All Comments on 'When Fantasy Becomes Reality Ch. 02'

Pretty much as Lamway said.

The portrayal of a narcissistic wife was thorough and consistent, up until the end when she suddenly has an epiphany. But nothing up to that point set the table for such an event. It simply wasn't believable that she'd suddenly be so different.

Slirpuff is one of my favorites on here, but this wasn't one of his best.

I didn't really like the ending. The wife obviously wanted a new life that didn't include a husband & 2 kids. I felt as if the husband was begging her to be a mom & wife, for heaven sakes she could recap the last chapter of her book but she had to think about her kids ages. I would have divorced the bitch when she chose to go to the charity event instead of keeping her appointment for marriage counseling that right there shows just how little she cares about her family. Shit I would've divorced the bitch when I saw her on national television acting like a complete slut. She doesn't call her family when she's in new York, she ignores her children, she ignores her husband, disrespected him & I'm suppose to believe after all that she was willing to sacrifice her "dreams" I'm sorry I found myself screaming bullshit! A year without making love? My husband bitches & catches major attitudes if we don't have sex every day or two, a year to him might be grounds for divorce... Lol

Look at most the stories here, if the wife thinks the husband has cheated. She fucks 2 or 3 guys and send him the tape. Here the wife is seen kissing another man, it's even donw on national tv, TWICE and in the end slirpuff you make him sell out. It's becoming your pattern. Look at your story, "no one won". He cheated and you fried him. She made his life hell, his mom even turned on him. Then he finds out his daughter isn't his and he starts getting even but in the end you have him sell out and taking the road, which we both know most men would have BTB. 3 Stars

I for once agree with huedogg which is a first.

The wife practically abondoned ehr family for a life she claimed to love. In reality I think she thought she loved her husband. but is she did then she would be wearing her wedding rings and have told everyone who cares that she is a happily married woman. She would not have kissed another man period. The husband was dead on when he said she let the first one kiss her before because he was groping her like a piece of meat.

The second one, Tony, was a clear violation of the written agreement they had concerning 'not doing anything that they would not do openly in front of the other'.

If it were me Randy would have been giving her walking papers and the footage from National TV would be used as conclusive proof of her infidelity.

Geez and to think my GF's have accused me of being clueless. I had one read this story last night after I did and she went off on how stupid Randy was and how much of a wimp Steve was in the end. Randy broke the trust therefore got thrown out. Before Steve dared let her back in she should have been made to show she changed first.

I think this story has some merits but has a very flawed ending.

John

I am a Slirpuff fan. The story was good up until the end. There were too many gaps and areas that needed to be expanded to be able to successfully transition to an ending worthy of the story. This one missed in my opinion.

So, all she had to do was show up for Saturday morning breakfast and say "we". Please. Can you say put your money where your mouth is. I got the impression that you just tired of writing and so went to a quick reconciliation.

I am glad the story ended with them getting back together but not without some admissions on her part. You left out the parts where she finally realized that her dates with her "friend" were not OK, that she really had been ignoring her husband and her children and that her being seen on TV twice on dates were extremely disrespectful to her husband.

In short, the reconciliation is not satisfying in that it is not possible to believe it will last. You left out too much.

I liked the story. I thought it was pretty accurate, particually the things the therapist said about where they should be in two months after the reasons were written. I also agree that Randy did not go through the realization of just what her actions really were. Nor did she see the disrespect she displayed toward her husband. Its my expirence that most men will put up with a lot of shit, but if they feel disrespected, they will stop and really look at whats happening around them. That first sign of disrespect is when they say this is not what I want and leave. I think you should have included Randys learning about respecting her husband and just what her actions were really about, which as you wrote, were about HER. She didnt go through that emotional realization. And it wasnt until walked out that she knew, I mean KNEW, that he was gone. So that leaves the ending. I liked that they did get back together and that he says it wasnt a perfect marriage after that, but it wouldnt have been that easy in real life and I think you know it. So why did you write the ending that way?

I think it all should've come down to the therapist, her parents, or even Steve just asking her if she thought the things she did would pass "the boyfriend test" (.....or 'girlfriend' had the roles been reversed.)

By the way: you had me fooled for a few moments, I wondered if 'little sis' was gonna step in after that little 'ran off crying' scene.

Not bad but the ending was really weak. She just suddenly decides to change? No real insight into her side of the story with the other men or her time in NY? Come on.

too abrupt. She suddenly gets religion and all is better. You developed a character who could not see any other point of view but hers and nothing really happened to shake that but suddenly she has an epiphany and everything is OK. That is just BS. The ending should have been a divorce and maybe then she would begin to understand the concequences. Just not believable. 1 star for a really bad ending.

Overall the story was OK but it lacked in several places. One of these places was in the trips Randy took to New York.

The story would have benefited by the sharing of information involving Randy's visits to New York and her enjoyment of the nightlife. The reader is privy to the knowledge that every time her husband calls she is not in her room or reachable yet we are not given a more accurate portrayal and understanding of Randy's thoughts and motivations as she is actually enjoying her partying and forgetting all about her family. This information would have helped to flesh out the character of Randy allowing the reader to better comprehend and understand Randy's actions and the necessary consequences of them.

The other big part that needs work is the lack of building and development pertaining to the ending. There was no major moment that took place that could be pointed at and said it was a wake up call for Randy. The ending appears as if she just decides oh well I will show up and say i now get it and he will just fall at my feet. Meanwhile the husband is portrayed as if he is brainless and should have been saying "AWWW shuckins you said WE, okee dokee all is forgiven can we bump uglies now, huh huh can we."

The final outcome is not the failure but rather the lack of understanding pertaining to how the final action was reached is where the failure resides.

after 2 pages of bullshit with her being an selfish bitch, he just says ok cool come on back home!? I usually like your stories but this was way too abrupt an end!

I did not like this story ending, pissed me off. That she would some how come to her senses, no way, (in so short of time) no possible way at all. She is selfish to the core, the only way for her to see the light was to have it shut off, by that a divorce with limited contact with the children. Maybe only then (not likely) having lost her family would she see the light (even after being kicked out of the house she kept on) and try to rekindle what she lost. As for the husband, gave too many chances, and maybe you could have added some other women in the story (for him to compare and contrast to the bitch) and liven things up for a better future without the bitch.

Boring

I would have been gone from the marriage quite a while before. Let that selfish bitch have her writing and her NY friends. Plus, she lied to her husband at every opportunity and I would have made her take the polygraph test she offered to take. I do not believe her. I know it is a fucking story but the author let her off way too easy after what she put her husband and children through. Not my favorite story but I gave a good rating like I always do, Good or No rating, that's how I do it.

Sorry, just did not work. The dating, especially the last time was over the top. You wrote her as too egocentric and selfish to believe your ending.

You stretch all limits of believablility with the contrived ending. Do you really think readers are so stupid that she can go from being a self-centered career bitch to loving wife in one-half page? You can do, and have done, better than this...

(WE) what exactly dose that imply. Is a two letter word going to make the last two years go away. This hillbilly is undecided.

Once again you wrote a good beginning and then turned it to complete CRAP ! ! ! !

What a piece of shit story about the most gullible cuck who ever lived.

'nuff said.

Yes, she was a wife any man would want but as she progressed with her career she became a different person.

Being devious, demeaning, mysterious about her activities and treating him like a bother for wanting to know...give us a break. At first she was probably caught up in the excitement but as she continued to associate with her colleagues - she gave NO consideration to her husband and children, only - what she wanted.

Did she make out with the stud at the nightclub - you bet, if only smooching and petting but she did. Going to New York and dating the older man - give us a break...at the very least - she made out with him by way of thanking him for his friendship, her kind of thinking. Did she have intercourse with anyone - I think so, just for business sake and boredom, most likely not love but accommodating to her new environment and after all - takes the edge off.

Slirpuff, you are VERY good at these stories but this one insulted all of us!!! Would he (or I) want to go on without this woman, knowing the early years - hell NO but, she made her bed (pun intended) and he would really need to move on!

Yeah, she's never in her room, no matter what hour, and plays grab ass and kissy face on national TV, but she hasn't fucked him. Pl-ease!

Then there is the little matter that she straight out LIED to him about spending a quiet night in her room. So, trust is gone. COMPLETELY gone.

You take the bitch back, cucky, because I would be done with her in a NEW YORK MINUTE! ))

Many of the commentators lambasting Randy are too stupid to see how Slirpuff has set them up to be displayed in comments with their own drivel for the farcical fools they are. Dumb, dumber, dumbest!

Okay class settled down, swallow your spit-wads and get your fingers out of your noses. First clue, the name Randy for the female protagonist who has become unenthusiastic about sex. Okay you dullards Wiktionary 'randy' and read the definition. Yeah.....

Slirpuff smugly reverses the husband-wife roles and you dullards fell into his flypaper. If it had been Mister Randy and Missuses Stevie, the lot of you would have been extolling the masculine superiority of Mr. Randy's hard work and fame. And criticizing Mrs. Stevie's spousal demands for emotional support and having her husband provide more time and bonding with their children and assistance with housekeeping chores.

How dare the spouse and children interrupt the glorious wonderfulness of Mr. Success with their patently unreasonable expectations that he has any duty to wife and children. And of course if there was a divorce, how dare the wife and children expect anything but minimal if any financial support or parenting from that Most Manly of All Men.

Some of the misogynists posting here are truly off the bizarre end of reality. I figure about half of them are homos who hate all women generically and the other half...well, it's pretty clear why no woman would want anything to do with them anyway. I guess it gives them a hobby - beating their little wienies while shouting cucky.

But the ending was too abrupt and too weak.

seem to be ofended by other peoples opinions. If you do not want others opinions, and want to call them dumb, why is there a posting place for our thoughts and opinions?????? There seems to be a condition of hipocracy in this place. I personally enjoy the work and reading of many of these authors stories,,,, hell I even enjoy reading the comments posted here,,, including the irate ones. Saratu

This story is another one where the husband is taken advantage of pretty often and then forgives her. I don't know how he lasted so long with her, especially after the first NY trip, but he should have dumped her a lot sooner. She was doing something in NY. She was never in her room at night when he called, she was on a date with others and caught not once but twice on TV. But, "Oh, they were just business friends". I would never buy that. She was having a grand old time in the Big City, with very little regard for her husband or her family. He is going to regret taking her back. She cannot be trusted. But this time, he will deserve everything she does to him. Reading Slirpuff's stories, I know he likes to have a weak husband figure who forgives everything to stay together and have a happy ending. This husband should have left her to her fame, fortune and "business friends" and ran-not walked-away from her. Notice when he takes her back, she still wants her new life and the old one also. Does this sound familiar?

its time to get a reality checker, TK U MLJ LV NV

finished with slurp-puff bs cuck wimp tales.

1*

Ok, Wifey MIGHT not have physically cheated, but the emotional cheating with Asshole was there, regardless. The disrespect, not just to her husband, but to her children as well, would have been the deal breaker more than anything else. Her stubbornness turned into stupidity when she saw that she was losing her husband and family, yet STILL ditched counseling to go on a "date" with Asshole. She had plenty of wakeup calls, but chose to ignore all of them until the very end.

I would have to describe her as self-centered, vain, and completely out of touch with reality. Blinded by bling and dollar signs to the point where her family was little more than an afterthought. I viewed the ending as a RAAC, but unless she can stay the course this time, I don't have much hope for this marriage surviving.

Like all of your tales, Slirp, this one makes people think. You definitely take on hard topics, not just straight up cheating/consequence tales.

4 Stars. The topics and issues you deal with in these tales are original and closer to real life than most people want to admit.

The wife coming back was not the bad ending, rather it's that she had such an abrupt change of heart and attitude. This can happen but it's rare. The tone of this well written story was one of wonderful realism consistently maintained only to end with, "She realized her mistake and they lived (mostly) happily ever after." May I suggest a rewrite of the ending, even after all this time? It would, of course have to be a much longer ending. Take this as challenge from a fan.

I can sort of understand her actions. Most of the readers here wouldn't be complaining if it was a man working very long hours. Lying and hiding her "dates" was a serious offense, but come on -- we've all seen his type in Hollywood before. She should have been savvy enough to call him out about his "joke" that they'd go on a cruise together, but she probably didn't want to cause any embarrassment for him or for her while trying to network. Basically, she was between a rock and a hard place.

Yes, she put herself there. I acknowledge it and fully agree with those who condemn her behavior. But I think it's important to understand before condemning her.

The ending; however, is too abrupt. We never see any evidence that they (meaning SHE) will do what's needed to mend the bridges. This is a common failing in Slirpuff reconciliation stories -- they always seem to end at the moment where reconciliation is decided, rather than when reconciliation is achieved. The result is that I walk away thinking "lessons haven't been learned, this relationship won't last."

Yes if it was a man working long hours there would be few that had complaints.

Usually when the husband is working those long hours it is to support the family in a manner that the wife approves of.

What is different here is that her income is not needed, and that the primary reason she is doing this is ego driven.

Tw0Cr0ws (login is broken)

loved the story. one minor point. seems like the ending was rushed

Nothing resolved really...

Why is that of all the good writers on this site, you Steve, have the most trouble in writing an ending fitting to the rest of the tale.

When you go out for a 3 course meal at an expensive restaurant isn't the dessert the final G O O D touch, same with writing, the best authors know how to finish properly, engaging the reader right to the end, not your forte unfortunately. This was very disappointing. 2 **

Although the "subject" of this post can be read to mean the characters (both Her and him), what I mean is the story itself. Like seemingly everyone else (at least everyone else that will give some type of constructive feedback as opposed to leaving it at a long winded "it sucked"...which it didn't), I felt that the ending was not only rushed but also that it didn't fit the rest of the story. Perhaps the end would have fit better if there had been more told of how she came to her decision...or maybe it would have fit better if she'd spent some more time detailing her acknowledgement of the differences between how she was/is seeing everything happening and how it really was.

The writing, I felt, was good. I'm not a grammar nazi and if you've read any of my comments (I'm still working up to writing a submission, so those that would call me out on that, sorry, I've beaten you to the punch) know that I have little use for most punctuation, but I can tell when there's more there. In this case there most certainly is. As someone with a creative side and spends a little time writing this is something I wouldn't wish on any writer, but this one is ripe for FTDS. Sorry, SP.

For a whore of a wife like Randy, it must be a wimp of a husband like Steve!!! They deserve each others...

how is anal a tag? And oral? She never did it with her husband, so WTF

So she just showed up, changed completely and still published 4 books in a year? Even I know 2 plus 2 doesn't equal 5. There is no way she just came home, became susie homemaker, his slut in the bedroom, took care of the kids and wrote and published 4 books. There simply aren't enough hours in the day and the fame and fortune were just too important to her. I'm sorry but your ending was so implausible that it ruined the whole story. UGH!

She shows up early on a Saturday to make up for treating him like shit. She is waiting for him and then demands HE make them breakfast - fuck her and horse she came in on. She has not changed and he was fooled again Maybe the next time she will take the cruise, think of all the networking she can do with the young studs and old rich guys. The fact is authors do make their own hours and try to keep to a schedule sort of like a real job, so her excuses like her attitude were just self ranting's on her part

Their new baby was born. They both loved him immensely. He looked a lot like Randy.

I don't accuse her of adultery but "checking out" of the marriage. Continuing that path will almost assuredly lead to adultery if it hasn't already happened

but it took so long to get there. I understand how all of it had to be drawn out to describe how one can be taken over by notoriety. it was well done, and loved the commitment that was upheld throughout the story. doesn't always happen that way, but nice to see that it did here. well written.

the ties that bind a family, who is right, what is right. TK U MLJ LV NV

How could I have missed this?

Yes it ended too precipitously, yes there was uncertainty at the end, but no it was a realistic tale.

See here. I freelance edit for publishers. I know of an an authoress who experienced this precise occurrence. The lure of the 'Big Apple' is powerful, but a grounded writer can work things out. Poor Randy needed that grounding. Her husband finally got through.

What was missing? Randy was most likely carnally faithful. To put her husband and we readers at ease Slirpuff could have added more New York; more Randy in New York, more Randy pushing that Gotham temptation away. Slirpuff didn't have though. If Randy's husband believed her then it should be good enough for the rest of us.

Thanks! Great story; a true five. I'm sorry I hadn't read it earlier. I missed it. Guess I must be getting old.

And no Harry it wasn't a turd.

No basis for any kind of reconciliation in this story. She cheated on him the entire time. She dated that rich guy, she admitted to kissing him and if she admitted that, she did more. She didn't wear her wedding rings, she was never in her room to answer calls, no matter what time, day or night. She may not have fucked anyone but I would bet she did. She was seen on national television not acting like a married woman. She was conceited, self centered and hateful to everyone but her NY friends. How could there be anything left for the husband to hold on to?

You wrote a good story, but you didn't right one that justified the ending. She wouldn't have given up her celebrity lifestyle. She was drinking more and if she didn't already, she started smoking cigarettes and probably pot to go with her famousness. Not much left for him to want. After that long a time being treated like a servant how in the hell could he still have any love for her.

must be a brit.

She broke the agreement by going to the charity event. She basically broke the marriage by never thinking about anyone other than her self. She did not give up New York or the advise of her agents and therein lies the guarantee that sooner or later she is going to have an affair. Love your work but this ending does not convince me.

no matter what the wife does, she going to be forgiven.....if they would have gotten a divorce, she would have gotten every thing because that's his style.

not as good as the opening chapter, primarily due to the rushed ending. There was so much left unaddressed. Was she still traveling to NYC by herself? I feel like her turnaround lacked sincerity. She didn't have a come to Jesus moment. It just seemed that she still didn't get it.

I still give it five stars for the emotional depth and plot development.

Randy emotionally cheated on him over and over again and is simply too stupid and self absorbed to change her ways. Steve is a masochist and a willing cuckold of sorts despite his protestations.

The whole story left a bad taste in my mouth. The only character who seemed to have a modicum of intelligence or integrity was Randy's father. The rush to reconciliation at the end was especially off putting.

As usual the writing is good but it was a very frustrating read. In the end nothing was changed, really. Sorry for the kids. Steve got what he wanted. Randy is too stupid to see anything beyond herself.

The story was brought donw by the ending.

There is absolutely no sense of character development for Randy.

There was an opportunity for that after her alone session with the counselor but she immediately falls back on her old pattern with an aditional dose of blackmail, which makes the reconciliation unbelievable.

The ending was a let down. It's nice that she "gave in," but it was too abrupt and very out of character for that character.

Not only YOUR worst story, but it's a contender for the worst crap ever posted! After 2chapters, and FIVE pages of her doing whatever the fuck she wants, ignoring her kids, cheating MULTIPLE times, on national T.V., no less,etc. etc., in A SINGLE paragraph, you have the spiteful, hateful, self absorbed and monstrously narcissistic slut show up on the doorstep, throw him a pity fuck, probably with someone else's sloppy seconds, and suddenly it's all o.k. again? I've seen used toilet paper with better writing!

ive read a couple stories now where the wife gets caught dating other men. and what does the pussy husband do. he bitches he gets mad he starts to divorce her. then he caves and just takes her word for it that she never had sex with them. in this POS story the wife abandons her family, lies to her husband goes out on dates. all on national TV. and what does this pussy do. takes her back. the sad thing is this dipshit never even checked to see if she was cheating. he just takes her word for it 1 * and i wish i could give it less..

The problems with the wife never got resolved by either counseling or by themselves. World revolving around her and what she doing to the family is still there. Wife being so self center and the husband keep putting up with it, even in the end she hasn't change at all. Overall idea is very good, but the author is a COMPLETE LETDOWN in addressing all the issues in the story.

Nothing got resolved. She's just a cheater waiting to happen, holding resentment and contempt for her husband.

Hahaha you have to be joking what a pussy is this husband this site displays men like pussy whiped, cuckold idiots without a little of self respect if my wife would be like this whore she would have flee the country by now haha what a shit

She spent months disrespecting him, then she said one word 'we' and all is forgiven. Fine if there is reconciliation but the work entailed to make that happen has to be far far greater than the author has produced in this story.

There has to be a balance to a story, it has to be believable. This looks like the author just got fed up and ended it without any real thought or respect for the readers. There is that word again 'respect'.

That I've read in a long time. No one in their right mind would put up with the kind of bullshit that she's shoveling. Flying to New York, not having her phone with her, dating, dancing, and kissing other men is not cheating on her husband? He needs to dump her sorry ass now, because, soon, she's going to start to tell him that he's holding her back and that it's his fault that she's not as successful as she could be.

Wife is a self-centred slut, giving it up on national T.V. Two chapters of her doing what and who she wants, whenever she wants. She grudgingly says sorry, but is completely unrepentant. And then you quite literally disregard everything you had written for two chapters, all the conflict, all her cheating (yes, she was cheating her family) and utter contempt being left completely unresolved, and you more or less write, at the very end; “And then they lived happily ever after!”

I guess I must be a bit slow, because everytime I read one of your stories, I always find myself hoping that you might actually at least attempt to write an ending, instead of being your usual lazy self with a tacked on, 5 sentence ending that in no way ties in with what came before! Writing 'The end', doesn't make an ending, only believable resolution does that, but I guess, believability and logical resolution aren't your forté, are they?

There were only two ways this could have been reasonably resolved. Either, 1. She completely gave up writing, or at least, going to any party or event without her family with her, and no unplanned or unannounced meetings for any reason, AND makes time for family time on a daily basis, or; 2.They get divorced. Not rocket science to choose one or the other, instead of saying; "And then everything worked out, somehow magically or something. The end.”

A leads to B leads to C etc.

In this failure A leads to B leads to......4583. Yep. Not only did you skip over all the normal steps in the alphabet, you started counting instead! The only people that would call that a logical progression, are housed in asylums!

Why do your done-wrong-to husbands almost always refuse to read or listen to the messages from their straying spouses? One of the most potentially interesting parts of a conflict is when the combatants communicate.

Quite a good story and then nothing. Why not write an ending after building a stood story. "Good story piss poor ending"

MAYBE she wasn’t sleeping with him, but then why did she lie about where she was that night? And what about all the other nights she was unreachable? And when she IS home, it’s like she’s not there.

I don’t know why she wants to stay married. She obviously enjoys her new life more, why not get a divorce and be free to enjoy it to the fullest?

“but I'd made commitments and wanted to show them that I could be relied on." – It’s nice that she’s worried about commitments, how about her commitments to her family?

“it's just that stupid things keep happening to me,” – Huh? Stupid things happen TO her? SHE doesn’t do anything stupid?

I agree with those who feel that the ending was forced, completely out of character with the rest of the story.

Her sudden epiphany that her family was more important than her career, still no explanation about her "non-dates dates", and where was she when he called her in New York at all hours.

Like everyone else said good story up to the abrupt ending.

She is completely clueless. She wants the fame, the money, the adoring minions but she doesn't want to give up her kids (not too much about giving up her husband). She would be slutting around more except for the fact that she keeps showing up on TV. Better keep her on a VERY short leash.

And really didn't meet your own standards

She says one word and then gives him a roll in the hay and all is well? She completely changes - overnight? I'm sorry. This has to be your worst ending - EVER! She's a lying, cheating cunt and the very first thing he should do is demand that she get tested for STD's. She magically finds time to write four books and have time for her husband and kids? I don't think so. She has bright lights and dollar signs in her head and nothing is going to change that. He should be divorcing her, getting full custody, alimony, child support AND a huge cut of her future earnings. If the situation were reversed and HE was the one doing what she had been doing, people would be yelling for his balls. She should pay the same price. Terrible, unrealistic ending.

Another example of an author wanting a reconciliation regardless of the fact that he has placed his characters in positions where a reconciliation is so unbelievable that the entire story becomes the electronic equivalent of the paper on the floor of a birdcage.

Easily the worst piece of cheating WHORE wife apologist SHIT this CUCK craving, male bashing, RAAC author has produced "so far"!

Nice job ..... ASSHOLE!!!

Absolutely the most selfish female character I have read in a story.... She is still involved with the same publisher and circle of people, nothing will change long-term..... She is a new bred snob, she will be back to her old ways when she feels like the people around her are not on her level.. This man is the worst kind of duck, he thinks he has it figured out.... Terrible story, so unrealistic, 1****

The ending seemed a bit abrupt. What really changed?

Messy dialogue, mixed POVs and generally bad writing. Get an editor.

On top of all that, the main character is a cuck. I'd rate this 0/5.

You write well but the story just collapsed at the end. What changed? what happened to make her change? Did she change? What about Tony and New York? Topo many unanswered questions. Seems like you just got tired and ended it.

She proved to be extremely selfish and in reality such people would not change. But may be you are only telling a fairy tale?

Everything else...not so much. She publicly humiliated him on national television... not once, but twice. His sister-in-law Carol, his mother-in-law, and the nanny Donna have been better wives to him and mothers to HIS children than Randy has been. Randy keeps shouting that she isn't cheating on Steve. But if you asked a show of hands from her parents and sister, Steve's co-workers, and her marriage counselor, I wonder what the resulting verdict would be. What constitutes cheating always differs if you are the one cheating or the one suffering from your cheating. Divorce her. Steve owes it to his children.

Like everyone says...her switch at the end was random, abrupt and out of left field. Your lead up was to a divorce b/c of her stupidity and she just suddenly changes? Not great writing, especially considering how well all the rest of the story was written. Felt like you wanted reconciliation so you forced it.

I agree with wonder203 the ending was poor with too many unanswered questions.

Disappointing!

I usually enjoy your writings or stories, and this one started out pretty damn good BUT, I have, that in my opinion, the ending to this story is also pretty damn BAD. for instance what about Tony ? and did she actually screw him, or the young guy she was making out with on the dance floor that he seen on the television ? And if he found out about it and what would he have done about it ? SO MANY questions have been left unanswered. Anyway, as far as giving you any sort of a rating at this point, and for this particular story, well I'll wait till " maybe later " to give you one because again, in my opinion, I would have to give it maybe a 1 star or possibly a negative one star. soooo, finish the story ( and I know you can do it ) or no rating sorry.

I enjoyed the writing but you need to get an editor, for the grammatical errors and such

This had all the elements of a very good story and then it got lost. Was this one of your stories where you started out to write a BTB tale and then switched it? It was all set up and then down it went in the last few paragraphs.

As much as I like your writings (usually) I keep wondering if you have to pay to have your work edited? If so you are not getting your money's worth! I have only a high school education and can easily pick holes in everything from sentence structure to spelling errors. I haven't tried to run them through Microsoft Word but suspect some of those problems would even be caught that way. Just saying the quality of your writing would improve substantially with an editor who really speaks/writes the English language as their main means of communication.

After SHE broke the agreement( she was dating Tony and kissing him on national tv, what happened to " do nothing with someone else you would not do in front of spouse"? I guess if there was another page or chapter it would be describing how Steve went to NY with her and sucked Tonys cock to get it hard and wet enough to fuck Randy while he watched and waited to do clean-up duties. Steve grew a pair and then cut them off HIMSELF and handed them to her on a silver platter.

-1* This story made me ill. Bad does not begin to describe it.

it was good. It seemed like a normal relationship, from beginning to end actually. One gets some success, and it goes to their head, leaving everything else behind, reasoning that it would be better in the long run for the family. Most guys do that, when they take overtime, or dangerous jobs, or work in a hostile environments, so it can lead his family to a more comfortable place in the end, only this time it happened to the wife. Now here is the husband who is responding the same way the wives do when their husbands are away a lot, to better their lives or future. Nice representation, from the other side of the tracks.

He should of just divorced her and got on with his and the kids lives. Left her to her writing and the glamorious life in New York.

Uhh and why was that..so she didn't have to explain dates

No way in hell she didn't cheat if this was not fiction

Facebook profile of dearbornmt@yahoo.com for details of married female serial chea4ting college instructor in Helena Montana loved male students that were younger than her and had muscular arms. If they were not receptive to advances she threatensened to flunk them-even told one she would falsely accus him of raping her

Yep faithful

Stupid him...believes she isn't cheating because she agrees to take lie dtector test....but she does not take one...foolish male

Take the kids and leave her ass behind. Get the friggin divorce fool. She'll want the good life in NYC soon enough..and the men that go with it.

"Facebook profile of dearbornmt@yahoo.com for details of married female serial chea4ting college instructor in Helena Montana........."

You've posted this blurb about the Montana college Instructor on at least a dozen stories the last few months. What's your point? That's an email address not a web or facebook URL you keep posting. What are you expecting people to do? Send her an email, and ask for pictures? You need to either knock this shit off, or write a story about the alleged "Married Female Serial, etc......."

Gone for days at a time. Does not answer the phone at all hours. Is seen in a club open mouth kissing a stud who is fondling her ass. Is seen on TV as a date for a Producer who plans to take her on a cruise. Doesn't wear her rings?

Okay, she loves her rock (hubby) at home, probably loves her children, lives in another exciting world and is very likely doing a little more than having dinner and drinks with studs out of town.

Solution, he needs to convince her that it is a friendly divorce and the reason - she'll most likely not feel like a slut that way and go along with it and visiting rights with the chance that later they might date and see about getting back together. In other wards play her with patronizing simplicity of being BFF's and seeing how far her career could go and she would not feel guilty about having to be home when she needed to be elsewhere.

Now, get a life and let her go, she has been gone for over a year and kidded herself so...play the game - just get her gone, she can go back to real life in a year or two or...more likely, some wealthy playboy stud will probably snag her and she'll become a Trophy with occasional trysts for swinging and/or network entertaining.

They had a real marriage and mostly she valued it but as she spent more and more time flirting, networking and dating - a whole new life and world came about. Years from now she MIGHT feel bad..maybe, but he'll be happy with a real wife!

but the end was a little abrupt. After all the broken promises and everything it would be very, very hard to believe she meant what she said and to just let her move back in based on her word is asking a lot of the reader. I still gave it 4 stars but with just a little more time in the reconciliation dept it would have gotten 5.

The ending just happened with very little explanation why.

Great story right up to the end. A year and a half of frustration and anxiety on his part and in just a couple of sentences and " You are stuck with me" all is happy ever after. I don't think so. Why waste all of a great story with a conclusion that sound like, oh well dinner time, gotta go?f7a3

to a fizzle of an ending. Did she play around in New York? Unanswered. Why did she suddenly change? What brought that on?

Pure bullshit.

Extremely lame ending.