Breaking Out of a Sexual Rut - Pt. 01

While to all outward appearances we looked like a happily married couple, the hidden truth was that neither of us was sexually fulfilled with each other. It was more a case of mutual boredom than anything else. Don't get me wrong, we had a great start to our sex life. As the years went on, we reached a point where neither of us had felt sexually content for over a decade. We had fallen into the "married with kids" sex rut for well over a decade. We didn't plan on it happening this way, but it happened anyway. Slowly, gradually and without either of us noticing it.

The next thing I knew we suddenly stopped discussing sex at all. In our 20s, we always communicated about everything sexual. We were eager and willing to explore and expand our sexual repertoire. Then, bit by bit, things got more and more rote. Sex became less and less frequent. It was almost as if we had sex only because that's what married couples were supposed to do and not because we desired it. When we would "do the chore" it was usually once every 4-6 weeks.

I convinced myself that this is what happens to all couples in their 40s. I used to sit at work and get hard-ons thinking about my wife's body and what we were going to do in bed that night. But by this time, I was a middle-aged guy with a respectable career, mortgage, car payments and PTA meetings. I'm too old to have sex on my mind all the time, right? After all, you can't be 20 forever, right? My days of being able to fuck and cum 3-4 times a night were over, right?

Our sex life turned into once a month, usually on a Saturday or Sunday morning. While we were still lying in bed one of us would shoot the other a look as if to say "OK, let's get this out of the way." It was the same ole same ole. I would always leave my PJ top on and she would hike up her sleeping gown and lose the panties but keep her top covered. Our idea of variety in those days was that once or twice a year she would get on top and ride me. Hardly any kissing, foreplay or oral sex. No expressions of pleasure. We said nothing to each other as it was happening. Within 5 minutes from the time I took my PJ bottoms off, we were dressing again and casually discussing the errands we had to do later in the day. It was as if the sex we just had never happened. No cuddling, no compliments, no nothing.

I noticed but didn't really care that I'd always shoot really quick during those days. Usually, it was a minute at most and often less than that since we only did it once a month. Soon our dry spells were longer than that. Once one of our dry spells lasted 3 months. Even though I always had an orgasm, it never felt like a good release. Kind of like jacking off. During those 10 + years I don't ever recall her having an orgasm. In all honesty, I can't say it bothered me. I just chalked that up to her age and "the change."

Not that we weren't in love because we were, and still are, each other's best friends. We would go to shows or go out to dinner but that was it. As the saying goes, good sex will never save a bad relationship, but bad sex can undo a good one. That's what was happening to us. Not a good place to be.

We had always been open with each other. I told her I had bi experiences before we got married and she was fine with it as long as I didn't cheat with men or women. She also was impressed that I was honest with her because as we know, most men would never admit having sex with another guy and those experiences and longings would remain buried in the closet for the rest of their life.

It amazes me how many married bi guys there are out there. They too stopped having sex with their wives and now only have sex with other guys. They typically started in high school or college but thought they'd "grow out of it" when they got married. They were all scared to death to tell their wives because all of them were certain their wives would divorce them or worse, out them to their friends and families. Being sexually unfulfilled they would eventually go online looking to either give or get a bj with other married guys. I know because I was one of them.

On the other hand, she is very straight and, until we hit the rut, had a very healthy sexual appetite. She was almost always the aggressor when it came to sex. She loved to let me know when she was horny. When we were alone, she'd come out and say it. In public she would whisper in my ear that she was going to suck my cock when we got home or that she needed my tongue in her pussy and I better be ready to do it. I was so turned on and complimented by it that I often made an impromptu excuse about having to leave and get home. To top it off, she was always a very verbal and vocal lover. That is until we settled into the upper middle class suburban married with kids routine.

As sex became less frequent and satisfying, I must admit I had a few affairs. Some were virtual and online, some were in person the old fashioned way. Most were with women but some were with men. She claimed she never cheated on me, but I have my doubts. If she did, I couldn't blame her. I had turned into such a lousy lover. Still, I was unhappy and guilt racked that I was sneaking around and lying to her.

Then one Saturday night when we were alone because the kids were gone away for the weekend, we split a bottle of good red wine. We talked about how happy we were for the kids and what a great job we did raising good kids while we each balanced family and demanding careers. I thought it would be a typical Saturday night; watch a movie, go to bed and pass out and maybe screw in the morning. It seemed that's all we did on Saturday nights anymore. After the red wine was finished I cracked open a bottle of well chilled champagne and our conversation meandered from topic to topic.

Eventually it focused on us as a couple soon to be empty nesters since our kids were on the verge of moving out. I said maybe we can get a second wind and "kick up our heels" and travel or do something fun. I could tell something was on her mind, but she just couldn't say it. I could tell something was bothering her and she was doing her best to suppress telling me it. The after our second glass when she was obviously drunk she just blurted out:

"How come we don't have sex like we used to?"

We had great sex back in the early days. Even though I don't have the biggest cock in the world, she loved riding and especially sucking it. In those days she had a "rule." Her "rule" was never to cum in her mouth and when I pulled it out and came, never get it in her hair. She told me that the BJ's would stop if I ever did any of these things, and I never did. When you have a wife who loves sucking your cock (a lot stop doing it after a year or so) you don't do anything to fuck it up. There are too many guys out there who I've met whose wives either never once sucked their cock or they did in the beginning of the relationship and then just stopped after a couple of years.

Anyway, I had no idea she felt this way or was even thinking about sex anymore. I asked her to explain herself. She elaborated and told me she was not satisfied with the frequency and the quality of sex we had. I had no idea she was as unfulfilled as I. Being a guy with a male ego I just had to ask if she became sexually frustrated because she got tired of my small 4.5-inch cock. I have always been self-conscious about it ever since I started showering with guys after gym in high school. I couldn't help but notice that almost every guy had a bigger cock.

But that wasn't it.

"No honey, you know how to use what you got. That's not the problem. I think you've become bored with me because I no longer have the body I did when I was 30."

That certainly wasn't the issue for me. I mean who in their 50's still looks like they did in their 30's? I'm still 6'1 and put on 40 lbs. She's still 5'11 and was now a size 16. She was either a 10 or 12 when I met her.

I then told her what I had been feeling for years.

"You know and let's be honest, we have become bored with each other sexually. It's become routine and boring just like cleaning the house."

I could see this hit home with her. She had tears in her eyes. She was hurt by my words and I knew it. Then she laid a big one on me.

"You're right I do think it's a chore. Do you know why? It's because you haven't made me cum in over 10 years."

I felt very insulted. I thought to myself, "what a fucking shitty thing to say."

To which I countered back, "that was the last time you sucked my cock. I stopped eating your pussy years ago because you never returned the favor. You lay there like a beached whale and hardly move."

She shot back with, "I don't have the time to move because you cum in 30 seconds."

So after a few "fuck you" comments and a "yeah maybe if I had a guy with a bigger cock" comments we decided to take a break and let calmer heads prevail before we hurt each other any further. We slept in separate bedrooms that night.

So we waited a few days and talked again.

During the cooling off period I reflected back the very hot sex life we had. We used to joke that married people are not supposed to be this horny. We would suck, fuck and lick 2-3 times a week. But then, over a decade, things got stale and we started to drift apart. It happens when job and family responsibilities get in the way.

A few days later when we were sober, we said we loved each other and that we owe it to each other to try to spice things up again. I read up on how to reignite the passion on one of those endless and repetitive internet sites. I signed up for a few porn sites to get some ideas. I wanted her to watch with me.

I even ordered her an egg shaped vibrator though I had no idea how she'd react. I was half afraid she'd get insulted and throw the thing in the garbage. I was also worried she'd tell me there was no way she'd watch porn again (we did when we were first married). Boy was I wrong!

Our first-time watching porn together was interesting. I popped a Cialis even though I didn't know if I would have the chance to feel the effects. At first, she said porn no longer did anything for her but she couldn't take her eyes off of the computer once I logged into the site. I noticed that she couldn't keep her eyes off the younger, in shape guys.

As she sat next me on the couch we watched a good 30 minute video with a younger guy and an older woman. The premise was that the woman was cheating on her husband. Her eyes were fixed on the young guy while I was getting hard looking at the woman's ass and getting turned on by her dirty talking. I poured us some more wine and put my arm around her. She leaned into me.

My hands slowly made their way to her 42 D cups. To my surprise and pleasure, her nipples were as hard as rocks. She smiled, rolled her eyes and breathed heavier as I gently played with them. I went to kiss her neck and kissed down to her open low cut tight shirt but she could not take her eyes off the cut in-shape 20 something guys. I wanted to chuckle to myself because she sounded so put off by the idea of watching porn, but I didn't dare say anything to get her out of the mood.

She then reached over and started rubbing my modest but very stiff cock.

"Lose the pants," she all but ordered me.

I hadn't heard words like that in 10 plus years. My heart quickened as I thought "who is this woman?" and "man I am one lucky guy" and finally "why didn't I bring this out of her earlier?"

I was too horny to feel the angst.

So I pulled out my hard dick and as soon as I sat back down her head was in my lap licking the swollen head and working her mouth all up and down the tip. All the while cupping my balls. I was lost in pleasure and she knew it. I was about to orgasm and she knew it so she stopped. She started making out with me and I started unbuttoning her shirt. She took off her bra and I started playing with those lovely globes that I had barely touched over the past 10 years.

As I fondled and kissed and sucked her nipples my hands found my way to her inner thighs. I lightly rubbed them as I as fondling her breasts with rock hard nipples. I started very gently and slowly running my tongue all over them. She panted and looked at me with a look I can't remember seeing and in a breathy voice said, "Let's see if you remember how to eat pussy."

I was floored. She hadn't come out and asked for oral sex in years. Many years in fact. The way she asked shocked me, and I didn't have to be asked twice.

I undid her pants button and she did the rest for me. Within no time, her pants were off and to my delight she shaved her pussy for me. She knows I loved it when she used to do this for me. I was on my knees in front of her while she was still watching the young guys in the video.

I knelt on the floor, by the couch and kissed her pussy. I was amazed by how much I missed the taste and smell of it. Her pussy was sooo hot and sooo wet. My lips and tongue ran all over the outer lips. My tongue flickered in and out of her. I kept kissing and licking her clit. I was so lost in pleasing her I almost forgot how hard my cock was. After a good 5-10 minutes I was so tuned on I was panting and damn near out of breath when finally, I said to her "honey get on top of me and lets 69 like we used to."

We didn't walk to the bedroom, we ran! When she hopped into bed, I remembered the toy I bought her. I was nervous as I lubed up the egg as I was going to apply it to her clit. I still was nervous about how she'd react.

As soon as that egg hit her clit she quickly arched her hips up as she let out a moan. It turns out I had nothing to worry about. I would later find out she secretly had one of her own and would give herself orgasms with it when I was out of the house.

Her moans got louder as I cupped her ass cheeks with one hand and worked the vibe all around her pussy with the other while my tongue darted in and out of her pussy. She started caressing her breasts and moaning louder. She knows that a huge turn on for me is to see her play with her titties. Finally she had an intense orgasm; probably her first in years. She let out a long low grunt at first that only got louder and louder. I had never heard her yell like that before.

I remembered her rule about getting a BJ and somehow, I held off as she sucked my cock. I damn near passed out from pleasure as she cupped my balls and breathed with her hot breath on my cock. All the time she was whispering in between moans as I was licking her pussy.

"Perfect size for sucking." She always knew the right thing to say.

She took it all in her mouth and bobbed from tip to base until I had to tell her to stop because I was going to cum. That was the first time she had my entire cock in her mouth in at least 10 years. After her 2nd orgasm, she opened up a bit more and got a bit bolder.

She confessed to me a secret desire of hers was to watch me jack off. She had always wanted to ask me but was afraid of what I might think of her. I told her never to think like that again and of course I would love to do that for her. So I told her to ride my face so she can watch me jack off.

So she climbed on my face and turned around so that she was facing my feet. I was staring right into her ass as she took the vibe and started doing herself with it. I breathed into her ass crack as I started to jack off. As she wiggled on my face I could hear and feel her moaning and grunting again so I started to jack even faster and started cupping my balls with my other hand. After a good minute or two I was shooting frozen ropes of cum that got all over my tummy.

After I cleaned myself up, she curled next to me and purred into my ear, "I missed us. I am so glad we're back."

I don't think I came that hard in my life. My balls were drained. Even though we didn't actually fuck that night I was more than satisfied as I thought to myself, "things are about to change for the better."