As Close as Possible

"So since I'm your wingman tonight, how about you pick out a guy?" I said.

"Oh, right. Okay." She scanned the talent pool at the bar. I saw her eyebrow raise. "Okey dokey. I got a guy picked out and a girl."

My eyes went wide, "A girl?!"

"For you, dumb dumb."

"Oh, yeah. Okay. So who are the marks?"

"Okay. The guy is the one standing at the corner of the bar. He's got on the cowboy hat and the tight butt. The girl is the redhead sitting at the high table with all her friends."

"Damn, Mom. She's pretty hot. She might be a little out of my league."

"If that girl's out of your league, then that guy's out of my stratosphere."

"Oh, come on. If anything, you're out of that guy's league."

She scrunched her eyebrows at me. "Self-awareness is important, Honey. Now, how should I approach him?"

"That's easy. I'd go with a compliment on his boots. Those look like expensive boots. I bet he's pretty proud of those. Then I'd follow up with how you love Harley Davidsons and how you love to ride on them."

"How do you know he drives a Harley?"

"Well, I don't. But you probably got a 50/50 shot with that."

"Okay, Mr. Mathematician. So what are you going to say to that girl?"

"I don't know. I've never actually approached a random chick that's surrounded by her friends at a bar before. I feel like I'm at a disadvantage here."

"Oh, who cares? All right. You're going to go over and tell a joke to the whole group. Do you know any stupid jokes?"

"I mean, I only know stupid jokes. You sure that will work?"

"It'll disarm the group. Then you compliment her on her hat. That should work like a charm."

"All right. I guess compliments are the mating cheat code. You sure you don't want me to talk to the guy first?"

"No, we can bag them on our own. I have faith in us. Good luck!"

"Yeah, you too." I said. I grabbed my drink and got up from the table. I stared down the girl as she and her friends were laughing. I could feel my heartbeat get faster as I made my way to the table. I tried my best to shake off the nervousness and put on a fake bravado. When I made it to the table all six of the ladies were looking at me with a cocked eyebrow.

"Hi ladies. Would you be interested in hearing a joke?"

The brunette sitting closest to me answered, "That depends. Is it any good?"

"Oh, God, no. I don't know any of those."

"Okay. Give it a shot." She said.

"All right. So a bear walks into a bar and goes to the bartender. He says, 'Give me a beer and a...uhh...a whiskey coke.' The bartender says, 'Why the big pause?' and the bear replies, 'Not sure. I was born with them.'"

They all started shaking their heads and giggling. "You're right. That wasn't very good. What's your name?" The brunette asked.

"John."

"I'm Tara, that's Annabelle, this is Connie, this is Debra, she's Sasha," she motioned to the redhead last, "and that's Sam." I made sure I locked in Sam's name as I quickly forgot the rest.

"It's nice to meet you ladies. This is actually my first time at this bar. It's pretty amazing. I've never seen a bar that had this cool of a vibe."

"Oh, my God, YES! That's what I was just saying." The blonde to my right said, "We've been coming to this bar for a couple years now. It's AMAZING! And they always have awesome bands." I looked over to see Mom chatting up her mark. She was letting out a big laugh and holding onto the guy's shoulder. I focused back on the girls in front of me.

"Here, pull up a chair." Tara said motioning to one near Sam. I smiled and grabbed the free chair.

"Wow, that's a really great hat." I said to Sam as I sat down.

"Oh, thank you. My Mom gave it to me for Christmas. I really only get to wear it out when we go here."

"SAM, OHMYGOD! Do you remember that one Christmas when we went sledding at Crest Hill? Remember that big jump?" Tara said

"Yeah, we nearly hit a tree. You know you're a terrible sled driver, Tara." Sam said.

"No way. You can't steer a sled with four people on it. That's impossible."

"Well, no one else seemed to have that problem that day. We all had to dive off the sled. I nearly broke my wrist!" Sam said.

"Whatever. You're fine. No one got hurt. Also, that reminds me..." Tara just kept driving every conversation. I tried to talk to Sam a couple of times, but Tara would just keep interrupting. I looked over to see Mom ordering her second drink at the far side of the bar. She saw me look over as she was waiting and gave me a thumb's up. I winked at her and turned back to the group. I tried a couple more times unsuccessfully to start another conversation with Sam.

I got a little frustrated and looked back to Mom. She had just gotten her drink and was walking back to the guy. Unfortunately, he was in a different part of the bar chatting up a younger, skinny college-aged girl. Mom noticed him and an annoyed look came over her face. She started walking back to the booth. I decided that I'd had enough of the Tara show.

"I'm going to grab a drink." I said as I stood up and left the table. I went and ordered a Jack and Coke. I walked back to the table to find Mom fiddling with her drink.

"What happened?" She asked, "It looked like you were doing so well."

"Yeah, well, I couldn't even get a word in with her. Believe it or not, one of those girls likes to talk even more than you."

She laughed, "You idiot. Why didn't you just ask her to dance? You could have talked on the dance floor." I looked over to the bustling dance floor swaying with the soft music the band was playing.

"Oh, whatever, I'm new to this." I looked over to the guy who was now with yet another girl trying to chat her up. "Sorry about that asshole."

"It's fine. Sometimes you just strikeout. Probably for the best. Now, we get to enjoy the music." We sipped on our drinks and chatted about where we've always wanted to vacation. I was a little bit surprised that Mom had always wanted to go skiing in Vale. She'd even picked out the hotel she wanted to stay at and the runs she wanted to do, and million other things that flowed in and out of my ears. I was always more of a Hawaii guy, and Mom didn't really have to right physique for skiing right now anyways. After a little while we reached the bottom of our drinks. I saw Mom looking out on the dancefloor.

"You want to dance, Mom?"

"With you?" she asked.

"Yeah, sure. Why not?"

"Okay. But only because I love this band so much." She leapt out of her seat and grabbed my hand. I nearly fell over trying to keep up with her. Ballads of pickup trucks, beer, and women in boots poured over the dance floor. Mom held my hands as she started bobbing and twirling to the upbeat music. She looked as if she had no worries in the world. I was amazed at how nimble she was given her size, spinning around me and letting loose.

The lights dimmed low, and the singer started making an announcement. We both faced the stage and Mom backed her butt up into my crotch. She grabbed my hands and wrapped them around her waist as she slowly swayed. In a low gravelly voice the singer said, "Everybody whose coupled up get close. We're going to be slowing it down for the rest of the night." I looked around and everyone was in their own little world with their partners. Mom continued to grind her butt into me as the slow, soulful music started up again. I could feel my cock getting rock solid as we swayed.

I looked over at another blonde girl on the dancefloor. The guy Mom had tried to chat up approached her. I felt her grab my hands and pull them in tighter as she ground her ass on my dick. The guy seemed to strikeout, and he looked over in our direction.

"I want to make that asshole jealous." Mom said.

"Okay, what did you have--" Before I could finish, I felt Mom pull my hands up to her tits. She pressed my hands into her soft mounds and leaned her head back onto my shoulder. Without skipping a beat, I began to knead her enormous tits. I started to grind my crotch into her butt much harder. My cock was more filled than it had ever been, and I could feel a little bit of precum start to emerge. Her head was arched back on my shoulder exposing her neck. I couldn't help myself. I laid a couple kisses right on her neck. I heard her moan softly into my ear. I looked back at the guy and he looked a little annoyed. He went back to trying to get a dance partner. I felt Mom start to turn around and I released my grip on her breasts. She wrapped her arms around my neck and stared in my eyes. It was easy to get lost in her baby blues. I felt her pull her body into mine. My cock was pressing into her crotch. Either she didn't notice, or she didn't care.

"Is he still watching?" she asked.

I looked around but couldn't see him, "Yeah," I lied.

With that she grabbed the back of my head and pulled me in for a kiss. Our lips mashed into each other, and I felt her tongue press into my mouth. I let my tongue dance with hers in our forbidden embrace. I reached down and grabbed as much of her butt cheeks as I could. I kneaded them as I sucked on her tongue. She ran her fingers through my hair as I pulled her into my crotch. She was gyrating her entire body into me. I had to pull away for a second to take a breath. Immediately, I felt her pull me back in again. My tongue was out in anticipation which she sucked it into her mouth. I could feel her backing me up and I continued to walk backwards. Eventually, my back hit a wall and I couldn't back up any further. She pinned me and continued to grind as we made out. She was definitely focusing her movements on my groin with hers. I tried to remember how she looked naked and imagined her vast, hairy body writhing on mine. I started to feel my balls start to tighten. Again, she ground her body into my cock and I started to panic. I could tell I was getting a little too excited.

I pulled away for a second and said, "Mom, I think--" she cut me off with her tongue going back in my mouth and another hard grind into my dick. I tried to back up, but the wall stopped me. I started to feel my cock start to twitch. I knew I was past the point of no return, and I just tried to enjoy the moment. My balls started bucking. I grabbed Mom and ground my cock into her. My dick kept pulsing and pulsing as I unloaded everything I had in my balls. I felt the pulses start to lessen and lessen. Mom knew something was amiss and she pulled away slightly. I could feel the huge amount of cum in my pants and my cheeks immediately went red in embarrassment. Mom looked down and saw the situation.

"Mom, I may have--" She put her finger to my lips.

"It's okay, Sweetie. It's no big deal, really." I think she could see the panic on my face. "Hey, hey, listen. It's okay. We already paid for our food, so let's just go to the car. I'll walk in front of you, and you put your hands around my hips and walk close behind. Okay?"

"Yeah, okay." I said as I hung my head in shame. I felt her hand on my cheek and she said, "Come on. Follow me." I followed her close and held my hands around her hips. Luckily, the lights were still dimmed down as we made our way out. When we made it to the car, I unlocked it and Mom got in the passenger's side as I got in the driver's seat. My cheeks were still bright red.

"Sweetie, it doesn't matter, seriously. It's okay." She said, as I kept my eyes down and looked at the huge wet stain in my jeans. I shook my head and started the car. "Hey, it was a fun night. It's still a fun night. I'm sorry I went too far trying to make that guy jealous."

"I'm just as much to blame. It's just embarrassing--"

"It's fine. Seriously." I felt her hand rest on the wet spot on my leg, and I looked up at her. She leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. "It's really kind of flattering that I can do that to you."

I put the car in drive and set off for home. I felt uncomfortable the whole time. It's not too much fun driving home with a giant wet cum spot on your leg next to your mom. In fact, makes you feel vulnerable and out of sorts. Honestly, I would prefer to be driving home naked. Mom turned on the radio to help with the awkwardness, but it did very little to help. Thirty awkward minutes later, I pulled into the garage and hopped out as fast as I could. I made my way into the kitchen and started to head to my room, when I felt a hand grab mine.

"Not even going to say goodnight?" Mom asked.

"Yeah, I'm just going to -- goodnight." I said as I tried to pull away. She pulled me back again

"Jeez. It doesn't matter, okay? We were just drinking and having fun on the town. You're acting like this is a huge deal. It's not." I kept my eyes down. "Ughhh," she said as she pulled me in and wrapped her hands around my neck. Her lips met with mine again and her tongue was poking its way into my mouth. I hesitated, then opened my mouth and let my tongue roll around with hers. She pulled away quickly and looked me in the eye. "It's just fun, Sweetie. All right?"

"Yeah. Sorry. I get it. I know it doesn't matter, but it's still embarrassing for me."

"I know, Sweetie. But I'm the only other person that saw, and I don't care at all. So no more being weird tomorrow."

"Okay. Love you, Mom. Goodnight."

"Night, Honey. Thanks for the fun night. I love you so, so much"

I went to my room and peeled off my cum-stained jeans and threw them in the hamper. I shook my head and went to brush my teeth.

I woke up before my alarm and reluctantly got out of bed. I still just wanted to stay in bed all day, but I did promise I wouldn't be weird about it anymore. Easier said than done. I showered and headed downstairs. Luckily, Mom was not in sight. I grabbed my laptop and sat down at the counter. Another boring ass day of job applications. I heard footsteps and turned around to see Mom coming down the stairs in her robe.

"Good morning, Honey. Sleep well?"

"Good morning, Mom. I slept like a log."

"Yeah, I bet you did," She said as the bumped me with her butt on the way by. I felt the blood rush to my face. Mom looked back to see me blushing. "Oh, I'm just joking. Sorry, had to get one in."

"Yeah, you got me." I said as I went back to applying.

"I actually don't have work for about a week. Do you want to do something today? I guess I don't really want to pull you away from applications. Never mind."

"No. To be honest, I don't really want to spend a second day in a row applying to jobs, so let's do something."

"Okay. Yeah. I'll go get ready and we can figure out something to do." She said.

"Perfect. It shouldn't take me too long to finish this application anyway." Half an hour later, Mom descended the stairs in a bright blue sundress. Her belly was certainly on display through the fabric, but I thought she looked beautiful. We decided to go on a picnic in the local park. We packed up a basket and headed off. It ended up being a lovely day and we had a wonderful time walking around the park. When we were getting in the car to go home, I got a call on my phone.

I answered, "Hello, John speaking."

"Hello, John, this is Kelly with Advantage Stamina. I'm actually calling because of your recent application to our sales coordinator position. We loved what we saw on your resume and we were hoping we could bring you in for an interview. Would that interest you?"

"Yeah. I would be very interested, Kelly."

"Fantastic! Well, the interview would be this Monday at 11:00 a.m., and I know you are located in Minnesota, so we would like to make travel arrangements for you. I will send you and email with all of the details you will need for travel. Does that sound okay to you?"

"Yes, that sounds perfect. I very much am looking forward to the interview, Kelly. Thank you."

"Of course. If you have any questions you can email me or give me a call during work hours, and I would be happy to help."

"Absolutely. Thanks, Kelly. I'll see you Monday."

"I'll see you then, John. Goodbye." I hung up and looked over at home who had a huge smile on her face.

"Did you just get an interview?" she asked.

"Yeah, I did. It's on Monday."

"All right! I knew you'd get one." She said as she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek. "Where is it?" she asked.

"San Francisco." I said. I could see her smile drop as soon as I said it, but she tried her best to pretend she was ecstatic.

"That's great! It's a beautiful city. I'm so proud of you."

"Thanks, Mom."

The following Friday, Saturday, and Sunday flew by. I pretty much spent every waking moment, that I wasn't applying to jobs, with Mom. Every night we would cuddle up and watch a movie together. We ended up going out to eat on Saturday and Sunday to a couple more of her favorite restaurants. We even did little bit of yoga at home on Saturday, which I found to be a blast. Well, mainly so I could watch her as she bent over and did stretches.

Mom had helped me get everything ready for my interview. She picked out the suit I would wear and the leather portfolio I would bring. I made sure I did all my research on the company. They mainly sold high-end vitamins and supplements. I was pretty sure their biggest seller was their protein powder. I had seen a lot of high-profile NFL, NBA, and NHL stars promoting it. I had read up on everything from creatine to probiotics. Even though I knew I was prepared, I felt nervous as hell. Mom could tell and she was constantly giving me compliments in an attempt to boost my confidence.

Before I knew it, the time was 5:30 a.m. and we were pulling into the airport. Mom put the car in park and gave me a reassuring smile.

"Okay. So I'll pick you up tomorrow at 10 a.m. and you'll be getting call and accepting the position by the time we get home." I took a deep breath trying to calm myself, "Hey, look at me." I gazed into her glittering eyes, "You're going to do fine. You're prepared, you're looking good, and you're a smooth talker, whether you know it or not. It's totally normal to be nervous, but you got this." I could feel her hand go to the back of my head and she pulled me in. I leaned with and felt her soft lips press on mine. I immediately felt all my anxiousness fade away. After a couple seconds she pulled away and blushed. "I love you, Sweetie."

"Love you too, Mom. Thanks." I said as I stepped out of the car with the carry-on bag in tow. The flight went smoothly. I spent the flight covering my bases trying to figure out questions I may have overlooked. When we landed, I put on my fake confidence face and hailed a cab.

I looked out at the beautiful scenery of San Francisco as we cruised on by. It really put Minnesota to shame, not that Minnesota isn't nice, but damn. This city was unbelievable. Even everyone outside the window was at the very least a 7/10 or above. The cab pulled to a stop in front of a six-story glass building. It shined bright blue in the sunlight. I took a look at my phone: 10:15. I inhaled deep and reached for the door.

The interview went better than I thought it would. I had accounted for nearly all of the questions, and I had answers at the ready. I figured out a little bit more about the sales position and where the territory was. I felt great as I walked out of the building a few hours later. Although, the more I thought about being a supplement salesman, the more I wasn't too fond of that idea. Honestly, it seemed that the pro athletes they sponsored were doing most of the selling. But I don't know how you beat living in this area, although, there's no way I could afford to live in the city.

The cab dropped me off at the hotel. I checked in and went to see the room. I slipped the card in the reader and pushed my way in. It was a pretty nice room. Just a basic setup and a great view of the city. I took my phone out and dialed "Mom."

"Hey, Honey!"

"Hi, Mom."

"So how did it go? I bet you just knocked it out of the park."

"Yeah, I thought it went really well. Thanks for helping me prepare. Pretty sure there wasn't one question we hadn't planned for."