by Scandman
sometimes you say things like, "her testicles" and mix genders up so that it's weird to read, but dismissing that and correcting mentally makes it a good story.
I agree it needs some editing as some actions get confusing. Also I found the plot somehow weird and sometimes unreal, but let's give you a chance with chapter 2 so to see how do you handle the evolution of the story.
This really needs some editing between her and his. Unless she has testicles. It was very distracting