by shaqrach2
My main issue with the story is that the main character with basically unlimited power to control anyone is just not that picky about his targets. He ravishes the first women he comes across. I know that if it were me with these powers, I'd want to seek out the most astonishingly beautiful women I could find. Also, I'd be more careful about avoiding the wrong kind of attention. Lastly, the main character's morals are VERY inconsistent. One one hand he steals, lies, and cuckolds without remorse. On the other, he randomly decides to financially support Faye. It all just seems so random.
Well said. I find that ones weight does not determine their attractiveness alone, at least not in my books. As long as there is a decent personality underneath. Personally, I find a person with a shitty attitude, no matter what they look like, to be quite unattractive.
There is no rule on what looks ( or is) good.
240 pounds can be a disaster or a gift from the gods.
Never ever put a formula on attraction.
5'10" 110 lbs? She would look like a skeleton, all skin and bones, no ass or tits. Also, unless she is 6'6", 240 lbs is morbidly obese, not chubby. I get that this is fantasy, but for the love of all that is unholy, at least make it something we can reasonably picture in our demented minds.
Rule 4 -- The best way to keep a secret? Keep it to yourself. Second best? Tell one other person - if you must. There is no third best.
If you want to keep a secret tell nobody, unless you make him a much compliant slave.
the only way his friend will keep the secret is if he gets something out of it otherwise he has no reason to, and just being his friend wont be enough to keep it from slipping out