All Comments on 'Across That Line'

This was certainly an investment to read - and not something to rush through.

I can't say I loved the story line but it certainly was well done. I guess if you make them eat cake until they get sick of it works once in a while; sort of aversion therapy.

His plan worked ... but did he create a monster?

I'll give you a hundred for your writing skills, another hundred for your imagination and perseverance and seventy-five for the story line.

Sorry, Longhorn, you only get 275 from me!

Kind regards, Jack

As good as your other works though I still like Lying Eyes the best. I wish it had been in three or five parts.

Boyd

but an interesting story. I know he really suffered terribly while 'manipilating' Ashley.

I'm not sure that his having repeated sex with others would turn her off of the scene. She would just look for the next stud that came along instead of 'tiring' of it all, I'm sure. But it's a good storyline.

There were sure a lot of words that were hard to follow,that said little and went nowhere.There were all the things that make up a cheating slut wife story;slut wife,stupid wimp hudband,other men,other women,and an orgey at a hotel.But it never got there.Longhorn,this was not one of your best.Take it out and try adain.

Good writing, a few grammatical blunders that didn't get caught in the proofread. It's tolerable in a story this long (just barely though ;).

The characters are nicely done and they grow from their experiences in the story, Bradley in particular. I suppose one complaint is that I found Ashley's character a bit strange at the beginning. As a two-time divorcee, I think she'd be much more cynical. To be sure, she's manipulative and self-centered and that goes a long ways towards explaining why her previous marriages failed. Bradley's reasons why he married Ashley are less obvious but the author cleans up this little mystery when the story concludes. We see that Bradley isn't the supergood guy that we thought: in his own way, he's manipulative and self-centered just as his wife is but in a good way. He knows what he wants and he works tirelessly to achieve his aims. He's not vindictive nor impatient with Ashley but he's willing to step close to the fire and risk being burned to teach her a lesson in life.

I guess other people will see it differently but I thought that expressed his love for her far more than the three little words ever could. It made me respect him because of the chance that he took that it could all blow up in his face.

I think I am critical of Ashley's change of heart with respect to swinging because, like Nightowl22, I don't see why she lost interest in the lifestyle. Her turn on was fucking new men so did she just run out of new partners? Was that why she burned out? There's nothing to suggest that her sex life with Bradley outside the swinging parties was anything less than good. In fact, I'd guess he was better at fucking and sucking from all the experience he got while swinging.

I suppose she grew secretly jealous and when her own excitement from swinging faded, she lost interest in it. That's certainly consistent with her character: she's still the same manipulative and self-centered person at the end of the story as she was at the beginning. When swinging no longer held any interest for her, she was more than happy to pull the plug even if her husband had begun to enjoy the lifestyle. Ashley's not an evil person but she's definitely not someone I'd want my kids to see as a role model because she puts what she wants first, ahead of anything or anyone else.

The author fights a tough battle to keep the story interesting, striving to maintain good narrative drive. Longhorn__07 mostly succeeded, I think. I never felt the anticipatory rush to get the end of the tale sooner rather than later but neither was I yawning with boredom. The author's pacing was pretty good in that respect.

I have to say that I thought the story's hook was a little contrived and that was mildly irritating. Honestly, I would've enjoyed the opening a bit more if the swingers' convention at the hotel had been a total surprise. The author wanted us quickly to see Ashley for who she was and I thought he rushed it. He had time to show her to us and to let us see Bradley's character as he reacts to what she does but he needn't have been in such a hurry IMO. It didn't damage the story a lot but it could've been better.

I find it interesting that the true central conflict in the story--Ashley's self-centeredness--was never resolved. Oh, the author resolved the superficial conflict in the tale (her desire to swing vs. her husband's desire not to) but the real conflict in the story remains. Bradley deals with her in ways that are painful but necessary and Ashley does learn, at least a little, what it's like to be manipulated by someone else. It's a fascinating exploration that doesn't strain credibility while the characters remain true to themselves.

Excellent fiction this is. This 100's for you, Longhorn__07, for a story well-told. I thank you.

P.S. Hook 'em! The Aggies are coming to town and I can't wait to see the Horns put the leather to 'em. :D

Nice to have Longhorn back writing again.

As usualy his stories have time to develop and deal with emotions (right or wrong).

I hope he keeps writing.

What I saw was a man who was prepared to sacrifice some of his self-respect for his marriage. He saw his wife's weakness and he dealt with it. The comparison to addiction was apt.

I think the word addiction is used too loosely. In fact in professional circles it's no longer used. Now they talk about drug abuse and drug dependence.

What we have here is the sort of obsession that is frequently labeled addiction. The wife had been so beaten down that she only saw herself successful in a sexual role. She couldn't resolve that with her desire to be faithful and a loving wife. She didn't actually understand that someone could want her for who she was.

Certainly, she remembered the "buzz" she got from a new sex partner and since she hadn't actually loved her husband she didn't understand the down side of swinging.

The real tragedy of the story is that while the couple finally moved to good place the experience diminished both of them.

I don't understand why folks complain about a long story. Personally, I'd like to see this one continue. If the story is well written and the plot good why end it? The very first series I read were the Hornblower books. I don't know how many there are, but I'm so sorry the author died and didn't continue.

I don't know that I'd rate Longhorn up there with Forester, but I certainly wanted more of this story. I just feel lucky that I'm getting publishable quality work for free.

Planning on being there when the Horns explain to the Aggies why they are THE University. Also cursing the stupid BCS computers!

...about nothing. Started with a 'bang' and ended with a 'fizzle'. The only reason I gave it a 25 was because the husband turned the tables on the wife who was so given in to her "mental condition" in the beginning.

Got to part 703 of I can't guess how many and gave up. It was the tight trousers that finaly killed it for me.

I am curious though: do swingers' clubs really exist? The idea seems pretty gross to me and the convention at the beginning surely has to be a porn writer's invention; nobody could keep a straight face never mind a straight cock! It's firemen who have conventions.

While I may have read hotter "scenes" in individual stories, (though if you get through the story there was a great variety) I think the character development and story leave most of what I've read here in the dust. The length of some of the segments seemed a tool to make you feel the length of the process/time elapsed. Nice to see some questions/challenges re: the lifestyle that don't assume one answer.

Good twist and summation at the end. Fantastic effort obvious.

THANK YOU.

Longhorn you have a good story you should have an editor check your spelling I hope Brad and and ash get through there problems im irish at birth and i know how he feels when ash left him in the first chapter when she walked of with those other people i would have done the same thing he did but I would have divorced her when she got back home from her ignorance and heartlesnes for not thinking of him and his feelings for his feelings.

Pat Murray

Atlanta,Ga.

Longhorn you have a good story you should have an editor check your spelling I hope Brad and and ash get through there problems im irish at birth and i know how he feels when ash left him in the first chapter when she walked of with those other people i would have done the same thing he did but I would have divorced her when she got back home from her ignorance and heartlesnes for not thinking of him and his feelings for his feelings.

Pat Murray

Atlanta,Ga.

I got a short way down page two and almost threw up, Brad is a fucking moron and a pussy, just like Longhorn, you discrace the state of Texas, move to France, you pussy.

But then again, I like all of Longhorn's stuff. The level of detail, characters and insights are always top notch. This story didnt have the sustained emotional content of some of his others but it was still very good. Thanks very much for writing.

PS - I also liked the happy ending.

Loved it. Well written intricate with good plot twists...

usually its the Hubby that is all "ga ga" over the swinging "ideal" and the wife is reluctant to try te swinging shit (at least in 98% of all Lit swinging stories). Then she wants all the cock she can get and he withdraw...

I loved how LONGHORN showed how the swinging idea is all bullshit... where in these clubs the Woman/ wives are super aggressive yet the Man/ Husband characters can only have 1 or 2 women approved by the wife...

I think Joesphus post was brillant but then again That guy is one smart cookie and a great writer. ASHLEY had no sense of herself outside of SEX... and she was correct in saying she did't kno HOW to a married person.

I loved the ending bit about who Manipulated whom... Did BRAD really Manipulate his wife?

This leads me to a MUCH bigger Problem I had with this story. All Brad was really trying to do was attempting to find SOME level of sexual activity where her kinky side might be "satisifed"... while still being a good loving wife.

By page 3 and 4 Brad knows his wife is Fucking Nuts. IF he accepts her assertion she zoned out at Dallas ... to allow all that happened there.. then she has SERIOUS mental issues. If BRAD doesnt accept that BS then she is a liar. In either case she lies often and repeatedly about major things

This I ask ... WHY bother? In other words I dont see why BRAD decieded that HE was the one to try and "fix" ASHLEY's sexual / mental issues. Why didnt they/ she go for counselling... or at least Try it ?

if they had tried therapy and she was still stepping out or engaged in swinging or talking about it... THEN I could see as a last resort BRAD come up with this plan...

Still a great story and different

One of the advantages of a long story is that an author can fully develop the characters and explore their emotions in detail. Longhorn_07 has done a very good job with this short novel. The subject of going to a swing club, one spouse eager and the other reluctant, is a common one. It is also a subject that is hard to deal with. Those in that lifestyle don't like it when they are portrayed in a bad light and those who are not in the lifestyle condem those who are. It can sometimes be a lose/lose situation for an author. However, Longhorn_07 took the time to to create the mental and emotional conflict that is so lacking in a lot of the work on this site. I applaud him for that. This story drew the reader in and got him/her involved with the characters. I found myself wondering what I would do if I was in his shoes at several points and then I would wonder what I would do if I was in her shoes. This is the type of writing I fully enjoy. Thank you, author, for sharing.

all day to finish reading it since I had to stop and start a million times. You do spin a great tale. And even if I saw it conming it was still a great ending. God I love all types of endings when they come like this one did.

Very intersting. You gave enough hints throughout to show what Brad was doing, but that last section where he worries about himself. That gave the story an entirely new twist. It was a nice take on how far a guy will go to make a marriage work. I may not agree, but I could see it happening.

The previously credible loving father of her children missed an opportunity to remain true to himself and his previous values by writer decree.

In doing so at great length and many pages, the writer spent much time lowering him to her skunky level or below in the conclusion for what purpose? Forcing her to smoke carton after carton doesn't mean she won't again be so selfish as to cuckold him again then where is the plus in his new self respect level? Again I ask - to what purpose?

Here's what not to do or how to create a story of people who shouldn't be around young children to avoid infection of the soul and body.

Writer - I feel you are too good for this time spent where at the end there is nothing or no one of any value to compensate for the time invested - for both of us.

Now if that was your intent - well done.

The story was long enough for full character developement. Brad and Ash were given distinct personalities and, within the theme of the story, were driven by goals that were in conflict with one another.

Ashley wanted to resume her swinging lifestyle so she could feel a real rush and tingle of anticipation at the chance of each new encounter. We learn that at the age of 23 she has been married and divorced twice, the second marriage occuring only because of pregnacy, and was led into the lifestyle as an outgrowth of a loveless marriage.

We also see that by the end of her first year with Brad she is lying to him about the convention and continues to lie by concealing her internet involvement with the swinging lifestyle. She then proceeds to nudge Brad to ever more expansive sex play with the ultimate goal of returning to swinging.

On the other hand, Brad is portrayed as loving, caring, slow to anger, thoughtful, and smart. He is not a stud but is more attractive to women than he thinks. He carries no false humility but does take pride in himself. His goal is to construct a plan that will result in Ashley abandoning a swinging lifestyle forever.

Brad's plan works because of Ashley's love for him and her fear of losing him to swinging. At least I think that is the reason the plan worked. I don't feel that this was explained very well because we were given too little of her thought process. Other then some fairly vague comments of disquietude at not having as much of Brad as she had in the past there is remarkably little that shows why her attitude changed.

Also, as another commentator mentioned, since she now could have sex with anyone at the Green Door or at private parties it would seem that she had achieved her goal. I thought the story should have contained some descriptions of her having sex with other men and then describing Brad's reaction to what he saw. Was she really getting into it? Did she want more sex with numerous partners and if so, why did this change? The story followed Brad at this point but neglected Ashley.

Despite the above comments I thought the story was excellent. Longhorn 07 deserves to be commended for his effort.

Very good entertainment.

I don’t like the amateur take on if they want to smoke make them smoke a whole pack till they throw up but it is an old adage of more is too much. The after effects are not as forgivable as it has taken the real love and reduced its meaning forever. By not facing the issue but just both jumping in the pile has just made it enough for now. Nothing is resolved just delayed at best. When does the boredom come back and the good parts are remembered and the bad feels so inconsequential. Hey we did it for a while and stopped we can do it just one more time and my spouse will go along, why not just have a little fun.

Once under a dependency always a dependant person of addiction. Only with an ongoing dialogue about what was really lost and gone forever can you see how a return would more then likely kill what is left of trust and love. It would be on the verge of being an empty love just a marriage of time not love. Have your own little SW (AA) meeting frequently to keep the swinging addiction at bay.

Thank you for this great extensive amount of work.

PT

This story makes a great fantasy because I am sure that no man who loved Ashley like Brad did would ever take the risks he took to turn her around. For example, as much as she loved sex some lover (male or female) could have turned her on that she would have had to had more of that person. Also, gang bangs was one of the things she did early on but she did not engaged in them with Brad (why not?). Further, the couples rule seems to have been broken by Brad when they went to the house party and he paired up with several females at one time (not addressed).

The device you used to drive Ashley away from swinging was to make Brad a sex god so by comparison her antics seemed shallow. You also removed exciting suitors to give her this rush she carved in the beginning. I liked that fact that in the end they came clean about the games they were both playing on each other. Secrets like that would doom a marriage.

Long wait for this story but worth it. Thanks!

SleeplessinMD

Okay - Longhorn I read this twice ... the scond time was better, I changed my rating FROM 75% to 100%

emotions, plot twist AND your usual tendency of writing and forcing the reader to reflect on their position (i.e. what if I was Brad??)

certainly introspective -- a great read by a great writer.. missed you while you were gone..

Even though it was very long, it was extremely involving. The opening scene, with Ashley abandoning her husband in the hotel, was amazingly powerful, and created momentum for the rest of the story.

It seemed to me that the process of Ashley changing, from a woman eager (even desperate) to rejoin the swinging lifestyle to a woman thoroughly sick of it, was not as clear to me as it might have been. I inferred that in part it was jealousy of how much sex, and how much female attention, her husband was getting. But this important transition seemed a little vague.

Still, my hat is off to you for such a long and compelling story. Readers who are not also authors may not have any idea how much time and work and thought goes into something like this. Thank you so much for it--and we all look forward to your next work!

Best, ohio

This story at first baffled and flabbergasted me. I read the first two pages, and was surprised that even a good author could manage to take such an unpromising premise and extend it to such lengths. It seemed clear to me that the marriage was more than just in trouble, it was over. She lied to him about her plans, abaondoned him for swinging acquaintances, and locked herself away from him in order to do who-knows-what. It seemd like a familiar plot. When the confession scene comes, the husband makes it clear they need to have a lies-free relationship. And then she begins lying to him about her interest in swinging all over again. What does he do now? He's made it abundantly clear that he demands complete clarity in the marriage and he has no interest at all in orgiastic sex or swinging, while she conceals herself from him and secretly longs to return to the thrills of abandoned sex with strangers. In theory, he should just walk away. No one would be surprised, no one would condemn, because she's demonstrated an inability to meet his fundamental terms for marriage. Her marital history implies that she's a broken woman, filled with selfish desires and poor ideas of what marriage should be, and the incident at the hotel demonstrated the power of her obsession over her behavior and thinking.

This is where it gets both interesting and disturbing. Rather than making a break with her and establishing himself as a man of rectitude, he begins to attempt to live with his wife as she is, forgiving the lies and public humiliation which began the story. He's aware of his wife's vulnerabilities, and worries about what he can do to keep her from falling into a pattern of indulgence again. He has immediate cause for worrying - an incident at a hotel reveals the depth of his wife's sexualization of everyday life, her interest in the sexual possibilities outside of marriage for her husband as well as himself. Her lascivious description of the coeds' thinking about her husband was painfully over the top. She begins encouraging public display, flirting, and public displays of desire. He realizes that her obsession has not gone away, and that she needs the sexual attention of others to araouse and fulfill her. What does he do?

This is why I titled my comment as I did; this story powerfully reminded me of a little-considered aspect of the Genesis story of Mankind's fall. It's a tiny part, where Eve, having eaten the forbidden fruit, gives some to Adam. Imagine the scene: his wife has taken the step on her own away from him and their life together. She's eaten the fruit, and she'll never be the same. She turns to him, a new look on her face, juice perhaps dribbling down her chin, (let's be traditionalists here) the smell of sour apples on her breath, and offers him the fruit to eat, knowing what it will do to him. What can he do? Their marriage is irrevocably changed no matter what he does. If he obeys the rules and refuses, she's lost to him and he to her, separated by the gulf of knowledge and disobedience. If he follows her lead into a new life, they will have a new relationship, built in part on their shared disobedience and her desires for something she shouldn't have. His only hope for having any part of her is to follow he into the wilderness of the possibility of evil, and he does so willingly, guessing at the terrible cost, but valuing her too much to relinquish her to a lonely fate. And that's the approach Brad takes, to try and salvage the marriage by trying (I think) to find substitutes for his wife's lust for sex with outsiders. It's a brave, loving, and ultimately wrongheaded act. By encouraging her by engaging in flirting, roleplaying with unwitting strangers, and watching porn, he's just enlfaming her obsession and pulling both of them closer to entering "the lifestyle." She's going to cross that line, with him or without him. Now, having failed by indulging her interests to keep her from pulling him into a practice he's made clear he despises, he faces the second choice: will he go with her across that line? Without confrontation or discussion, they do cross the line and become swingers. On a side note, I found the interview with the slimy club owner enlightening. He's absolutely clear that the swinging lifestyle is designed to give women the power in sexual relationships, by removing the female reluctance to have random sex, the women in the club become the rulers of the sexual arena, especially when there are more men than women available. Once a woman's reluctance to put herself and her marriage at risk are overcome, she has all the power in her relationship with her husband. This may or may not have been a driving force for Ashley's interest, but it's there.

Why become swingers? Eve ate that fruit and she can't go back, and Ahley can't seem to leave her desire to swing either. It's truly Brad's love for her that brings him in - he's convinced that if he stays with her, he will have to fight this desire of hers for the rest of his life unless he can find a cure. Trying a substitute didn't work. He seems to think that immersion in swinging will cause Ashley to see what damage it can do to their relationship, so that she can learn to flee from her obsession. This part, where they go deeper and deeper into "the lifestyle," is a bit confusing. It's clear that Ashley is having second thoughts about sharing her husband. What isn't clear is how Brad is taking it. And that's relistic, I think. He started out by thinking he could just go through the motions and try to let his wife figure it out, but it looks like he's become a real swinger. It's possible that he's playing a very deep game, deliberately showing her what it looks like to him by going to extremes, but I suspect that the player has in part become the game. He's over the line too. There are moments (like when he sows Viagra and discord) when it's clear that he still loathes what he's doing at some level, but we all can loathe what we've become, and that doesn't change anything. As he enters deeper and deeper into swinging, his wife becomes more and more jealous of his popularity. What appears to be the case is that she wanted the freedom to swing while her husband satisfied himself with limited contact, but her husband's "hunkiness" (coupled, it's implied, with dangerous amounts of erection-inducing drugs) makes him more popular than she is. She gets crabby and sad, and gets less and less enjoyment from her swinging. Other commenters have found this puzzling, but I think it makes sense: she's not the center of attention, her husband is, and she does love him, and therefore doesn't really want to share him with a whole group of acquaintances. Her first experiences were with a man she didn't really love, and it sounds like she was the power broker he first time around. When she is powerless, the thrill begins to go away, and she finds the sex itself uninteresting. And she's now in a terrible position; she pushed her husband into swinging, and now he's a rock star. He doesn't need her at all, and she can only beg for him to return to her alone. Rather than the thrills of novelty sex, she wants the security of commitment, and the relationship which is centered on more than just "the slipperl friction of mucus membranes." Apparently, this is what he's been waiting for, and tells her it's either all-swinging or all-monogamy. She chooses monogamy with gratitude.

If it had ended there, I would have rated the story quite low, despite being well-written. The thought of a purely "happily ever after" ending on such an extreme story without some But the epilogue provides a nice view on the consequences of the action. Both of them reflect on the process of manipulation and deception that had brought them, ironically, to a form of peace. It isn't until he's musing at the end that we get the true story - Brad has brought his wife back, she's happy, she's secure in her marriage, but he's bearing the burden and the scars of swinging. Looking at the neighbor, he KNOWS how seducing her would feel, that he can seduce her, that she's probably inviting it. The months of experiencing all those women have taken their toll on him, and he knows temptation in a way he never did before. He ate the apple, he crossed the line, and he doesn't know how to go back. In my mind, this marriage my be doomed.

The trap he fell into was assuming that he had to solve the problem alone, and that the surfeit theory would work for him. This was Adam's trap too - he could not imagine another way out, so he ate the fruit. Brad could have confronted her and asked her to enter counseling to try to learn how to manage her obsession. Like Adam in Genesis, he would have had to trust in an unknown providence for assistance, and like Adam, he chose to trust himself. Now, having come to the point where the roles in the marriage are nearlt reversed, his only hope for lasting peace will have to come from realizing he's no better off than she was before and honestly seeking assistance. Gritting his teeth will only go so far, and their relationship is still broken, albeit differently.

Bravo for that ending. Realizing the cost he paid to redeem his wife, and making it explicit, redeemed the story itself.

I think you write some wonderful stories and this is one of them. The first three or four pages are wonderfully written with Ashley's attempt to retun to swinging and Brad's determination to avoid it. His departure from the hotel,leaving her with her friends is brilliant, but, in Brad's attempt to convert Ashley, the story goes downhill and,to me, drags to a disappointing conclusion. 60 year old George

start the story,she disrespects and he lose trust in her.did he leave her,but he taught her a lesson in how to be a good wife.now who got gounds for divorce.you make him weak as a man.

but too long an the ending utterly predictable.

why did it take her a full day to get back home ?

This story was great, but if my wife had a friend like Marge I'd say keep that bitch completely out of our lives. Marriage is hard enough of a job, without some crazy bitch putting negative vibes in their relationship. Anyway good job! With very high regards. Luis

but well written and well thought out as others have said. I just have one question. When the couple has the first actual "swinging" experience in the hot tub, our "hero" has a condom rolled over his penis before having intercourse with his partner. Yet when he climaxes, his semen "splashes" against her vaginal walls as if there were no condom. Other than that bit of confusion, the story read consistently and smoothly. An excellent piece of work.

Guess it was a variation of the "so you wanna smoke?!? Well I'll make you smoke so much you'll never want to smoke again" theme but with sex :)

Unless I missed something, Marge was introduced in Chapter 12 as an offstage foil to reveal Brad's manipulations to Ashley. She was never seen earlier as far as I could find. Thing is, no Marge was really needed. Ashley was quite capable of figuring out Brad's plan on her own.

Now I've read all your stories including a re-read of Requital. Now with better understanding because auf my improving english skills I'am convinced. Your stories are somehow outstanding. It's a great pleasure to read though your stories are quite long. I know no particular point at which I would have lost my interest to read any further. Thank you. Great entertainment. Keep on ... you know ;-)

<p>Sincere regards</p>

<b>Nucleus</b>

An excuse for being a swinger camouflaged as morals & love makes me so f*ng tired. You want people to believe that swingers is the way to go? That's ok with me, but don't camouflage it like this. It sucks. And the story line too. Cheers Yoron.

If you want to write books get a publisher.

Outstanding. I'm sad to see it's been two years since your last post. Please keep writing. You have some of the best stories on literotica.

After the first two chapters, the only logical ending was for him to leave her in the end to give her a true feeling about what she had done to him with the lies, disrespect and abandonment.

A wife like this guy has is a very serious problem. She is an outright slut for anyone and he didnt want to. Any decent swingers would not really touch them. Of course there are those assholes that will fuck anything with a hole. Her walking off with the couple and leaving her husband is as clear of a declaration of war as could be heard. She said I am going to do this and fuck you. His only reaction possible, had he been who you portraited, was to say fuck you and leave. Story would have ended on page one but been much more realistic and honorable. Sure sounds like one of the hotels in Houston with the club's annual New Years Eve Party. Been there done that.

I liked this story. It started very well having brought together a newly web couple with interesting and contrasting lifestyles. Brad tried and succeeded in turning Ashley's swinging lifestyle around to the point that she yearned for the straight life she, and Brad showed he could be the stud at the swinger's clubs gatherings (Ashley was not at all happy about this). Also, Brad was the family the hero; she became the devoted follower to her husband. The story is difficult to red, and sometimes to follow, this in large measure due to the frequent descriptions of sexual encounters at local swingers clubs and various homes. I feel there were too many such encounters to the point that towards the end of the story I had become tired with reading it - whereas Ashley had lost her enthusiasm for the swinger's lifestyle. But this story is a giant among stories in Loving Wives, of this there's no doubt. RAG

I've read Ur stories Requital and Fool me once. they were real page turner. Coming to this story, I really loved 2 things in here 1 is Brad's clear thought process and the 2nd is the manipulation part. I wish i could be as clear in what i think and what i do as Brad is. Believe it or not I'm some what of a psychoanalysis guy my self . The slang word I'd use for what Brad did was called "Gross 'em out". the Only criticism I'd like to make is U could have made a bit more Interesting and racy. But Be assured It's still a moving piece.

After Dallas, this story should have ended quickly with a divorce. Everything after Dallas was "Alice in Wonderland" crazy.

.

Not the usual loving wife story and thank you for that. Great how the hubby played the long game instead of just throwing the wife out.

thanks.

That, for someone to leave a negative comment, they have to either flick all the way to the end- in which case they're a troll- or they read the entire thing, which is exactly what Longhorn wanted anyway; if someone hates your story, but they read all the way to the end of a 15 page novella, then you're clearly doing something right.

I liked the story, but while I feel it had merit as a story I had an issue with the ending. I think you betrayed the readers a bit with Brad's manipulation, insofar as despite the length of this piece Brad is a very simple character, with obvious motivations and morals- morals he had to completely destroy to get his wife back.

I could also have done with- and I have no doubt I will get some rolled eyes at least for this- more pages, more words. I didn't like the ending on a song, nor the symmetry of his wanting to swing now that he had cured her of her addiction. As, in all of your stories (that I have read, at least) the men seem to always get the last say, and the better of their wives, couldn't you have written about how Ashley wins back her husband, manipulating him in return?

Again, thank you for a good read.

I loved Brad's manipulation of Ashley. I also liked the ending, because it shows that if you get your hands dirty, they may never get clean.

Good story. I suppose there are men out there who would be willing to take on a woman with all the baggage rather than someone who might bear their own children.

A great story - one of my favorite swinging stories - that was appropriately long. A refreshing change from the all to cliched "okay, let's become swingers...that'll fix everything!"

The sex as drug was well developed as was the tepid immersion in the "lifestyle" he'd rather avoided. Curiously, one of my favorite scenes; Raul, raging on Viagra, howling "Live with that woman!" Classic.

My only hmmm - WHO THE FUCK IS MARGARET? It seems that a scene (or three) is missing between the collapse in the street and the confessions over the chaise. Suddenly a character who is accusing harmful manipulation and advising divorce pops up - is she a friend? therapist? coworker? WTF is that all about?

Anyway - great story.

Pile of unmitigated shit. What kind of asshole writes a story like this. Oh, that's right..an asshole.

This sotry should have ended in chapter four with a divorce. The restof the story wasnot worth the reading.

I once heard the way to get a kid to stop smoking was to make him or her smoke a whole pack in one sitting. This story could be an extension of the same idea. How great that his love for her made it possible for him to find a way to wean her away from her addiction for swinging.

In response to the comment asking why any guy would take on another woman's kids, I did it and have never had a regret. Sometimes a woman is well worth the extra effort it takes to bring her kids into your life. And some people take fiction too seriously.

That was truly excellent - it was pretty clear where he was going but certainly whether or not it would workout.

You built a really nice exploration in to the mind of an addict - any addict - they all have the same primary motivations.

To build a male character that was able to figure out the route to the best end was perfect. He loved her the kids and the their life and was willing to do whatever it took to keep them.

As for the nonsense about not taking a woman with kids - who cares if she has kids - assuming you have any father in you, not just testosterone driven ownership needs. Every adopted kids has some else's genes in them but it does not stop great families from developing. morons.

Thanks again for a great read - a well written one too -

He KNEW that he was hot enough to burn through a lot of ladies. He knew that she would tire of the lifestyle. Hmm.

That is the only point I think was sort of a stretch. Otherwise well done.

to keep the creampies coming! My addiction to creampies is my only motivation. Basing our marriage on spying promotes my cuckhood (I'm one of those guys that like hiding in the closet watching my wife take strange cock while wanking my tiny pee pee).

Wonderful mind trip into the world of willing cuckolds and creampie fetishists, thanks for a well written tome on the joys of cuckhood!

Wimp Ass husband and wife that is at best a life support system for her Cunt. You wrote them perfectly and were able to garner a miniscule amount of pity for each from me. Absolutely loved the emotions you evoked in me while reading the story. At the end of the day that's the best any writer could expect. Liking or disliking Plots and characters is totally subjective and no writer can please us all BUT to get us mad or happy or railing against your Characters well THAT'S MAGIC!! Well done seriously well done

Many of us have stayed in unhappy marriages for the sake of the kids but I would never have put up with that crap. I'm glad it worked out (yes, I realize that it is just a piece of fiction).

you are the best writer at this site. you really know how to keep a story going. your writing is being missed. we havent seen anything from you in years..if you read this please write again..

This is just another example of your great story writing ability. Please keep it up.

Despite "glowing" comments, this is still a cuckolded wimp story. Still a slut whore wife story.

Someone missing a shoe? Looking for some fish? Doesn't matter I guess since that want to be cuck knows shit about writing; shit, the cuckold can barely read. No way I would have taken her back but it is your story and you wrote the hell out of it. Nice work.

OH GOD MY CAPS LOCK I SMOKE COCK PLEASE HELP MY CORNHOLE IS SORE FOR THE LOVE OF HEAVEN HELP ME PLEASE

This was a real piece of shit !!!!!!!!!!

really do have problems with forgiveness, don't they ?

to forgive - you have to be the strong one

a good story 5 stars

and i gave it a 5. but in real life her walking in to fuck strangers leaving him standing there would have ended the marriage. fucking other people can never make a marriage stronger, that is not a marriage. good read but fucking strangers time after time and then hpoing you dont get a little surprise, or she gets pregnant with someone elses baby. not a matter of forgiveness, it's a matter of having or not having brains.

well written.

I wish Longhorn was still writing.

This one had it all, including the happy ending, and the provacative closing line.

what happened on that night she stayed in Dallas?

I loved this story but I feel bad for him. Love must be a terrible burden. He helped his wife but lost a piece of himself in the process. Love your story though.

well written but when you come down to it - just another cuck story with two assholes instead of one.

Ill give it a 4.

The issue i have is over that summer and fall when he was trying to swing the swingin out of her. What did they do with the kids every weekend?

Did they just disappear?

summer camp?

Seems a bit off....

Other than that... he should have had the divorce paperwork started as soon as he arrived (or from the phone on the way) from that 1st trip to the hotel.

The disrespect and downright contempt she showed him in that hotel lobby was enough for a divorce.

still... a good read. * * * *

To show he is a wimp.

A waist of my time??

bill

gave it a 1too long no plot, cuck wimp pussy, if it turns your crank to write shit enjoy it.

it just dragged on on, no surprise just kept sinking into shit claiming love all the way.

"The jury, composed of all the faceless men she'd met and had sex with in those swinger clubs, would render a verdict sooner or later on his worth as a male animal...and he feared the indictment would be upheld. No matter what he did, he was certain he could never measure up in Ashley's eyes."

That is so dead on. Beautiful.

I was getting confused by his actions for a while, until the end revealed his true intentions. Thanks.

read this crap. yucold

waaaayyyyy too long

Al in wtfdFA

UGH how did you not fall asleep writing this shit? I gave up after page 3.

Two fuck'd up people who doesn't know what love and marriage consist of. She's a whore & he's a wimp, she fucks guys after guys & he goes home & eat that cesspool she calls a pussy. These two never should've gotten married, he gets this epiphany to let her fuck her need for different cock out of her system-- but this need should've evaporated when she pledged to love honor & cherish, I understand that he was fighting for his marriage but the fight is useless when she's not willing to fight for their marriage. By him joining the swinging life with her made the marriage a joke-- fucking other people doesn't make a marriage stronger. What these two had was not a marriage-- I don't know what the fuck it was----- but a marriage wasn't it. Marriage is a union between 2 people not a house full of freaks fucking others. I'm a little grossed out that he actually was eating out these women knowing other men has been there and left deposits. I'm a woman & I don't find cream pies erotic at all I think it's disgusting & very disrespectful. During all this these two idiots kept pledging their love for one another, I don't think either of them know what love is. I agree with most this story was way too long-- 15 pages of bullshit, a man with no self respect & a selfish whore-- why was 15 pages needed ( which I didn't read by the way I skipped all the way to page 13--I skimmed this story before) she's a slut & he stayed married to her instead of throwing her dirty ass to the curb the night she abandoned him in Dallas. 15 pages wasn't necessary .

You pick &quot;Danger&quot; as your nickname on a sex story site.

Gay Male &gt;&gt;&gt; thattaway peterpuffer.

If you're smart enough to follow the underlying plot. Definitely, a lot more interesting than the ole "I caught her cheating and made her pay" story. Of course you have to be a little open minded when it comes to recognizing that there is a swinging culture even if you don't agree with it. I read the comments and get a sense that people (men) on this site look at relationships (marriage) just like plastic products. If there is a flaw get mad and stomp on it until it's in a hundred tiny pieces. Then just throw it away and buy another. It's easier than trying to fix it and there are plenty more. Pretty short sighted. Great Story, excellent writing, great idea. The procedure used here by Brad is called "satiation". I'm not sure it would work with drug addiction but that's why I like paper psychology, it's so cheap and entertaining.

Good story line; very good plot development. I've graded creative writing for over 20 years - this one kept me reading all the way through. Ignore those comments out of other's misguided mores; that's the vulnerability you must accept when you write. I'll check in again on your work.

Several times I almost quit reading in irritation at his attitude until I remembered I had suffered the same humiliation and stayed in our marriage--it wasn't sexual but merely inordinate regard for her sister's husband and lack of respect for me because I didn't make his kind of money, so I kept reading and finally gave it 5 stars as a grade--he didn't wimp out but fought it out with her--good ending.

The basic concept isn't new (that in itself isn't a criticism, many of Shakespeare's play are based on older stories or plays); but at the end, this story didn't say anything new. I was waiting for something to happen, and the story went out with a whimper, not a wham.

They felt like real people working through their issues. When she abandoned him in the hotel lobby I wanted him to leave her ass for good, but real people with children can't make snap decisions like that. You did a great job of showing how they worked through their issues.

WHY WOULD YOU THINK HE'D GO THAT WAY WHEN IT WAS SO FOREIGN TO HIM. THE STORY IS TOTAL SHIT AND NO WAY SEXY, SENSUAL OR EROTIC.

this was a piece of shit. I gave one star for the first four chapters, after that it turned to shit ! ! !

It's about FICTION. Stop me if I'm going too fast for you here: a fictional premise which may or may not be rooted in truth to some degree or another (see Carvohoi or TTT, among others who are pretty good at this), but it's a STORY. This was a pretty good examination of the super-saturation as a tool to end unwanted behavior. Look it up in pretty much any psychological text or journal--it's pretty instructive and IT WORKS.

Personally, I myself would have not taken her back after Dallas in the first place, although that's ONLY personal preference. Let's do remember these are fictional characters, okay? The whole point of writing in this particular subsection IS to provoke thought and irritate the holy Hell out of people in order to make a point. Lighten up, Francis. (Stripes? Anybody? Sigh. No accounting for venom and people who will not just let it go.)

Pretty good psychological examination of a situation, in my estimation. I gave it a 5 for that alone. Y'all should read the other works this author put out. Assuming you can pull yourself off your high horse passing judgement on the peasants long enough to open your mind instead of simply rearranging your prejudices. Just saying.

It's not as if he just went out and started singing... he did the frog and hot water instead...

Little bit at a time as he tried to keep his marriage going against her obvious lack of control... there was no doubt that he loved her and the children... if anything seemed questionable it would be her changing... Though since he admitted from the onset that he believed she never set out to hurt him or cheat on him but rather was just out of control I'm guessing we should accept that she could change when she sees how she seemed to be losing him to everyone else...

That people who bitch about the stories like to remain anonymous. They are the real crap heads who find anything more involved than the old Dick and Jane story books too difficult to read, much less understand.

Fem-male story,the reason we have wars, the fem-males send the men out to die so they can fuck the wives, and wives encourage the men to die so they can fuck the fem-males. Why fem-male because forgiveness(with no redemption/regret) is a weakness of the soul, characters like this guy need to eliminated from the gene pool, they are an inferior breed of male,he showed rage but no strength of character to walk away, if you follow the new forgiveness christian point of view(fem-males do) ie dont hate,it takes strength to forgive, hate the sin but not the sinner....your a fool..this guy was a fool....God dont forgive because you ask,real regret(women never say sorry and mean it any more they are empowered) ,remorse(show me one example of remorse in this story she still flirted with anything with a dick),redemption(women/men assume I'm sorry means they are..show it prove it).

The male in this story let her do all this time and time again..hence a fem-male to afraid to leave to say no this is wrong i deserve better here are my standards live up to them or get out slut.If you sacrifice any of your character for a spouse you lessen your self and deserve no redemption/love, the religion the preaches forgiveness at any price is the same one fucking you little boy up the ass hiding it and then saying forgive me.

is accurate assessment

didn't like this tale.

2*s

First this is just fiction. That said at the end we hear about this new person Margaret who sounds like the same one from stangstar06's story no way back about the meddling friend who caused the divorce. Also with his last comment I am greatly surprised that he didn't just leave after Dallas instead of waiting for her to kick him out. Also either after Dallas or at the end I would have expected a ton of counseling especially since he was worried about himself. But Margaret starting to call her lawyer? On what grounds? If anything he had the moral high ground here right till he became an active participants in all the shenanigans with the group. Anyway since he is worried he should seek counseling from a professional and bring his wife into it. Maybe one more chapter not as long on how they got it together again and where the hell Margaret showed up from.

In the end he did everything he could to keep them together instead of falling apart. Not a wimp here. Just a case of different strokes and all that and he was ultimately successful to a major degree.

Keep writing I like the majority of your stories. People just have to remember in the end it is just a story.

Just mho here take it or leave it.

Seeker

This is an excellent ride of emotion. A greatly spun yarn.

The only thing left to ask is how Ash ever found out that she had been manipulated by Brad. Don't get me wrong, it was great to see her develop herself and go from looking for the next escalation to wanting her "one and only" back.

Very nicely done!

One year after reading this for the first time, I still think it is great. I love the ending, as it makes clear the fundamental flaw of his plan . . . The potential to get himself addicted to the lifestyle. As the author, I'm glad you were aware if that and worked it into the ending. Five stars.

Perhaps one flaw in the storyline that you overlooked . . .

His plan was to make her experience in the lifestyle so horrible that she would no longer desire it. "Ashley was refusing sex, albeit of a particular kind, because she understood the consequences were too severe for her. The thrill in it was gone. It might be a good sign. He hoped it was. He prayed it was." In the end, she claims that his plan worked. Unfortunately, the facts of the story undermine the whole premise of the storyline. Her divorce from her second husband, the one who got her into the lifestyle, occurred because she caught him having sex with another swinger outside of the proper venue. Why didn't that traumatic event sour her on the lifestyle? Clearly it did, as she left it, met her hubby, and then vowed to never have anything to do with the lifestyle again. That distaste, lasted all of two years? Given the failure of that experience to have a lasting effect, I'm not sure how he could devise a plan to try and do the same kind of thing (cultivating a bad association with the lifestyle) and think it would actually work. The idea was crazy to begin with, even crazier given this knowledge.

The way your cucks often don't remain emasculated ones,although that beginning where she rushed off,I thought that would be divorce time. He really was being a whiny sissy I didn't think he would recover.

But at least he took control and seemed to get back to a happy more normal marriage..

having been an active player in the past, this story really hit me hard .

i've seen the "lifestyle" destroy relationships , marriages / friendships / work associations .

i've also seen it save realtionships & marriages , and seen people make life long platonic friendships.

iv'e known people who met on the scene , left it & lived happily ever after.

i guess what i am trying to say is diferent people react , handle & change in a whole variety of ways after being exposed / involved in the scene .

the adventure , the lust for excitement , the joy, the addiction , the needing more , the transcendant emotions , the power , the helplessness ,

the anguish & pain that the "lifestyle" can sometimes lead to ,

& the total emotional gut wrenching collapse when the epiphany strikes .

while this story is a work of fiction , much of its contents resonates deeply with me.

in my opinion its extremly well written & covers a side of this topic many vanilla / outsiders will struggle to comprehend.

and many even on the scene past & present will deny any relevance to their own activities & those that they have met . Denial is another very common emotion you are sure to encounter when you are actively playing & actually keep your Eyes & Mind open . which again i can personaly attest to.

i wish i could write a 1/10 as well as you do.

ty for writing it , ty for sharing it with us.

xxxhugsxxx

Is what I call a group of devients that pretend to be married and love their spouses, when they only love themselves. The nicest of them are sex addicts; the worst are trying to corrupt all they can. Thankfully, I find them revolting. This did not read like a LH_07 story. 1 star!

"I absolutely enjoyed a lot of it," ..he shamed her, guilted her, insulted her, and manipulated her out of a lifestyle he absolutely enjoyed due to his own jealousies and insecurities of measuring up to other men.