Wedding Day No. 05

What is it about weddings?

I woke as the sheet and bedspread were jerked off of me, well, off of us.

"Who's this, sleeping in my bed," Jerry said, and I felt a flash of fear as he loomed over me, all gym rat muscles and a snarl on his face.

Then a smile split his face, and he laughed, a booming laugh.

"Hey, relax, Phil," he said, laughing, "I don't bite, and nothing on Bambi is likely to wear out."

He turned slightly and held out his hand.

"I bring you breakfast," he said with a flourish, "Come over here Elsie, and get 'em out."

I saw what Bambi meant when she said Jerry was last seen with some "bovine jailbait." The girl, well, the woman although to my eye it seemed barely a woman but, then again, when I see a NASCAR driver being interviewed I'm often thinking, "Christ, that kid doesn't even have a driver's license yet," had huge, truly immense breasts, it was hard not to think of them as udders, and I watched, fascinated, as she pulled her top up and off.

As she followed Jerry's direction to "Get 'em out," she did the crossed-arms-in-front thing that only a woman can pull off and peeled off the T-shirt she wore over her unencumbered breasts. And Jesus, what tits they were. I had no idea what size bra might hold those things. She made Bambi's well-enhanced D cups look small. The hung well down her belly, and oversized areolas with matching oversized nipples were dripping thick white milk.

She smiled, not a happy smile but more a "contented" smile, the smile of someone doing what they love, as she unbuttoned, unzipped, and pushed the jeans she wore down, showing that she had no underwear on the bottom either as she let them fall and stepped out of them. She was fat in the sense that she was soft with a roll of belly hanging slightly, but she was far from obese. Her waist was oddly small in fact, and the dimples at the tops of her ass were delightful. The phrase "muffin top" might have been invented to describe her.

"Up on the bed, girl," Jerry said, slapping her ass hard enough to make her flinch, making a sound loud in the confines of the room, "and feed us men. Bambi, you get breakfast other ways."

Bambi giggled and rolled out of bed, athletic and graceful, and said in a thick, sleepy voice, "I gotta pee first."

Jerry laughed and said, "Shag Phil's lazy ass out of bed and show him how we do that in the morning here in God's Country."

She smiled and stretched, feline in her enjoyment of that movement, and grabbed my wrist and started pulling.

"Come on, Baby," she said, "Nature calls."

I laughed softly, still, I realized, a little drunk and maybe a little high from the cocaine, and squirmed out of bed. She's a strong woman and I didn't want her to pull my damn shoulder out of its socket.

She was about a step ahead of me, still holding my wrist, and when I looked at that well-sculpted, world-class ass I thought the brown circle right where she sits, the residual of our messy anal sex the night before, might be the sexiest single thing I had ever seen. As her ass cheeks rubbed lightly together with each step I could see that the brown circle was dry and crusty. She was leaving a little trail of dry flakes as she walked.

I was surprised when she walked past the toilet and opened the door to a huge shower.

I followed her and looked around the tiled interior.

"Jesus," I said, "I've had bedrooms smaller than this."

When I reached for the faucet handle, though, she slapped my hand.

"Shower later, Phillip," she said, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissing me. The feel of those big, overstuffed tits against my body got to me and I felt a stirring in my one-eyed friend.

"For now," she said, softly, kissing me again as I felt hot urine spatter on my feet.

"Well," I thought, "When in Rome and all that."

This was another first for me, in a weekend full of firsts. I relaxed my control and started peeing myself. The way I was pressed against her, well, the way she was pressed against me, I was peeing up our bodies, wetting our bellies, and running down our legs.

My hands found her ass and my fingertips explored that crusty brown circle, gently spreading her, feeling it still damp where it was protected by her ass cheeks.

"Are you a dirty boy, Phillip?" she asked and I was aware that she had stopped peeing.

"I think I could be," I said, answering her honestly.

"Show me," she said, and her grin was almost feral, "Get on your knees, Baby."

I knew what was coming and moaned a soft, "Oh, God."

Her grin as she looked down at me as I did as she told me and eased to my knees was predatory. She was the wolf among sheep and guess who the sheep was.

"Tell me you want this," she said.

When I didn't answer, her fingers entwined in my hair, twisting, not quite hurting, but controlling. And the grin on her face was a wolf moving in on a rabbit.

"Last chance, Phillip," she said, her voice oddly soft, almost conversational, "Tell me you want this or go back to your hotel room."

I took a deep breath, slowly in through my nose then blown softly out through pursed lips, and surrendered to her.

"I want this," I said.

Her smile changed then. A subtle change, but it was there.

"Open your mouth, sweetheart," she said, her voice gentle, I thought almost loving.

As I opened my mouth her fingers in my hair twisted and pushed, forcing my head back so that I was looking straight up. In a non sequitur of biblical proportions I noticed that the oversized shower had a half dozen heads built into the ceiling.

"God," I thought, "it would be like showering in a warm rain."

The first jet of her urine...

Let me start that again. I'm being far too clinical.

That first sudden gush as she pissed in my mouth surprised me and I coughed, spattering her belly and covering my face and hair, burning my eyes.

It's always a mystery to me how a woman can stop her pee so easily.

"You wasteful boy," she said, the flow stopping and my head snapping to the side as she slapped me.

I blinked hard, trying to clear my eyes, and looked up at her, opening my mouth.

"Please," I said, "I want this." It seemed to be the right thing to say, the thing she wanted to hear.

Okay, I could blame the drugs or the alcohol, but I won't. I've always been, well, fascinated with the kinkier side of sex. I've always been very oral with my lovemaking, and the slight taste of urine when a woman came in my mouth, or the faint scent and taste of an asshole had never bothered me during foreplay. And always, somewhere deep in my psyche, there had been that lingering question - what would it be like to take it further?

So, yes, the alcohol and drugs had something to do with it, but they just allowed me to let my core, okay, I'll use the word, depravity, run free.

What is it about a wedding?

"Please," I said again, "I want this," but I didn't stop at that. My hands ran up the back of her thighs and used my palms, flat on that already crusty circle to spread her cheeks and my fingertips to find that beautiful starburst and lightly touch it, "I want it all."

Her smile was the smile I remembered from my kids when that special present really was under the Christmas Tree.

"Oh, you dirty boy you," she said and her knees flexed slightly and I could feel a change in the tension of her ass where my palms held her open.

I damn near came right then when I felt that sculpted starburst bulge slightly and the first warm, firm, slightly damp tip of her turd touched my fingertips.

Her smile was predatory now, more a snarl than a smile.

"Say please," she said.

"Please," I said.

"No," she said and in an amazing demonstration of muscular control, what I was touching with my fingertips retreated back inside, "Say it like you mean it."

I was lost. I felt something deep inside surrender.

"Please," I said again, putting as much need, as much desperation as I could muster and lightly caressing that sensitive circle, "Please, don't stop."

"Welllllllllllll," she said, that alveolar lateral approximant, the final "L" sound lingering, "since you have been a good boy."

I felt dirty. I felt degraded. I felt debauched. And my goddam cock was as hard as it had ever been as I felt her turd, firm, slightly moist, and surprisingly thick, slowly filling my hand. I was watching her face and her eyes were closed. It was obvious she was getting as much pleasure from this strange, kinky intimacy as I was.

My hands slowly filled and then overflowed as she kept going, obviously not pushing, just letting it slowly push out, her body simply removing what it no longer needed. I heard a soft plopping sound as shit fell from my overfull hands to land on the floor of the shower, spattering the piss already there.

When she was done with that she started peeing into my mouth again, filling it to overflowing before she was finished.

And I loved it. I loved the taste of her. I loved the feel of her hot piss overflowing and spattering onto my face. It was like every dirty fantasy I ever had was being fulfilled in one sudden debauch.

I was swallowing as fast as I could and somewhere in that part of my mind that could still think, I had that strange thought. "This is an intimacy unlike any other."

"You like it, dirty boy?" she asked, her palms on my cheeks, her smile still predatory.

I nodded and my fingers probed deeper, finding that starburst and penetrating a little.

I swallowed and cleared my mouth.

"Thank you," I said.

But she wasn't done.

"Pick it up," she said, her smile a grin now, and all teeth.

It was a big pile, actually. She's a fairly big, healthy woman, and, well, she shit pretty damn big. It took both hands to pick up the pile.

"Smell it," she said, the grin predatory now, her eyes narrowed. I knew she was testing limits and deep in my mind a sane thought popped up - "STOP THIS!"

But I was beyond stopping now. I won't blame it on the alcohol or the drugs. I've always enjoyed pornography and I realized that I was living in a porn story.

I liked it.

Hell, I welcomed it.

So I lifted the pile and brought it almost touching my nose, holding her eyes with mine, as I inhaled deeply. I've never found the smell of shit to be awful, but this was intense, especially as she grinned, that wild grin.

I knew it was coming but I still felt a rush of adrenaline when she said the words.

"Taste it," she said, and there was a coldness in her voice I found frightening.

When I hesitated her fingers in my hair twisted hard enough to make me cry out.

"TAKE A BITE, PHILLIP," she said in a voice so cold it was utterly devoid of any emotion. I could picture Tony Soprano ordering a hit in that voice, "OR I'LL MAKE YOU EAT THE WHOLE FUCKING THING."

I opened my mouth and took a bite. It was still warm, soft, and surprising me, had no taste, well, a faintly salty taste but I suppose that makes sense. Her body had taken all of the good stuff.

I chewed and swallowed and then almost shit myself when I heard Jerry's unmistakable voice say, "What a dirty boy," followed by the unmistakable sound of a cellphone camera making those clicking sounds as the camera worked.

When I tried to turn to look, Bambi's fingers in my hair damn hear tore a handful out she yanked so hard.

"Smile," she said.

I moaned, but smiled, knowing my lips were shit-smeared and my teeth were probably covered.

"Now, Phillip," she said in a strangely conversational tone, "I'm going to release your hair but if you try to look around, Jerry is going to kick your ass, and trust me, Sweety," and she stroked my hair very gently, "he knows how."

Okay, I was scared. So I didn't move when she released me, turned, and spread the cheeks of that sculpted ass.

Again, I suppose I should have seen it coming.

"Lick me clean," she said in the same kind of conversational tone.

So I did. And, I enjoyed doing it.

On some level it was one of those times - if rape is inevitable, relax and enjoy it.

I knew something was going on here that I didn't understand, but there wasn't one goddam thing I could do about it so I just decided to enjoy it.

And I did. I mean, what the fuck. It was a perfect ass and there was that beautiful starburst of her asshole that I cleaned up.

And she obviously enjoyed it too. Soon enough her womanscent overrode the other smells in the room and her thick, sticky, white nectar began flowing.

She came, untouched by anything but my tongue, and her love honey ran in thick sheets down her inner thighs.

In the background, I was aware of the regular clicking of that cellphone camera.

She stood, patted me on the head, said, "Stay," as if I were a poodle, and moved out of my field of view.

And no, I was not surprised when Jerry's cock took the place of her asshole in front of me.

He was big, not huge, but big, and it was obvious what he wanted.

Well, sometimes the obvious is wrong. I opened my mouth, preparing to suck dick for the first time in my life, and he started peeing and the camera started clicking.

My eyes burned, I had been surprised and unable to close them quickly enough, and the smell of night-after piss ws strong. I didn't have to be told, I kept my mouth open.

When the stream finally stopped I opened my eyes and smiled up at him.

"You ARE a natural," he said, shuffling closer.

I had never had a cock in my mouth before, but I had been on the receiving end enough that I understood the technique so I leaned forward, closing the last few inches on my own and taking him into my mouth. I lightly caressed the bottom of his shaft with my tongue and felt him start to respond.

In a morning full of surprises, this was the biggest one.

I enjoyed it.

I liked the way he felt, getting hard in my mouth. I liked the way his breath caught when I reached up with my sticky hands and cupped his hard ass, pulling him to me.

I guess he was both surprised and hair-triggered because I had just got started when I felt the sudden tension and then the hot jet of his ejaculation into my mouth. I swallowed, noisily as he came.

He grunted with his release and after a few seconds pulled away. Bambi moved close, the camera clicking away, catching the thick string of his semen connecting his cock with my lips.

When I started to stand he pushed me back down, waving his forefinger back and forth like a metronome, and said, "Nuh-uh. You still need to take care of Elsie."

I laughed, my surrender complete, and turned and saw her standing there.

"Come here, beautiful," I said.

The camera was clicking away as I latched onto her nipple, her breast, her udder, hanging so low it was right there, and started suckling as I rubbed her back and then her ass, knowing now what was coming. Her piss was hot on my knees as I knelt before her, suckling and playing with her ass, knowing that was coming too, my fingertip finding her tight little asshole and probing, encouraging now.

I was all in, every dirty fantasy fulfilled, and I was kind of wallowing in it.

When I felt her turd start I made no attempt to catch it. I just rubbed it all over her big ass, and and suckled. Her milk was thick and warm and sweet and I was so damn hard I hurt.

She came suddenly, explosively. I thought at first she was peeing again but this was pure womanscent. And it went on.

Finally, spent, she relaxed, hell, she almost collapsed.

Christ, what a mess.

I stood, my hands still covered in shit, and helped Elsie to stand.

"Come on, Sweety," I said, "I've never had a cow before."

On the bed then, Jerry and Bambi watching, the cellphone camera clicking, I got Elsie onto all fours and took her from behind, vaginally.

She mooed softly as I fucked her, and I thought the way her udders leaked, leaving round wet circles on the sheet was sexy.

I came, finally, the ejaculation powerful and satisfying, and laid back on the bed.

"Now," I said, laying back on the pillow, enjoying Elsie's warmth as she snuggled against me, "wanna tell me what this was all about?"

"Control," Jerry said. "We needed to have something on you, Phillip. You're a wild card and our lifestyles] is, well, unconventional."

"Fine," I said, "as long as you understand that if those pictures get out I'll have nothing to lose."

"What do you mean?" Bambi asked.

"I mean exactly what you think I mean," I said, "if those pictures get out I'll be coming for you two, and I'm a very good shot."

She giggled at that and crawled into bed, snuggling on the other side.

"Fair enough," she said softly.

We got my son married off the next day.