You're Writing...What?

**The following is a rough transcription of a conversation I had with my best friend when I told her I was writing erotica. She had no idea this site even existed, so she poked around on here, one handed, for a couple days. I told her I'd be interested in answering questions to then post on the site as a form of Q&A to introduce myself as a writers as well as answer the myriad of questions I could see swirling around in her eyes. She jumped at the idea and this is how it went. Thanks in advance for reading.**

When did you discover that you enjoyed erotica?

I grew up with dial-up Internet. Can you imagine? Porn was out there, but god help anyone who was trying to watch it with that slow of a connection. I can't remember exactly how I stumbled across literotica, but if I had to guess, I'd say I clicked on a side link on a porn site. However I found it, I was hooked from the jump. The bits of porn I had seen- mainly stolen from under my parent's bed- were all so quick to jump to the sex. The same was true of things like "Letters to the Penthouse Forum" and the like. Fiction, on the other hand, created a build that I'd never known was possible- other than the ideas I created inside my overly active, teenage imagination. I couldn't get enough.

You've been on the site for this long without really participating; so what made you want to write now?

I've been writing things for years. This is just the first thing I've put out there for public consumption. I have ideas in my head, and more already on paper in one form or another, but my grammar can be a train wreck. That's the primary reason I waited so long. But I decided the only way to get better is to practice...and practice...and practice.

Why do you write? What's your motivation?

My spouse- plain and simple. I write to arouse and entertain my spouse. Every character I write is her/him. Physical characteristics, vocation, etc may change from time to time (i.e. she/he isn't blonde, nor is he/she the slightest bit frumpy), but that's only for variety. When I'm writing my spouse is the only thing in my mind's eye. I take his/her fantasies and try to bring them to life on the page. We love to roleplay, but, particularly when we first started, trying to get into "character" could be clunky and awkward. Instead I turned to writing outlines first, and then full stories, about the things we were into. Writing has also been a fun way for us to introduce new ideas to consider adding to our own sex life. For instance, we only got into BDSM because of Literotica. I sent him/her links to a couple stories that turned me on and waited, nervously, for her to read and react to them. She enjoyed them, so I wrote a piece catered to the portions of the story my spouse and I enjoyed most.

Where do your ideas for stories and scenes come from?

Almost everything I've ever written has stemmed from an idea grown from one of three main places. The first, and most frequent, is the fantasies of my spouse, fulfilled or not. If an idea turns him/her on, it turns me on- without exception. The second place is porn. There are a few sites that have popped up in recent years that have produced plot focused, cinema quality pornography that I couldn't have fathomed as a teenager watching grainy VHS with corny dialogue- if there was any dialogue at all. These plots can be twisted (all the better) or vanilla, but above all they're PLOTS. A perfect example of this, without breaking the rule about mentioning site names, is the actress who stars in many of their films- Maitland Ward. For the record, she's not even necessarily in either of our top five pornstars in terms of strictly appearance, but goddamnit she can act. If Maitland is in a scene, it's going to be a good one, there will be a seed of an idea there one hundred times out of ninety-nine. The final place I look is on this site. There are too many brilliant storytellers here that I've admired from a far for too long to be stupid enough not to look to them for inspiration.

What are the themes that interest you, or the both of you, most?

I could go on for hours about this question. It might be easier for me to tell the things that don't do it for either of us...

Pedophilia, bathroom stuff, and bestiality are atop that list. Can't do it, won't do it with pedophilia. We're parents. Protecting our kids is our greatest responsibility in life. But, even if we weren't, it's just horrific. Fuck anybody who writes it. That's judgmental, and I strive not to kink-shame, but in this one instance, I'm unapologetically sit in judgment. I try not to judge bestiality, but normally come up short in my efforts. Bathroom stuff (scat/watersports) is different. If two consenting adults are into it, even if I can't understand it whatsoever, I say more power to them. Incest would be next on the list, followed by feminization. Again, no judgment, but not my cup of tea. Well...hold on... that depends with the Incest/Taboo category. I see a decent amount of "Step" stories in there. It's become more and more a prevalent subgenre of porn and erotica. I don't consider that incest whatsoever. There are many scenes in that realm that I find interesting- both on film and in writing.

To answer your original question, I'd that all the aspects of my first story posted on the site are pretty good representations of themes that interest me most: cheating, initial reluctance/coercion, power play, BDSM, massage, exhibitionism, voyeurism, and uninhibited women.

In the things of yours that I've read- published and unpublished- blackmail shows up as a device more than a couple times. What's the appeal?

I'm really glad you asked that specific question. I read "My Secret Garden" by Nancy Friday when I was probably a little young to be reading it. Found it in a bookstore and couldn't seem to put it down. For those who don't know, it's a collection of women's fantasies revealed to Friday via interviews and letters. It was groundbreaking at the time it was released, and it was groundbreaking to a budding perv like me. That book is where reluctance/blackmail/coercion/etc. became a big thing for me- at least in theory. I agreed firmly with Friday's assertion that the appeal was for women to be able to let go- to do things they wouldn't normally allow themselves to do- because they didn't really have a choice.

I said before that I love the idea of uninhibited characters. Characters who couldn't give less of a shit about being "slut shamed." Growing up in the Midwest I admired the girls I went to school with who were that way. We were teenagers or undergrads; we were horny. Our hormones were out of control and we were drawn to the kavorka (Seinfeld reference) of those we wanted to fuck. Most of us didn't act on it in the early years at all, and probably not as often or with as many partners as our body would have hoped for in a less repressed society. Promiscuity was looked down upon. Certain- hell, most- sex acts were off limits. So...if a character's own upbringing or morality or whatever other repressive else forces them to deny themselves they secretly, actually really want...how do you go about bringing those latent wants and needs to life? You can persuade them. You can put them on a therapists couch. Or...you can take away some or all of their power to choose. "How can I feel guilty about liking A or B or C? I didn't have any choice. He/she MADE me. That's the only reason my body responded, right? Has to be." There's a real freedom in that. At least that's the theory.

So you want to be blackmailed or forced into some act or acts?

It's fantasy. "Secret Garden" was fantasy. I highly doubt most of the writers on here are writing about this they necessarily want to happen to them in their real lives. Just like most porn watchers don't really want to be fucked by their stepson while they're stuck, helplessly in the washing machine. Do I want you, or my spouse, or me, or anyone else who doesn't really want something to happen to them to actually occur? Lord no. For those who do, though, I'm working on the outline of a series about paying for fantasy fulfillment. If you've seen David Fincher's "The Game" starring Michael Douglas (if you haven't you should give it a watch), the idea stems from that. You pay, the make your fantasy a reality. I just need some billionaire to turn that kind of organization into a reality. I'll be waiting with a list of my own fantasies for them to start bringing home.

What's the story you want to write but can't figure out how to make it work?

Ours. It haunts me. We're by no means the most interesting couple in the world, but we did go through a kind of sexual renaissance a four or five years ago. We expanded our interests exponentially and, as a result of our conversations about sex and intimacy, we figured out how to be open and honest with each other in other areas of our life. There's hardly a topic more vulnerable to discuss than sex, so, if you can manage that, everything else becomes way easier.

It's not the wildest, most fantastical story in the world. No secret second lives. No mysterious letters in the mail. No pirates. But it's raw and it's real and it's really fucking hot at times. At least it was in real life. But I can't seem to put it on the page in a way that isn't dwarfed by the reality and that I don't loathe with every fiber of my being. Like I said- it haunts me.

What did that entail? The renaissance, I mean.

Almost every aspect of our current sex life. Toys, roleplay, power play, spanking, blindfolds, restraints, reading erotica together, watching porn together, admitting our deepest fantasies to each other, clubs, and on, and on, and on. We were never bad at sex before. I'd say we were pretty damn good at it. Now we're just better- and at a wide variety of ways. I say we went through a renaissance, but, in reality, I hope it's still ongoing. No reason to stop growing and talking now, right?

Greatest strength(s) as I writer? Weaknesses?

There's no question about my greatest weakness- it's grammar. I read Strunk & White cover to cover, feel like I have a firm grasp, and then it all goes to shit when I sit down at the keyboard. My reads like someone who's never been taught the correct way to use a comma nor a semicolon so they just throw them out in a rotation and hope that occasionally it turns out to be the correct usage. It's infuriating. Absolutely infuriating.

My other big insecurity is sexual word choice; (see that semicolon right there? No fucking clue if it's the right punctuation. None.) which is obviously a pretty large problem for someone attempting to write erotica. I can picture the acts in my head, and between my legs, but I can't find the words to paint the image on the page. I have lists to help me. I can call it a vagina or a pussy or a cunt or a sex or a bunch of goofy other words- I know that. But I feel like I choose the wrong one each time. Hopefully that improves over time.

My strength, I believe, is plot. Characters are obviously important, but if I'm forced to choose between them and plot, I'll take plot every time. I hope I move the narrative along decently well. I can develop a character along the way instead of the clichéd description at the outset (i.e. Juliet was stunning. She was buxom and brilliant, but she seemed not to know it. At 5'5", 163 pounds, with bleach blonde hair she blah blah blah). As a reader, I hate that technique. Don't tell me what she looks like- show me as we go. I hope I do that serviceably enough.

Pick five and only five one-sentence plot descriptions of stories in your head that you're most interested in putting on the page right this moment.

Jesus. Ok...umm...I'm stalling, obviously...ok here we go:

1 She agrees to be sold for one night at an auction held by a secret society.

2 A story set during the height of the Roman Empire.

3 A sexual tutor is hired to bring the protagonist out of a malaise.

4 An interrogation scene where pleasure instead of torture is used.

5 The fantasy acted upon for hire concept I mentioned earlier.

That's it. Thanks for reading!