All Comments on 'An Absence of Trust'

As someone who lived in NW most of my life Apple Cup the politics, the way things felt , the real estate issues all were spot on. I enjoyed the story just wish the evil daddy was a lite more nuanced. Not sure I could quite buy the big Corp didn't already have real estate in the portfolio seeing as the housing markets been hot for a while.

Unputdownable.

Well written. Well plotted. And well told.

You are a champion.

Full marks.

Good story but I don't buy Robert's suicide. It's more likely he would have killed Billy and either gone to jail or killed Billy first and then himself. Just giving up isn't in his character.

Very nice.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.

Thanks Gumbo25.

The author must have some sort of emotional investment in this story.

His writing failed to pass it along to me. This was a very long trip with very little return for the reader anywhere along the way.

This road-weary traveler gives it a very average (and generous) 3-stars.

Excellent story. 5stars

The suicide doesn't seem quite right. And, it'll be very difficult for our guy to have any trust in a woman going forward. Too bad. Real good story! D

Great story and for a long one, it still held my interest right to the almost abrupt end. A second installment, maybe? The wife lost an election and her husband but it seemed she only mourned the election loss and the disappearance of her new lover. A couple of texts, a meeting where she's served but the classic "we can get over this" line said it all. That's just how I felt - the story, indeed, was beautifully structured and as I mentioned in the first sentence really held the reader's interest.

It was a rambling tale, but enjoyable. Less a Swiss watch, more a Rube Goldberg contraption. Mad’s Dad’s suicide was more melodramatic than realistic, losing some story credibility, and missing a chance at an interesting confrontation between the characters as their roles reversed. Madeline’s final exchanges with the MC were given short shrift given the lengthy build up, so the potential catharsis wasn’t explored. She was all about trust, where was their discussion about trust? Letting the trust issue in their marriage become the basis for a failure of her campaign message was great, but not exploring it more interpersonally made the issue more emblematic than real. Still, 4 out of 5, I liked it.

Really liked it, unfortunately my phone won’t let me vote

For such a good writer for content, I'm so disappointed in your ending. With a virtuous main character in Billy, he deserves better than the denouement here. But that's

maybe your style - leave us readers with a neo-modern, real life, abrupt ending to a tease & allure for a possible sequal. Feel shortchanged. Two stars.

WindySwimming

Brilliant but very sad. I would have liked a bit more of a conversation at the end. Her life was built on trust so how could she explain what she did? It would also have been good if we heard a bit more about what happened to her. How did the pre nup affect her. The suicide was unnecessary and a bit ridiculous. He was wealthy and could have resigned. Still a big 5 stars.

3 stars for yet another USA football story that morphs into a BTB story. Most of the characters were just awful. The football part should have been compacted into about 4 paragraphs. Because it was sooooooo long, the rest of the story became LESS important and somewhat boring. The political meanderings really detracted from the meat of the story and the ending was so predictable it was anti-climatic. The 3 star rating was a gift, because some of the writing was really good and I liked the secondary characters Ryan and Lisa.

Why do you depict women with huge breasts to be so desirable? Once they hit 40 those breasts are pretty much aligned with their belly button and sinking fast. To me a B cup or less is far more desirable, as long as the nipples are HUGE.

Look forward to a sequel to this story where he does find true love... Or even reconciles with Maddy after a decade? I know I am crazy

Also fictitious: that a Seattle Newspaper would even think of endorsing a Republican candidate for attorney general. ;p

Could have been a touch longer. The suicide at the end seemed a bit out of left field. If Robby had the juice to get millions in election contributions, he seemed likely an adept at bureaucratic infighting. But it was a tough week for him. A line on ‘and Ros’s actions defending Tiffee had him under review as well’ would have gone far.

But here I am, doing the Monday Morning Quarterbacking that you disdain. It was a great story and I enjoyed it.

Very well done! Made me sad and angry for Billy. Didn't want to see Robert do himself in, but it makes sense. Felt a bit incomplete with so little dialogue between Billy and Maddy after he found out she was a cheating, lying slut. Feels like she got off way too easily!

you lost one star for the revenge tag as there was no revenge, other than that it was a good story

Ehhhh, it was ok... it was more a story about football and real estate than anything else.. absolutely nothing that would leave a lasting impression or a story I'd read a 2nd time. It was just.......ehhh.. zero emotions, although there was cheating drama, I found myself bored af with this story🤭.. respectfully... maybe because I'm a girly girl, and don't give a shit about football, basketball, hockey..... none of that bullshit.. this story, I had to skip a few to pass all the football and buying real estate bs. There was not a lot of "Loving wives" in the story.. even the confrontation with his wife legit bored me..... after 11 fucking pages, I expected more... it was just .....ehhhh.... I think the story was entirely way too long, long-winded than a mofo and boring🤷🏾‍♀️... respectfully.. the story wasn't bad, but it wasn't great either. I expected to read just as much about the divorce, as I read about football, real estate and politics 🙄... I'm just truly baffled why this story was so long?😒... It didn't really go anywhere, I kept reading hoping we'd get some action/drama.. NOT....It was a little entertaining.. his stupidity at least... how is it his wife was acting different but that didn't give him a reason to question it?🤔 ..she's coming home whenever she pleases, barely calling him, he didn't think she mightve been fucking around? ... there's a difference between loving /trusting a person completely and just being plain stupid and blind... it took him entirely way too long to realize his marriage been at risk or was over for a while...... why did his ex father in law kill himself and in such a way, in his office, during business hours? Why did his ex father in law hate him so much? I can't imagine having that much hatred for someone that's never done anything to me.. honestly, I don't think he ever should've married her in the first place😏. She never stood up to her father for him when her father was being a complete asshole to him.. she missed his brother's engagement gathering because her father wanted her to stay and she got shit faced drunk.. she never even botherrd to come home ... at one point, I thought she was fucking daddy🤭😭.....gave me strong incest tease 👀... anyway, I have nothing else to add. There were some grammar errors, but it wasn't bad.

Between the title and by-line, the entire story arc was predictable. The narrative and sentence flow were outstanding though, making for a really engrossing read. I think I know what you were shooting for, but your characterizing of Billy as some dumb jock who happens to stumble upon real estate investing was a little off putting for me. The interactions between Billy and Ryan were expertly done, and I could really feel for Ryan and his transition. I hope we get to see Billy again sometime soon... 5* overall.

I loved this story. *****

I thought your story was well written. As with a lot of stories, it started out bit slow but most definitely picked up steam. This is one character that I feel you could carry forward into another story. You gave him the back bone to carry on. Well done.

I've certainly learnt a lot about American Handball this week on lit, not a bad thing I like most sports...and they have both been excellent stories. Well done Gumbo 25 a great tale.

Good story that I really enjoyed, although I seem to have read something similar, especially the back stairs and fishing line.

Anyway 5/5

Great story, pity not more revenge on Branden.

I wanted to REALLY like this submission from one of this site’s better contributors…but it just didn’t work. Oh, it was well written…but for some reason I just never came to care about the MC, “Billy”. Not sure why…but something was just missing. Just slightly “off”.

.

E.G…..readers never got an insight into his real with his younger brother. Or his various girlfriends. His break with “Chris” seemed too casual. His romance with Maddy seemed unemotional. Her family were — except for Ryan (probably the most interesting character in tne story) mostly cardboard LW cutouts. His reporter friend was interesting…but maybe she could have been more “involved” in figuring out Maddy’s cheating?

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Probably the best scene in the story was when Chris introduced this too laid back guy to her hubby and daughter 😎. Karma.

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For such a long read…and I LIKE long stories when done well! … it just didn’t quite deliver. It was…average.

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3 ***

Oh PS…and once again we have author “Tilan” badmouthing another poster…even as this coward still refuses to allow comments on his shit 😎

Eleven pages for a five page story. No thanks.

More alternate universe science fiction than fiction...a tough on crime candidate in Seattle..lol...thats the biggest piece of fiction on the whole site. TC Ireland.

Very nice life story of a young man from childhood through life as an athletic, business man, marriage and on. Sorry that his story ended on a sad note but such is life for many of us. 5*s.

Liked it. A bit long but kept my interest. Well written, as is your norm.

Lujon2019, no revenge? Did you miss the part where he completely sank her election by outing her to the reporter? Or how about the chunk of bone sticking out of the assholes leg as he lay in a heap at the bottom of the steps? Or how about daddy offing himself because he was going to have Billy become his boss? I’d say those three suffered for crossing Billy.

Too bad we didn’t get the storybook ending with Billy reuniting with Chrissy, but it was more believable that she’d be married.

Let's see...$1200/month X four houses = ten grand/month... So THAT's how those real estate moguls make all that money!!!

very good story.5⭐

I really liked the plot of the story which revolves around "trust".

Wow! This was a long story for this website, but you managed to keep my interest the whole way through. Natural dialogue and excellent characterization were strengths. I have to admit I really liked your ending w/ Chrissy being married, as the other way to end it seems like such a staple for this website. Your ending was refreshingly honest that not everything works out. He just ends up rich, w/ a great job and friends. The poor guy:)

Excellent. 5 stars. Thank you!

As a Seattleite myself, it was fun reading about the craziness of Seattle. THANK YOU!

Good story and I recognize the intentional rejection of the easy rebound partner in Chrissy. Too many stories have the next romantic interest show up in much too convenient ways and while it might disappoint the happy ending (not the massage type happy ending) crowd, the old girlfriend being married is much more likely.

Great story. Your version of evicting squatters may have been fictional, (and in usa) , but my business has been in property for the last forty years and I can confirm that it works and is not that uncommon. You have to move before they wreck the place. The ‘most legal’ method is to move in ‘your’ squatters alongside them who make their life impossible. There’s guys who do that and they don’t cost a lot.

a dithering dufus

Loved it! Riveted my attention. Although I needed to, I just couldn't put it down. Please count my vote in the really need a sequel category. Just simply can't leave Billy hanging.

I read the comments and see they are mostly positive. As one reader said the gunshot was definitely out of left field but you created that scene from your earlier comment from Ryan about Robert having a gun. Glad to read a long but very interesting story with the suspense and drama to go with the story line

Haven’t nearly finished story, but we certainly learned far more about his football career than was necessary. Makes me think this will be another story were the protagonist is a narcissistic saint. Oh well. I’ll keep plugging away

I tried to get through it, but just couldn’t. It’s too bad because I think there was a really good 4-5 page story hidden inside here somewhere

Well, without her father in the picture and without his very bad influence I could see a reconciliation in the future - at his terms.

Some can't see why Robert did himself but I can see it. He is described as bully and always wanting and getting his way. He sees himself as one of the alphas of all the alphas (alpha-alpha) and suddenly there is this - in his eyes - lowlife above him and furthermore he is under investigation for his involvment with Tiffee and it also seems he lost control over his daughter. He isn't a person who would be able to face his mistakes because in his eyes he doesn't make mistakes. So yes, I can understand his suicide.

I really enjoyed it. For a story to be this long the writing has to be good. I liked the fact that Billy took care of the predator, Tiffee. The old "twine on the stairs" trick. For me it was a 5 star story. Thanks.

Excellent all around

Thanks for writing

A great story with a great premise. I did not think it was too long. I thought your characters were well thought out and kept the interest for the reader. I do think Maddy did not receive enough revenge and would have liked to see more about the divorce and the money Billy made on the sale of his company. I do think the suicide was over the top for this story.

I liked the story. I would give you 5* but voting on Literotica no longer works with Microsoft Edge.

Martian Slut Ray? She is a fanatic loyal loving wife, then, Shazam!, she's fucking Robert. Because they got drunk and had a good day. Who could resist that kind of lust and seduction? By page 5 I had to skip to page 11 and start reading backwards. I could give a shit about football and real estate. I just wanted to get to the part where the wife turns whore and fucks him over, and find out why and how such a sound virtuous woman could be turned into Slutula. Yeah, I get it, Republican politicians; cheaters and scum bags. The woman who started out as this intensely intelligent savvy and mature professional ends the story as this gurgling stumbling mindless whore, who can't seem to grasp why adultery should affect their marriage over the long term. Ya, Think? Yeah, the jock ends up being the brainiac and the legal sharks are just bumbling fools, who kill themselves when someone spoils their day. Nice try. You must really be from Seattle. Where else is reality in such short supply? California doesn't count. And thanks for the effort.

Gumbo masterstroke--easy 5* Best effort since Alii Drive IMHO. The commenters nitpicking missed the heft of the larger and well thought out piece. This story has shades of DQS which I hope is taken as a compliment. Looking forward to your next submission.

Fascinating story. Well done. So sad for Billy, but he’s a good guy and will find a good mate soon, I hope. Thanks for the writing.

Ed

Really good tale, even if a little predictable. Maddy has certainly got at lot to do to ever convince Billy to get over it. I wonder if an author could do a credible story of a reconciliation. Many attempts but rarely

any successes here in LW. There is a wide array of possibilities that Billy could demand of her.

Good story!

5

4. It was a long but good story. The only complaint is the revenge was okay but the suicide was unexpected. Also despite its length I wanted more, hopefully there is future chapters. Reconciliation, new love, or something else (hopefully not fridging Wes) there is plenty of ways this can go and I look forward to it.

Really really entertaining and well written.

Please keep writing!

Just another of a husband. Should have had them get back together.

A little long but a grand story.

This could have been a really good story but I'm sorry author you Ruined it on page 8. At that point the husband knows what his wife is doing. He knows for a fact what the wife is doing.

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That evening when the wife finally comes home he attempts to have a conversation and she simply pushes him aside and Shut it down. The next time they tend to have a conversation she gets involved with a hysterical screaming match and he still doesn't get any answers.

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That's not the way things really work in the real world and if you're going to attempt to write a story that's based on realism you have to do a better job than that .

Enjoyed this story. Other commentators can nit-pick over this or that, but I found it an entertaining read. Good dialog and mostly believable characters. How can lujon say there was no revenge? Maddy lost her election, her self-respect, her wealthy husband, her sleazy boyfriend and her father. I'd say that's fairly burned. Robert blew his brains out and Tiffee is on the run. One commentator wrote that the Seattle Times would never enforce a Republican for DA, but the paper actually did enforce one this past year for City Attorney. So, our advice to Gumbo25 is to ignore the naysayers and give us another story like this one. Thanks for the entertainment.

Bill

I was uneasy about her from the very beginning, even though I also find intelligent, competent, independent women attractive. She just seemed awfully … calculating?

After a pretty long dry spell, a flood! Gumbo, BumblingFool, and moreandmore all drop stories. That’s the good news. The bad news is that I spent way too much time today reading. I really appreciated the extensive development of the MC…as well as the development of his relationship with Maddy. So, her betrayal was clearly painful. As always, the writing was strong (was taught an autocorrect for taut? The error was jarring.) But really! Shame on you! You drop the Chrissy character early, so when his world imploded, I figured that’s where the MC might find solace. Then, you bring her back and I was sure that I was right about how the story would end. But you were just toying with me/us…and didn’t wrap up the story in a nice bow. It did leave me chuckling at myself. Thanks!

I liked the story, a lot. A couple comments: First I’m a WSU graduate as us my dad and my cousin. We have Coug in our blood. My cousin’s husband went to the UW. One day a year, they sit on opposite ends of the couch to watch the game and yell at each other. The way you described the WSU-UW rivalry is right on. But it’s just a game. For someone to carry a losing grudge years later is just unhealthy.

And with Roberts house being located in Medina, makes me wonder if he was neighbors to Bill and Melinda Gates? Wish my dad had bought 100 shares of MSFT back in ‘75. Thanks for the read.

Didn't really have any revenge, did it?

Also, throughout the story, you had him recognize the warnings but do nothing over and over; not at all a fan of that style of the story because it comes across as lazy story building to me.

The reveal was terribly anticlimactic, and the end was just a whimper. You could have done better.

A Seattle newspaper endorsing a Republican political candidate??? Yeah,...about that?

But I totally get this point of view:

"I don't really care for any of them, Democrats or Republicans," I said knowing Robert was a hard line Republican. "I don't think any of them truly want to help the people they represent, they are more concerned about their own power."

Thank you! I hope there will be a part 2 where Billy finds love.

The bullshit about “loss of trust” is way overused in these stories. Especially when it is clear that it will never happen again. Call it as it is the fragile ego of the authors on this site having their male protagonists having to “own” the wife.

The story was great but long. The end was known when she stated how important trust was to her. Her affair with Tiffee was so obvious and Billy appeared stupid for allowing it to continue without taking action.

She lost her dream goal, lost out on his death, Massive burn on the father. Really needed no other revenge

Needs some editing, but it was okay. I'd make some snide remark about those backwoods types up in the Pacific Northwest and their Apple Cup, but that would be lost in the telling. I'll just say "Big Game" and "Go Bears" to get my point across. The story was okay, but I didn't think the part about him selling his company worked. An independent guy like that, his own boss, his own short work hours and dressing causally would have been too great a lure versus selling out. He was already rich and happy with his gig. Working for someone else, working regular hours and having to dress up just didn't seem right. And having the father-in-law commit suicide was just wrong. It's never the answer and seemed like a cheap way out. Next time a little shorter and it'll all be good. Thanks for the effort.

too much wind up and not enough of the pitch lujon2019 wtf no revenge are u kidding me lol the wife is ruined publicly the father shot himself and tifee is hospitalized and now running from the fbi good god man how much revenge do u need

I do hope there's a 2nd chapter

Wow great story.!

Good story. Seems like the post-election finish was a bit rushed compared to the pace of the rest of the story. The Richie-Dallas-John faction was maybe under-used given their development. Very good chsrsncters, interactions outstanding, a demanding red for a short story. Thank you.

Hmmm...

As it happens I have lived in Seattle all of my 72 years. As it further happens I was in the Seattle City Attorney's Office for 31 years. The last Republican city council member was Paul Kraabel, and that was about 15 years ago or more. The last City Attorney election was between a progressive Democrat and a true far-left type whose program was to stop prosecuting all property crimes. The progressive won and some sanity is being restored, but...

The idea of a Republican making the final two in a Seattle election for City Attorney is complete fantasy.

The story was good. The Husky/Couger thing is right on. Both my son and I are Huskies, and we both married Cougers. When they were just dating I started to make a mild "moo U" joke, and saw my son making quiet but urgent "stop" throat-cutting motions. Later he said "like most Cougers she is more sensitive to such japes than a Husky would be." I understood. The poor dears.

Very good story. Could have been 5*, but the length of the story stacked with unnecessary football prose gave me no other option than to give 4*.

I would like Maddie to have to explain herself more. She cared so much about trust yet betrayed her husband for months. On top of that, she "required " he be around her lover. An unknowing cuckold. A continuous humiliation. She also was outright rude and disrespectful to him for some time before he discovered her affair. She should have to answer for all of this. I'd also like to see a happy ending for Billy.

it couldn't be any shorter than it was or the story line would have to be changed well written

Great story but it bears out the old adage never marry a very beautiful rich woman that says TRUST ME (jaybee186)

Really good story, and the squatters were handled, if a little less than I would have done it.

Legalized theft is what squatters are. Easy way to get rid of them. If they were trying to take my property I would inform them they had 24 hrs to vacate or else. If they thought they were going to stay, well it would become painfully clear that the continuation of their bullshit was over and remaining or causing anymore shit would be more painful and might even be permanent. Fuck legal bullshit.....justice always works.

Where do I start? As a University of Washington English Major, I am pleasantly surprised by your story. Start was strong and I enjoyed it to the end. A couple of small details, the UW is the TE school, certainly not WSU and typically Wazzu grads wouldn't be comfortable in the corporate environment better you cast them in Animal Husbandry or Cheese Production. Probably some deep-rooted envy on your part but it didn't ruin my reading of your fine story. I'm allowed to say this as my father and my nephew played for the Cougs. I played a different sport for the UW.

Great story. Thanks for sharing.

Noooo! I love these longer stories. Much more intricate, involved and informative. Excellent story Gumbo and well expected. Excellent and you're a fine Author. I loved the story, even the twist that involved Chrissy being married. Gotta give this story another 5 BIG FAT BLAZING NOVA STARS and request that you continue with there longer stories, THANK YOU! And please, a second chapter would be great, I really like this Character.

Very much enjoyed this read! …well-written, and I hope their is more to come. Thank-you for this!

I enjoyed the story, gave you 5 stars. I thought the suicide was poorly conceived though. A person like his father-in-law wouldn't take his own life: he thinks too much of himself. Perhaps if he had sunk most of his personal fortune into his daughter's political race, thinking he'd make it back in spades once she was in office, yeah, maybe. But we know political people NEVER use their own money when they can use other's, so that would have been weak too.

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I never really became invested in their marriage, it seemed more like a business deal. Dating seemed to be crawling along, he wasn't sure how she felt about him and then, suddenly, she says she wants to get married because she loves him and needs him. I wasn't buying it, seemed more likely that Daddy told her it would be easier to be elected if she was married, so, voilà.

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It was a good story and, as I said, I enjoyed reading it. That's how I value the stories here, probably how most people do. It was a bit dry in spots, mostly the first four pages or so, but an entertaining read with a husband who behaves like a man and NOT like a floormat. Thanks for posting.

They don't come around all that often, but each one is a major event. Gumbo25 getting a QuickMagazine 5 should be no surprise. Loved the politics, despite what ForensicFossil wrote. It may be correct, but so what? This is fiction. BillandKate, who I adore, are, as usual, spot on. There was revenge in spades here, and the only thing lacking was a new love interest for our MMC. Also, B&K refuted FF - before FF's comment was posted!

Harry makes a good point in that Billy could/should have known what was going on at page 8. But then again, "When A Man Loves A Woman," loving eyes don't always see. The previous Gumbo yarn this shares a little with is "Found Money," mostly the house aspect and the FMC. Demander's remark that Billy won't be able to trust another woman is on point, and is typically how this author (Gumbo25) leaves things at the end. The fact that he doesn't in this one suggests that Billy may well prove an exception.

Second comment. Like others would love a follow up story. My new question is about her father. He has big political connections and enough money to fund a political campaign but he turns out to be a salesman? The way the story was written I thought he owned the company. Anyway the story left enough of an impression for me to make a second comment and that has to be a good thing - right?

Good story

Overall it was a good story but there are a couple of glaring errors. In the American political system District Attorneys prosecute criminals and they work for the State. City Attorneys give legal advice to city officials and represent the city in legal proceedings. They have nothing to do with being “tough on crime”. Also straw polls are not scientifically conducted and the results are meaningless.

Thank you for this and all of your stories. I'm a fan. :)

That being said, I just don't understand why the MC recognized the signs of Maddie's disrespect and affair and waited and waited while it progressed. I understand love can be blind, but he wasn't blind! It was obvious to him and others that something was very wrong well before the final reveal.

And the people in the wrong never get full comeuppance.

The father dies but Billy should have at least been able to tell him off and see him suffer longer while witnessing Billy's success first.

Tiffee is shown to be a criminal but escapes! What?! And he just gets a broken leg? Not enough! He deserved his a** kicked. If there will be a part 2 where he is captured and brought to task, fine. But if not, I really wish he would have also had to face Billy and the law in disgrace here. Maybe see Maddie turn on him. Or they turn on each other. Something!

As for Maddie, I truly wish she had had to answer for everything she did! All of the disrespect, betrayal and humiliation. Did she feel no guilt during this?! True remorse? She placed her husband around her lover continuously. Repeatedly let him down. Even her demeanor with him at home became atrocious.

Then she sees nothing wrong with sleeping with a man who holds her husband in contempt in his own bed! And she didn't know why Tiffee wanted to have sex at her house?! Yeah right. Give me a break. She's smart enough to know it was about the ultimate humiliation of her husband. Yet she HAPPILY did it anyway. She should be called on all that. Billy should have read her the riot act!

I'm normally a fan of deserved reconciliations but that will be tough here. Not impossible but very tough.

I hope there will be a follow-up story that wraps things up.

Thank you again.

Good story. Thank you

You write a great story. Thanks!

Very entertaining and great read. It had a bit of everything and I would love to see a second part.

Hopefully if a second part is done it’ll be by the original author and not by a bunch of hacks.

5* and thanks for a great effort

“…stairs the (taught) fishing line…” Unless polyester listens to Hubby Billy, the

word (a homophone) is ‘TAUT!’

A good story! Sweetie’s transition was very nicely done. Not immediate,

just one foot (week) at a time. The gin recollection moment was the

turn off the pot-holed dirt road onto NASCAR’s Daytona TriOval.

Big quibble was Hubby not admonishing Sweetie about pulling

lawyer tricks - using his first question to focus on their future family plans.

Another grinch is … Sweetie seemed to be presented as a better candidate for

City Attorney. Hubby got personal revenge. Seattle got screwed for another

term…or more! He could have asked for a rumor*article and maybe a

no-endorsement for that post. After the election the truth could be doled

out to keep the affair live for weeks (and good newspaper sales.) If she does

a really good job, a little tryst before election is small shit!

5* despite the gratuitous suicide.

* Campaign Manager was seriously injured at Candidate’s home. Hmm.

You can tell it's football(American) season. This one is better. Lot more foreplay than action but that happens.

All-in-all, a good yarn. 5*

Great job! I always enjoy a good story of any length.

Your take on the uw vs wsu rivalry/attitude was right on point...go cougs!!!

Powerful, principled, and very well told.

Bundy was a huskie! Go Cougs!

Great story. I really enjoyed it. Thanks!

Thank you for an entertaining story. I can't wait to read more of your work

Agree. The story is too long for the small plot it has. The plot is not original but it is well written.

When a story gets so long without a good reason it just makes a reader more frustrated. I was skimming last three pages.

The "Robert" character's suicide does not square. These types of arrogant bullies do not kill themselves, only depressed people do, the US is not Japan.

3 stars.