Little Things Ch. 05bynomennescio©
This chapter wasn't supposed to exist, which is why it messes up the neat and tidy "of 04" I had in my previous submissions. But even I knew how abrupt my original ending was...and some quite insightful suggestions from klaxx allowed me to realize how I might create a better sense of finality. Hence, this chapter.
As with the rest, I would suggest it be read only in the proper order, lest nothing make sense.
The remainder of the break passes with such swiftness that it feels positively unfair, as though time itself now conspires against us, hours spent in each other's company seeming hardly more than moments. After that one glorious morning, we don't dare too far inside the house - not with our creaky metal bedframe, and mom never gone for long. We have to steal interludes elsewhere, hidden away in the barn, or in the truck on a deserted stretch of road, or deep in the woods. Not sex - at least, not always. Just bathing in this new depth to our relationship, in love now blooming bright and verdant. Laying beside him in the snow, staring into his eyes...I'd seen couples do that kind of thing before, just stand together for long spans of time, arms entwined as they gazed at one another, and I'd never quite bought it. Never saw the appeal, thought maybe they were faking it, forcing it...pretending, to fool themselves into thinking they had some kind of fairy-tale romance. Now, suddenly, I understand. I could stare forever into those soft sapphire eyes, bask an eternity in the warmth of his embrace. If we had an eternity to spend...
But we don't. Reality calls, grey and dismal, and so after a heartfelt parting with my parents, we're driving back up to the college. Glad, at least, for the accident of logistics that requires David to take the trip twice, to bring back the truck. One more day with him. Maybe two. After that...well.
I glance over, smile softly at David in the driver's seat. Let my hand snake over to ruffle gently in golden hair kissed with pink, stroking idly at the back of his neck. The muscles there loose now, relaxed, as he looks over and grins goofily back at me. The winter sun shining brightly down on us, gleaming in off the hood of the truck. We don't need to talk. Not right now. Silence can be its own language, carry its own melody - a song of tender togetherness, laid atop the rambling guitar that plays from the truck's speakers. I've half a mind to unbuckle myself, to crawl over and squeeze into his lap...but a lurking police car we pass on the side of the highway puts the kibosh on the idea. Wouldn't want to get pulled over for something like that. Especially now that we're nearly there.
It's about seven o'clock when we finally pull into the apartment parking lot and stumble up the concrete stairway to the second floor. Dinnertime - even before I get the door open, my nose picks up the spicy scent of some choice new dish, and once I do, there's two familiar faces looking in my direction all the way over from the kitchen table.
"Well, look who made it." April speaks first, blandly amused, a glass of wine carelessly tilted in her hand. "Guess I owe you five bucks, Mare."
"Welcome back!" Marie's reaction is the stronger, rising from the table and rushing over in greeting. Apology falling into her expression when she's only halfway to me, weakly smiling as she pushes in for a friendly hug. "God, Sam, I'm sorry. You told me you were coming back today, and then when I was preparing dinner I quite forgot." She bites at her lip, looking as though she's telling me about a death in the family. "I'm afraid there isn't any left."
I have to laugh. "Don't worry about it, Mare. I mean, it smells delicious, but David and me filled up on drive-through burgers on the way over." Glancing up at April, a bit of affably disparaging humor curling my lip. "I see the place didn't burn down after all. Good."
She laughs at that, cheerfully enough - but there's a new spark of interest in her eye at the mention of my brother, and it grows only brighter as he steps into the living room after me, toting my largest piece of luggage. A familiar slink in her step as she, too, rises to her feet and joins the gathering just inside the door, her gaze on David at least as much as on me. "It was close. We have some pretty wild parties here, while you were gone." Her tone, at least, keeps to its abstracted, superior amusement, not yet dropping to the low croon of seduction.
"Oh, we did not." Marie rolls her eyes in tolerant exasperation.
"...some pretty wild parties..." April just repeats softly, enamored of her own joke. A little pause, smirking, as she eyes David and me. "How about you two? Bring back any corn for us?" She ends with a vague gesture with her free hand at the living room furniture, taking another sip from her wine. "Sit down, sit down."
It takes me a moment, settling down on the couch next to David, to decide that she's being genuinely friendly. Or at least, mostly genuine. It can be hard to tell with April, sometimes. "Afraid not. Not exactly the season for it, you know."
Her tongue clucks quietly in faux disappointment. "Too bad." A moment's pause, glancing over. "You know, I didn't realize you'd be coming back with her, David. How long are you staying this time?"
He shrugs, smiles small and wry. "Probably just tonight. My school starts up again, day after tomorrow."
April's lips push outward in a pillowy little pout. "A shame." Her gaze flits back over to me - but I'm pretty sure it isn't for my benefit that she slowly crosses her legs, her skirt lifting up above the knee. "Mind if I borrow him tonight, Sam?" Laughter still in her eyes, though her voice carries a challenge slightly slurred with alcohol. "I mean, I was all set to have a boring night in...but if he's here, I'd hate for him to go to waste."
I bristle inside, unable to immediately think how to respond, my hand clutching tight and possessive at David's - but to my relief, he answers for me. "Sorry, April." Firm and confident, with just a hint of humor. "Not gonna happen."
An exaggerated sigh. "Fine, fine." Affable enough. But her eyes are curious and enterprising on the two of us, looking at how our fingers lace together, how I sit on the couch leaning comfortably on David's side. For a moment, she opens her mouth to say something more - then shuts it again, shakes her head as she grabs for the remote and flips on the TV. My heart fluttering with an ambiguity of tension and relief. A secret half-kept.
For perhaps an hour the four of us sit there, chatting lightly as we alternate between watching the big-budget drama on the television and the often more engaging antics of Marie's kitten chasing down imaginary prey. And for all the conflict I've had over the last year with April, all the awkwardness now of this secret David and I share...I feel comfortable. Calm. Cheerful, despite the appraising glances April keeps shooting in our direction. Indeed, almost mischievous, snuggling in closer against his side to watch her eyebrow lift. Teasing her with the idea, the truth she must suspect.
I guess I can't be too surprised when this eventually drives her to the breaking point. Really, she showed admirable restraint. "Okay, Sam," muting the volume as she shifts in her seat to face us directly. "I have to ask. That thing we talked about, just before you took off..." She hesitates, and I feel a certain gratitude that she's still being circumspect. Just in case it weren't true. "Did anything happen with that?" Her brown eyes sparkling, engaged and hungry.
A pause, silent. David, warm and solid and reassuring beside me; Marie, looking on in uncertain curiosity, sensing the significance of the question without knowing its implication. Even her kitten seems to be watching, waiting for my answer. I'm not sure what to say. I mean...god, I didn't plan to actually tell her. Didn't think I'd tell anyone. This isn't exactly the kind of thing you spread around. Hell, I think it's even illegal, some places.
But these are some of my closest friends. Even if it has been a rather rocky friendship, with some of them. If I can't tell them...besides, I don't even want to keep it a secret, really, don't want it to be something shameful and wrong. I want to climb up on the rooftop, scream out how I love him, how my body tingles as his touch. I want to yell it at the top of my lungs and let all the world look on in jealousy of what we have together. I mean, I won't. Probably. But right here, right now, with just these two confidantes...
Just a little squeeze at David's hand, and he turns to face me as though he already knows what I intend, as though we had it all planned and rehearsed. His face hovering before me, strong and handsome, happiness softly curved on firm pink lips. That familiar hunger, need warming in my belly...to taste his tongue, to breathe his breath...nothing to hide, no reason to hold back. It feels the most natural thing in the world as I lean into him, touch together our lips in a kiss first slow and gentle, but soon surging forth with ardent desire. Mouths opening to one another, sliding breathlessly on hot and slippery skin as my free arm sneak around his back, pulling me tighter against him. Wanting to feel his body all the way along my own.
"What are you doing?" I scarcely hear Marie's shocked exclamation. A giggle bubbling somewhere inside - isn't it obvious? And April's rejoinder, quick and scolding, "God, Marie, shut up!" Then nothing. Quiet, as David's tongue caresses my consciousness, as I nibble teasingly on his lower lip, diving with eyes closed into the heady abandon of his embrace, of tasting, touching, kissing this beautiful boy, with a tiny extra thrill in the faint awareness of our audience.
Finally - thirty seconds later? A minute? - I pull away to glance with a bit of a smirk over at my wide-eyed roommates. Marie's mouth hanging half open, scandalized; April as flushed as I feel, grinning madly, the first to speak. "Oh. my. god." An almost manic delight in her eyes. "That is...just about the hottest thing I've ever seen."
"Are you crazy?" Horrified disbelief. Marie's gaze darts back and forth between April and me; it's not even clear whom she's addressing. "He's your - they're brother and sister!"
"Uh, yeah, I know." April manages somehow to sound thoroughly condescending without losing her rabid glee. Her attention turning back to us, teeth shining brightly through her grin. "Please tell me you've gone all the way."
Another secret. Another potential confession. I glance over at David, at his quirked eyebrow and faint, sardonic smile. If he doesn't mind telling... "Yeah." My lips tugging upward, a thrill to this revelation. Resting my head lovingly on his shoulder, as he holds me close. There's no fear with him beside me, no shame or worry; I feel invincible, like I could stand naked in a stadium announcing all we've done.
"Samantha, you can't be serious." Marie sounds downright stricken, staring at us in shock and quiet horror. "What are you thinking? You can't - I mean, what if you get pregnant? With someone that close...you'd be looking at fifty times the chance of some kind of genetic disease."
Despite my sense of indestructibility a moment ago, this strikes home. My heart falling a fraction of an inch. A brief hesitation. I'm sure she's right; Marie knows that kind of thing. And the idea of it...of trying to have a life like this and facing a diseased child, some sad, deformed wretch...
It takes the gentle strength of David's arm around my waist to bring me back to reality. That's getting way too far ahead of things. "I'm not worried about that." My voice coming firm enough, sincere. "I'm on the pill, and...maybe it's something we'll have to think about, talk about, but for right now it doesn't matter." A quiet moment, looking back at Marie, at her head slowly shaking in something not far from disgust. A trace of disappointment in my tone. "I was hoping you'd be happy for me."
"Happy?" Incredulous. "About you sleeping with your brother?"
"Well..." I laugh, brief and cheerless. "Maybe not that part specifically, but..." Silence. Emotion lumping in my throat. I have to swallow it before I can continue, squeezing at David's hand. "I love him. I love him like I've never loved anyone, and I didn't even realize it until just recently. I feel like...like I'm meant to be with him." Stumbling into cliché, as I struggle to express the feeling that pounds in my heart.
"Sam, you're not supposed to feel that way about your brother." Marie's voice slow and urgent, as if warning a child the dangers of a hot stove. Glancing over to David, her eyes a mix of worry and apology. "Or your sister. It's not how things are supposed to work."
My head shakes quick and forceful. "I don't care what I'm supposed to feel, Marie. I love him. And I hoped that, as my friend, you would...support me."
"I'm sorry." Quiet. Almost a touch of pleading - I don't think I've ever seen her look so uncomfortable. "I'm sorry. I wish I could, but this is just...it isn't right, Sam. It's not healthy. Genetically, or psychologically, or...or anything." Distress forcing her to her feet, heavy on her brow as she begs herself away. "Look, I'm going to go to my room, and you three can do whatever you like, okay? Just...I don't think I want to know about it." And with nothing further said, she turns to make a quick exit, disappearing down the hallway with a tight, unhappy gait.
Silence for some moments. Awkward, despite David's thumb stroking comfortingly at the back of my hand, despite April's reassuring half-smile, sitting now curled up Indian-style in her chair. I'm the one at the center of this. I have to speak. "She seems pretty freaked out." A low muttering. I don't know why it surprises me.
"Oh, she's just being finicky." April answers quick and eager. "Deep down, she's probably totally turned on by the idea. And listen, you two-" She points us out dramatically with her index fingers, and I can't help feeling a little better, cheered by her high spirits. "-are seriously my personal heroes right now. I mean, god, I didn't think you were really going to do it! Thought you were too high up on your horse for that." Her grin sparkling over to my brother. "David, you totally made the right choice. I told Sam, you two make an incredibly cute couple."
"Well, um." He smiles back with wry humility. "Thanks, April."
A snort of laughter as her head shakes giddily, and I can recognize the faint flush of arousal on her cheeks. "God, I can't stop thinking about it! I wish I could just, um..." Delighted inspiration flashes in her eyes, and she lets out a little gasp. "You know what would really be something, if the three of us-"
"No." Quick and firm, cutting her off before she can finish the suggestion she so obviously intends. I like April well enough, but the idea of doing anything sexual with her is no more appealing than the thought of sharing David. "Absolutely not."
"Oh, don't be so quick to turn it down," she laughs slyly. "Why don't we see what your brother has to say, hm?" And hopping to her feet, she scampers over to the couch to plop with curled-up legs down on the opposite side of David, putting on one of her pouty, seductive faces. Stroking softly at his bicep, through his shirt. "I'm guessing you haven't been with two girls at once before, right?" Her voice high and sweet now, like a little girl's. "Be a pretty fun way to spend your last night here, I bet. Sleeping with your sexy sister and her hot roommate. The two of us fighting over who gets your cock..." Her hand slips down, gripping gently at his thigh as her eyes flash beguilingly. "What do you think?"
I just look away, biting my tongue. Frustrated. Wishing again that she were just a little more restrained, that she didn't pursue her desires quite so vigorously. But - damn it. If David wants to, if it'll make him happy...I'll do it. For him. No question that he's worth it. Just...
"Sorry." He scarcely even looks at her. Just a little glance from the corner of his eye as his arm squeezes tight around my waist, his cheek touching warm and loving at my forehead. "I've already got everything I need, right here." His fingers entwining reassuring with mine as brief laughter bubbles from my throat, happy and relieved, and I snuggled in closer against him. Crane up my neck for a tiny kiss on the side of his jaw.
"Hmph." April's pout a bit more genuine now. "Fine. If you want to be all 'my fair lady' about it." Still sitting there, leaning half against him as she thinks for a moment. "What if I just watched?"
"Jesus, Ape." A wince spreading on my face. Somehow this suggestion feels even dirtier than the threesome.
"What? Come on!" Faint, plaintive aggravation. "This is like one of my biggest fantasies. Every time you hear about it in real life, it's always some gross couple in their fifties who didn't even know they were related. Or it's like a stepbrother or whatever, and who the hell cares. You two - you're damn sexy together, and it's the real deal. Watching the two of you go at it would be about the hottest thing in the universe." She bites softly at her lower lip, a faraway look in her eye. "Fuck, I can just see it...spread wide and screaming as he pumps you full of hot brothercum..."
"Okaaaay." Awkward, bemused laughter, as I try not to think too much about that, try to pre-empt any other fantasies. "I get the idea." She certainly has a way of forcing forward the comfort level of a conversation; I can scarcely believe what I'm saying as I turn my attention back to David, a light blush tinting my cheeks. "What do you think? Does she deserve to see us together?"
"Hmm." Half a smile curves his lips, warm and thoughtful as he glances again over at April, back to me. A touch of humor in his tone. "Maybe next time."
"Next time?" Her voice shoots high in shallow outrage, pulling away. "Fuck, now you're just teasing me."
"Sorry, Ape." A bit of a giggle at my throat. "You heard the man. Next time." I rub gently at his chest, treasuring the feel of his body. Drinking greedily his scent. All for me... "Maybe."
April rises sharply to her feet with an exasperated groan. Glares back at us. "Fine. Jerks." Not entirely serious, by the tiny upward quirk I still see at the corner of her ruby-red lips. "I gotta go make some calls, see if I can find a guy willing to call me 'sis' in bed. You two, you can just..." She tries to scowl, but as she looks at us clasped and cuddling together on the couch, her expression dissolves again to giddy, exuberant delight. "You can just fuck like crazy people. Won't be getting any complaints from me about noise, trust me." A little huff of joyous laughter, and then she, too, scampers down the hallway and into her room.
Finally alone together. A beat passes, near quiet; I can feel David's low, amused chuckle vibrating against me through his chest. His lips touching my scalp in something like a kiss before he speaks. "Good thing we have her permission."
I have to giggle as well. "She's certainly a character. Knows what she wants. Usually gets it, too." But not this time. A bit of uncharitable smugness as I push myself up onto David's lap, throw my legs across his. Squeezing close, cheek to cheek, murmuring in his ear. "Were you being serious? About maybe doing it in front of her?"
"More or less. Yeah." I can feel his hand, strong at the small of my back. Each of his spread fingers a distinct presence in my mind. "I mean, it sounds like she really wants it, and it wouldn't really cost us anything."
"Guess that's one way of looking at it." I pull back a bit to look him in the eye, one brow lifted curiously. "Still. Wouldn't you be embarrassed?"
"Kinda seems like I would be, doesn't it?" His baritone laugh sounds again, honest and gentle. "I mean, I think about it, and it sounds like something I'd be terrified to do. In front of someone else..." His head shakes, loose golden locks briefly waving. "But...I don't know. I'm not afraid of it. I don't care who sees how much I love you. In front of your roommate, or on live TV with a million people watching."