All Comments on 'Chloe and Zoe on the Subway'

I’m sure a lot of people are into this, and it’s not a bad story, but I feel the story needs some trigger warnings. This is pretty much just rape, not really free-use. I wasn’t triggered, but I only like consensual stuff. (And for anyone who thinks Chloe orgasming makes it ok; it doesn’t. Many rape survivors have cum during their attacks, it’s purely the physical stimulation)

i agree with anonymous. this story was very well written with no grammatical errors in sight, but it

definitely needs a ton of trigger warnings mainly because it’s sex trafficking and rape.

Thanks for the feedback. This is my first submission so I’m not as clear on the boundaries of each category and I debated whether to submit this under Group Sex or Nonconsent/Reluctance. I’ve submitted an edit with a warning note at the top but would it make more sense to switch the category?

This is definitely clear and free of major spelling and grammatical mistakes, but i agree with the others. It needs to be better flagged for trigger warnings and should be moved to non-consent as the group sex is not as prevalent in the story as the non consent is.

Amazing work. This kind of writing style and attention to detail is so hard to find, but in my opinion is above most other forms of erotic writing. It isn't just sexy (although it is incredibly so), but it is also just grammatically fun to read. Great work an look forward to seeing more from you!

Amazing story!! Absolutely loveddd it. Agree with the non con comment, would have loved it even more if I knew to prepare myself for this genre.

the story was so so so good though, I think I have found an author I will keep checking regularly on for new work. Absolutely amazing!!

I keep coming back to this story, please write more!

I love stories where the girl gets relentlessly used without protection. I don't want to see her get pregnant, it's the riskiness of the behavior. It might have been better to have separate stories showing how she earned her nickname or the time she was a greeter, but I enjoyed it the way it is.

An explanation for her gulibility would be nice. Maybe the Plan B she uses is an experimental version that was pushed through testing in spite of some 'unproven' reports that frequent use of it has detrimental effects to critical thinking and raises libido. There was mention of possible brain damage from oxygen deprivation, though.

I like the idea that Zoe's having fun pushing her as far as she can. Maybe she'll get rid of any clothes that aren't revealing enough and she'll start documenting Chloe's humiliations, telling her that she's doing it to protect her so that the men can't accuse her (Chloe) of raping them. She might even insist that Chloe should pay any guy that fucks her as 'hush money'.

Chloe could be pushed into prostitution (cheap rates) or into signing a long-term anything goes contract with a bottom of the barrel pornographer under some guise or another, like they're Sociology or journalist students and Zoe explains that they're doing an expose. Naturally all money, little as it is, goes to Zoe while Chloe is forced to take out debts to cover all costs

Final thought, Zoe uses Chloe's holes for smuggling larger and larger items. Probably nothing illegal. She has to shoplift a ton of things in one go by shoving them inside until she's stretched so much she looks pregnant. Unfortunately the security tags might not have been removed but on the plus side Zoe knows the security guard and makes an arrangement with him.

No option to edit comments? Oh well. Another idea: Chloe gets Zoe a choker with a lock on it. Maybe the key she has 'doesn't work' or breaks in the lock. It's a little too tight and cuts off a bit of air. Worse, it has her nickname 'Cum Dump' on it in big letters. Fortunately Zoe points out that the name is just another layer of leather that she can fold up inside the collar between the collar and her neck. This makes the collar even tighter and when it's tucked firmly under the collar they realise there's more wording on the collar. Something like 'Heart Cum" or 'Slut' or Gang Bang me hard or some such.

Zoe could convince Chloe to get some tattoos. They're supposed to be temporary but there's a 'miscommunication with the artist and she winds up with all sorts of derogatory words on her body.

Thanks for the feedback and ideas! It's cool to see people are enjoying it! I'm not sure how long it will take me but I am working on a follow-up.

I hope we'll see more of this, it's one of my favorites. Another suggestion: Zoe encounters a rogue academic who wants to stress-test a woman's ability to take multiple dicks simultaneously. Naturally, she volunteers Chloe (and pockets any payment for services rendered).

I literally stumbled across this read. As far as a written short, storyline, grammar, etc. all are on point. And this might be funny to many after reading the comments, but I didn't know what I was reading about, not into this type of erotica, but the writing was good enough to hook my curiosity that I couldn't stop lol. I THOUGHT I had an adventurous side. Nope. Not after reading this. I'm pretty vanilla lol. Not my cup of tea but still couldn't stop reading.... You're good. Keep writing!!

Where’s the follow up chapter my boy. This is some good stuff. The people need the update chapter. We want to see Chloe’s naive self get into as many dick-possible situations as she can. Maybe the possibility of earning a new nickname. Chloe Cocksleeve? Chloe Spermbank? Chloe Urinal? The possibilities are as endless as the semen she’s reluctant to receive.

Excellent work! Would love to see other stories from this pair.

It’s been over a year, I need chapter 2!

Shout out the dummy from 3 days ago getting math wrong. It’s been just under a year. Regardless, I agree with him that WE NEED A CHAPTER TWO. CMON MAN THIS IS AMAZING. I love how nonchalant Chloe is about all this. She just resigns herself to her fate every time. Post more!

Over a year. It was originally put in freeuse and then reposted to noncon (where it belongs) like a month later

well written. There are some great themes in this story. I hope you decide to write a part 3

More please

Your stories make me want more. I hope you keep writing