The Widower Chronicles Ch. 03

"How is Lucy? I know you guys aren't dating anymore." Cindy looked at me for a second. "Are you?"

"No, just business partners. She's dating a guy more her age now that she seems to like a lot."

"I'm sorry day. That must suck."

"No, not really. I'm happy for her."

Cindy's eyes narrowed. "So if you weren't with Lucy, who were you with last night?" Billy and Tina both looked at her and then at me.

"None of your business."

"Was it Robin?"

"None of your business is the answer I'm sticking with."

"Oh, I know. I saw you talking to her last night at the game. But I can't remember her name. You know her Cindy. Short, dark hair. She's got twin daughters and went to school with dad."

"Mrs. Markum? Dad, isn't she married?"

"Same answer as before. New subject. Since the boys are going to the lake, what do you want to do?"

Cindy looked at Billy, then at Tina. "I believe the majority wants to go back to old business. Spill it pops."

"The mall? Up to the lake with the boys? Or just lie around the house and watch some of the games."

Cindy was about to say something but made the decision to hold her tongue. "The mall sounds good to me. What about you Tina?"

"I could use some new clothes."

"The mall it is, but don't think we're not going to discuss this later dad." Cindy and Tina got up from the table and headed upstairs to get dressed. As Tina passed, she gave me a big hug and said "I'm happy for you Mr. Starling." She kissed my cheek and followed Cindy upstairs.

When I looked up, Billy was staring at me oddly, but didn't say anything.

"What's on your mind Billy?"

"Nothing."

"Spill it boy. I can see the smoke coming from your ears."

He squirmed for a long time before speaking again. "Do you miss mom?" I could see tears forming in his eyes as he waited for my answer.

"More than you can possibly imagine buddy."

"Me too dad. I think about her all the time."

"I do also. Even if I don't seem to at times, I miss her very much."

"Is everything OK with you?"

"Yeah. I just wasn't sure if it was normal to keep missing her like that. Sometimes I get really sad and just don't want to be bothered. How do you cope?"

"I just do. There are some days I don't even want to get out of bed. But I know I have to."

He just nodded his head and went back to his cereal. He took a couple more bites and asked "Why did you and Lucy stop dating?"

"Because she wants a family of her own and I wasn't interested in having one with her. You guys are my family and I don't think we need anyone else."

"What about just getting married again? Do you think you ever will?"

"I don't Bud. I really liked Lucy and I think if things were different, I could have married her, but they weren't. Maybe if I meet someone else that makes me feel like your mom does, I'll get married again."

He took a deep breath and finished his bowl. "I know someone that wants to meet you."

"Excuse me?"

"I said that I know someone that wants to meet you. She works at the school. She's very nice and very pretty. Most of the guys have a crush on her. Do you want to meet her?"

"I don't think so. Dating someone from the school you go to doesn't really sit very well with me. It could become awkward."

"She's not a teacher or anything. She just works there."

"Not right now Billy. Maybe another time."

He looked down at his empty bowl and reached for the box to refill it. "OK dad. But let me know and I can get her a message." I just shook my head as he finished off the box of cereal. "Oh, by the way, this is the last box."

"Dude, seriously? I just bought you five boxes last weekend."

"Dad, that was six days ago." Now I understood why my mom always complained about me.

"I'll get some more later. Or should I just call the company and have them deliver direct?"

"Ha ha dad, you're a riot."

I shook my head in amazement as Billy shoveled the cereal into his mouth. I decided to go sit outside with the newspaper rather then watch him swallow yet another bowl of cereal. When Tommy came down, he told me of the plans and I gave them permission to use the house. They got their usual lecture about making sure everything was clean when they were done and not to stay too late.

The girls finally came down and we headed to the mall. What seemed to be an eternity for me was in reality only two hours. But the girls had done some major damage already. It was just past one when I requested we take a break.

Cindy said, "OK, I just want to check out one more store. We'll catch up to you in the food court."

"Do you want me to take all this to the truck now?"

"That would be awesome dad. We'll meet you in a few minutes."

"I'll stay with your dad, Cindy. Is that OK?"

Cindy's smile disappeared and reappeared quickly. "Sure you don't want to come? I saw some really nice shoes for you."

"I'm set for shoes. Besides, I think you're dad may need an extra hand with all of this stuff."

"You're loss. I'll catch up in a few." And she was gone.

"You don't need to help me Tina. I can handle this much alone."

She looked at all the bags and said "I know. I just wanted to talk to you alone."

My eyes got big as I wondered what she wanted to talk to me about. We started walking to the exit and she remained quiet. Outside we found the truck and loaded all the bags. "OK, so what did you want to talk to me about?"

She looked me directly in the eyes and asked "Do you think I'm pretty?"

She had caught me completely off-guard with her question. "I think you're gorgeous Tina. Why do you ask?"

"If you were my age, would you want to be with me?"

"Yes. Any guy would want to be with you? What's this all about?" I was getting a little freaked out by her questions.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why would you want to be with me?"

I shook my head slightly and looked into her eyes. I got the feeling I was heading down a bad path, but I took a chance. She had real sincerity in her eyes. "I don't think we have enough time right now for this discussion, but I'll give it a shot." Hey eyes didn't blink at all now as we stood next to my car. "The easy answer is that you are the most gorgeous woman I know next to April and Lucy. But like I said, that's the easy answer and one I'm sure you already knew."

"You think I'm as beautiful as Lucy?"

"Uh, yeah. Easily." Her face glowed when that sunk in. "But there's more to my answer. I know you're extremely smart. Probably as smart as Cindy. All you need to do is put some more effort into it. Next, you have a great personality. You're sweet and friendly and easy to be around."

"You like being around me? I never knew that."

"Why do you think I let you move in? Not because I felt sorry for you."

"I kind of did think that."

"Maybe partly. But also because you fit into my family. You're polite and have good manners. If I didn't like you, you wouldn't be there right now. So maybe you can explain why you're asking me these questions?"

She finally looked away from me as she pondered her answer. "Because Cindy is always saying nice things to me, trying to get me to meet guys and stuff, but I'm so afraid they won't like me. I try, but I just can't get myself to believe what she says."

"Look, Cindy is your best friend and she thinks of you like her sister. She's trying to look out for you and is concerned. She wants you to enjoy yourself. Do what you want, but trust me. You're young, beautiful and smart. Have some fun before the real world steps in. Don't be stupid, but have fun."

"OK, thanks Mr. Starling." And she gave me a huge hug and kiss that actually embarrassed me.

"Can I ask you something personal?" I asked as we walked back into the mall.

"Anything."

"Do you like guys?"

Her face turned bright red before she answered. "Yes. I just don't know how to act around them."

I laughed and she blushed even redder, if that was possible. "I'll let you in on a little secret. Most guys are probably afraid of you too."

"Why?"

"Because you're gorgeous. Most guys are intimidated by gorgeous woman."

"You're not."

I blinked at her and asked "What do you mean by that?"

"Well, you always seem so easy around woman. Even when April was alive you just seemed to have a way to make woman swoon around you. You do it all the time. I saw how Lucy looked at you when you were together."

"Maybe that's true, but woman still scare the daylights out of me."

"Do I scare you?" she asked.

"You're different. I've known you since you were five."

"Maybe you're right. But boys still scare me."

I smiled at her and it seemed as if a load was off her shoulders as she smiled back at me. When we walked into the food court, Cindy was already waiting for us, amazingly without any bags. "Where have you guys been?"

"Talking," I said. Cindy squinted at me but let it pass. "Do you guys want to eat here or go somewhere else?"

They both looked around and simultaneously said "Somewhere else." They both giggled at that and we headed out to the car. "Besides, I'm all shopped out. How about we eat and head home?"

"Sounds good to me," I said.

We enjoyed a nice lunch where the girls caught me up on all their college activities. Tina excused herself to use the bathroom and as soon as she was out of earshot Cindy turned to me and ask "What did you guys talk about?"

"You'll have to ask her."

"Dad, don't be mad at me for saying this, but I think she has a crush on you."

"I guess that answers you question about being gay, doesn't it?"

If I just had my camera right at that moment I would have loved to have had a picture of Cindy's face. "What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that even if she does have a crush on me, it's none of your business. I love her like a daughter and nothing more."

Cindy looked suspicious and said "And that's all you're going to say?"

"Cindy, you're being childish. And blind." I looked towards the bathrooms to see if Tina was coming back yet. "I'm not dumb enough to have an affair with Tina. Even if that is what she wants, which I'm pretty sure she doesn't." I saw Tina exit the bathroom. "We'll talk more about this later, but just think about what I said."

Cindy sat back as Tina slid in next to her. "Hey Mr. Starling. Isn't that the woman you were talking to last night at the game?"

I looked to where she was pointing and saw Sarah in a booth with her kids. "Yes. That's Sarah Markum. We went to high school together."

"That's who you slept with? Mrs. Markum? How could you? She's married."

"Separated, if you must know, and getting divorced."

"Dad, seriously. What are you thinking?"

"That she is an old friend, attractive and very nice. Besides, I never said I slept with her."

Cindy was about to say something when Sarah suddenly appeared at the table with her kids. "Hey Frank. I didn't expect to see you here." She looked very cute with her hair pulled back under a baseball cap, t-shirt and jeans. But she had a silly smile as she said hi to Cindy and Tina.

"Hey Sarah. Yeah, just hanging out with the girls."

"Hi, Ms. Markum. It's nice to see you again."

"Same to you Cindy. I can't believe how big you've gotten. You're in college now?"

"Yes. Freshman year."

We made some idle chit chat before Sarah hustled away with the kids, off to the mall we had just left.

"She is cute. I'll give you that."

"Thanks."

The rest of the afternoon went by quietly. We had a simple dinner and I retired to my game room. As I watched some of the games, Cindy came in and sat beside me.

"I'm sorry if I got crazy about Tina earlier. I know you wouldn't do anything like that. But she talks about you a lot at school and it worries me that she doesn't know the line."

"Next time you go out, don't push her towards any guys. Let her make the move."

"Are you sure she likes guys?"

"Yes. My gut feeling is that her mom did or said some things that really hurt her. Probably bringing home so many losers, but I don't know for sure. Just be cool with her, OK?"

"OK dad." She actually snuggled against me like she used to when she was little. We were like that when Tina joined us, dressed to go out.

"Hey Cindy, any chance you want to go to a party?"

"I thought you didn't want to go?"

"I changed my mind. I heard Seth is going to be there?"

Cindy jumped up and ran out of the room. "Let me get ready," she shouted over her shoulder.

Tina was dressed to kill. She was wearing a blouse that hung nicely over her tits, mini-skirt and thigh high boots.

"Who's Seth?"

"A guy I liked in high school but was always afraid to talk to."

"Be very careful. You look amazing by the way."

Her smile was devastating. "Thanks Mr. Starling. Do you think Seth will like it?"

"He'd have to be dead not to." She leaned over and gave me a kiss.

"Do you know you're the only guy that I've ever kissed?" She giggled about that and sat back on the couch.

I just shook my head and turned back to the game. Thirty minutes later, Cindy was back and dressed similarly to Tina. "Ready to go?"

"Ready." They both said good night and headed out the door. "We won't be too late Mr. Starling."

"Just have some fun."

I heard the whispering together as they left the house. The rest of the night was quiet till the boys and some of their friends returned. After a quick hello, they went out back. I decided to put together some snacks for them and dropped them off to a chorus of thank yous. Just before I went back inside Billy came over.

"Hey dad. I was thinking about what you said before about mom. Thanks. It made me feel a lot better."

"Good. If you need to talk, my door is always open."

He bear hugged me and ran back to his friends. Just as I turned through the open door, I slammed into a girl that was coming out. She dropped to the ground and landed on her ass with a thump.

"Holy shit, I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there. Are you OK?"

"I'm fine. Just really embarrassed."

I helped her up and realized I had no idea who she was. She seemed to be older then Billy and Tommy's usual friends. "I'm Mr. Starling." I held out my hand and she shook it.

"Oh, I know. I'm Jessica."

"Nice to meet you. Are you one of Tommy's friends?"

"Older sister of one of their friends. Actually, Marie over there." She waved outside until a young girl waved back. "I came over to bring her some stuff. I knocked and nobody answered so I let myself in." She seemed to realize something and added "I'm sorry. I guess that was pretty rude of me. Marie just told me it would be OK."

"It is. I just didn't expect anyone to be inside."

Marie had come over and grabbed the bag from her sister. "Thanks sis" and she was off.

Jessica started to say something, but didn't when Marie just headed off.

"I guess I'll head home then. Sorry about barging in like that."

"No problem Jessica. Sorry for running you over like that."

She smiled and I walked her to the door. She turned and waved good-bye as she went back to her car. Just when I turned around Marie came darting through the back door and ran past me out the front door. "Hey Jessica, wait up." Marie caught up to her and the two of them discussed something for a few minutes. Jessica looked over at me and then turned back to Marie. The spoke for a few more minutes and then Marie pulled her back towards the house.

"Mr. Starling, is it OK if Jessica hangs around for a while? I have to leave in about an hour and she's my ride. I'd hate for her to drive home only to have to come get me again."

"Uh, sure. Come on it."

"Are you sure? I don't really live that far from here."

"No, it's fine, really. Come on in."

"Thanks Mr. Starling," Marie said and ran back out with her friends.

"Look, I can leave. I don't want to be a burden on you."

"Really, it's no problem. Can I get you something to eat or drink?"

"A drink would be fine."

I opened the fridge for her and pointed out several things. The reached for a pop and I showed her into the game room. "I hope you don't mind football. There really isn't much else to watch."

"I love football. That's OK with me."

We sat awkwardly for a while. "So, you're Marie's older sister? I thought I knew her sister?"

"Well, actually, I'm her half-sister. We have the same mom."

"I didn't realize she was married before." Jessica's face turned red and I realized I just made a really bad mistake. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed anything."

"No, it's alright. She had me when she was nineteen and my dad had left us. She met Marie's dad a few years later and had two more girls."

"I guess I really stuck my foot into my mouth that time."

She just laughed and watched the game. "If I tell you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

"Uh sure." I had an odd feeling I wasn't going to like what I heard next.

She suddenly became very shy and wouldn't meet my eyes. Very quietly she said "Billy and Marie invited me over to meet you."

Very calmly I said "What do you mean by that?"

She looked over her shoulder towards the kitchen and out back. "I work at their school in the admin office. I was engaged to be married but we broke it off last year. I've been pretty much a mess since then and haven't done much socially. They've been after me for a while to come meet you, but I kept putting them off. They didn't tell me directly, but I'm pretty sure they set this up."

"How can you be sure?"

"Because if I had known I was coming to your house, I wouldn't have come. But all Marie gave me was an address and directions. She said it was a friend's house. And I'm pretty sure that she didn't need the stuff that I brought with me."

"Ah, so you're the one Billy was talking about at breakfast today." I stared at the TV and sipped my drink. Jessica was also quiet, but was looking at me. I understood why Billy said all the kids at school lusted after her. She was tall with long, black hair, dark colored eyes and a very pretty face. She had an athletic build and seemed to take very good care of herself. Her legs were long and toned. She dressed moderately, but I could make out a nice swell to her chest.

"I'm sorry if I've made you uncomfortable. My family has been very concerned since my engagement broke off."

"No, just thinking. I'm sorry. I'm not being a very good host. What happened?"

"I found out he was cheating on me with someone from work. I was away for a weekend and when I came home, I found them in bed together." She stared down into her lap. It always amazed me hearing about what guys would do. Not that I knew her very well, but she was extremely attractive. I hoped for his sake it was worth it.

"I'm sorry. That must have been rough."

"Very. The worst part is that he didn't even really care. And the little slut was a cow," she said angrily. I looked over at her sharply. "I'm sorry. But she was. She was like five feet tall and two hundred pounds. She was a troll. And now they are married and I'm stuck at home getting set up by my sixteen year old sister." She looked directly at me and added "I'm sorry. That last part was mean and I don't want to offend you."

"Guys do stupid things. But you can't let them get to you. And your sister is just looking out for you."

She laughed. "Except that no thirty year old woman should have to be set up by a sixteen year-old. It's embarrassing." Thirty? She didn't look older the twenty.

"You're thirty? Hell, want a real drink then?"

She looked over at the bar for a minute. "Can I have a Cosmo?"

"One Cosmo coming right up." I went behind the bar and fixed her drink. She sat at the bar and watched as I poured it into her glass. She took one sip and smiled.

"That's fantastic. It's better than the bar."

"Thanks. My wife used to love them, so I learned how to make them for her."

"Your wife? I didn't realize you were married?" She looked ashamed.