Back Around Again

Me: You're insane...

Fuck Stick: Scared?

I wasn't gonna shrink from this cunt. She wanted a battle, she was gonna get one. I got up.

Me: Ok, bitch...let's go!

Trevor's Journal Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

I was spinning.

I had no clue what to think or what to do.

My girlfriend lied to me. My ex, who'd started becoming a friend again, now was trying to get me back. How the hell did this happen?!

Everything was going so well. I had a good job, good friends, Vanessa.

Vanessa...

I thought she loved me. I thought she trusted me. She was gonna be my everything.

Just like Cindy was going to be...

Fuck, maybe it is me. Maybe I just put them all on a pedestal. I trusted Cindy all those years ago, until she pulled the rug out from under me. I trusted Vanessa, until I found out she boned Ross right after our first date.

I just need sleep... I need to clear my head and figure this all out.

The door?

Vanessa's Log Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

I knocked on his door, not wanting to use my key. I wanted him to let us in willingly. I dragged the whore with me, being sure that seeing the difference between us would clear any doubt from his mind. I knew he was in there and figured he'd after to answer the door.

Me: Baby? Please open the door, we wanna talk.

Blonde Loose Cunt: Come on, Trevor. Let us in.

We kept knocking, hoping he would open the door for us. It was a full two minutes before I heard the locks click open.

Trevor: What are you both doing here?

Me: We want to talk to you. Can we come in?

Stinky Snatch: Please, Trevor?

He just stood there for a few seconds thinking.

Trevor: Honestly, I need some time here. I've got a lot to think about, and I need to do that alone.

Me: Please, baby. Let us in.

Trevor: Vanessa, no. I'm sorry, but no. If you want, you can both come over tomorrow night and we can talk. But right now, I need to think. I need to process all the crap you two dumped on me. Be here at seven tomorrow night if you want, but please, give me space until then.

I was crestfallen, but the bitch spoke up first.

Basic Bitch: Ok, I understand. Try and sleep and think over everything. I'll come back at seven tomorrow so we can talk.

The cunt was trying to take the high road in all this, and I had no choice but to go along with it.

Me: Just know I love you so much and I can't wait to see you again tomorrow.

Trevor: Thank you. Goodnight.

With that he shut the door. I looked at anger at one of the root causes of all this and sneered at her.

Me: Hope you're happy.

Thieving Twat: Yeah, Vanessa. I'm ecstatic. Keep thinking this is all my fault and take no responsibility for yourself.

With that, we left. I came home and did a combination of crying and thinking. I was fully aware that I could lose Trevor tomorrow, the love of my life. I knew he was angry at me and confused about the evil bitch's confession. I just had to hope he came to his senses and sees the love I have for him.

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 1, 2014-cont

I came home and started thinking. I knew that tomorrow was make or break. Either I'd win him back, or I'd be banished from his life, probably forever.

I needed to be logical, but heartfelt. I needed to show my growth and be honest about why I broke up with him all those years ago. I needed to be vulnerable, but strong.

But mostly, I'll have to keep my shit together.

If I get into another shouting match with her, he'll probably just throw us both out and cut us both out. I needed to keep my anger in check.

Deep breaths. Try it out.

Vanessa...

Vanessa...

Vagina Breath!

FUCK!!

Trevor's Journal Entry-April 2, 2014

As I'm writing this, it's six o'clock. They'll be here in an hour.

I took a personal day at work, cause I knew I'd never be able to focus. Mostly I've been sleeping, snacking, and thinking.

I still had no idea what I was gonna do. I love Vanessa. I had loved Cindy. Both have hurt me and both want to be with me.

Do I really want to throw a year and half relationship out the window just cause my old girlfriend came back? Can I really ever trust Vanessa again, or am I gonna be wondering if she's out doing someone else? Would it be any better with Cindy?

I'm pouring myself a scotch and thinking this out some more...

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 2, 2014

I spent most of work thinking about tonight, ducking out an hour early so that I could get ready. My hair is perfect, makeup is spot on, my outfit is cute and sexy, but not trashy. I look in the mirror and I see a fierce woman who's gonna get her long-lost love back.

Wish me luck...

Vanessa's Log Entry-April 2, 2014

I went to work but can't think of a single thing I actually did today, everything turning my attention to tonight. I hit the shower as soon as I came home, ensuring that I looked as pretty and fuckable as possible.

I had to work with what I had. She has height, so I'm wearing heels. I knew I had her beat in the curves department, picking an outfit to show off my boobs and ass while minimizing my very slight tummy. I looked myself up and down, just thinking to myself there was no way that Trevor could pass up this hot piece of ass.

But, then again, Trevor's not like most. He's a true man who cares more about what someone has on the inside then the outside. Makes me wonder what he saw in that loose pussy whore he dated.

No way I'm losing him to her. I may lose Trevor but I'm not losing him to that skank.

Show time!

Trevor's Journal Entry-April 4, 2014

To be clear, this is going to be my best attempt to describe what happened. I know that it's a couple of days late, and maybe some minor details are different, but I think this will show accurately and fairly the events that happened that night.

It was seven on the dot when I heard the door being knocked on. I got up and walked to the door, taking note that my hand was shaking a bit. I opened the door and my jaw dropped.

Vanessa and Cindy were both there and looked dressed to the nines. They could be going to a five-star restaurant while I was in a hoodie and a pair of ratty jeans. Wordlessly, I invited them in, both kissing my cheek as they passed me by.

I directed them to the couch, offering them a drink or a snack if they wanted, which they both declined. I poured myself another scotch and sat in my easy chair, directly opposite of them. Both seemed like they were trying to exude sex and confidence, while neither was doing a great job of hiding the tension or the worry.

Me: OK, first of all, thank you both for coming.

Vanessa: Of course, baby (rubbing my leg as she said it).

Cindy: Thank you for letting us come in.

I knew that the first thing I had to do was lay down the law.

Me: Ok, first things first. No fighting. No badmouthing each other or fighting. And only the truth, agreed?

Cindy: Agreed.

Vanessa: No problem. Can I start?

Me: I'm gonna start.

I was trying to be firm and set the tone from the get-go. This was not gonna be like before where the two of them were just attacking each other and they all but treated me like a side piece.

It was my turn.

Me: I'm gonna talk and ask questions and you both will answer them, got it?

Both looked stunned but nodded, so I continued.

Me: First things first. I'm angry. I'm angry for a lot of reasons. Vanessa's thing, Cindy's admission, the fight, all of it. I've spent a lot of today trying to work my way through all of it and I have questions.

I took a deep breath but was actively trying to keep my cool.

Me: Vanessa, you slept with Ross after our first date, right?

Vanessa: Baby, I didn't mean to hurt you...

Me: Yes or no?

I was trying to sound forceful and sure of myself.

Vanessa:...yes...

Me: Was that the only time since we've been seeing each other?

Vanessa: Yes, absolutely, yes!

I looked at her and saw that she was telling the truth, knowing she'd have protested more or deflected if she wasn't. I breathed a sigh of relief at that and continued.

Me: Cindy, have you been trying to get me back the whole time we've been hanging out?

I looked at her and already knew the answer, just based on how much she was fidgeting.

Cindy: I've been trying to get you back since I graduated.

Vanessa gave a sneering look at her, but a look from me was enough to show that it wouldn't be wise for her to continue on that path.

Me: Did you ever cheat on me while we were together?

Cindy: No. But...

Me: But what?

Cindy: Right before we broke up...

Vanessa: You mean right before you dumped him...

Me: Vanessa, stop.

She quickly clamed up and I nodded for Cindy to resume.

Cindy: Right before, a guy at a party almost kissed me. I stopped him, but I wanted to kiss him too. That's when I realized that I had no experience with anything or anyone outside of you, and vice versa. That's why I thought we should separate so we could do a bit of exploring on our own.

I was about to counter, but Cindy stopped me.

Cindy: I know, I did it in the worst way possible and trust me, I kicked myself in the ass for years about it. I was so happy when I saw you that day and I thought I could finally fix what I'd done.

Trevor: And you thought sabotaging my relationship was the best way to make it up to me?

I noticed Cindy fidgeting in her seat when I said that and could see that she was struggling for an answer.

Cindy: I just wanted you back. I missed you so much. I loved you then and I love you now.

I let that sit in the air before I turned back toward Vanessa, seeing her squirming a bit from all of Cindy's admissions.

Me: Vanessa, why do you want to be with me?

Vanessa: Why wouldn't I?! You're smart, you're kind, you're supportive. And not to give you too much of a big head, you're an amazing lover. You're my rock and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

I knew from knowing her, that she meant what she said. But now I wanted to hear from both of them about each other.

Me: Cindy, why do you think you're a better option for me then Vanessa?

Cindy: I know you don't want us to bash each other, so I'm going to do my best not to do that. I think I'm the girl for you because I know you. I've known you for so long. I was a selfish, bitchy, shallow alpha girl before you came along. You brought me out of that and made me a complete and better person.

I was about to interrupt and say that she wasn't answering the question really, but she realized that herself and switched tacks.

Cindy: I know you've changed over the years and all that, so I'll focus on now. I respect you. I respect and love you enough to tell you the truth. I've admitted where I've fucked up in the past and why. I've grown and I know that finding someone like you isn't easy. I took you for granted, but it didn't take me long to realize how rare and precious that you are. I want us to be together so that I can show you all the love and appreciation you deserve. The love that I should've given you before. I want to be not only your woman, but a full partner with you.

I had to admit, Cindy made a good case. We'd been through so much back in the day, and I knew I'd always have a pull toward her. I then turned to Vanessa. She'd been so wonderful to me and so loving. Yeah, she'd been less than honest with me, but I wasn't sure that invalidated everything that was there before hand.

Me: Vanessa, knowing what I know now, why should I trust you again?

I could see at first that Vanessa was taken aback, if not offended by the question. Her face changed abruptly though, seeming to know I was no mood to hear her irritation at the moment. She took a deep breath and began.

Vanessa: I know you won't believe me, but I always planned to tell you eventually about that night. I never meant to hurt you, but I shouldn't have kept it from you. In my mind, it didn't matter since we weren't exclusive yet. I need you to know that once we were exclusive, I've never so much as looked at another man.

Cindy: No, you just had Ross hang around all of you just in case.

Me: Cindy...!

I was trying to show that I wasn't gonna tolerate their shit talking. I nodded for Vanessa to continue.

Vanessa: Ross knew that I was with you and that wasn't gonna change. Neither of us wanted a relationship with each other, it was just to scratch an itch on occasion.

Me: Two things. One, if I asked Ross that question, is he gonna agree? Two, you didn't answer the question.

Vanessa again seemed to be battling her own nature, trying to give a full-throated defense, but again, she demurred.

Vanessa: You can ask him, but unless something changed with him, that was all it was. As for trust...

I saw her really reaching for an answer, like a part of her knew how much was at stake. She leaned over and looked straight at me.

Vanessa: I know I've fucked up. I know I damaged the trust we had before. And it will take time for it to come back fully. I'll do whatever it takes to get it fully back, but at the end of the day, you're the one that's gonna have to decide.

I blinked hard as Vanessa continued.

Vanessa: I want to marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to wake up every morning next to you and go to sleep every night the same way. But I know that love can't survive without trust. If you feel like you can never trust me again, as much as it will gut me, we should walk away.

It was honest, brutal, and gut wrenching. Now I was the one that needed to think. But Cindy beat me to it.

Cindy: Also, I don't wanna be just a runner-up to you. I want you to pick me, not wind up with me by default cause you and Vanessa break up. I love you and I want you to be mine, but not as a consolation prize.

I looked at both women and both looked serious as a heart attack. The tables were now turned and it was all on me.

Me: If that's the case, then can you both give me a few minutes to think about all this?

Vanessa: We'll wait outside.

Me: No, I'll go into the bedroom. Just give me a few minutes to think this all over.

Cindy: Do you want us to come back tomorrow?

Me: No, if I can't decide in a few minutes, I can't decide.

I got up and went to the bedroom, closing the door behind me and hoping that a homicide wouldn't occur in the living room while I wasn't there.

I felt drained, overwhelmed, and confused.

What did I really want?

Cindy's Diary Entry-April 4, 2014

Once Trevor left, we just sat there in awkward silence. We both knew the next few minutes could decide the rest of our lives and in very drastic ways. We just shuffled uncomfortably on the couch when she spoke.

Competition: I have to say, I admired what you said.

My head spun hard toward her, actually hearing something nice. I took a beat to let it really sink into me before I replied.

Me: I admired you were honest about trust.

We just sat there, pondering what the other was thinking. She broke the ice again.

Vanessa: This is the most unfeminist thing I've ever been a part of.

I giggled a bit at that before responding.

Me: We kinda deserve it though.

Vanessa: Oh, we totally deserve it, but it's still weird...

Me: Yeah...

We sat their pondering when I decided to speak up.

Me: Just so you know, if he chooses you, I won't blame him.

It was her turn to whip her head around in surprise, a shocked look on her face.

Vanessa: Same. I really fucked up.

Me: At least you didn't break his heart in college.

Vanessa: At least you didn't fuck a dude after your first date together. Fuck, am I stupid!

Me: Yeah, not the brightest move.

She seemed to know I wasn't really chiding her, not biting back at me. She just blew out a deep breath.

Vanessa: Remember when you told me that I didn't respect him? Maybe you were right. Maybe I took him for granted and figured he'd just stay no matter what.

Me: I probably was no better, thinking that he'd be ready to get back together after we explored other people.

Vanessa looked at me and sighed.

Vanessa: Are we pathetic? Just waiting her for a man to settle our fate?

Me: A bit. But we put ourselves here. We could've made better choices or just walked away from Trevor.

Vanessa: I don't wanna walk away from him and I know you don't.

Me: Yeah...

Vanessa: Sorry I called you all that shit.

Me: Sorry for everything I called you. I gotta be honest, you're a fox.

Vanessa: Thanks...

She had a smile on her face as she took the complement.

Me: Seriously. If I'd met you during my bi phase, I'd definitely taken a shot.

Vanessa: Thanks... Phase, huh?

Me: Yeah, you never played around with a girl?

Vanessa: Other than some kissing and a boob slap on occasion, not really.

Me: Well, take it from me, it can be really fun.

Vanessa: I bet. I thought about arranging for a threesome with Trevor as a gift, but I chickened out. Did you ever with...?

Me: No, but I wish I had. Might've saved me some pain.

Vanessa: It's not something he's ever brought up, but what guy...

Me: Exactly.

I then really looked at Vanessa. Despite the enmity and all the drama, there was no doubt she was hot as fuck.

Suddenly, I had a new idea...

Me: You know you really should try it sometime...

I scooted closer to her as I said it.

Vanessa: What? Be with a girl?

Me: Yeah. Girls know how to please other girls. Plain and simple.

Vanessa's Log Entry-April 4, 2014

I noticed that Cindy was moving closer to me. Instead of the hatred and loathing I'd normally feel, being that close to her, I had to admit, I was a bit wet.

Despite all the hell she'd put me through, I had to admit, she was sexy as fuck. Now that we were virtually in the same boat as far as Trevor was concerned, I started seeing her in a different light.

Me: What's the biggest difference?

Cindy: Well, girls are more sensual. Softer. And always ready to go.

Me: I guess that's true. Have you been with a lot of girls?

Cindy took a deep breath and I thought I'd gone too far.

Me: Sorry, I didn't mean...

Cindy: No, it's cool. More than a few. I still prefer guys, but women are sexy as hell.

Me: I'm sure you had no trouble picking them up.

Cindy: Not too much trouble. To be fair, it was all in college so it wasn't that difficult anyway.

Me: Finally being modest? Come on, you know you're hot.

Cindy: You're one to talk...

I don't know what was coming over me, but suddenly I was seeing my rival in a whole new light. Maybe I was just frustrated or just plain horny, but I pushed further.

Me: So, would you have taken a run at me back then?

Cindy scooted a bit closer to me before she answered.

Cindy: Would you have let me?

I could smell her from where she was, almost like I could smell her cunt radiating her desire.

Me: Maybe...

We were now very close to each other. She inched closer and closer to me and I made no move to back off or retreat. I let her press her lips to mine.

Suddenly, it was my kitty that was getting wet as Cindy and I started a tongue battle. She put her hand on the back of my head and I pulled her closer.

Trevor's Journal Entry-April 4, 2014-cont

I'd finally made up my mind. I knew exactly what I was gonna do. I knew the other was gonna be disappointed, but I felt it was the right choice. I took a long look at myself in the mirror I have in the bedroom and strengthened my resolve.

This was it.

I took a deep breath before I opened the door and walked out.

I started to talk, but for the life of me, I don't remember what I was gonna say, because the sight in front of me was mind blowing.

These women, these two women who 15 minutes before hand had been ready to tear each other apart, were making out on my couch. Hot and heavy with Cindy and Vanessa's hands exploring each other's bodies as their tongues were glued together it seemed like.