We're a Wonderful Wife Ch. 11

We're a Wonderful Wife

Chapter 11

The Grim Christmas

When Karole's ex-fiancé lied to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police (Gendarmerie Royale du Canada GRC) and claimed that he got his meth from a lab in Karole's garage in Greeley, the Mounties contacted the DEA who launched a full-scale investigation. Although they found nothing the investigation put Karole in a bad light and her employer fired her. Unable to get a job in the medical career that she excelled at and burdened with student and medical debt Karole lost everything, her job, her truck, and now it looks like she will lose her house. She was only able to find a job working for a bill collector and she absolutely hates her job, she hates her situation, she's even beginning to hate her daughter. The only thing left in her life that she truly loves is Lanh whom she loves like a sister, and Don whom she loves like a potential lover, and she hates herself even more for that.

______________________________

It was difficult for Don to adjust to not being the bread winner. Academically he remains busy submitting papers and articles on his "Return to the Three Rs" mantra that earned him his degree. He also gets the occasional speaking engagement, but after farming and a decade of military service, it feels like a hobby to him, and it pays about the same as a hobby. Most of his time is spent babysitting Karole's daughter Krissy, which he and Lanh love doing. As for Lanh, her two jobs are demanding, exciting, fulfilling, and everything she could have dreamed of when she decided on a career in speech therapy, but since both jobs are part time jobs she receives no medical coverage nor any other benefits.

Ever since Karole lost her job, life for the four of them had become incredibly difficult. Emotionally Karole was shattered, and that was making it difficult for her to get close as she wanted to get to Krissy. Don and Lanh were there for her at every turn, but ever since the DEA and FBI poked and prodded, her employer Mountain Sports Medicine laid her off "For Cause" and with a black mark like that on her record there was no one in Colorado that would hire her.

Karole fought to keep her head above water financially, but the hits kept coming. First her pickup truck was repossessed, then Krissy got sick and medical bills kept pouring in. Don wanted to hold her and comfort her, but that wasn't his place, so he watched Krissy like a doting stepfather, and he left it up to Lanh and her sisters to cheer Karole. Money was getting tight for Lanh and Don too. Don's disability pay was based on last year's cost of living index, not this year's, and his military retirement isn't what a civilian would make in the same position, not by a longshot. Then, like all disabled veterans, to maintain his social security disability income he was forced onto Medicare which added a monthly bill they didn't need and could barely afford because Lanh's hours at the clinic were cut which hurt immensely.

Karole finally got a job at Torgeson and Briggs Financial Consulting, which sounded impressive, but in reality it was merely a bill collection agency. Her job entailed calling people and harassing them to pay up immediately. She hated her job, she hated herself, sometimes she even hated Krissy, and to make matters worse the only person she truly loved was married to her best friend, which made her hate herself even more.

They only got to go to Minnesota once this year, for the Independence Day weekend and Karole spent every moment she could working at Nguyen Pho. Rosa, the manager, finally demanded, "You drove all the way up here from Colorado to wait tables?"

"Hell yeah, I make some pretty good tips here," she took Rosa aside and said, "I'm goin' broke down there, I need every dime I can get."

"Why don't you just move here? We have room for you here, and there's plenty of room out at the farm." Rosa held Karole's hands and said, "Mai and Duong are moving out, Bao and I are going to move into the main bedroom, you can have our room."

"That sounds awesome but right now I can't, I can't just pack up and abandon my house," but it wasn't her house that she couldn't bear parting with.

Later that day she and Kim-ly had a spat over some dumb thing, neither can remember what it was that set off the squabble, but it was getting pretty heated. Don and Lanh scooped up the babies, Krissy and Dahn, and vacated the area because their mothers' anger was making them upset. Sandy, Don's stepmother, stepped out of the farmhouse and said, "That's it, I'm tired of it. I've had it with you two children. Both of you get in the truck... NOW LADIES!"

Sandy was a firm believer in settling arguments before they became a habit, and she had a sure-fire way to solve the problem, a stretch of the leg. She drove them five miles out on county highway 10, then kicked them out of the truck. "Walk home!" she demanded and sped off. So, while Don and Lanh watched Danh and Krissy, Kim-ly and Karole walked home while Sandy monitored their progress at a distance in airconditioned comfort.

The first mile was walked in sullen silence, the second mile was filled with anger and accusations, Kim-ly had seen Karole mooning over Don, and Karole had seen the same in Kim-ly and it almost came to blows when Kim-ly shouted, "You can't steal Don from my sister!"

"Why? Because you're going to get him first?"

"I'm not after Don! He is Lanh's husband!"

"YOU HAD HIS BABY! WHAT'S NEXT?" shrieked Karole.

"You BITCH! What the hell happened to you? We were so close!"

"Oh, I don't know, lost my job, lost my truck, up to my eyeballs in debt, and the only job I can get is a fuckin bill collector."

The third mile was filled with questions and memories, the fourth mile was all apologies and tears, and the last mile was full of friendship and the kind of secrets that husbands, boyfriends, brothers, and others wouldn't believe that the woman in their life would share with other women. It was when Sandy saw the transformation from anger to laughter that she pulled up close and said, "Ok you two, hop in," then drove into town for ice cream. "That was a cool trick mom," said Kim-ly between licks of her ice cream. "Did you learn that from your mom?"

"Actually, I learned it from Don's grandmother," said Sandy as she licked her own cone.

"Hilde?!?" gasped Kim-ly.

Completely out of the loop Karole asked, "Who's Hilde?"

"You may have seen her in a movie," said Kim-ly, she screwed up her voice to sound like a crone and said, "I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!"

"Don't let your sister hear you say that about her favorite grandmother-in-law," scolded Sandy. After Lanh learned more about Don's Grandma Hilde, they became close and spent a lot of time together when Don was in Germany, and she was waiting for her flight over. Sandy continued, "My mother wasn't interested in raising me... my upbringing was a bit like Karole's. I found myself stuck in a house with four girls ripping each other's hair out and Tom was down in Mankato for work, Don's mom came over and helped me. While she helped me around the house, she told me how her mom handled problems with her seven kids."

"You made your girls walk five miles like you did us?" said Kim-ly. She was teasing of course.

Sandy just looked at her and smiled, "You may notice that three of my girls held state track records."

"Damn!" gasped Kim-ly, "you are hard core!" causing Karole to snicker.

Sandy raised four rambunctious daughters; she knows how to handle two more, a five mile stretch of the leg works wonders. And it was then that Kim-ly and Karole became telling-secrets-at-the-table close once again, and it helped a lot in other ways. Karole fell in love with Krissy again, now that she faced her jealousy that Kim-ly had Don's baby, a jealousy she didn't realize that she had.

One afternoon Kim-ly and Karole ended up at the campsite overlooking the pond, sunning themselves and letting the babies roll around on the blanket. In the pond Don was swimming while Lanh stood in the rowboat coaching him in her squeaky little voice. "You're jealous of her, aren't you?" asked Kim-ly.

Karole raised up on her elbows and looked at the two splashing in the pond. Now Lanh tried to dive on to Don but as she leapt the boat slid out from under her and she smacked down flat on the water. "Not after that dive," said Karole.

"Don't be jealous. They were made for each other. They're like diamonds in the rough that polished each other."

Karole looked at Kim-ly like she was diseased. "That is the worst metaphor I've ever heard. That's not how diamonds work."

"I know, but I can't find a metaphor that describes them properly. It's like..." Kim-ly struggled with a proper description but words are not her strong suit, being an accountant she's all about numbers.

"Like steel sharpens steel?" suggested Karole.

"Not exactly, when you separate them, you would have two sharp pieces of steel. It's just... when you separate them, you have to keep them busy, or they'll just sit there and mope. If Don's not watching Krissy when Lanh's at work, there's no fire, he's not Don anymore, he's..."

Just then Lanh started talking very excitedly about something, but they couldn't make out the words. She wriggled back into the rowboat and started rowing for shore as fast as she could with Don hanging on to the stern. "Watch Krissy, I'm going to see what is going on," and Karole sprinted down to the end of the pond where Lanh was pulling up to the dock. "Is everything ok?"

"I just over did it some," said Don as he gasped for air. Lanh hopped out of the boat and splashed to the stern to help Don get up on his feet.

"That's a bit more than just overdoing it some, are you seeing someone?" asked Karole as she helped Lanh assist Don to shore.

"We were seeing Dr. Andi Roberts over at University hospital," said Lanh, "but she up and left practice."

Don gasped as he tried to get his blood/oxygen levels up, finally he was able to say, "She went on vacation and didn't come back..."

"It happens," said Karole as they eased Don to the ground where his breathing slowly returned to normal. "Sometimes it's too much, and sometimes a new challenge comes along." And sometimes you just get screwed she added wordlessly.

Once Don's blood oxygen level got under control, he and Lanh walked back to the house slowly and once there Kim-ly insisted that he lay down in her room. Don didn't argue and he lay down, Kim-ly and Karole stepped into the room with Danh and Krissy in their arms and placed the babies in bed with Don and immediately both babies started demanding attention.

"Do you want me to take Krissy?" asked Karole.

"No, I can settle her down pretty easy, Danh will learn from her," said Don as he rubbed Krissy's tummy.

"Suit yourself," and Karole joined Kim-ly and Lanh in the room outside of the bedroom.

"I don't know if Ralph told you guys yet," said Kim-ly, "but he's planning to retire as soon as you guys move back."

"We can't run a farm," said Lanh, "Don is going to be going to the Mayo, I can't deal with this farm all by myself..." Lanh was really starting to panic.

"I'll still be here for you," said Kim-ly.

"I'll be here too," said Karole.

"And this new guy that Ralph hired, RJ, he's really good!" Kim-ly elbowed Karole and gave her a saucy wink, "and he's hot. That's the most important part of farmin'!"

"Can he manage the dairy herd?" asked Karole. She is starting to take an interest in the management of the farm, she wants to be involved with it if she moves here.

"Hell yeah!" Kim-ly looked around to see if she was being overheard, "Probably better than Ralph... By the way... where did Tôm (shrimp) go?"

"Lanh? She went in to look in on Don."

Kim-ly got up and turned to the bedroom. "I was going to ask her if I should start moving out of her room... aww." Kim-ly and Karole peeked in on Don and found that he and Lanh were sleeping with the babies nestled between them, Don and Lanh had fallen asleep holding hands.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Autumn in Colorado was as gloomy as their spring, Don was aching to see Danh, so Kim-ly had brought him out for some daddy time. Karole was knocking herself out to get her life back on track, and Lanh was trying to make both of them happy and failing miserably because other than send Don back to Minnesota there was nothing she could do. "I can get you tickets right now," said Lanh. "You can be back there with Danh in two days."

"No. I can't do it. I got responsibilities here." But Don wouldn't meet her gaze.

"What is it? There's something you're not telling me." Lanh looked both angry and hurt and when Don refused to speak, she looked even more hurt. "So, we're keeping secrets from each other now?"

Now Don was in agony, he couldn't say it because it sounded so stupid to him, but he decided to give it a go. "I can't sleep away from you... I have these dreams... they're horrible... and they don't feel like dreams, they feel like a memory, dreams are fluid, but these don't change at all."

"But when I'm with you, it doesn't happen?" she asked.

"No, I sleep fine."

"What are you going to do next week when I'm in Colorado Springs for three days?"

Don felt a sudden wave of nausea wash over him, that conference! He knew it was coming but he didn't realize it was next week! "I... I...I'll just have to tough my way through it." He hoped his internal panic didn't show, but this was the longest they've been apart since Danh was born, and only the second time since his TDY to Saudi Arabia where he was so horribly injured. That's it! That has to be it!

"What?" said Lanh, "You're smiling."

"I figured it out," he smiled. Prodded on by her impatient hand gestures he explained, "The last time we were separated for any length of time was in Saudi Arabia, and that ended badly for us, right? It's got to be my mind reliving that trauma."

He's wrong thought Lanh, he forgot all of that recovery and therapy time in Grand Forks while she was living on the farm. "What did your VA shrink say?" asked Lanh forgetting how sore a subject that was with Don.

"This started long after the VA decided that I wasn't crazy enough to rate a shrink."

"Sorry, I forgot..." she picked up her phone and hit a number on speed dial, "Let's try the phone a friend option." Don fumbled for an excuse to get her to hang up but soon Tam's voice came on the speaker. "Doctor Nguyen...."

"I thought you were Doctor Johnson," said Don.

"Oh it's you. No, Jake is Doctor Johnson, the name was taken." Tam shook her head; Don stopped using that jab a long time ago, he knows that she used her maiden name for her professional title, but then he sounded a bit confused.

"Momma, do you have anyone or know anyone that is doing a study on recurring nightmares?" asked Lanh.

Tam's heart sank, Lanh only calls her momma when she's in trouble, the last time was when she was feeling tremendous guilt when Kim-ly turned up pregnant against all odds. Tam tried to make it clear that she knew what Lanh was asking about, "Yes, one of our people is considering doing a study on PTSD and recurring dreams... do you have someone in mind for the study?"

"Yes, I do."

Oh, those poor kids, Tam groaned inwardly. It's been over a decade since they were teenagers stumbling around with their first real feelings of love and turning to her for advice, and Tam considers herself the most fucked up example of emotional instability known to man. She majored in psychology to figure out what was going on inside her own head. As for Don and Lanh, she still calls them kids even though they've been facing nightmares that would destroy most couples and coming through them still madly in love. "Ok, I'll send you a zoom invite, forward it to your volunteer."

Lanh checked her inbox and read the invitation then said, "Can you do it sooner?"

"That's the soonest I have."

A week later Tam logged into Zoom and saw a very exhausted looking Don looking back at her. "You're family, you know I can't treat you."

"I know that, but I just have to talk to somebody." Don picked up a glass of water to take a drink and his hand was clearly shaking. "You know how details of a dream fade the minute you wake up?" When Tam nodded, he continued, "Check your email, I just sent you the details of a dream I had Tuesday night. I typed up the details about fifteen minutes ago."

Tam saw that Don sent her a long email which she printed up and sat down and started to read. "Oh my God," she muttered, "You remembered all this?"

"I still remember," Don looked dazed, like he was just pummeled. "I thought I had it figured out, I thought my mind was reliving the trauma of Saudi Arabia..." Don paused as the memory of his horrific injuries overwhelmed him. "I don't know what to think... I don't know if I'm capable of thinking..."

"You remember seeing this?" Tam was aghast as she read through the details of his dream. In his dream he had seen the damage done to Lanh when she was run over by a vehicle of some sort. He didn't know when or where, but he saw her body and described in detail the horrific, massive injuries that killed her little sister in his dream.

"I still remember every moment, every detail. This isn't the first time, it's like I'm being taunted by this dream."

"What did you dream of last night?" Tam asked, dreading to hear more grotesque details of Lanh's death in his dreams.

"I didn't sleep last night," said Don sadly. "The follow-ups are worse than the first dream."

"What do you mean? Follow-ups? First dream?" Tam was confused.

"These dreams come in pairs; I get the bad one then the awful one."

Tam could see that Don was hiding something. She looked through the pages of printed horror and said, "I don't see any mention to 'the awful one,' except here it says, "The other one, Kim-ly," what does that mean?"

"The other one means... the other dream..." he paused; he just couldn't say it.

"You saw Kim-ly dead?"

"No, I uhhh..." finally the damn broke, "I've never touched another woman! I've never even wanted another woman! It could never happen..." his voice started to break, and he began a painful internal struggle.

"You had sex with Kim-ly?" Tam asked. "I mean in your dream." Don looked away from the laptop camera and nodded his head. "Things like that happen in dreams; the dream isn't saying this is what you want, it's putting memories together. You were her birth coach, and everything was on display... she gave birth to your son... your mind will take those images and put them into a dream..."

"It's not a dream," insisted Don, "it's a memory of events that haven't happened yet. And it's not always Kim-ly, when it's not her it's Karole." He squeezed his eyes closed tight as if to squeeze out the memory.

"Ok, we need to calm down. You're getting pretty worked up." Tam's never seen him this worked up, he was breathing heavily and looking about him as if looking for a route to use to exit. "Where's Krissy?"

"She's asleep in a crib over here," Don turned the laptop to reveal a bassinette not far from him. He calmed down a bit when he concentrated on Krissy, so he could gather his thoughts. "I'm becoming paranoid, when Lanh is here, I can't fall asleep before she gets in bed, I'll be in a memory... dream... whatever, but I'll be in one so quickly, so I wait for her to go to bed. When we sleep together the memories fade to the back, they're always there, but I can live a normal life, but when she's gone, it's hell. Bad hell."

"What do you think these dreams want?"

"I don't know, it seems to me like somebody wants Lanh dead so Karole or Kim-ly can take me." Don looked around nervously, looking to see if someone besides Tam was listening. "It won't do them any good," he said furtively.