A Royal Pain

I am so sorry that you were hounded out of your job and home and felt you had to take refuge in the mountains. There was not much I could do to limit the damage being done without humiliating my daughter and taking the risk of losing her. If I am to educate and train her to be an effective ruler, she must not lose my trust or her respect for me.

That sounds very selfish to you I'm sure. I am not talking about individuals here, but the future of our country. If this weren't so personal, I'm sure you would agree.

Cordelia has been roaring about like a bear with a sore tooth ever since you disappeared. She has the staff, me included most days, scared to make a peep around her. I dare not let her out of the palace for fear she will terrorize some innocent civilian over a triviality.

I got Cordelia to sit and talk to me earlier this week. The conversation went very much like this: I loathe him and he is a liar, I loathe him and never want to see him again, I loathe him and hope he is miserable, I love him and can't get over him.

As your Queen, as a mother, I am asking you, repeat asking you, to come here and talk to Cordelia and perhaps find a middle ground so we can return to normal and move forward.

Your Queen and I hope, friend:

Sophie

Ducky set a steaming mug in front of him and sat down.

Ren asked, "You have a notebook and a pen?"

"What kind of an officer doesn't have a notebook handy."

Ren snorted and said, "The retired kind with nothing to write and no one to write to."

Ren got up and rummaged around in a cupboard and came up with a brown paper bag and a felt tip. He sat down, ripped the bag in half then picked up the marker.

Your Majesty:

Thank you for your kind words. Your missive was delivered by Sergeant Major Brooks and was a welcome intrusion into my busy schedule.

I quite agree that trying to teach Her Royal Highness anything is a daunting task that must be addressed for the good of the nation.

After considering your kind invitation to visit the palace I find I must regretfully decline.

Although it would certainly be a delight to bask in Your Majesty presence, I find I am more than indifferent to the company of your daughter.

I strongly suspect she feels the same about me and my presence would do nothing but cause further displays of choler.

With Deep Regret, Your Loyal Servant,

Major Renville Davidson (ret)

He handed it to Ducky and took a sip of his coffee.

Ducky carefully folded the paper and buttoned it into a shirt pocket.

"You know she will just send me back again?"

"Good, bring me some salt, sugar and flour." Ren said.

The Sergeant Major drained his coffee and stood up. He came to attention and barked, "Sir, permission to withdraw?"

"Post, Sergeant Major, dismissed"

Ducky patted his shoulder on the way out.

A week later he was looking for any vegetables he had overlooked and turning the soil over to prep it for next year.

He heard a noise and looked down the mountain. There was a procession of people heading his way. By his stride he knew Ducky was in the lead. He moved to the porch for a better look and realized the next person in line was the Princess.

She was wearing a camouflage jacket and pants, her long blond hair was in a ponytail and she had a floppy camo hat on.

The next person in line was Queen Sophie, she was dressed much like her daughter but was cradling a hunting rifle in her arms.

He stood on the porch until they were close then stepped down and bowed to the Queen, "Welcome Your Majesty, Your Royal Highness."

The Queen handed her rifle to Ducky and gave Ren a hug, saying, "How very nice to see you again, Renville. Isn't it nice to see the Major again Cordelia?"

Head down she mumbled a, "Yes mother."

The Queen said, "What a marvelous view you have. It was a very pleasant hike to reach your home."

"I do enjoy the view Your Majesty," he conceded. "Perhaps we should get you out of the sun?"

He gestured them toward the cabin and followed them onto the porch. The Queen stopped at the door and said to Cordelia, "Perhaps you could take a turn around the property while Renville and I have a private chat." She walked in the cabin followed by Ren and Ducky.

When Ducky closed the door, he saw the Princess standing in the sun with her mouth hanging open. He rushed around the table to hold a chair for the Queen then took a seat saying, "Well, whatever shall we chat about Your Majesty?"

"Oh Renville, don't be like that, it doesn't suit you."

"Like what your Majesty?" he asked innocently.

"Bitterly clever, that's how," she told him. She turned and said, "Ducky are you going to make coffee or just stand there holding the pot."

"Sorry Your Majesty, coming right up," he replied. He reached into a bellows pocket of his field jacket and brought out a pound of his special blend coffee beans.

"Well, no need to ask how you feel about Cordelia then is there," Sophie began.

"What do you mean how I feel, I barely spoke to her," he protested.

"Oh, come now, you never took your eyes from her from the moment you saw us," she said smiling.

"I had my eyes on you Ma'am, you were carrying a rifle."

"Yes, and I haven't decided which of you two I'm most likely to use it on. So, nice try Major but it won't wash, just admit your feelings," she said exasperated at him.

"She is Her Royal Highness nothing else, I did my duty, nothing more," he said evenly.

"My god you are just as hardheaded and stubborn as your father. He actually went down on bended knee once to try to tell me he didn't love me, the fool. He was just as transparent about his feelings as you are," she said testily.

"Ducky if you are finished eavesdropping, perhaps you could pour the coffee," Ren said.

"Yes, please Ducky, pour and then leave, give us five minutes then send in Cordelia," the Queen instructed.

"Are you sure Aunt Sophie?" he asked her. "If this isn't done just right it will be a disaster for all of us."

"Wait, what is this aunt business, is that true?" Ren wanted to know.

The Queen answered, "Yes, of course it's true. Duckworth here is my oldest sister's youngest child. I changed his diapers and helped raise him. How did I do Renville, do you think?"

Ren said, "Duckworth, really? I think you did a fine job, Your Majesty. I know why you didn't want everyone to know about this, but you could have whispered it in my ear, Duckworth."

"Major or not, you call me Duckworth again and I will rip your tongue from your head and shove it up your... um well, yes," he fumbled to a stop at the look the Queen gave him.

He regained his composure and poured two mugs of coffee and set them on the table with the sugar bowl.

"I regret we have no fresh cream, Your Majesty," Ren informed her.

Ducky came to attention and asked, "With your permission, Your Majesty?"

"Go ahead, five minutes," she replied.

"Your Majesty, I don't know what to say or do that will make any difference to the Princess." Ren confessed.

"Well, calling her Cordelia would be a start. Tell her how you feel, if she won't accept that your conscience is clear, you will have tried."

"But what if she still rejects me?" he said on the edge of tears. "How would I carry on, Sophie?"

"Badly, I expect," she said sadly.

She had opened her mouth to say something more when there were two loud knocks on the door. Ducky stepped in an announced, "Her Royal Highness, Princess Cordelia."

She marched into the room with fire in her eye. She was in hiking boots and mussed camo's, her floppy hat had been left somewhere and her ponytail was coming apart leaving wisps of her long blond hair floating around her face.

She had never looked lovelier to Ren. He rose to his feet to greet her, but she never gave him the chance.

Putting her hands on her hips she roared, "I suppose it was your idea to leave me out in the broiling sun to be eaten alive by insects, wasn't it?"

"No my dear, it was my idea. Renville and I had some matters to discuss privately," her mother explained calmly.

"Well then why didn't you take him outside to let him bake."

The Queen slapped her palm down on the table, saying, "That is going just a little too far, Cordelia."

Cordelia had jumped at her mother's show of emotion and sounding quite contrite said, "Yes mother, I apologize. It was rude and uncalled for."

"It was rude indeed," she said sternly. She lightened her tone and said, "Besides if you look, he has a rather nice healthy tan. The mountain air and sun seem to have agreed with him, wouldn't you say?"

Cordelia took a moment to really look at him. His tan did look good on him, he was much leaner and stronger looking than he had been. Not at all unpleasant to look at, she thought to herself.

She nearly smiled when she said, "Much better than the dungeon pallor he had when last we met."

Ren laughed and nodded, "Yes Your Royal Highness, I have to agree."

"Renville, what did I say earlier?" the Queen reminded him.

He cleared his throat and said, "Yes Cordelia, I have to agree."

The Princesses eyes narrowed, and she said haughtily, "I don't recall giving you permission to address me so familiarly."

He moved behind a chair and said, "Please, won't you sit and take coffee with us, Cordelia?"

One look at her mother stifled any response she may have been thinking of. With as much dignity as she could, she moved gracefully to take the offered seat.

The Queen poured her a cup of coffee, putting in two sugars before handing it to her saying, "There that didn't hurt at all did it, children?"

Ren smiled while Cordelia frowned at the comment.

"If we are quite through with the theatrics of the meeting, I propose we get down to business," the Queen stated briskly.

"Cordelia, you love Renville, you have told me so."

Cordelia started to protest but her mother raised a hand to stop her.

"Renville, you love Cordelia, you have told me so."

Cordelia had a look of shock on her face when she heard her mother say these things.

"Now," the Queen said forcefully, "The only thing that remains is for you to say it to each other."

"I can't believe you betrayed a confidence like that mother," yelled Cordelia.

She had drowned out Ren's, "I am not sure I can do that, Your Majesty."

The Queen listened to them protesting for about a minute then abruptly stood up and leaned her fists down on the table and roared, "Shut up, the both of you."

Stunned to silence they sat there like two schoolkids caught in the act of passing test answers.

"I had hoped it wouldn't come to this but here is how this is going to be resolved." The Queen said softly.

She reached into her pocket and brought out something and set it on the table. It was a beautiful emerald ring. The stone had to be ten carats or more.

"Renville, when your father came back from the war, he married your mother. A year later she died giving birth to you. A year later, to the day, your father begged to see me. I was engaged, but your father came to give me that ring and ask me to marry him instead. I had just said yes when that madman popped into the room. Your father jumped in front of me and was shot saving me. The guards shot the assassin and sent for the doctor. Your father died in my arms."

She subconsciously rubbed her palms together saying, "I can still feel his blood on my hands sometimes."

She shook herself from her revery and said, "So, Cordelia I am leaving you here with Renville. Neither of you are to come down the mountain unless you are wearing that ring. Work it out. I love you both."

With that she swept out of the room and was gone. Ren and Cordelia sat there stunned for several minutes. They finally looked at each other then jumped up and rushed out the door. The Queen and her party were nearly at the far edge of the meadow and making good time.

Ren turned and saw that the contents of the huge packs were neatly stacked on the porch. There was one backpack still full. Ren opened it and found a note on top.

Lieutenant: Here is your salt, sugar, flour and some good coffee. Ducky

He laughed and carried it into the cabin. He went to collect more goods from the porch and saw Cordelia standing, still looking down the mountain to where her mother had disappeared.

"Well, Cordelia you better help me get this lot inside and sorted so we can finish our chores."

"If you think I am going to fetch and carry for you, you are sadly mistaken."

He dropped what he had in his arms and shrugged saying, "Suit yourself."

He went back to the garden to finish turning the remaining soil. When he was done, he went down to work his hides.

It was late afternoon when he returned to the cabin. Cordelia was sitting on the porch, he noticed she had not moved anything inside. He moved around her, not speaking and went in the cabin. He put the remainder of last night's rabbit stew on the stove to heat. He took the water pitcher and went to the well and pumped it full.

He poured some of the water into a basin and did his washing up. The stew was hot by then and he took the pot to the table and ate it right out of the pot. Using a handful of sand he scoured the cast iron pot clean.

He put two blankets on the table and added candles, matches and a book. Rolling them up he used a pack strap to secure it. He exited the cabin and started up the mountain toward the mine.

Cordelia yelled, "Just where do you think you're going?"

Ren stopped but did not turn around, "To my new home. If you want any of the food to still be there in the morning you best get it inside." He started walking and was gratified to hear her spluttering but no actual words coming out."

He went into the mine and got a fire going before it got too dark to see. He arranged his bedroll and read by the light of the fire until he was sleepy.

When he woke in the morning, he was still tired, his dreams had been strange and disjointed, but somehow erotic, all of them involved Cordelia.

After rolling his blankets, he put them on a roof support beam to keep the small critters from eating them. He would have to build a shelf as it looked like he would be living here until Cordelia gave up and went down the mountain.

He made a circuit checking his snares and collecting animals or resetting snares as needed. He had had some luck and had four rabbits to deal with. He started a fire under the smoke pit and skinned the rabbits, dropping the pelts into the brine bucket and stirring the ones in the other bucket. He spread the coals and put green branches on them to smoke the meat.

When he got to the cabin, he saw the porch was cleared of supplies and smiled at the thought of her actually doing physical labor. He went in the cabin and over to the stove to pour a coffee but the pot was cold. Frowning he felt the stove top, it too was cold.

He turned to ask Cordelia why she hadn't kept a fire going or lit a new one. She refused to look at him as she hurriedly left the cabin.

He shook his head and opened the firebox. There were four large pieces of wood in the grate but no kindling or paper. There were maybe fifty burnt wooden matches and he could see where one of the pieces of wood was scorched. He restacked the logs and got some kindling and started the fire.

He got the coffee pot filled and put on the stove, then put the griddle on the other side. Using his add water only pancake mix he whipped up some batter. He sat down to wait for the fire to heat the griddle. While he waited, he made a mental list of the things he would need to take up to the mine.

He loaded what he needed in a pack and set it by the door. Now he would have no reason to come back to the cabin. The coffee started to perk so he put his pancakes on the griddle. When they were done, he poured some boysenberry syrup he had made onto them. When he had finished his breakfast, he washed his dishes and drank another cup of coffee.

He hoisted the pack into position and walked out the door. Cordelia was huddled in her jacket on the edge of the porch shivering from the cold. He stepped into the yard and started up the hill. He heard her get up and scramble to get in the warm cabin.

He dropped his things off and walked down to tend the smoke pit fire. He had used all the batter but had left the sack on the counter, it had directions printed right on it. When he walked past, the cabin door was open and the smell of burnt pancakes was in the air.

He climbed the ladder to his meat locker and pulled out a smoked rabbit for his supper. Stopping by the root cellar he got two small potatoes and a carrot. He filled a five-gallon plastic jug with water and carried it all back up to the mine.

When he went down to get tools and materials to build the shelf he wanted, he noticed the door was still open. He could see the heat waves coming from the cabin and knew she had put too much wood in the stove. Well, he thought, she'll learn. He pulled the rabbits off the smoker and put them safely away in the meat locker.

As his rabbit stew was cooking, he made two shelves from the boards he had sawn earlier in the year. He ate then read for a bit before blowing out his candle. He decided he would make a small table and a chair in the morning.

His trap line had yielded only one rabbit so he would eat that for his supper tonight. Six of his pelts were ready to come out of the brine. He rinsed them and scraped the first layer of skin off and put them on the hide stretching hoops. Carrying them up to the cabin he hung them in the shade from the rack there.

He walked around the cabin and there was an empty soup can on the porch. What was she doing eating soup from a can when there was plenty of meat and vegetables available? Later in the winter was when you ate canned goods.

He opened the door to tell her about not eating canned things and there she was in front of the washstand. She was naked from the waist up and had shampoo in her hair. She had turned when the door opened, and her perfect A cup breasts were on display. They were perfectly pointed with no sag at all. The nipples were large and pale pink, they looked like they were standing up begging to be sucked.

She yelped, then yelped again when soap got in her eyes. She blindly searched for her towel, but it had fallen to the floor. Ren came in and shut the door, picking up her towel he pressed it to her face. She snatched the towel from him and turned her back.

"Did you get a good look, pervert?" she practically shouted at him.

"Yes, I did," he replied, "believe it or not, I have seen tits before. I will admit yours are the nicest pair I have ever seen."

"Oh, you are an impossible man," she growled. She turned to the sink and said, "I can't get the soap out of my eyes." She was blindly trying to find the wash basin and almost knocked it off the stand when her hand hit it.

He walked up behind her and picked up a washcloth and dipped it in the water.

"Here, let me help you before you wreck the place."

He pulled the towel from her face and gently washed the soap from her eyes.

"There, how's that?" he asked.

She tentatively opened her eyes then smiled when they didn't burn.

"Thank you, I can finish the rest myself."

"Nonsense," he said, "there is no way you will be able to get all the soap out of that long hair yourself. Turn around and bend over the basin."

He wet her hair some more, rubbing it to get a lather. He then worked the shampoo in and massaged her scalp. She groaned at how good it felt. It was the most sensual thing he had ever experienced, he was hugely turned on by it. Finally taking a cup he poured water over her head until the soap was gone. He squeezed her hair then twisted it to remove as much water as he could.

He started to rub her hair with the towel, but she stopped him saying, "No, no if you do that it will be a tangled mess. I just wrap it in a towel."