani's fresh, unsuccessfully covered bruises.

I remembered the day when Ralph helped me against the vicious Ostrowski twins. They had ambushed me once again after school and were just starting to beat the shit out of me.

I've always been a big guy, although I used my muscles for sports, not for fighting. The twins were two years older than me and mean bastards. They loved fighting and wore their battle scars proudly, always eager to add more. At some point during the fight, we all turned to look in the same direction, all sensing something evil watching us, as only kids can.

Ralph was just standing there, arms relaxed at his sides. Compared to us, he was a small, fragile boy, thin to the point where people felt the need to spontaneously feed him. Most of all, his face just was too pretty to be involved in a fist fight.

Still, we all knew the Ostrowskis were in trouble. Ralph had this eerily calm look. It was as if he was in some kind of private zone. I noticed the slightly red throat area and the ticking eyelid. This was going to end badly, and I didn't think it was worth it, but that was never an issue for Ralph.

"Come on, Ralphie, we were just playing around," one of them tried. Bad move, I thought. He hated being called Ralphie.

Ralph just calmly started to walk towards us. The twins held up their hands placatingly. They had gotten their asses kicked by him before and were not keen on a repeat, but that's what happened. I tried to help him as I could, but it was more like a symbolic act, and a part of me felt the urge to protect the twins.

As usual, Ralph had no mercy. Not for his enemies nor for himself. He fought without any sense of safety or fairness. He tried to inflict maximum damage, whether it was appropriate or not. He didn't care in the least about being injured himself. I always wondered how long he'd be able to keep his good looks like this, but he was always left mostly unscathed.

After a few minutes, the twins were on the ground, bleeding, and my job had changed from trying to contribute to it to stopping the process. Ralph was still in the zone and might have killed them if no one stopped him. I took him in my arms, talked to him, tried to look him in the eyes until he finally returned to our world.

Damn, what the fuck? I was standing at a busy airport, trying to find my damn luggage when I noticed I was naked and everyone just started to notice and look at me. Terrified, I looked around, trying to find any kind of garment to cover my nudity. There was also a doorbell. It kept ringing until the airport disappeared and I woke up fully, but still a bit confused. Three AM. What the fuck? This had better be important. Somehow, I already knew I would later wish it had been something that wasn't important.

Stumbling down my familiar stairs, I managed to reach the front door.

Dani.

She just stood there, soaking wet from the pouring rain and there was blood on her once white shirt. Damn, this looked really bad.

I yanked the door fully open and pulled her inside, out of the damn rain. She seemed weirdly detached and passive, like a rag doll. Not knowing what else to do, I sat her on a kitchen chair and checked her for wounds.

There was a minor cut on the upper arm, a bruise starting to form on the left cheekbone and a split lip. That didn't explain her shirt.

"It's his blood," she listlessly said, reading my mind.

"Mr. Hyde came out again?"

"Yes." At that point she was interrupted by a crying fit, and I patiently just held her until it ended. "We ordered pizza."

"Come on..." I began, incredulously. "He didn't suspect..."

"He did. I smiled at the pizza guy."

"No way..."

"Way. I mean, I'm 23. I know I'm not ugly. A 16-year-old, pimply kid delivers the pizza and I smile at him, just trying to be a nice person. I mean, seriously..."

"Dani, this is getting out of hand. That is not jealousy anymore; that is madness. He can't possibly have suspected you would have an affair with that kid?"

"I don't know. Not directly. I have no idea. It was probably more about me being too friendly with men in general, encouraging them. Looking for his replacement. That kind of thing."

"This is ridiculous."

"I know, but he can't help it. He's just afraid of losing me. He needn't be, I'm his."

I sighed. I really didn't like hearing that last part. "What happened?"

"Andy, we had a row. A bad one. I was sick of his shit. Then it started. You know it. The red throat. The ticking eyelid."

Oh, yeah did I ever know Ralph's tells. We all knew them by heart. Things got bad when he either felt betrayed or someone got too close to Dani or his friends. As soon as his neck got red and his eye was ticking, we all fled the scene as quickly as possible when we were kids. Except Dani. Dani had always stayed.

"Yes, I know," I replied, pulling myself back into the present. "What now, Dani? As much as it pains me to say, but you need to leave him for good."

"No. I can't. You don't understand. You never did."

Huh? Again, these annoying insinuations nobody ever wanted to clarify. That sucked.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry, Andy. You're a good guy. You did nothing wrong. I'm tired now. Can I use your guest room?"

"Sure, go ahead. You know the way." She had slept in the downstairs guest bedroom often enough, although never without Ralph. I shrugged my shoulders, hugged her and went upstairs, into my own room, hoping the damn airport dream wouldn't return.

A few seconds after my ear touched the pillow, I was rudely awoken by some kind of banging sound. My clock said two hours had passed, which explained my confused condition. Once more, I stumbled towards the landing, trying to figure out what was going on. This was becoming a bad habit.

I was greeted by the rather unexpected sight of my front door crashing in. Slightly less unexpected was Ralph appearing behind it.

"Why didn't you just knock?" I managed to ask before I noticed how contorted his face was. Ralph looked like a caricature of his model-like beautiful face.

He looked totally crazy, dirty and most of all angry. He looked like some kind of supermodel from hell. Another nice touch was the tire iron he was holding. I didn't know why, because there wasn't a single tire inside my house.

"Ralph..." I brilliantly remarked, in case he didn't remember his own name.

"You...," he replied just as cleverly, in case I forgot I was me. "Where is she?"

"Dani?" Who else, I thought? We wouldn't win a prize for the most intelligent conversation in history.

I stumbled down the stairs just as Dani emerged from the downstairs guest bedroom. I briefly noticed the look of horror and shame on her pretty face.