All Comments on 'Lesbian love'

It has great potential.

A few typos to clean up, of which one was extremely comical in a good way.

' Finally I feel hole '

You can't be blessed with a more appropriate typo.

The lines need to be broken up for an easier read. As is, they read like long winded sentences.

' I touch her

but my hands are so sweaty

I'm scared to breath(e) '

See? Easier to read.

' I touch her but - my hands are so sweaty - I'm scared to breath(e) '

See? Another comical moment in your favor. These things are easier to notice when lines are broken up.

Keep at it.