Back Around Again

OH FUCK!!!!

Me: Well, just once or twice. But once we were exclusive...

Trevor: You mean our second date?! The day after our first date?! You went out with me and then fucked him?!

I needed to think and quick.

Me: Babe, I swear, it was only cause I was revved up from meeting you. I didn't want to go all the way on the first date, and I needed some relief. That was it.

Trevor: So, you couldn't wait one fucking day?! Was it that good?!

To be honest, it was pretty good. I was a wild woman that night, but it was really cause I needed to get it out of my system after meeting up with him.

Me: Babe, it meant nothing. We were just starting to see each other. It's really not a big deal.

Trevor: So, it was such a little deal, neither of you could tell me about it. I had to hear it from Cindy? He was fine telling her, but not me.

Me: We just didn't want you to freak out over something that happened a long time ago. Don't you trust me?

I saw Trevor ponder over the question for a second or two.

Trevor: A few days ago, I would've said absolutely. But now...

That hit me like a bullet. He doesn't trust me now, and I know if I don't change that, I'll lose him.

Me: Trevor, please. (I admit, I came off a bit pleading at this point.) Please, don't throw us away. I love you so much!

Trevor: But you don't respect me, do you?

I remember stuttering upon hearing that, thinking how could he come to that conclusion?

Trevor: If you respected me, you'd have been honest with me. I wouldn't have had to find out in front of all our friends.

Me: Baby, that's not true! I love you so much!

Trevor: I need to think.

He got up from the table at that point and left his coffee behind.

Me: Baby, please!

I was about louder then I should've been, but I didn't want him to go.

Trevor: Vanessa, I need some time to figure this out. Please respect that.

He turned and left with that.

I came home and cried into a pillow for a solid hour, trying to think of anything I could say or do to get Trevor to listen. I then got a text from Ross, saying that he was "sorry" how things worked out and asked me if I needed to be "consoled".

I damn near threw my phone through the window at that point, pissed that that walking hard-on could ruin everything!!

It has to be Cindy behind all this. She got that shit out of Ross in the first place and then told Trevor at the first opportunity.

I have to stop her. I can't let her manipulate Trevor into taking her back, so she can screw him over again.

I need a plan...

Trevor's Journal Entry-March 31, 2014

Well, that could've gone better...

I can't believe this! Vanessa's been hiding shit from the beginning!

Why couldn't she just be honest with me?! Why did she have to parade Ross around me and make me feel like a cuckold?

I didn't really think she cheated on me, or is cheating on me, but I really don't know what to think. I don't know if she's just stringing me along now until Ross becomes "more available" to her or something. Fuck, I was getting ready to marry this woman!!

Cindy texted earlier asking how it went. I told her and she said how sorry she was for what I was going through. She offered to meet up if I need a beer and chat, but I told her I needed tonight to myself.

I have to say that Cindy's been so sweet through all this. Like what she put me through before was a window for her to see how it affected me and how Vanessa is affecting me now.

I never would've thought that the woman who tore my heart out all those years ago would be a Godsend to me now, but she is. I think I'll hit up tomorrow for coffee or something, talking this out with another person and getting another perspective has gotta be helpful, right?

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 1, 2014

Great news!!

The stupid cunt's dug herself an even bigger hole and left Trevor spinning! He's hurt and confused and in prime position finally.

He's already reached out to me to have coffee, which I expertly switched to drinks. He agreed and I'm getting ready to go meet him now. Like before, I'm gonna look cute, but not overly sexy. A hint of cleavage to keep his attention, but not enough to look like I'm actually trying something.

I wasn't gonna make a full move on him, just hint that there may be better options for him out there, then slide myself in.

I'm so excited my plan's working!!!

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 1, 2014-Continued

I'm gonna try and get this down now so it's as accurate as I can remember.

I met Trevor at a bar not far from his apartment, arriving 10 or 15 minutes early to get as private a table as possible. I ordered a Vodka soda and waited for him to arrive.

He was five minutes early, true to form as always. He gave me a half smile as he got his drink from the bar and sat down.

Trevor: Hey, how's it going?

Me: I'm fine. It's you I'm worried about. How are you?

He took a deep breath before he answered.

Trevor: I'm as good as I'm gonna be for a while, I think.

Me: Have you talked to her since yesterday?

Trevor: No. She's texted and called a few times, but I let it all go to voicemail or unread. I really don't know what to say to her at this point.

Me: Well she has kinda thrown some curveballs at you. Did she at least apologize? Did Ross?

Trevor: My issue isn't with Ross. It wasn't his place to tell me what the fuck was going on with them. This is all on her.

Me: No, you're right. She definitely should've told you.

Trevor: I mean, am I just gullible? Do I just let women walk all over me? Is that what happened with us?

Me: Trevor, no! (I grabbed one of his hands at this point.) What happened with us is that I was an idiot and thought we needed to sow our wild oats and get it out of our systems. I never thought it would be the absolute end of us and for that I couldn't be more sorry that I put you through that.

Trevor: Wow, I didn't know you felt like that about it.

Me: Yeah... (I took a deep breath after this to set the mood back) But that's in the past. You need to focus on what's in front of you now. And no, I don't think your especially gullible or anything. Vanessa seems like a very sweet girl, who just wasn't forthcoming enough about some of her past hookups.

I knew I had to thread this needle very carefully if I was gonna keep Trevor ignorant of my true aims.

Me: I mean, do you think you'll be able to trust her after this? Are you worried she's hiding other things?"

Trevor: That's the crux of it. I don't know. I mean, I still love her, but now it's like I lost something in all this, and I really don't know what she or I can do to get it back.

Me: Well, I mean, you've made the effort, right? You reached out to her and were willing to talk shit out, and then she just basically threw it back at you, saying it was no big deal. I don't know, it seems like she's just trying to sweep things under the rug and tell you to move on.

Trevor: I mean, she definitely wants me to forgive and forget, but I don't know how she can expect that. We were together for a year and a half before this ever came up and she didn't even tell me. I mean, fuck, I was getting ready to propose to her.

PROPOSE???!!! This, had to be shut down obviously.

Me: Well, I'd say maybe put that to the side for now until you get your relationship figured out.

Trevor: Yeah, I know.

He sounded very sad as he said that. He clearly thought he'd found his girl. I just had to show him now that there were better options.

Me: Trevor, look, I know this sucks. You had everything pinned on her and she wasn't everything you thought. It doesn't make her a bad person (I really had to bite my tongue on this one), but she may not be the one for you.

Trevor: I guess my luck with women is still intact.

He gave a very dry smile at that. It almost made me cry.

Me: Don't say that. You're a great guy and a great catch. I'm just sorry if Vanessa didn't respect you enough to see that.

I was carefully laying a path before him. Not completely deriding the cunt, just sowing enough subtle doubt about her to get the message across that he needed to look elsewhere.

Trevor: She doesn't, does she?

Me: It certainly doesn't seem like it.

I was jumping for joy internally but keeping my shit together.

Trevor: But I still love her. Despite all this, I still do. It's not really any different than when you dumped me. I still loved you.

That made my heart sink and melt all at once.

Me: I was never trying to dump you. Just free you a bit so you could be open to new things. Granted, I didn't think it would lead back to Vanessa and you getting hurt again.

Trevor: That's not your fault. She made those choices. You're the one who let me know what was going on. I really do thank you for that.

He reached over and took my hand softly as my heart melted a bit more. I could see the look on his eyes that there were still feelings for me buried in there. Maybe they were dormant, but they were there. It was beautiful.

Cunt: WHAT THE FUCK???!!!

Vanessa's Log Entry-April 1, 2014

I was just walking, not wanting to be cooped up alone in my apartment. I just needed to clear my head, figure out a way to make Trevor see how much I truly love him and how much he means to me. I wondered and wondered, eventually making my way to Trevor's side of town.

Maybe it was subliminal, maybe I was hoping to see him so we could talk. I considered just going to his apartment, see if he would let me in to talk, but I decided a little liquid courage first might help. I went into a bar near his place and ordered a vodka soda. I was sipping on my drink when I saw them.

Trevor and the human cumrag sitting at a table together. Then he reached for her hand.

WHAT?!! He went out with that walking case of gonorrhea??!!

I stormed over to the table.

Me: What the fuck?!

Trevor: Vanessa?

Me: Yeah, you remember, your girlfriend. You're on a date with her?!

Trevor: I'm not on a date!

Me: Yeah, what do you call holding hands with this bitch?

Whore: What did you call me?!

Oops...

Trevor stood up at this point.

Trevor: Don't call her that! We're not a date. We came here to talk. About you and how you don't have any respect for me. Now you don't trust me?

Me: I trust you fine. It's her I don't trust.

Sloppy Pussy: What the fuck are you talking about?

Me: Oh, please. Like you haven't been trying to get Trevor back this whole time. You can fool him, but not me.

Trevor: She's not fooling anybody. She's a friend.

Me: Yeah, who wants to get you back. Come on, Trevor, she's been trying to sabotage our relationship ever since she showed up.

I figured in for a penny at this point.

Trevor: What has she done except point out how you and Ross lied to me?

Uh oh...

Trevor: What has she done other then be someone I could talk to while I figure our relationship out? How dare you insult her like that?

Lying Bitch: It's true, Trevor.

All time and space seemed to stop at that point.

Man Stealing Cunt: I do want you back.

Trevor's Journal Entry-April 1, 2014

I was stunned. Cindy standing there admitting that she wanted me back.

Me: You...you want me back?

Cindy: Trevor, of course I do. You're the perfect guy and while she clearly can't see it (meaning fat ass), I do.

Vanessa: See! I told you. She doesn't care about you; she just wants to steal you from me.

Cindy: Why shouldn't I? All you've done is lie to him and manipulate him. I mean, fuck, I know what I did was lousy, but I was honest with him, unlike you're slutty ass.

Vanessa: Slutty ass?! You fucked your way through college and I'm the slut? Bitch, your pussy is so beat up, it probably looks like a Roast Beef Salad!

Cindy: At least I don't need to fuck my friends on the side, behind my boyfriend's back.

Vanessa: I never...!

Me: Stop!!

Both girls stopped talking and looked at me. I was stunned, angry, and confused all at once. I couldn't think of anything to say, so I did the only thing I could.

Trevor: I need to go.

Cindy: Wait, Trevor...

Vanessa: Baby, don't...

But I wasn't gonna stop. I threw a 20 on the bar to pay for the drinks and left, leaving no uncertainty that I didn't want either of them to follow me. I walked straight to my apartment and bolted and chained the door, remembering that Vanessa had a key.

I couldn't believe it! Vanessa and Cindy going after each other like that! Then Cindy dropping the bomb that she wanted me back!

I just sat on the couch and thought. What the fuck was I gonna do?! I had one girl who I was in love with, but didn't respect me, trust me, or could be honest with me; and another who broke my heart, but was now trying to win me back, knowing I was still in relationship.

My head hurt. I think I'll just go to bed, try to make some sense of this in the morning.

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

As soon as Trevor left, I wanted to grab the nearest knife I could and cut the bitch six ways to Sunday.

I finally had him! He was ready! He saw a life behind the lying slut and then she had to come and fuck it all up!

Me: Are you happy now?!

Selfish Cunt: How is this my fault?! You're the skank that's trying to steal my man!

Me: You lost him when you decided to be a lying ho bag. Don't blame me because you couldn't keep your taco from the plate!

Whoreish Jizzbucket: I never cheated on Trevor unlike your skanky ass! How many people did you flaunt that pack of deli meat you call a cunt to in college after you already had the perfect guy?!

Me: At least I never cheated on him.

Shit-smearer: I never cheated on Trevor! I fooled around with Ross before we were exclusive. Yeah, I should've told him, especially knowing what your skanky ass did to him, but at least I didn't dump to spread my legs to every Tom, Dick, and Shelly that came along.

Me: You fuckin' cun...

Bar Manager: HEY!

We both stopped and looked up at the imposing man in front of us.

Bar Manager: If you two can't knock it off, keep it down, or better yet, shut up; I'm throwing you both out!

Me: Sorry...

Quieter whore: Sorry, sir. We'll keep it down.

Bar Manager: You better...

He walked away after that and we both just looked at each other quietly for a few minutes, neither of us saying a word. We sipped our drinks and just looked at each other.

Vanessa's Log Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

I knew we'd fucked up. We'd fucked up with Trevor, the bar guy, everyone. Me and the cunt just started at each other in silence for a while after he left.

I started at her eyes, hatred burning through me at the women who'd caused all this damage. Who admitted she was trying all along to steal Trevor away from me! I wanted to take her outside by her hair and rip her hair out!!

WHAT A BITCH!!!!

Then for some reason, I looked at my own actions. I'm the one that decided to have a fuck buddy while I was first going out with Trevor. I'm the one that saw him the night of Trevor and mine's first date. And I'm the one that told Ross not to tell Trevor.

She may have contributed to all the drama, but I laid the bed.

Me: Why are you trying to take my boyfriend away from me?

My tone was calm and measured. I didn't show anger, though I was angry. I needed answers before I could even think of approaching Trevor.

Waste of Blond Hair: Because a few years ago, I made the biggest mistake in my life and I never thought I'd be able to fix it.

Me: That explains you wanting to apologize to him. Not wanting to get him back.

Ho-Bag: Cause he's perfect!

That statement just held in the air for a bit. I had to concede the point. Trevor really was perfect. He was kind, vulnerable, open, warm, funny, and an absolute demon in the bedroom. That's why I want him for my husband.

Me: Yeah, he is. I know that and I've known that for a long time. You dated him for a fuck ton longer then I have. What was this? A learning curve?

Dumb Bitch: Because you we're fuckin' perfect in college? You stayed with the same person all through high school and college?

Me: No, but I didn't have Trevor.

Loose Twat: Yeah, and would you have realized how amazing he was if you hadn't had a chance to see what else was out there?

The stupid slut actually had a point. I'd been with plenty of guys before Trevor came into the picture and it definitely did show me how rare a guy he really was.

Me: Ok, I give you that one, but why fuck with our relationship? Why try and take his happiness away from him? Hadn't you already done enough to fuck with his head?

Lying Liar: I may have hurt him by breaking up with him, but at least I was upfront with him. I didn't hide things from him.

Me: Sure, you never fooled around with anyone else before you dumped him.

Whore: I never did! I was tempted a few times, maybe even considered it a few more, but Trevor was the only one I'd ever been with until we broke up.

I haven't the slightest idea why, but I actually believed her. She didn't start her train pulling until she let Trevor go. But I also realized that I had her now.

Me: So, you never cheated on Trevor and I know he didn't cheat on you, but now you want him to cheat on me with you? What would that make him?

Slutty Shit-heal: I don't want him to cheat on you. I want him to dump your disrespectful ass and get back with someone who loves and respects him.

Me: I respect him!

Anal Carbuncle: Really? You respect him so much; you couldn't tell him the truth about Ross? You let him hang around your former fuck boy, completely ignorant, making him look like an idiot, and causing all this in the first place?

Now I actually had to think. I knew I should've told him, but how could she say I didn't respect him?! I would've told him.

I would've.

Would I?

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

Now I knew I had her. She had no respect for the supposed "love of her life" and she had the balls to say I'm the reason her relationship is in the toilet. Time for the kill.

Me: What kind of marriage do you think you're gonna have when you treat him like a little boy who can't handle the "adult talk"?

Cheating Slut: I do not treat him like that! I just didn't want to hurt him.

Me: Great job...

Spoiled Skank: You're trying to destroy his chance at happiness. His chance away from your spread legs. This is all about you, you selfish bitch.

Me: Yeah, God forbid I try and save the only man I've ever loved from a relationship, let alone a marriage, with a woman HE CAN'T TRUST!

Bar Manager: Getting loud again...

I held up my hand to show I understood.

Me: I may have helped fire the gun, but the ammunition came from you. It's not my fault you lied to him. It's not my fault you fucked Ross after your first date. That's all on you.

It was quiet for a like thirty seconds before something really fuckin' weird happened.

The bitch started crying.

I just sat their uncomfortably, sipping my drink, while my nemesis was having a breakdown.

Crying Slut: You're right. Fuck you, you're right. I should've told him. I should've been honest with him. Why the fuck didn't I tell him?

She kept sniffling a bit before getting her shit together.

Recovering Whore: I'm gonna fix this. I'm gonna bare my heart to him and apologize. I'm gonna prey he forgives me and we move on.

Me: Yeah, right...

Shit Talking Skank: I am. I'm going to his place right now.

She stood up from the table quickly.

Fat Ass: And you're coming with me.

Me: What?!

Crazy Whore: You're coming with me. We're gonna lay it all out to him and let him decide what to do. Does he take back his loving girlfriend who made a mistake or the bitch who broke his heart to pieces so she could be a cumdump?