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All Comments on 'Finally'

by NoahBody

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  • 2 Comments
smerniesgirlsmerniesgirlover 14 years ago
Well written, but...

You went from "I" and "you" to "me" and "she"...

Otherwise excellent story... I plan on acting this one out later with my hubby. ;)

ArchieWalthamArchieWalthamover 8 years ago
A bit of editing

Why did you go from referring to the woman as "you" to "she" midway through the story?

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