All Comments on 'Therapy'

another great one. so proud of you babydoll

all the sex is going to your head kitten. Loving what it is doing to your imagination

hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot hot

keep it up babe, loving every word

mmmm, now I think I need some therapy.

This needs a part 2 asap

That was a great build-up.

I respect that like your first work, this seems to be a direct transcription from mind to page. With some editing, I feel it could be fleshed out into a compelling story in its own right. The initial progression is a bit helter-skelter and the seduction comes on a little fast: a slower pace, more detail to their emotions would help the mutual crush read more naturally than what currently feels like a shortcut to get to the sex. I'm also more than a little surprised how casually the subject of rape is treated: I'm not expecting victim porn, but I would think something that significant would have a thematic purpose within the story, rather than a one-and-done factoid.

Make no mistake: your prose shows promise. Keep practicing, and consider tapping one of this site's editors for coaching; I think you'll go far.