Women's Studies Ch. 11

"I assumed it was supposed to be a surprise," Abigail shrugged.

"Trust me, there will be enough surprises on this date. The last thing we needed was more," I said.

"So, you're really going to tell him then?" Abigail shouted, her words ringing out as Kennedy shut off the hair dryer.

"That's the plan," I sighed.

Abigail was finished. I didn't know how she did it, but those loose, casual looking curls of blonde and black hair perfectly framed my face giving me an elegant look. I hadn't been expecting very much with my hair style, but this was something else.

We had started getting me ready three hours before Danny was supposed to pick me up, and now, thirty minutes before seven o' clock I was finally able to sit and take a breather.

"You should go just like this," Kennedy said smiling at me from her place on our bed. "Forget the dress."

I wasn't sure I could do that. Abigail wanted to make it up to me for her deception, so she was letting me wear her dress again. The dress. The red silk one with the black coral beading that swirled down from the bust. She knew exactly how that dress made me feel the last time, and after Danny told her I should dress fancy, she immediately thought of me wearing it for him.

Not wanting to wrinkle it in any way, I had postponed donning it until the last minute. Currently I was completely topless, only wearing black silk stockings with a garter to hold them up, a pair of lacy black panties showcasing my perky ass, and my Christian Louboutin heels courtesy of Abigail.

"While I'm sure he would enjoy the sight," I began, "It will be hard enough keeping warm in my dress as it is."

"If things go really well, you won't need the dress to keep warm," Kennedy shot back as she quickly ducked out into the common room for a moment.

"Do you really think you'll sleep with him?" Abigail asked quietly as soon as the door shut behind Kennedy.

"Maybe," I blushed a little. I may not have been a stranger to anal play, but admitting that I was more than ready to sleep with a guy still rubbed up against my emerging feminine modesty. And there was no way that my obvious deflection was anything but a flat-out confession in her eyes.

I didn't know what I expected from Abigail, but the amount of blushing and avoidance of eye contact wasn't on the list. "What's it like?" she asked. "You know, having something in there?"

I was a little taken aback that she wanted to know, but I guess it was only natural. When Abigail lost her virginity to me, her and Kennedy talked about it all in incredible detail, comparing notes. I decided to tell her the unvarnished truth.

"I thought it would be disgusting and horrible," I admitted. "And it did hurt a little the first time, but there was so much more," I smiled, recalling the sensations. "It was so dirty, but in a hot way, and feeling him so hard inside of me...it was incredible, but it wasn't the best part. With every thrust, I felt something building inside of me, something powerful. It swelled and pulsed, and filled me up until I couldn't take any more, and then it filled me some more. When I finally came, it was like an explosion ripping through my body and waves of pleasure crashing down on me at the same time. It was the single best thing I've ever felt," I smiled thinking about it.

Abigail was panting slightly from my recitation as Kennedy burst back into the room.

"Just in case," she said holding up the square package of a condom.

"Kennedy!" Abigail exclaimed.

"Like we all haven't been thinking about it," she scoffed. "Besides, Skylar's got a ton of them. She won't miss it, and better safe than sorry," she finished as she tucked it into my small clutch.

Just then my phone began to beep and buzz on the vanity and I hopped up to check it. "He's early!" I nearly squealed, seeing his message on my phone that he was already downstairs.

All three of us quickly jumped into action. Abigail held my gown open and Kennedy gave me a steadying hand as I stepped into the back of the dress. Abigail was very gentle, working around my hair as she fastened the halter-top while Kennedy smoothed and straightened my skirts. Looking down and seeing my bright red toenail polish peeking out from my open toed heels, I was glad Kennedy talked me into painting them as well.

"I think we're all set," Abigail said taking a step back to look me over. "Oh! Umm."

"What?" I asked, worried. "What's wrong?"

"It's... nothing," Kennedy tried to assure me.

"Kennedy!" Abigail admonished. Then in a more gentle tone she addressed me. "We have a slight...wardrobe malfunction."

"Did it rip?" I asked, scared for the beautiful dress.

"Well...no," Abigail tried again.

"What she's trying to say is you have slightly more boobs than the last time," Kennedy said.

"What?" I asked, twisting by the mirror.

Kennedy wasn't lying. You could clearly see the round curve of my breasts coming out the sides of the dress. The way the halter slowly curved as it ran down my side to my lower back left very little forgiveness for boob size. I had never even thought to try it on again to check the fit. My change in breast size never factored into any of my thoughts for this date.

"Let me see if I have something else you can wear," Abigail said rushing to her closet.

"Leave it," Kennedy said, letting the back of her fingers brush against my exposed flesh, sending small chills through me. "A little side boob action never hurt anyone." Then to me, "Are you ready?"

I swallowed nervously as I nodded my head and she handed me a small black clutch with my things in it. I was embarrassed by how my breasts were exposed, but really, in the grand scheme of things, my breasts weren't that big of a deal right now.

"You're going to be great," Abigail said reassuringly as her and Kennedy walked me down to meet Danny. "Deep breaths."

"If anything goes wrong, call us and we'll be there in a flash," Kennedy whispered from my other side.

"Nothing is going to go wrong!" Abigail said shooting a fierce look at Kennedy across me.

I felt so over done for a simple Valentine's date. I received a lot of looks from girls as we walked the halls and they took in my rich, elegant gown. Surprisingly, none of them batted an eye at my side boob, and most of them even seemed friendly. It was a nice change from our pre-Christmas, near-social exile.

Not feeling so judged, I began to feel more relaxed.

That all changed the moment we reached the wide staircase leading down to the ground floor. The moment we turned the corner I caught a glimpse of him through the banister and my heart floated up as if gravity had abandoned it.

Danny stood in the middle of the foyer in a black and white tux, complete with bow tie and cummerbund. I had seen him dressed nicely before, in dark jeans and button up shirt, but this look was something new altogether. His dark brown hair was neatly combed, and even his eyes seemed to sparkle.

The way he stood, with his hands clasped behind his back, left him looking strong and resplendent. I had never before thought that a man could look beautiful, but if any man ever did, it was Danny, here and now.

"You look..." he began as I made the last few steps down the stairs. "Wow!" he finished, slightly shaking his head as his eyes drank me in.

"Thank you," I blushed after a gently reminding prod from Abigail beside me. "You look beautiful too. Handsome...I meant handsome!"

"From you, I'll take whatever I can get," he smiled before revealing the bouquet of dark red roses behind his back. "These are for you."

"They're lovely," I said, accepting them and pressing them to my nose to take in their scent.

We spent a few moments awkwardly staring into each other's eyes before Kennedy broke our little trance.

"Well, we just wanted to see Lexi off," Kennedy said.

"Oh...Uh...It's nice to see you again Kennedy... Abigail," he said remembering his manners, or just that anyone else existed around us. I didn't fault him; I was having the same problem.

"You two have a good night," Abigail smiled, slightly tugging Kennedy back up the stairs with her.

"Are you ready?" Danny asked holding out his arm.

"As I'll ever be," I smiled nervously, letting my arm slip into his.

The walk back to his car was silent except for the distinct click of my heels on the pavement beneath us.

"Is this your car!" I asked when he led me towards a shiny black muscle car.

"Yeah," he said a little surprised. "You like it?"

"Is this a 74' Skylark?" I asked admiring how pristine it looked.

"It's a 72' actually," he said looking a little relieved. "I was worried that my car would spoil the image of our fancy evening. I almost borrowed my aunts Lexus."

"This is way better than any Lexus," I smiled.

Like the gentleman he was, he opened the door for me. Thankfully I had already had some practice in this dress and I carefully sat on the seat and twisted into the car, minding my skirts in the process. As I leaned back in the seat, I was once again reminded of my fully exposed back as the cool fabric sent a chill through my skin.

After closing the door for me, Danny raced to the other side of the car and hopped in. As the engine came to life, another set of thrills swept through me as I felt and heard the low throaty rumble from the eight-cylinder engine.

"So, what do you have planned for tonight?" I asked once we began moving.

"Are you sure you wouldn't prefer it to be a surprise?" he asked, giving me one of his charming smirks.

I couldn't help but blush under his eyes. To distract myself from the overwhelming feelings I was having, I began fiddling with the flowers in my lap. I had never been given flowers before, and as a boy I found them tacky and cliché. As Lexi, something in me melted at the thought of a guy giving me something so delicate and beautiful.

"Can I at least get a hint?" I asked.

He paused for a long moment before responding.

"There will be dancing," he said a little too carefully.

During our drive we listened to the faint music coming from the radio, and talked about our lives. I knew Danny was going to school for engineering, but he had never really told me where that decision had come from. For that matter, I didn't know very much about him at all really. I knew how he made me feel, and I knew how kind and passionate he could be. Most of the things we had talked about on the phone had been about our daily lives. Somehow, we had never gotten into the deep personal stuff.

"Well, once I learned what a screwdriver was, it was pretty much downhill from there," Danny said as he drove. "I took apart anything I could get my hands on. My toys, appliances, nothing was safe really. I remember one time my aunt came home to find our TV set in pieces on the living room floor. She was furious!" he chuckled remembering. "We were both surprised when it still worked after I put it back together. I never did figure out how the picture got on the screen though."

"That's funny!" I laughed. "So, you live with your aunt?"

"Not anymore, but she raised me," he said. "My parents died when I was about seven and she took me in. I've had my own place since I finished high school though."

"I'm sorry to hear about your parents," I said.

"I was really young," he said shrugging uncomfortably. "I don't remember them that much. You know, you could come and see my place sometime...if you're that interested in my living situation."

"Slow down, Romeo," I laughed touching his arm softly. "It's only our first date."

"Really?" he asked. "What about those other times?"

"Abigail and Kennedy said that they don't count," I informed him. "A date is when you ask me out and then we go out, not when we run into each other while we're both already out."

"Ah," he mused. "Well, we'll have to fix that then, won't we?"

"I hope so," I said sincerely.

We were driving in downtown Phoenix for a few minutes before Danny announced we were close. I was really beginning to wonder where we were going as I looked out the window for clues.

When we pulled up outside the Phoenix Symphony Hall, I was surprised. Out of all the guesses I had running through my head, this wasn't even on the list. A valet quickly came to open my door and help me out of the car, and after getting a ticket, Danny quickly joined me.

"I really hope you don't mind the ballet," he said taking my arm. "My aunt gets tickets to these things, but never goes. I thought this would be a perfect place to take you for Valentine's."

"I've never actually been to a ballet before," I confessed. As new as it was to me, I was still excited to experience this.

"Really? For some reason I thought you would have been before," he said looking slightly crestfallen.

"What are we seeing?" I smiled, leaning into him slightly as we walked inside.

"Cinderella."

As we walked up the steps to the entrance, I saw many other people dressed just as nicely as us in dashing tuxedos and elegant gowns. I felt extremely out of place in a crowd like this, and I was thankful of this gown that Abigail let me wear. In anything that I owned, I would have felt so self-conscious.

Waiting for the ballet to start we grabbed a couple cocktails in the lounge and continued our conversation.

"The last time we talked, you told me you and your mom were having a fight, have you guys worked that out?" Danny asked me.

"No," I began, not exactly liking the direction our conversation was going. "I don't think we will either."

"That's too bad," he offered.

"Not if you knew my mother," I countered.

"Where will you go after you graduate?" he asked. "Will you go back to Colorado?"

"I don't really see any reason to," I said. "And there are some pretty good reasons to stay right here."

"Am I one of those reasons?" he asked, leaning in a little closer.

"I'll let you know," I smiled feigning a little coyness. If tonight went well, he would be. I just wanted to get through this night first.

The ballet was more than I ever expected it could be. The music and amazing dancing was spectacular. The way they used their movements to portray their love, and the danger, as well as Cinderella's transformation...The story seemed to resonate with my current situation in life. My own mother the wicked stepmother, Danny the handsome prince, and my sister and best friends standing in for the fairy godmother.

I twirled a single rose in between my fingers as I walked out of the theater with Danny after the ballet ended. When our date first began, I felt like I had forever to tell him the truth, but time seemed to be slipping away from me now. I knew I had to tell him tonight. If I didn't do it tonight, then I never would. I could feel my heart racing in my chest at the thought of finally coming clean.

"We still have some time before our dinner reservations," Danny observed, causing me to jump at the sudden sound of his voice. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," I smiled trying to cover my reaction. "Just a little cold is all."

"I can imagine," he said, quickly removing his jacket to rest it on my shoulders. "That dress is beautiful, but it doesn't cover very much in the back...or the sides."

"No, I guess it doesn't," I blushed at his reminder of how exposed the sides of my breasts were.

"You're so beautiful when you're blushing," he observed.

He was so close to me as he settled his jacket on my shoulders, I could feel the warmth from his body, a blissful welcome to the chilly night air. I looked up into his eyes as his hands rested on my shoulders and I felt so small next to him, so vulnerable, but so entranced at the same time. I had felt those lips before, and the feel of his embrace. I craved that sort of touch from him.

My thoughts left me as I closed the last few inches between us to wrap my arms around his neck. I lifted up as far as I could on my heeled feet and pulled him down to meet my lips. His firm chest pressed into me, and his arms snaked around my waist underneath his coat and I could feel his cold hands warm themselves on the bare skin of my lower back.

As my lips tugged at his, and our soft tongues danced, I felt a passion building between us. His hand slowly traveled up my back, teasing my skin, and I could feel his forearm brush against the side of my breast, nearly causing my cock to surge forth, attempting to free itself from my panties. The mere thought of that happening shocked me out of my trance and I quickly pulled away gulping as I tried to catch my breath.

"Are you okay?" Danny asked seeing my reaction and the panic in my face. "Did I do something wrong?"

"I'm...I'm..." I began. "No, you didn't do anything wrong," I finally said, turning away from him, scared about what I had to do next.

I had planned on waiting until later on in the night to do this, but it seemed that I couldn't trust myself with him. I had told myself that I wouldn't do anything more with him until he finally knew the truth. The last thing I needed was for him to have one more fresh memory of deceit from me. After that kiss, it was too late.

"I need to tell you something," I began, speaking to the air in front of me. "Something about me."

"What is it?" He asked with gentle concern as he rested his hands on my shoulders. "What's wrong?"

"I've been lying to you about me," I choked out. "I'm not who you think I am."

"It doesn't matter," he said gently stroking my shoulders. "I care about you."

"When we met that first time, you were so nice to me," I continued, ignoring his words. "I never thought I would see you again. Then I saw you again and you remembered me. We'd been drinking and I let things go a lot farther than I should have. I never meant for any of this. I promise," I said fighting back tears. "At first it was just something about me you didn't know, but the more we saw each other and the more we talked, it became something I was lying to you about."

"It's okay," he tried calming me down. It was plain by my quivering voice that something was wrong. "I don't care what it is. There isn't anything you could say that would make me not love you," he said. "Since I first saw you, I felt something between us. When I didn't get your number that first time, I was kicking myself for letting someone like you get away. When I saw you again, I thought it was fate giving me another chance...another chance to be with you."

"When I wake up, you're the first thing I think about, and when I go to sleep you are what I dream about," he said gently turning me to face him, tilting my chin up to softly kiss my lips. "I hope you feel the same."

"I do," I said quietly before summoning all the courage I could. Not able to speak and look him in the eyes, I looked down. "But I was born a boy," I nearly whispered.

I spoke so softly I wasn't sure he heard me. Things seemed to slow down around me. His hands on my shoulders didn't move, and it seemed as if we both had stopped breathing. Finally, he began laughing and I thought for a moment that everything would be okay. As he laughed, I looked up into his eyes with so much hope.

"You totally had me!" he said, still chuckling. "There is no way you were ever a boy!"

In a moment, my hope was dashed. As he looked down at me, thinking that this was all some sort of joke, I began feeling more and more let down. I should have never told him, I thought sadly to myself. Part of me wanted to play along and tell him that this was all a big joke, but I couldn't. I had already done the hard part, and if he didn't accept me then I could move on and forget about him...eventually.

"Wait," he said, his expression changing. "You're...you're being serious," he said taking a step back, his eyes scrutinizing me even further.

"Yes," I said sadly. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes as I saw his expression change, first from concern, then to hurt, and finally to anger.