All Comments on 'famine'

Best of the three you had posted 12/01/07. First, a small suggestion. IMO the first line might be better if it stood alone, or better yet, were to be omitted. I can see where you might want the contrast of strength that line implies in opposition to the desolation that comes through in the rest of the poem, but, it seems that contrast is implied {without tire} just as well without that first line. Just a thought.<br>

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My favorite lines are:<br>

"crossed oceans of ashes<br>

within wastelands of fire,"<br>

for the way you turn convention on its head by using ashes instead of fire and fire instead of ashes. One would normally expect to see it phrased like this:<br>

<i>crossed oceans of fire<br>

within wastelands of ashes,</i><br>

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All in all, a most pleasurable read despite its rather gloomy nature.<br>

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This poem was mentioned in Saturday's New Poems Reviews.

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