All Comments on 'MindOps Ch. 04'

Very nice story. Waiting for the next chapter.

When did BURKE become BARNS????

loved it hope there's more to come.

I am put off by the use of wrong words, ones that sounds right but aren't. You've used wether, a castrated sheep, when you meant whether, byte, a computing term, when you meant bite, witch, a sorceress, when you meant which, and ridged when you meant rigid. There may have been others, but those caught my eye. Please take a moment as you write to determine the correct word and its spelling.

If the story were simply a wank piece, maybe it wouldn't matter, but in a good, plotted story as this story is, these miscues are jarring.

Now Jimmy needs to go back Home and meet up with Dad & Mom and all of the Others who Joked about him and see where they have gone or Not Gone.

Will you write more? If you do write more, what happens next? Please write more, it can't end like that.

I would have liked a chapter between 2 and 3. One where he finishes school and fixe his drunken father. I alo think it would be nice to hear about some of his fun finishing school.

Funny, with a username Military... you spell the rank Sergeant (Sgt) wrong. Did your spell check did not tell you anything about Sargent being wrong?

Anyway, the story could have potential if you would try connecting the dots.

is sirah going with him or what? good story though

It has been over two years and there is still not an ending? W T F O ! !

This author's an idiot......

Finish your story you fool!!!!

When, if ever, do you intend on finishing this story? I am reading this on 10/7/2015. Hopefully you are alive and healthy. Please let us know what happened to your protagonists.

YOMEYO

definitely need more of this story a very good read

Great story with 4 good chapters, but overall the series is incomplete. It deserves several more chapters. Also his time in high school was skipped. It would have been good to include more of that.