All Comments on 'What a Mistletoe Can Do'

Loved the story - although it was a little disjointed at times. There were some egregious spelling errors and misuse of words like "shutter" instead of the proper word "shudder". Get an editor to review your work before you submit and your ratings will go up and up.

I gave you five stars even though I basically agree with the first comment. I'd add that third person instead of first might have worked better, but I liked the story a lot. Laila is a very attractive character.

I have to agree with the past two reviewers. This was a really well executed story with just a few flaws which did not draw me too far out of the experience. The spellings were pretty minor and as a mainly phonetic reader they didn't irk me too much. There were a couple of rushed bits and sudden jumps but that's pretty much the genre. I have to disagree with the second reviewer as I think first person was a fine stylistic choice and more power to ya for it.

MMM. I can't...stop...drooling...Addy needs to come see me!

Hey! This was supposed to be inside of the notes also, but I did not write this story. I have a curious friend who writes her own erotic stories as a hobby on the side (same genre as mine) and wanted to see what it was like to have a literotica story up; she has been wondering whether she should put her stories online. Anyways, she didn't bother going through the trouble of making an account, so I allowed her to use mine for this story. But all credit goes to her, she would greatly appreciate the comments and tips. I will pass on everything you guys say to her. Hopefully this will motivate her to start her own account on here and get to typing!

But on a different note, I will try to enter a winter holiday contest of my own. If anyone has any ideas for any stories they would like to see or want to give me a challenge, message me! Thanks so much for reading her work.

The story was well written. I am in agreement with the other comment there were spelling errors but other than that she tells a steamy tale. I hope to read more from her.

Amazing story. If she decides to make an account please let me know so I can add her to my faves.

Has a Great Story and should consider following-up

this piece and let everyone know how they makeout.

Stay together allow others to keep them apart or?

Although I like the premise of the story, I have to be honest with you: the grammatical errors, misuse of words, typos, and just lack of structure made it difficult for me to get through it. Whether or not it is yours or you submitted it for someone else, if you're going to publish, please check the work. A teacher with a red pencil could have a field day with this submission.

Somewhat true, but it was not my story. It was put up mostly for curiosity and critiques. It's not my job to edit and rewrite her story when she didn't ask me to. She did what she wanted when it came to putting it up on here and she knew the consequences. Her knowing from someone other than myself that "a teacher would have a field day" is something that she needed to hear. We didn't put her story up for the heck of it. Essentially, I am not responsible for her editing mistakes, she is. She is not a professional writer like most are on here, it's a hobby of hers that she writes in a journal so the mistakes are more probable. She initially never wrote them for the intentions of people reading them. If it's not my story then...it's just not my story. I just provided the opportunity. But, like I said, she needs the input so I will tell her your opinion.

hot as they realized the feelings that they had for each other. She can never say that she was ever cold again after an avalanche :>)

So you left us hanging but this is a good story.