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All Comments on 'An Older Gentleman'

by Ed0613

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  • 3 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
VERY WELL DONE

NARRATIVE IS ENGAGING WITH GOOD FLOW AND QUITE CREDIBLE EXCEPT THAT HIS AGE SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN MID-SIXTIES.LOINS HAS BEEN SPELT AS LIONS AND SOON AFTER THERE ARE TWO SOONS WHERE ONE WAS NEEDED.

I CONGRATULATE THE AUTHOR AND GIVE 85% MARKS TO THE STORY.

CARRY ON THE GOOD WORK !

AnonymousAnonymousover 16 years ago
Well done until

the lottery part. It is not necessary really, or a bit surplus indeed.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 12 years ago
Hot

Keep more stories like this cummin

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userEd0613@Ed0613
93 Stories
155 Followers
Like to talk to both men and women about erotic writing. I am always looking for people to help me edit my work and welcome input about spelling, punctuation, syntax and the general readability of my stories. Right now, (June 2013) I am doing research for the stories I write ...