Amorous Goods: Interdimensional Slut

Author's Notes:

All characters in this story who engage in sexual activity are at least 18 years of age.

Please check the story tags if there are erotic genres you find distasteful and prefer to avoid. If I neglected to include a tag that's important to you, I apologize. Please believe I have no desire to offend anyone, even though I recognize that it's impossible to please everyone.

This story is my submission for the Amorous Goods, Season 03 (2022) Author Challenge. Warmest thanks to those readers who vote and comment.

Prologue

A lifelong collector of goods and objects from far and wide has passed and left the entire collection and the business built around it to his only remaining relative, a niece on a career path of her own. Vikki has taken on the task of administering the estate and liquidating the business and collection. However, she has come to find that many of the items have been cursed or enchanted with amorous powers that affect those who possess them. This is the story of one such encounter with an object found at Amorous Goods.

How I Became an Interdimensional Camslut

I stood in the wings looking out across the stage where Audrey spoke at the podium, introducing me. Peeking around the edge of the curtain, I could see hundreds of well-dressed people sitting at tables, watching her, as servers quickly replaced the cooling remains of their dinners with desserts or espressos.

My heart pounded so hard the sheet of notes in my hand shook in time with it. I tried to control my rapid breathing, fearing I might hyperventilate, even though I forced myself to breath shallowly. I tried to avoid looking constantly down at my breasts where they strained against the snug, black fabric of my dress.

Audrey finished her introduction, saying, "And now, please welcome Lilly Pardis." The crowd applauded politely. I pasted a smile on my face and stepped out onto the stage, careful not to breath too deeply, take too long a step, or bend the wrong way.

I had a very good reason, not only for my nervousness, but also for my excessive caution. All the little silver buttons down the front of my off-the-shoulder dress were just on the verge of popping off. I knew this because I had spent two hours last night removing them, then reattaching them so each one was held only by a single thread.

Not only that, but I wore no underwear. If one button came off, chances were very good they would all give way, and if that happened, then all these very important people were going to get a much different sort of show than they were expecting.

Six weeks earlier:

I sat forward on the conference room chair and scrolled through the online catalog Audrey had pulled up for me on the laptop. It was for a shop here in town called Amorous Goods. It seemed like an odd name for an antique store, but I'd seen stranger.

My assistant, Audrey, started to pack up the mess of papers and notes strewn across the table from today's meeting on next month's annual fundraiser for our employer, a cancer research foundation.

I paused on a listing for a lovely pendant necklace in a sterling silver setting. It held a large, translucent, pale green, oval-cut stone. In the photograph next to it lay a yellowed, hand-calligraphed tag that read, "Healing Crystal." In smaller lettering underneath, it added, "peridot, sterling silver, antique."

"That's very nice." Audrey looked over my shoulder at the screen. "If you don't buy it, I will." She knew I'd be interested in it, of course, and not just because it would look great with my dress for next month's gala.

"Dibs," I said. "When do you want to go?"

"Thursday," she said, reaching past me to tap the touchpad for the 'about' page of the website. "This is the owner, Vikki," she said. "We can ask her to donate something for the silent auction."

"Great," I said, "but it'll have to be after work. I have a meeting with Gil's oncologist after lunch."

She gave me a sympathetic look. Audrey knew I was dreading the news I might hear from Dr. Reeves. Gil's prognosis had been growing gradually more grim in recent months, and I was feeling increasingly frantic.

My younger brother, Gil, had been diagnosed with a rare, incurable form of cancer seven years ago, when I was in college. When I'd found out, I had felt driven to find some way to help find a cure.

I'd changed my major from engineering to Public Relations, and got down to work. I'd jettisoned my social life, such as it was, and, by the time I was 26, I had completed a Master's in Philanthropy and Nonprofit Management. I'd gotten a job as a fundraiser for the cancer charity that was funding most of the research into this particular type of cancer, and now, two years later, I led the fundraising department.

Unfortunately, the research hadn't been as successful as my fundraising efforts, and Gil's condition had continued to decline.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Audrey closed the laptop and put it away.

"I'd really appreciate that," I said. "It would be good to have a friend present."

No one appreciated my situation better than Audrey did. Her own sister suffered from a different, incurable condition. I had hired her for the assistant's job after we met in a support group and she told me how much she needed to help find a cure.

"Good," she said. "We'll have lunch, meet the doc, then after work, we'll get you that adorable necklace."

####

I woke up my phone to check the time. It was 3:17 a.m. I was sitting at my kitchen table in my nightgown. It was impossible to sleep.

The meeting with Dr. Reeves had not gone any better than I'd feared it would. He'd finally come right out and said it; Gil was dying, and it wouldn't be long now. Medical science had failed. I had failed.

I felt my heart twist in my chest once again. Fresh tears trickled down my cheeks, following the tracks of all the ones I had shed since Audrey dropped me off at home after our visit to Amorous Goods.

Dully, I picked up the necklace from the table where it lay. "Healing Crystal," the tag had said. I'd asked Vikki about it when she showed me the pendant at the shop.

She said her uncle, who had amassed the huge collection of antique and vintage items she was trying to liquidate, had written the tag. There was no other information or explanation of why he thought it might have healing properties.

It could have been just a whim, I thought, to label it "Healing Crystal." Really, what else could it be? Just New Age superstition.

Still, it was a beautiful piece. The peridot was flawless, and seemed to contain great depth as I held it up and stared into it. The setting was exquisite, too, the silver seeming more pristine even than sterling.

How would you know, I wondered, if something like this worked or not? You'd have to experiment, I supposed. My tired, stressed mind seized on this idea. I would do an experiment.

I found a small, sharp kitchen knife and rummaged in the cabinet for a bottle of vodka. After drinking a big slug straight from the bottle, I stood over the sink and poured some on the knife. Choosing a finger, I anointed it with booze, as well, and made a small cut.

Sitting back at the table, I picked up the necklace by the chain and held it over the bleeding cut. I waited. The cut bled onto the table.

Maybe it needs to be in contact, I thought. I rubbed it against the cut, left it there for a minute or two. Lifting it away, I looked at the cut. Still bleeding a little.

I looked at the pendant. There was blood on the peridot. I shook it. "Abracadabra," I said.

"Hello?" I heard someone say.

I jumped to my feet. It was a man's voice. Was someone in the house? I snatched up the little knife and stared around wildly. I couldn't see anyone.

"Hello, is anyone there?" the voice came again.

"Who are you?" I shrilled, backing up into the corner of the kitchen. "Why are you in my house?"

"In your house?" said the voice. I looked around. It sounded like he was right beside me. "I'm not. I'm...somewhere else. You called me."

"...called you?" With a jolt, I realized what he was saying.

I dropped the knife and seized the crystal.

##Zoltar##

Zoltar worked as quickly as he could to fine-tune the connection to his crystal, even as he struggled to contain his elation that his experiment had finally borne fruit.

"Hello! Hello! I need your help!" came the voice of the other-dimensional creature who had found his crystal.

Finally locating the optimal coordinates for auditory communication, Zoltar fixed them into the sands of his control tray. He began working to refine visual data streams.

"Yes, I hear you," he said. "Just a moment, and we should be able to see...there...can you see me?"

"Yes...I think so...are you at a costume party? Is that a turban?"

He reached up and touched his turban, looked down at his ornate, high-collared robe. "It's...just what people wear here," he said.

Zoltar finally fixed the visual coordinates in place and looked through the interface to see.... He goggled.

He was looking at an incredibly beautiful human woman in a filmy, almost see-through nightdress, her raven dark hair mussed, tear tracks down her cheeks. Great Merlin, he could see her nipples! It was the most erotic sight he had ever...

"...who are you?" he whispered. Of course, she heard him perfectly well.

"I'm Lilly," she said. "Who are you?"

"I'm Zoltar," he said. She stared at him.

"Seriously?" she asked, anger tainting her voice. "Is this a joke? Do you think this is funny to me?"

"What?"

"'Zoltar?" she hissed. "Like the old arcade game? Like that movie, with the kid? Like your stupid costume?"

"It's not a..."

"What is your real name?" she snapped. "Why are you doing this?"

"Zoltar is my name!" Zoltar exclaimed. "It's...a pretty common name here...not as common as Merlin, of course...or Nostradamus...."

Lilly heaved a sigh that caused things to happen to her barely concealed bosoms that made Zoltar lightheaded. "Fine. How are you doing this thing with the crystal? Where are you?"

"I made the crystal," Zoltar said, "as part of an experiment during the last conjunction 392 years ago to see if I could get one through to another habitable dimension. It's rare that anyone gets through."

"Experiment? What, are you a scientist?"

"No," Zoltar said. "I'm a wizard."

##Lilly##

I looked at Zoltar. A wizard. Really? He must be insane.

But then, I looked at how I was looking at Zoltar, and realized how very abnormal it was. It was almost as if I had held up my hand in front of me, but focused my vision on something farther away. I would still be able to see my hand, but it would be out of focus.

This seemed much the same, but when I "focused" on Zoltar, I could see that the room he was in was nothing like this room. It was more like the inside of Aladdin's tent or...a cave, maybe.

"Is this...are you from another time? ...or another planet?" I asked.

"Same time, same planet," Zoltar said. "Different dimension. Sometime long ago our dimensions separated. From what I understand, magic became a lot less common in your world, whereas it became the only way we could survive in mine."

"Survive," I said. "You can use magic to survive? Can you use it to cure someone?"

"Sure," he said. "I'm no healer, but I have an all-purpose healing spell."

"Can you cure this?" I said, holding up my finger to show the tiny cut.

Zoltar regarded it. "Well, yeah, probably" he said. "But...this crystal wasn't designed for that sort of thing. It's for communication. Audio, visual.... It's a good, solid piece of magical craftsmanship, if I do say so myself, but it's not made for casting healing spells through. I could maybe manage it, but it would take a lot of power, and that little cut should heal in a couple of days on its own, don't you think?"

I sighed, and slumped in my chair. He couldn't do it. Even magic couldn't help me.

"Right?" Zoltar said, concern in his voice. "Is a little cut like that fatal in your world? Because I could probably get the spell to work...if it's really important."

"It's not about this," I said, waving my bloody finger. "I...it's my brother. He's really sick."

"Oh," Zoltar said. "Really sick."

"Is there...can you try?" I said, hating the stupid hope welling up in me.

There was a long silence, then Zoltar said, "I can't promise anything, and...you'd owe me...."

"Anything," I said instantly. "Anything you want—anything I have—just...please, please try."

"All right," he said.

I dressed right away, wearing the necklace, and hurried out to my car. As I locked my front door, I heard Zoltar exclaim, "Wow, trees! Have you ever touched one?"

"Shh," I muttered. "You'll wake the neighbors."

"Oh, no," he said. "You're the only one who can hear me."

That should have stopped me in my tracks. Could there be a more textbook example of paranoid schizophrenia than this? A necklace talking to me, that only I can hear, promising a cure for my sick brother? But I was too focused on following my experiment through to the end.

I forged ahead, and, in twenty minutes, we were at the hospital. I was Gil's next of kin and legal guardian, and he was stable and in a private room, so I could visit him any time. Besides, I thought, 4:30 a.m. was perhaps the best time to try casting a magic spell in the middle of a busy hospital.

Gil was sleeping when we got to his room. I sat and waited until the nurse arrived for her hourly rounds, exchanging quiet greetings with her as she entered. When she was done, I took off the necklace and focused through it on Zoltar.

"Okay," I whispered. "What do I need to do?"

"Just a second," he muttered, pouring sand of several colors from small jars onto a tray in front of him. He waved his fingers over it, and it swirled into little three-dimensional shapes, like tiny abstract sculptures.

Finally, he said, "All right. Let's take a look."

He stared "past" me at Gil, and I almost had the sense he had somehow, invisibly, moved into the room with us. I could almost see him reach out to touch my dying brother. "Ah, by Merlin's magical beard," he said. "This kid's really sick."

"Please try," I whispered, like a prayer. "Please, please...please, Zoltar..."

"I'll try," he said. "It's going to take everything I've got, and it may still not be enough. But, if I can get the spell to land at all, it should help, at least some."

I watched as he moved his hands over the tray, and the little sculptures shifted minutely. After a few moments, he froze and spoke a mouthful of gibberish. Then, he vanished.

I looked at the crystal, tried to "focus" through it, as I had before. Nothing. "Zoltar?" I whispered. "Zoltar, are you there?" Nothing.

I knelt beside Gil's bed. Was his color a little better? Was he breathing a little easier? I couldn't tell.

I stayed there by his bed for a while before I decided to go home. I had work in just a few short hours. I hung the pendant around my neck, kissed my brother on the forehead, and left.

##Zoltar##

"Zoltar? Zoltar, are you there?"

Zoltar looked up blearily from where he had collapsed, face-first, onto his control tray. Colored sand caked his cheek, and he felt as if he'd been mauled by a bandersnatch.

"Who?" he muttered. "Who? What..."

"Zoltar!" It was Madea.

"What!" he said. "I mean, yes." He rubbed a hand over his face, causing a shower of sand to fall into his lap. "Yes, Madea. I'm here," he said.

"What happened?" Madea asked. "You missed our appointment. I haven't been able to reach you for days!"

"I...." Days? He'd been out of commission for days? "I'm sorry, Madea. You know I wouldn't miss our time together if...."

"But, what happened?" she interrupted. "Are you...sick? Is it...."

"No, no" he said. "I'm not infected, or anything like that. I just tried a spell that was a little too big for me."

Madea stared at him. She was a cute redhead, who'd been on a mutual weekly contract with Zoltar for almost a decade. He'd enjoyed every instant of it, and she knew he would never voluntarily miss their appointment.

"What kind of spell could make you..." she began. "You look terrible, Zoltar. Have you even been doing your longevity..."

"Listen, Madea," he said. "Could you let me contact you back a little later? I just need to, er, clean up a bit and, um, sort some things out. I'm fine, now. Everything's all right."

"...okay..." she said. "But I need to hear from you soon. We do still have a contract, after all." She gave him a sexy smile he barely noticed. He nodded and broke the connection.

Zoltar checked his chronometer. Great Merlin! He'd been unconscious for almost a week!

He checked his physical status. His health spells had held, which is why he hadn't died of thirst while he was out. But his longevity spells had to be renewed daily. He had lost...over 150 hours of his life.

"By Merlin's fucking hairy ass," he groaned. "How could I do something so stupid?" Zoltar had not aged in over a thousand years, but now, he had foolishly thrown away almost a week of what should be a nearly immortal life. "I am a damned fool," he told himself.

Hastily cleaning up his control tray, Zoltar cast the longevity spells, once more halting his aging process. He renewed his health spells, as well, making sure they were solid and somewhat more powerful than they really needed to be. Finally, he cast a personal hygiene spell, and immediately felt better for at least being clean.

He wished he knew a spell that could protect him against stupidity, but he supposed there were some things even magic couldn't accomplish.

##Lilly##

I arrived home giddy with excitement. I had just come from another meeting with Dr. Reeves. While Gil's cancer still remained severe, his health had mysteriously improved over the last week.

At first, the oncologist had been wary, warning that late-stage cancer patients often appeared to show hopeful periods of improvement, only to worsen again. Now, however, the doctor had admitted the steady progress might be a sign something fundamental had changed.

I wasn't sure what had happened to Zoltar, but I continued to try the crystal each day after work, hoping to have the chance at least to thank him. Truthfully, I was starting to believe the whole thing had been some kind of stress-induced hallucination, and Gil had just started getting better on his own.

Still, I took the necklace out of my jewelry case and held it up, trying to "focus" through it as I had before. "Zoltar?" I said. "Can you hear me?"

"Lilly," I heard Zoltar say, and saw him in his exotic cave-like room. He looked very pale and drawn, his eyes bloodshot and red-rimmed.

"Zoltar, what happened?" I said. "Are you all right?"

He sighed wearily and said, "Yes, I'm fine," he said. "Just..."

"Gil's better," I interrupted. "He's been getting better all week. Your spell worked! Thank you so much! Thank..."

"Lilly," Zoltar said, "there's something you need to know."

"What?"

"Maybe you should sit down," he said. I sat on the edge of my bed.

"What?" I repeated, a bad feeling beginning to form in the pit of my stomach.

"My healing spell," he said. "It's not permanent."

"What? You said..."

"I said if I could push the spell through using the crystal, it would help, at least a little," Zoltar said. "But it's a moon magic spell. It won't last past the new moon. In two days."

"You didn't tell me that!"

"I wasn't sure it would even matter," he said. "If I hadn't been able to land it, or if I had been strong enough to heal him completely...look, I'm sorry. I never meant to deceive you."