All Comments on 'Unexplained Discoveries Ch. 01 Pt. 01'

The story was okay until the last couple of pages. You the writer turned your loving wife character into a cheating skank whore. You also turned your loving husband into a willing cuckold. Im sure the characters kids will love to learn about their fucked up parents. The score was going towards a 5 then 3 then 2 then 1 star.

Started quite well then suddenly did a nosedive into slut/ cuckold scenario

You write like a 15 year old jacking off. Men are not able to produce 12 or 15 spurts of ejaculate, but then boys don't generally know that. I certainly won't look at anything else you publish. Garbage like this will make you the next writer to be tossed on the pile of those to ignore. One star and that's one too many.

I think you better get her the hell off that island Immediately !!! Otherwise she’s going to become a size queen baby breeder with 8 or so more kids and none of them and none of them later ones would be yours yet you’d be stuck raising them and with one glance all your friends , family and coworkers would know they weren’t yours as well !

She'll put him on the boat back home, and stay behind, dumping him for a real man or real men.

Cuck crap.

.

1 *

The only completely stupid, idiotic part was the "not currently taking contraception" part. She hadn't told her husband but knew they would be on holiday for 3 weeks and she would possibly end up pregnant... at 41! Also, knowing that, she allowed herself to get fucked by a stranger. Like I said, completely stupid.

More stupid Cuck garbage. Put it in Fetish.

Must admit you have chosen a very apt title, for I can’t explain why I kept reading this one—but I did. Certainly it was altogether too long and the story line—a man getting excited watching his wife acting the part of a whore—is a hard sell to any man who has a pair of balls AND loves his wife, and yet you kept me reading; right up to the end I was still expecting to see husband come to his senses. He never did!

Yeah, I know it’s just a story and nothing happens that you didn’t write about, but I must say I’m wondering just how bad the other readers of LW will tear into you.

Still, it’s your first story and I want to congratulate you on having the balls to put yourself out there—I don’t think most of those who trash these stories realize just how tough it is.

GOOD LUCK! CD

Took a long time to get there, but we can all see where this tale is going. Martian slut ray on full power.

Of my f-ing time idiot husband

Cuck drivel. This story is untagged, should be tagged cuckold, lt definitely should be in the Fetish category, NOT Loving Wives, for fucks sake you even tagged it fetish.

Such a fuck up.

Scores 1/5 for being in the wrong category.

I apologize for saying this because I am cognizant of how much effort goes into creative writing, but this is not good. Apart from the sociological crap that the big guy mouthed, apart from the endless and not necessary depictions of sexual bliss, apart from the husband's cuckold fantasies—and so much more: what really is the point of this extended depiction of marital catastrophe? Where is emotion? Is there a lesson? What did you want the reader to take away from this unexceptional presentation?

ROFLMFAO

Sorry dude, you tried this before with the same by the numbers plot.

You really think folks dont recognize your writing? Really? You're dumber than the cucks you base on yourself.

Sorry Closet queen, epic fail just due to the stupidity of it.

Back to that cum guzzling closet kid.

Read 1/2 of page 1 and last paragraph, could see where this stupid POC was going. A 1 only so it would record a score. Deserved a zero?

Stolfiedude this was in no form or fashion entertaining. Why do you cuckold loving writers insist on placing the inane ramblings of your imagination in the Loving Wives category? Do you think you're better received here as opposed to the Fetish category? Cuckolding is a fetish. The act of willingly sharing your wife with another is a sickness. People who do so cannot stand the sanctity of marriage and seek to destroy the institution of marriage. It seems to be a form evil that cannot stand to see anything good exist. If writing about suits you fine but place it where it will be better appreciated. The cuckold loving readers should look in the Fetish category to satisfy their cravings. 1☆

I just don't get this love of cuckold stories? Loving Wives is supposed to be "Married extra-marital fun: swinging, sharing & more" but it seems that the description is WAY TO AMBIGUOUS! Reading about the cuckold lifestyle reveals it to be by profesional consensus, a fetish and deviant lifestyle. Yet Loving Wives moderators ignore the pleas of the readership to better define and moderate the category. Additionally they allow stories with a primary focus on incest, interracial sex, BDSM and domination/submission fill the shelves as well. The idea that people LOOKING for these interest would actually go to the existing categories to find and read them seems to be a foreign concept to the moderators. Just do away with the categories, let people search by tags...oh, wait...that would mean the writers would have to TAG their stories TRUTHFULLY to begin with! Never mind. 1☆

Whoa! Pretty close to my ultimate fantasy. Only regret that her breeding gang bang didn't get into this part of the story. 100 stars to writer, I love a happy ending. This couple were just so turned on that she is on piously going home black bred with a happy hubby. Please finish this story asap!

OK story about a hottie with a sperm fetish and a husband that goes stupid when he gets horny. There was so much semen. Men don’t produce that amount. The island vacation was typical racial BS. Wife with a 70 year old “stud” was weird and so typical as to not be erotic. Worst thing is this was chapter one of part one.

Not great but not terrible either. For a first story it was actually pretty damn good. Some constructive criticism: it was too long for the amount of actual plot that it covered. The parts dealing with his boss, for example, could have been covered in two lines.

The characters were too unrealistic. I know this is literotica not the library of Congress but their actions and reactions were ok while they used more words to describe their thoughts and feelings than Chaucer did in Canterbury tales.

Your pacing is a little slow. The story was almost over before the lot really developed.

All in all, not terrible. A lot of of people will disagree with your choice of man and wife relationship but those people are not being forced to read it. Loving Wives is the harshest reviewed section here. I once wrote a few stories for it and was ready to punch some of the anonymous guys out. Don’t let them get you down. Those who can, do. Those who can’t do it, criticize. Good luck and I’m looking forward to your next installment.

Bpad1

Always the natives get to fuck the naive white woman...BS

Way too many vowels and exclamation marks. This is not the way women react during sex and, because it is so annoying, it diminishes the erotic impact.

Re:bpad1 You're an idiot. You have no idea what you're talking about. Just another keyboard warrior want to be. As to story, the words wife sharing is all I needed to know about this trash. 1*

Just another shit story thrown into loving wives. Too bad it didn't stick. The cucks will moan and howl and fawn over it. That's about it. Try another hobby. Isn't that right Buster2U? And author try not to punch reader's out like bpad1 wanted to do. He apparently wrote a garbage story, knows it, but won't admit it to himself. You got a long ways to go to be in the "hall of fame" of Loving Wives. Very few are capable of joining that club.

People are stupid sometimes!

3

Just 6 3/4 pages too long. No one needs this much nasty cuck shit in one story.

This story is so full of shit, no.1 Old men on the whole do not have big cocks & why would a younger woman fuck a man of 80, he'd be smelly & wrinkly

Fantastic story. You write very well and do a good job of taking the reader on a ride. Unfortunately, you were discouraged by all the hacks that post on this site and did not continue this Opus. My advice, don't even allow comments. You can't win with everyone, but this story needs to continue.

Boring