Everyday I Write The Book Ch. 01byvelvetpie©
Tuesday, 10:30 p.m.
I am so fucking nervous! I just honestly can't believe that all these years of hard work have finally paid off. You don't know what I'm talking about, do you? Well, let me fill you in. A little more than a year ago, I submitted a book to an agent in New York and a miracle happened. A publisher wanted my book! They flew me to New York and I met my editor, Susan and went on a whirlwind tour of the city and left with a smile I couldn't wipe off for a week.
Now, as I lay here talking to you, I am about to go on my first book tour. Tomorrow morning, a black limousine will pick me up and whisk me off to the airport. You're probably wondering why I am writing to you instead of talking to someone else. Well, to be completely honest with you, I have no one. Yes, you read it correctly. I am alone.
I guess I should give you a general rundown on my life. I am 36 and I've been heavy my entire life. It doesn't help that everyone else in my family is and every diet I've ever attempted has failed miserably. I've been lucky enough to be blessed with good hair and a reasonably cute face but it's never caught a guy. I've had guys tell me that I have a lovely mouth ... like I don't know what that compliment's about? And you do know what the 'never caught a guy' line means, right? You don't? Well, I guess I'll have to tell you straight out. I'm still a virgin.
Yes, you read right. This glorious head of blonde wavy hair and 38DDs has done nothing to break that barrier. I tried sex with a woman, just because I was curious. It was interesting but I don't think I did a good job on getting her off. It was my first time and I was all thumbs, so to speak. Would I do it again? Yes but I'm not sure if I would want that as a serious relationship because I want children. I could always adopt but I want to be pregnant. I want to experience the entire pregnancy/giving birth scenario and know that I'm a woman.
I don't envision that I will actually be married and have a family so I'll probably end up going to a sperm bank. That seems better than having an intrusive man in my life and I'm hoping that if that happens, my child will be able to fill the empty spaces in my heart. I can live without love if my child loves me.
Well, Diary, what started out so happily is now serious and morose. Story of my life, I guess. Either that or low self-esteem. (Sigh.) Tomorrow begins a great journey in my life. A chance to leave this shell behind and become a new woman. After all, no one knows who I really am. Each stop will be an act: shaking hands and smiling like a politician, never letting anyone get close. I think if I work it like that I'll be safe. I'll always be safe.
* * * * *
Wednesday, 3:14 a.m.
Sorry to wake you but I couldn't just let you hanging until tomorrow. Remember that I told you I'd done it with a woman before? Well, her name is Marilyn and she's my sister. She came by tonight to wish me good luck and to bring me a present. She brought me a heart pendant that came with two chains and together, we broke the silver heart in half. I was afraid that we'd broken it but she said that it was supposed to work that way; that she was carrying my heart and that I was carrying hers and that until I returned, she would be thinking about me and hoping that I found love on my trip.
Of course, I cried. I'm such a baby. I didn't just cry. I bawled. She wrapped her arms around me and held me while I sobbed. Bored? Well, this is where it gets good. She started kissing the tears from my cheeks and I gasped when her mouth moved over mine. "I want you to leave with a good memory." Her tongue took a slow and delicate circuit around my lips before sensuously slithering inside and curling around mine. "No more tears, Lyndie. You've cried enough for all of us."
Kissing a woman is so different from kissing a man. A man is all fire and passion, you know, bull-in-the-china-shop kind of fire and passion: desperate, sloppy and forceful. With a woman, the dynamics are different. The fire and passion are carefully cultivated like a well-built fire. First, the kindling, small bits of fatwood that will catch and hold fire quickly, but will burn out in a hurry. Then, larger sticks are laid next and then the big logs that will sustain and provide nourishment for the fire.
Marilyn's kisses were kindling and I felt the heat of the oncoming blaze as keenly as I felt the softness of her lips against mine. Her hands seemed to sear a path from my shoulders to my nipples, pinching them into hardness and making me groan into her mouth. My pussy awoke to her touch and before long, my panties were wet and growing wetter by the moment. She tugged my pants down and within seconds, knew how aroused I was and gave me a knowing smile that sent blood rushing to my cheeks.
I had always been self-conscious of my thighs but Marilyn has always loved them. She showed how much by licking me from knee to pussy, humming when her tongue skated through patches of my sticky juices. I shook, my hands filled with breast flesh, my fingers pinching my nipples until jets of pain stabbed my body, pooling in my cunt. Marilyn continued to tease me, biting my skin just millimeters from my throbbing box and totally ignoring it.
"Mari ... "
She lifted her head and gave me wet-faced smirk. I was determined not to beg this time and she knew but didn't care. She used her firm tongue to trace circles in my quivering flesh, mimicking the actions she would do with my pussy and before long, I was whimpering, breathlessly begging and pleading.
"Tell me what you want." She pushed one of my hands aside and gave my nipple a hard suck, driving me insane with need.
"What?" That mischievous smirk reappeared. "I don't think I heard you."
"Suck me!" I nearly screamed, pushing her mouth back down onto my tit. "Suck my pussy!"
And Diary, did she suck it! She took her time in settling between my legs and I closed my eyes, trying not to beg again when she pried my cum-sticky lips apart and gave them a long lick. I couldn't keep from whimpering each time her tongue licked my lips so it was a given that I was going to scream when she pushed it into my hole. She started on a plan of mercilessly teasing me, tracing the furred edges of my outer pussy lips, then dipping down to the thinner inner set and finally plugging the source of my leak. I couldn't do anything but gasp with each breath, quivering uncontrollably as she pushed me toward cumming.
When the first one hit, I gasped so loudly that I thought I inhaled every bit of air in the room. Marilyn held her tongue inside me, wiggling it against my rippling pussy walls and drawing an even harder orgasm from me. A third and fourth came in quick succession and my legs started vibrating. My whole body knew what was coming and my skin responded with electrical tingles. She saved the best for last, thrusting two fingers into my cunt while finally paying attention to my clit. I did scream then.
I came so hard that I passed out for a few minutes and woke to a smaller orgasm when my lovely sister cleaned me up with her tongue. "Come on." She grabbed my hand and put her arm around my waist, guiding me into my bedroom. She tucked me in and lay down beside me, gently stroking my hair. "I love you, Lyndie. This is the opportunity of a lifetime and I want you to enjoy yourself."
"Will you miss me?"
Her fingers stroked the new pendant and the skin it lay atop of and gave me a soft kiss. "What do you think?"
When I wrote my first entry to you a few hours ago, I never thought that I would feel the way that I do. I expected to leave in my usual state of depression but I feel so much better now. Knowing that I have Marilyn's support makes the journey that much easier.
I just wanted to tell you, Di. I just wanted you to know. Everyday I write the book.