All Comments on 'Water Park Fun Ch. 02 - The Mall'

waiting to see where this goes, keep up good work

Movies are the best places for indiscreet sex. This brings back some great memories. Well paced and erotically descriptive. Hope you continue with this couples escapades.

Great story i wonder what movie title was.

i quite like this story. I only hope we don't have to wait another year for chapter 3.

However, this is the second story of yours that you've used the word "while" in place of "well" repeatedly and it's distracting.

This is going to by my next story I edit so that I can work on part 3, thank you for pointing that mistake out so I can keep an eye out for it.

Please continue

Have just found this story and enjoyed reading, it hope you are going to continue it soon

Nice last line, we waited almost 2 years to find out!!!

Real good story so far..

Your editor needs someone to follow along behind them to finish the job and make the story look better.

your you're then than wondering wandering poke dots?? polka dots?

Hmm, if she didn't wait so long to begin, they wouldn't have nearly gotten caught in the theatre :p Her teasing is pretty hot so far I just hope she doesn't take it into the too much category. I love these two together so far, they seem rather well matched!