- Loving Wives
- Wife Takes Charge Ch. 01
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Click hereIt had been a long day at work and I arrived home late as usual. His wife Anna was just finishing dinner as he walked in. She was wearing her usual short shorts and bralette around the house. Now Anna was as stunning as the day they first met. 5' 6" with a small frame she had piercing blue eyes and a tight little body. Her perfect B cup breast with perky nipples and long tan legs that ran up to her tight ass that hung just out of her shorts.
Anna had a certain glow about her tonight that made my heart skip a beat. Granted it had been about two weeks since they were last intimate with each other he never got his hopes up anymore. Anna did not have the desire she had when they first met 9 years ago, but I still had a very high sex drive. This tended to cause fights every so often between us. As we ate dinner Anna told me she finally got her package in the mail and she had a surprise for me after dinner.
After we finished dinner, she let me to the bedroom and started kissing on my neck and ear which she knows drives me wild. She told me it was her turn to please me tonight and she had a surprise for me. I was over the moon excited about this. Now Anna was not one to ever start the sex nor did she ever take the lead she would just follow. However, tonight she had a different fire in her eye and it was amazing to see her so happy to take the lead.
She had me next to the bed and had me strip naked while she was still clothed and told me to lay on my back on the bed. She then pulled out a blind fold and a pair of wrist restraints. This was new and something we had never done previously. After she had the mast secured and my wrist above my head, I could hear her foot steps retreat to the master bathroom. What was I supposed to do? It was a bit chilly as I could feel the ceiling fan pushing air across my naked body as I laid on the bed.
I hear her foot steps return to my side of the bed and my mind raced to what she would do next. I felt her kiss my lips and work her way down to my neck. She took her time with each kiss making me wonder where her lips would land next on my body. Next a nipple then my ribs before returning to my other nipple. She made her way down to my inner thighs and then took me into her mouth. Anna was an excellent oral artist, but she rarely gave me head anymore and I could not even remember the last time she had done this for me.
Next, I felt an odd sensation it was wet and a bit cold. I could feel it running from the base of my shaft and over my balls. It took me a minute to realize it was lube and a lot of it at that. So much that it was running over my balls and in between my cheeks. She was still sucking on my head as she rubbed slowly up and down my shaft. Then she stopped and I felt something rubber on the head of my shaft. This was odd since we do not use condoms, but then it slid to the base of my shaft. I recognized it as a cock ring, but we never use those either since she already complains that I last too long during sex.
Next, she coupled my balls and was playing with them in her hands and the real shock happened. I could feel her stretching a second rubber ring around my balls and slide it to the base of my sack. It was tight but not uncomfortable and I did not know what to think of this new sensation. She then straddled my chest and I could feel her perky nipples on my stomach. She still had some lacy panties on because I could feel them on my nose. I could smell her amazing scent, but could not taste her which was killing me.
She took me back into her mouth and was slowly stroking me as she pushed my legs apart. I tensed up when I felt something attached to the other two rings move and she was holding onto it. I felt something new something odd that did not belong between my cheeks. She told me to relax as she slowly slid something into my virgin ass. It was odd and different, but not painful. She proceeded to slowly insert something small and curved into me and once it slipped in, I was harder than I ever had been in my life.
She stopped sucking on me and got off of me. Still not being able to see I could hear the sound of her taking her lacy panties off. I felt as she got onto the bed and then straddled me. She grinded on my shaft, but did not put me inside her yet she was slowly teasing me as I lay there. I felt her hips rise slightly and she took ahold of me as I felt the moist warmth of her lips on my head. Just as the tips started to slide into her, she hit a button that made whatever she put into my ass start to vibrate.
I immediately tensed up again as the toy vibrated against my prostate. She took me to the hilt as she felt me stiffen. She slowly dragged her fingernails from my lips down to my chest and across my nipples. She told me that I was to make her cum and no matter how good it felt that she was going to cum first. I could not see her nor touch her she was in total control. She started to rock her hips slowly rising and falling my entire length. It did not take long before I tensed up and she could tell I was about to cum.
She quickly pulled off of me and turned the vibrator off. "Don't you dare cum yet" is all I heard. Then she turned the venerator back on an intense pulse, but she was not touching me at all. I was at her mercy and I need to explode. She turned it off again as she got back on top of me. She rode me fast and hard the way that makes her cum quick. It was not long before she let out a loud moan and screamed "FUCK ME" and I knew this meant she was there. She picked up her pace and switched the vibrator to high and screamed "FILL ME WITH YOUR CUM" and that was all I needed to hear. I don't think I have ever cum that hard in my life. I think I came for two minutes straight before she collapsed on my chest.
She removed my blind fold and kissed me deeply. She asked me how I liked her surprise and I told her it was amazing and I loved it and her. It meant so much to me that she was willing to go outside the box and try something next. Was this the start of her taking control in the bedroom? Where would she take it next?
- COMMENTS
26thNCover 4 years agoKentuckysub is tired of people who dare to disagree with his perverse out look on life and trashy, less than erotic fiction. Cucks are so defensive, must be the shame about what the really are.
Anonymousover 4 years agoIt takes two people to keep the sex hot and interesting. She got the best of him I think . He wanted sex and she gave it to him . Loved it
Anonymousover 4 years agoI don’t know about control or anything up my ass other than her licking it but hot story. . Every couple should fuck and do different thing to keep there sex life interesting ,
Anonymousover 4 years agoIt may seem odd in this forum (after all, it's not English Composition 101) to comment particularly on a writer's competence with the technical aspects of writing. Shouldn't comments be about the erotic detail and value of a story??? Well, yes . . . but . . . Many readers appreciate that the really good, the engaging and captivating, stories pay careful attention to both. I make my point by inviting attention to the writers who routinely merit scores above 4, usually above an average of 4.5. Such works are characterized by careful attention to technical details (viz., grammar, punctuation, tense and voice, and, of course, proof reading, etc.) AS WELL AS a plot that is engaging in erotic detail, both overt and implied into which most readers can insert themselves in some way.
So please honor your readers and your own pride of authorship in working on those technical details of writing. KingBandor's detailed suggestions are excellent and worthy of close study. Your work here contains the suggestion that you can work on the erotica and produce a work that will fit right in with some of the better authors available on this site. Many thanks.
sbrooks103xover 4 years agoYour advice Re: POV is good, except that you got yourself confused, and after the first two examples you flip-flopped which was 1st and which was 3rd.
Anonymousover 4 years agoAt least have the smarts and do the readers the courtesy of posting this garbage in BDSM or FETISH. His wife abuses him and he divorces the slut. End of the nonsense. Badly written drivel. Get an editor if you insist on continuing. Your POV and lack of technical skills are horrible.
1 star
KingBandorover 4 years agoMaybe English is not your first language. I don't think that has anything to do with it, because you don't switch POV mid-sentence in other languages either. But, I am trying to help you.
You wrote:
"It had been a long day at work and I arrived home late as usual."
That sentence is fine. It is written in first person POV ( point of view) also called voice or perspective. In 1st person POV, the narrator is the main character (usually, but sometimes a secondary character) who is recanting his or her knowledge and experiences. It uses prounouns like I, me and us.
1st person POV is popular among new writers, because it feels natural. However, it is much harder to do well than 3rd person, because the things the narrator can talk about are only the things he/she personally knows, sees, hears, experiences, etc.
2nd Person POV are stories that are really written in 1st person, but are directed to the reader, who becomes a character in the story. These types of stories use pronouns like you, we and us. eg. You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht.
2nd person has similar limitations to 1st person, but is viewed by most readers (google it) as being less enjoyable to read.
Third person POV is the most common POV used. It is told by a generic narrator who can do some pretty cool things. Since the narrator is not a character, the narrator can know everything and can explain things like thoughts and feelings of characters. It is typically the easiest to write and can be as immersive as 1st person if done well. It she's pronouns like he, she, they, and them.
With 3rd person, you can have a fixed focus (ie focusing on one characters POV at a time) as in George Martin's Song of Ice and Fire series) or open focus where the POV is not bound to any one character.
When you pick a POV you keep it and use it for the entire story, or have clearly defined boundaries where POV can change, like acts, chapters or scenes (though this is usually a disaster).
The very next sentence:
"His wife Anna was just finishing dinner as he walked in."
Since you wrote the previous sentence as 1st Person, the reader is expecting it to continue. You shifted to 3rd person. So, the reader's reaction is to ask "Who is he? is someone else in the room talking about Anna and her husband?"
That could be a cool trick to play on a reader where it takes them time to figure out what is going on. But, in this case it is only 2 people. This causes confusion and takes people out of the immersive "story mode" and into analytical mode.
Then next paragraph you continue in 3rd person:
"Anna had a certain glow about her tonight that made my heart skip a beat."
Only to shift back in the next one:
"Granted it had been about two weeks since they were last intimate with each other he never got his hopes up anymore."
Then, right back to 1st:
"Anna did not have the desire she had when they first met 9 years ago, but I still had a very high sex drive. This tended to cause fights every so often between us."
This is just wrong and makes your stories lose points. If you solve this, I am sure your scores will improve. Always remember who is telling the story and keep it that way.
Only change POV if you have a compelling reason to do so, but only do it at major story breaks, not paragraph to paragraph or sentence to sentence.
Hope that helps,
KB
KentuckySubover 4 years agoTo whichever Anonymous...
I couldn't care less about the anal play in the story. I care even less about your dislikes. I'm tired of the self-righteous Anonymouses who want to police every story I'm the Living Wife category because it doesn't feature a wife fawning all over her recency husband. I'm also tired of the violent comebacks directed toward those who offend these same Anonymouses, and the constant use of derogatory terms that denigrate gay sex. Damn, dude. It's 2019. Women aren't here to serve you, and no gay man is gonna molest you. Don't like the stories? Either write your own or stop reading.
hotprof1973over 4 years agoAs with your other story, the point of view is inconsistent. It either shifts erratically, or (as in your other offering) the first person narrator is proving information that they didn't know. Whether first person or third person, the narrator has to be treated as a character in the story. Like other characters, you have to give characteristics to the narrator by how they're giving information to your readers.
