All Comments on 'What Happens in Vegas... Ch. 02'

It's not a bad story, but it could be much better if there were some background to the characters, and a little conflict or drama to make the readers care. As it is, I know nothing about the people in this story, even after reading the first chapter. And it seems as though they all just jumped head-first into this unusual situation without any conversation or hesitation.

I encourage you to keep writing. Next time, add a little dialog between the characters, so that we have some sense of their personalities and why they are doing what they are doing.

First, as others have said, there's no character development… no reason to care about these characters.

The sex isn't remotely erotic - you've jus strung together mechanical descriptions, filled with stupid, juvenile cliches like "worship at the altar" and "tonsil hockey."

one thing the author is an idiot and a loser.

These Vegas cheating stories just get more and more boring every time there is a new one posted.