All Comments on 'Waking the Vengence Pt. 05'

Just read the first five chapters of WtV. I like the way you recap previous chapters. I wish more writers on this site would do so, especially the ones who have long intervals between postings. Strongly recommend requesting a beta reader or two from among your fan base; they're very helpful in finding those pesky typos. Until then, you might try reading it out loud before submission. Your ears will catch many of the errors your eyes slide right over.

Thanks for reading. I'm working with a beta and will be updating as they get me the edited versions. I had enough people asking for the next parts I didn't want to wait for them to catch up.

Love the way you transitioned from just a simple payback mind control story to a story of vengeance for the innocent story, kind of like the old Spectre DC comic books. The only thing missing is a competing force of nature for Greg to overcome and defeat who poses a real threat to everything under Greg's control.

Liked the way he started by protecting his Sister. and then going home finding out his Mother & Sister were submissive and sis wanted him as her own. Then came Lauren someone he took control of and her Barbie. Now he has Amber and Lauren coming around soon. and he isn't done yet. So please continue on.

still early days but I've been thinking of a suitable antagonist for Greg. Maybe an agent of Chaos. We shall see

I'm glad that you are enjoying it. There is much more to come I promise.

Really enjoying this. My only complaint would be a couple of grammatical errors that made me reread a line to make sure if read it right.

@PreacherPorn don't put the nemisis as an agent of chaos as when things are in balance chaos would rule supreme as anything could happen if anything make the nemisis either a agent of good or bad, or even both. Have it so they could want to swing events to either side, you could also have them team up against him.

I gave you 4* on this one because you had his dick shrink from 10 to 9”.

Overall I think you’re doing a wonderful job. Great concept and pacing. I’ll be looking forward to where you take it. So far, a good balance between vengeance and fairness, and I like the way he takes care of the victims.

Thanks...

Rolling right along! Thanks for this piece loving it!

If she's being fucked doggie, how are his balls slapping against her taint?

He tells Charlotte, "You gave yourself to me without my using my powers on you."

Completely untrue. The very first thing he did was tell her "Fuck me" which he interpreted as an order because of this 'magic' the fates gave him. Just more of the infinite number of mistakes, errors and other stupidity in this childish tale.

I am confused. The 'hero' had the police go to arrest the pastors etc because they were using the younger church members for their own sexual gratification (in a sort-of hypnosis) and that was BAD, but then the hero releases their next victim from their mind-spell and instead makes her believe that she needs him instead. How is he any less BAD than they were?

I agree with 'chiefhal' if you're going doggy then the balls slam against the clitoral area, a slight anatomical geography lesson.

Nice story . AAAAA++++

I love the way this story keeps getting better and better I’m binging this story until it ends and when I get to the end I hope you will write more!!!!!!!!!

I didn't want to read that church bit where he made them confess the horrible things they did. I had a fair idea what they were going to say, but honestly to read it sickened me. I would have personally made them all cut off each other's dicks and eat them, but even then I fear they'd be getting off lightly for the things they did. I mean girls as young as twelve, are you fucking kidding me? That's beyond evil.

I wonder why Greg wastes time being physical with his girls when at this point he can just get them off with his thoughts. I suspect he could do the same to himself. I guess that aspect kind of backfired plot-wise. Though I suppose it could be justified as showing that he truly cares if he's making that extra effort even if it's technically unnecessary to achieve the end result desired.

I feel like he's using his powers a bit much, to the point he's losing himself a bit. It would be more entertaining if he only used them as a fallback. It would be an interesting challenge and is how I would personally try to use such powers. It's more satisfying in the end.

I, hereby, anoint you Queen, Queen of the Run-On Sentence. I thoroughly enjoy your stories, but the lack of an editor makes it harder to read your work than necessary. I rated this chapter a 5⭐️. Please get someone to review your work.

А Барби на самом деле тот ещё тролль)

А часть с церковью к сожалению вполне может оказаться реальностью... Многие люди готовы потеряться в "вере", даже не анализируя свои поступки