All Comments on 'A Last Resort'

5* Thank you, a dramatic and tense story with a (sort of) happy ending. You built the tension very effectively and you kept the precise ending hidden until your final reveal. Jim arrived just in the nick of time.

Please keep writing even if some of your comments are negative.

I guess Branson might be safer!

4

At least one guy had the ability to see what was happening and how to stop it. What fools some people are and gullible to be tricked by preditors.

This may be worse than your 1st story. What is the purpose of the story?? It's boring it's not in any way erotic it's obvious where the story is going....

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Author....did you. REALLY think this was good?

Other than messing up the acronym, pretty well written with a solid plot. Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus, by the way. Good effort and I for one would like to see more.

For serial predators and rapists, Paul and Olivia seemed woefully unprepared for the possibility one of their intended marks would become violent. Were I running their scam, I would find a way to restrain or isolate the intended cuck until I could get a read on how he would respond to being dominated. In reality, Dave should not have been able so easily to overpower and incapacitate a career felon with a fetish for cuckholding.

Very nicely structured BTB for the bad guys

I didn't care for your story that much. found it kind of boring, but don't give up writing, you show potential.3 ***

Good story, not the typical tale told here. I liked it

I don't like the switching of POV stories. I did like the storyline. 4 stars.

Grim. That’s about as erotic as a funeral.

The story was okay, though not smooth due to (probably necessary) perspective shifts. The aim of the author was obvious…so the approach to the plot was a bit heavy handed. Minor errors were present throughout the story, including taunt muscles and boarding a dingy. 😀

Good story! I look forward to reading more from you!

Nice. These "Alpha" males think they can do whatever they want to other people. Paul's arrogance overlooked that Jim was not the little guy Dave was. Guys like that need a beatdown to make them humble.

Why didn't Dave and Mary warn their friends?

FINALLY! A violent well deserved ass whippin for the predator! I will read you again!

Like the story a lot- it was original and NOT boring like some say. Am not a fan of Dave and Mary slinking out with their tales between their legs, not saying anything to Jim and Sue. Mary was raped, and they should have fought back somehow. I suppose that was to show the difference between them and Jim the hero, but still..... And I don't like the underlying theme that 'beautiful' people will only associate with the average ones if there's something they want from them. But still a good read, and it's always good to see the good guys come out on top.

awwwwww Paulie pushed his "winkie" too far and it almost left him.......good thing it stayed around to remind him of his bad judgement and decision making. Keep pushing in the wrong direction and you will eventually run into a course correction you can't handle.

Sorry couldn't stop a nautical theme......lol.

I, too, was confused shadowjack17, but SNUBA is a real underwater adventure, with its own website (snuba.com). Interesting array of comments thus far…including the incomparable Harryin VA.

A good underdog story is always appreciated. In my life I have met Alphas and Betas but I never hear any of them use that term in the first person. Good read overall. I'm sure I'll keep out an eye out for more.

No the "Alpha" can spend time with a true Alpha named Bubba. I think he will find that his new role will be much more a nightmare than fun on his part. Now Bubba and his friends will have a great time with his mouth and butt. Olivia will find her time in prison hard as she will not be giving orders but become a play thing for the bull dikes and guards. Good thing she likes it up the ass as that will be her new norm.

lost me at the wife swap tag. That it ended badly for some of the characters, no big surprise. In reality, it's probably far worse, more often than people realize.

Yow! Not what I was expecting.

I think it would have been more interesting had the alphas been better seducers and gave their targets a truly amazing experience but this was entertaining.

Thanks!

Good job. Keep it up.

Looks like the last page of the story is missing.

Well paced and constructed. The theme was developed in an interesting way, with two couples getting into the flow of things; both reacting in opposite ways. It was almost like having two stories in one. 4*

Your writing skills are very, very good. The story though, a wee bit too over the top.

But as a story that was meant to appeal to the pantie wearing cum guzzling cuck crowd and the anti-cuck crowd you served both sides enough that odoreater my not be screaming through his closet door at you.

I wish that you had alerted readers to the non-consensual aspect of this story. I would not have read it if you had. Please understand that, for various reasons, some readers may not wish to read such stories, and that it is a welcome courtesy to your readers to allow them to pass on stories like this one.

Gave it a decent rating because of the enthusiasm the writer has. One thing in the story, a 6'3 220 pound guy would never become a SEAL, would be too big. Those guys have to get out of escape hatches on subs and so forth, they usually are less than 6' tall.

In terms of writing, there was a lot of description in here, which is a common thing for starting writers. For example, you go on and on about being an average couple and keep doing that. You don't need to, once it is established people know that. Or when they meet people, we don't really need to know what they do for a living, it doesn't matter. The problem with excess description is it interrupts the flow of the story, it gets to be irritating. Again, make a descriptive point and move on.

The technique of writing is important but so is the flow and the emotion. At times it comes off as if the person writing it doesn't have feelings, it is almost all technical writing. Like when they are talking about not having sex before marriage, it really sounds like two robots discussing it, not human beings. Likewise, they talk about sex toys and 'do an analysis of it', even the most hardcore nerd is not going to be like that, it makes them less than enjoyable as characters.

I am not writing this to discourage you, far from it. Try reading the story out loud and see how it sounds, that often brings out both the strengths and weaknesses. I liked the plotting, it had a good arc, but it needs a little more of the emotion/human aspects:)

Hard to feel sorry for any of the characters in this story. All the characters were cheaters of at least thinking about being cheaters.... The really bad guys paid a price but there were no good guys that I could see.

Love the fact that MC/Missus MC are not the typical Literotica physical specimens. Well-played!! The back story got a bit long-winded and containing a lot of extraneous info-- interesting, but it just delays the plot. For example, their kids' pedigrees had nothing to do with the plot. As an interested reader, I was actually wondering if SEAL Team 3 was going to save Mom and Dad from Paul and Olivia. Also, with so much exposition, you miss a lot of opportunity to "show, don't tell". A long commentary starts sounding like a travelogue or a shareholder's report. Good... but dry. When it finally moved, it moved along well.

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On a side note, very few Navy SEALS are 6'3"/220. Most are swimmer types with fit with physiques attuned for distance and endurance. The big/muscular guys require too much daily maintenance and are are the first to break down during Hell Week. Moreover, bodybuilding and "lone wolf" types are not good team members--anyone who's made it through that grinder and the many following courses to earn a trident, knows he did it both alone and as a team member. In fact, members of this organization generally refer to their job as "on the teams". Very Type-A but also constrained-- excelling in those intangibles of character, sacrifice and determination.

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Good writing, but suggest you get a couple of beta-readers. And use an editor. If you don't want to strangle your editor, he/she ain't doing their job! 5/5!

I love it when married couple stick together thru thick and thin.

Nice story Mr. JustSomeWords.

It was a fun read. Always enjoy the asshole predator becoming impotent. It would have been nice if Olivia had fallen face first into the broken glass, giving her a Frankenstein vibe for the rest of her life. It was fun anyway. Thanks for the effort.

A well told story with some very good characters. It is great to see the little guy get his due. Look forward to more from this author.

Everybody is tough until they get punched in the face... that's a true life lesson that unfortunately most people gotta learn the hard way

"These alpha males" blah-blah. Dude, this is a figment of imagination, fairly absurd one, not a real event.

Why would anybody want to do such a scam? It is clearly too dangerous because you never know whom you would run into.

Two things that are pure BS:

1. You cannot persuade anybody into sex if they have a thing against it, "as beautiful as you are" or not.

2. If somebody grabs you for a crotch you will not get an erection, in fact it will be exactly the opposite reaction. This cliche used in LW by BTB authors ("my little head thinks this way") is a silly BS that these lousy writers keep on copying from each other.

You have some plot that you actually copied from another author (without due credit) but you made it quite absurd. Yet another mediocre story. 2 stars.

I liked it, please continue your efforts. This story had several dynamics that are common in LW and you handled them pretty well. The nay sayers will always find something to complain about and you can be damn sure someone will say it is unfinished or too similar to another story. There are usually a few comments from some knowledgeable folks that offer great advice, so be sure to take notice of those. It takes a bit of courage to offer up your work for scrutiny by thousands of strangers, best of luck in your future efforts..

Good story, well written and please keep writing. Some people forget these are stories and not real life

I have a question, what exactly is SNUBA as in SNUBA diving? Should that not be SCUBA as in Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus?

Hhmmmpf, yep, you betcha. Total BS! LP

THAT is how a real man defends the woman he swore to cherish in marriage VOWS.

Men with a backbone - kudos for bringong a bit of sanity to an illogically immoral social erosion.

Good strong realistic marriage. That aside many couple go with the intention of a wild vacation and so go party to much and find that they experience a possible marriage ending experience. I know of a couple of both and the some that go looking to do it still have a large number that freak during and it devestates their marriage. A much older couple years ago had no kids and went on two or three trips a year. They would only do crazy shit on those trips a both partisapated . Another very high drunk last night nearly destroyed a 30 year marriage. A third married 27 years went four night trip to Jamaica. Got massages while drunk during the day that was lots of touching in sexual manor. That night a night club drinking heavy partying with a few couples snd some locals wound up on the beach all the couples in a state of fucking but a local skins in in the heat of it and put his big cock to her mouth while hubby pounded from behind. Both stoned and drunk out of character she opened and before they knew it hubby finished and the local fucked her next with fury . Laying spent hubby put his dick in her mouth another stood over with her pussy over his mouth while the guy and another would dp his wife brutally. Back at the room waking to his wife still being fucked from behind by a different guy while he pushed her face into the others pussy. He ran to bathrooms threw up then started to yell chasing them out . It nearly killed there marriage even it happened accidentally basically in a state of being inebriated.

Great Story!! Loved it!!

Good story. The good guys win again.

Anonymous about 2 months ago Hhmmmpf,

For sure.Anyone would think it was fictional.

FYI. SNUBA.Diving using a regulator connected to an airline.instead of a tank.A cross between snorkeling and scuba.

Mixed emotions and feelings about this story’s content. Rape is not a story which I enjoy. Regardless of how it ends up. I wii let others rate this story.

Well written and the ending is perfect...

5🌟s

Fred

Excellent story! Really like your writing skills. Hate the fucking dot dot dots and consider that as a bad habit picked up only by reading stories here. I've read tens of thousands of manuscripts, short stories, novels, etc, etc,,, and consider it a very bad habit. Still I gave this story 5 stars, BIG ASS FUCKINGSTARS for the story. Going to follow and read your last story before ending my night.

Just a constructive criticism. 3,000 words in all you disclosed was mostly background. A good rule of thumb is “show then tell”. You’re a good writer but you aren’t hooking readers interest early enough. “Show” the reader what the story is about. Then “tell” them how you got there.

Did no one miss the “Nici” versus “Nisi” confusion? Wasn’t sure if both spellings are commonly pronounced the same way or not. :-)

Very good story!!!!!

3 pages build up with only 2 paragraphs worth of revenge. Not nearly enough. Would of been nice if the slut had her face chopped up so that neither of them have anything left.