All Comments on 'Conversation Overheard Ch.02'

I enjoyed the story and the writing but to believe that the woman could just overlook what Tom did and was trying to do stains credibility. As it was written in the first chapter, Tom was doing much more than just trying to cover his business expenses. He was looting her life savings. He was also screwing Sara. It doesn't seem reasonable that these 2 things could be overlooked. Even if you believe the business aspect of the money transfers, that doesn't explain the affair with Sara which had been ongoing, according to the emails. A person would have to be pretty desperate to get back together with someone who was capable of such treachery. She also doesn't trust him even after remarrying if she feels that she has to keep a close tab on her finances to make sure that he isn't stealing from her.

I didn't bother to read more than the first two paragraphs in this ... whatever it is. The number of grammatical and punctuation errors in those first two paragraphs told me there wouldn't be any point in reading further. I just scrolled to the end of the "story" and gave it the lowest possible scores.

sometimes we do things that would make other people shake their heads. i do hope that your decision to try again w/ Tom works out.

fantasywise, the story sucks. but in reality, its not that uncommon. unattractive people do need to be loved too.

I just hope she has not made a mistake by taking Tom back,but then it's only a story(or is it?)

Anyone who would "scroll down" and post a poor vote without reading the story strikes me as someone who would vote for a President based on hair style.

Thus demonstrating they are lacking completely in intelligence. But whatever, I said I am not a writer and I make no pretense to be one.

Those looking for the prose of a Shakespeare should perhaps read that instead?

Sally

I appreciate aspects of this story - the ambiguity, the imperfections physical and mental, yet the hope that doesn't die. Sally, you could put all of this stuff together with a good editor and be the next Erica Jong (but actually much better).

to vote at all on a story without even reading it is childish. if he's so distainful of amatuer writers posting here maybe he might try somewhere else for writings that meets his intellectual standards. he should try the public library,childrens section.

don

seems. I found it and all her warts and flaws endearing so with her open heartedness - it was entertaining - interesting.<P>

So open minded one please proceed with another at your leisure as I like your style.<P>

Thanks Authoress<P>

With Regard

I enjoyed Sally's story. She's not perfect, she's human. She's not goody-two-shoes, she's a person with good points and bad points. Best of all, she knows herself, and she knows what she wants. She's an admirable individual, someone with integrity and honesty. It makes her easy to like.

<P>

Her story plays out without fanfare but it's a pleasing read as Sally finds happiness again with Tom. She's no foolish schoolgirl because she's learned from her experiences. She takes the old homily "Once bitten, twice way." to heart in her new marriage. It's a pleasing resolution to the conflict in the story.

<P>

Thank you for your effort.

Your writing in this chapter is as flowing and captivating as in the first chapter. Your ability to relate fragments of introspection is way above what is usually seen here. Even the Diary style with its loose entries does not get in the way; it gives a similar sense to home made documentary. Still, as you hinted people should not be confusing your story with an accurate biography. For sure this is a drama which might be based on your life, but which takes much deserved artistic liberties to divert at will to make a stronger point or to act out a fantasy.<P>

Two comments: First, regardless of the wisdom of getting back together with Tom some facts don’t match. In the first chapter you mentioned a dark scheme to trap you by luring you into cheating on your husband (with Paul and or others). This is much darker than Tom’s cheating alone. And how does it square with the innocent version of the troubled businessman who has made few wrong decisions? <P>

The second comment: it would still benefit your writing to go over it again and trim it a bit, just remove some repetitions or side comments which do not add to the main line of the story; not because you are a bad writer, but because you are very good and could improve much more even without an editor.

Thanks for a really nice, sweet sexy story. It had the sense of being heart felt and so sexy too. I think many men and women will relate to this writers approach which touches on our needs so well. Thanks again.

Definitely needs more authors like yourself. You have a real talent and the stories you write are thoughtful and erotic.

You stuck to who you are and what you want. Personally I think TOM should have treated you like a princess. You deserved better. But anyway well written story.

I have to admit that IMHO you should have kept the cat in the bag a bit longer. But it was very real and I certainly can see people behaving that way. The story except for the antecipation of the return to Tom was well crafted. Thanks

STUPID,STUPID,STUPID. If a woman accepts that kind of crap from a man and remarries him, that type of behavior is exactly what she can expect to repeat itself. If a woman doesn't have any respect for herself then certainly the man won't either. She is a loser just repeating her loser actions with a man she all ready knows is an ass. Where does it say that a woman is allowed to act stupid and use "love" as an acceptable excuse. I read Man Withot Arms and gave you my highest rating and now I read this and feel like it was written by an emotionally immature 16 girl.

Jerry

Each and every one of else needs someone to love and be loved by no matter the faults we all have. You were very practical and honest with your feelings all along. Tom had changed and was worthy at the end of your story. This story is more real than 90% of the stories written in loving wives... Finding lasting love is hard for almost anyone, and putting up with your loved one's warts is all part of making a marriage work... Its so nice to read something that fits real life. Great story

There would have been many more comments. If the roles had been switched and the wife cheated on and stole from the husband, there would have been outrage. Readers would have demanded a lynching. When he took her back, he would have been labeled a wimp. I wonder what would have been said in this case, however. There seems to be a double standard.

Is it autobiographical? It feels real enough.

Despite what a lot of people who comment here think, life is NOT black and white. Life is so mixed, nobody can tell anybody what is right or wrong in life.

Me? I would have let Tom go, if I were you Sally... but that's me. I can see that for you, it was the right thing to do, and it felt right. It completed your life.

It is so hard to really know people, we all have a part of ourselves that we do not reveal to others. I am sure not even Tom knows all of your mixed feelings about what happened before.

For those of us who do not accept all of the shades of gray... well, that is fine too, for them...but it is not fine to project that false morality on others. It is, well, dysfunctional and wrong.

If this is an autobiography, then I like you alot.

Thanks for your effort in writing these pieces.

You have a smooth delivery of your stories I like that. Thanks for sharing.

I don't get it. I just don't get it. Somebody help me.

a got-ya again....and dont be a glutton for pain, TK U MLJ LV NV

No one is that stupid.not to mention the setup attempt and cheating

this felt so real. thank you.

I've gone back and I'm reading your stories in chronological order. It sounds clichéd, it sounds trite, but I can see you growing as a writer. I began with "The Man with No Arms" and next read "Choices", and I loved your nearly minimalist style. Now I'm getting a chance to see how you arrived there. Actually, terms like spare or minimalist don't sound quite right. I guess you've said it best in relating the advice from your friend Lee- just tell the story. It's unadorned, open and honest. That's very appealing, as are your descriptions of yourself. You've shown candor about seeing yourself as unremarkable, even dumpy, but many women are hypercritical of the way they look. Women often dress for other women or for themselves, comparing what they see in the mirror to a standard of physical perfection that's unrealistic and not relevant to what men see when they take in the same image. Succinctly, you sound delectable. Your critical assessment of yourself is charming and disarming, but it's done without artifice or guile. That's attractive and quite arousing. You're again just telling the story, offering a frank and forthright account of what you see, feel and what you have done.

I'm really enjoying your posts here. Thanks for writing them.

...than chapter 1. Did not know how to rate that one. But this one is 5 stars. But maybe it would not have worked without the background of chapter 1.

This is not a story or a writer to wow you, like some unrealistic Literotica story with an 11 on a 10 scale former cheerleader getting together with a stud quarterback who looks a famous movie star. Some of those wild fantasies can be, well, wild fantasies. But Conversion Overhead is more like some real woman in real-life America letting us in on what she was thinking while she is going through some ups and downs in life. This story is comfortable -- like what I assume it is for a woman who gets home and puts on comfortable house shoes, although she's glad she wore the 4 inch high heels to the party.

The writing is such that I did not notice it as my mind was on the story. -- and that's good.

Paul in Oklahoma

I read chapter one a while back and enjoyed it. This was a story about a real woman, not a plastic caricature. Her thoughts, actions, and reactions are those of a normal human being. It was a surprise that she took Tom back. After his double betrayal, it didn't seem possible. But I guess she really did love him. The prenup is a good idea for her safety.

Real people in real situations without overboard reactions, sexuality, or unrealistic situations...but still erotic from a woman's point of view. Thanks, Doc!

Great two story set. Tom seems to.have learned a lesson. Hope so.

You are a dick.

This story is a good story

5*****

Too drastic change

Conflicted with money trail first story

Good story