All Comments on 'Warm, Sultry, Kiss Pt. 01'

He should get someone else to handle his medical power of attorney!

4

My score dropped to 2*s

It wasn't the best story I've read, but not the worst either. I hope there is at least a part 2 to see where this is going.

I join with the commenters consensus on saying that this is really bad on every level. Anyone seems to get by the mods and post a few paragraphs. Very few can actually write turn those paragraphs into a cohetent story.

U aint gonna die from a colonoscopy, u will feel like shit but no death. U forgot about the clean out the colon drink one gets prior to the procedure that makes u feel like death warmed over then u get the garden hose probe up the ass

And the point is......?

Thanks for posting your first story. It wasn't a bad beginning, but you have some things to work on. First there is a huge difference between telling a STORY and telling the news. This felt more like something from a newspaper than a fictional story.

It lacked the depth of plot and character development. It was too "just the facts" using choppy and awkward sentences. It felt like an article about what they did, rather than a story.

Things happened too quickly and the action-reaction of the characters felt forced and rushed.

Curious to see where it goes.

KB

Yes you need to work on character development and narrative but unlike other commenters I did not think it was terrible. And yes while a colonoscopy won't require the cheating wife to make any difficult medical decisions i thoughg it was an original way to signal just how entertwined people become in a marriage. I could do without the cuck angle but its your story. On to part 2!

Clark and KingB were right. Nice first time try but it needs work. The characters need a little more depth. The colonoscopy angle is not needed. I see you are trying for a cuckold/cheating thing, not really my thing unless the slut gets burned for her infidelity.... How long, why, what friends we're helping her out, we're they involved, is it only Tommy or did she have more than one lover, why didn't Steve notice the drop off in Mary's lack of sexual activity in their marriage. There are a lot of things lacking here but just be more into the " story " telling and develop the story lines... Hopefully you will be better prepared for the next chapter....

WOWEE!

I really liked the beginning!..But pray it doesn't become a Cuckold story!..Those piss Me off no end

5 Stars ★★★★★

I liked it. Despite the other commentators opinions it grabbed and held my attention. I’d like to read more.

Why do so many of LW stories have the husband ask and not the wife? As the aggrieved party, shouldn't it be the wife that asks this?

every women i have known has cheated, if this was a true story she cheated for sure.

i have some good female friends who are married and they cheat or have. Remember

most only last a few minutes. Just remember i told you so.

He got a erection thinking about her cheating?!? Please put a cuckold warning on this type of story unless you plan to have him get a backbone.

The husband is Having a routine colonoscopy, not Open Heart Surgery, why would she have to make life or death decisions, he would be awake and fully aware of what is happening.

Very enjoyable story. Thank you!

And it’s rare indeed to find an erotic story featuring a colonoscopy. J.

Very intriguing start.

Many of these stories struggle with the husband being nonapproving then suddenly liking the cuckolding. We shall see how that progresses

Doctor's Office?

Mqybe where he lives but both of mine were done in the hospital with a full medical crew just in case something did go wrong. When they put you under or into twilight mode there is always a chance of something unexpected happening.

this should be in the cuckold section not loving wives. loving wives who cuckold their husbands must not love their husbands much nor do they respect their husbands much. divorce him and set him free to find a loyal, committed, faithful wife. then the unfaithful woman can have a guilt free life chasing and f...ing whom ever she wants without hurting her naïve, ignorant (of his wife's disloyalty and adulterous behaviour) loving spouse.

I've always wondered why divorce lawyers didn't also perform colonoscopies. I mean, they're completely and invasively up your ass, so why not look around a bit?

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Interesting level of tension. Good, realistic dialogue writing of two miscommunicating spouses.

anybody is better to carry your power of attorney. Hey maybe your future divorce attorney could to it. She is not to be trusted with your welfare let alone your life.

dead man walking

Deception is the end all . If deception can be taken out of the equation . There can be resolve .

WTF was this? Stupid comes to mind!

Did you lose your fucking mind?

WTF?

Que?

Why do so many losers demand such stories have a cuckold warning? What are they so afraid of? Hotwife lifestyle is very common nowadays so get used to it.

⭐⭐

Seriously? That’s what he hits her with right before he trusts her with his life? He’s too stupid to be allowed to reproduce