Wonderland

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Basically Hooters if the world were a matriarchy.
36 words
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I'm not sure how this one turned out. There is nothing wrong with it that I can put my finger on. I'm just not all that happy. What do you boys think? Let me know.

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Femme_Domme_Fatale
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10 Comments
Sparhauk70Sparhauk70over 1 year ago

Wow. I want to live in this world! The idea of confident, dominant women taking what they want, with no judgment, no fear. Incredible!

st_john_greenst_john_greenover 1 year ago

I really enjoy your stories and hope that you compose a part two. Thank you

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

i agree with what's been written here. Your style is very erotic and sexy but I'd like to see more. Take this as far as it will go. Have the businesswoman objectify the waiter in public. Make him go down on her in the mornings while telling him that he's only there to please her.

Great stuff and I hope that you continue with this. Very, Very Sexy

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

Hot story and very well read.

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

Your stories are always fun and creative. I would love to hear more!

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

If you disregard the role reversal, it's pure cliche.

I guess that's what makes you unhappy.

Someone suggested making sequels to play with the cliche, I definitely would enjoy that!

AnonymousAnonymousover 2 years ago

I see what you mean. I loved the erotic parts and the role reversal but maybe the problem was that it’s a little bit one-noted? As you say in the tag line, it’s basically hooters but in a matriarchy. Great idea! But then they have sex one time and it’s over. Maybe the idea just needs to be pushed farther. The waiter becomes a booty call on the side of the protagonist’s main relationship. Maybe the waiter gets passed around to friends or roped into his first MMF threesome with the protagonist and her lover. I think the foundation pieces are here: he’s a slutty waiter who is down to go home with a powerful business woman. I would like to see that dynamic of slut/businesswoman pushed as far as possible. Maybe this is only chapter 1 in a sexy saga! Love all your work!! Happy new year ❤️❤️

daytonakrysdaytonakrysover 2 years ago

If I may, cherished mistress, most of your narratives concern people in a relationship - marriage, concubinage, employment - with the dependent male desperate to please his Matriarch. The two souls in this story are strangers, and their tryst, while captivating in your enthralling narration, has no history as background. Now, that could be fixed with subsequent installments of our heroine and Leon, where he perhaps surprises them both by falling deeply in love with her, and eventually needing her approval as though his life depended on it. She of course would feel the power this gives her, and withhold her approval until his utterly swears exclusivity to her. ... Some paltry thoughts offered by your devoted follower

jdworks34jdworks34over 2 years ago

I love all your work, but is it possible to have a transcript for them?

I makes things easier to follow sometimes.

jdworks34jdworks34over 2 years ago

I haven't even heard it. But I know I am gonna love it.

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