Closet Opened Ch. 10

Five minutes till the alarm was set. I hated laying in bed wide awake. Doing it since four in the morning was no picnic. When I woke up, every question immediately popped into my head.

Do I transition? The question itself wasn't difficult. Hell yes! I wanted too but change is hard. I had my life in a good place with career, friends, family and even marriage. I worked hard at all of it. Transitioning however would be a curveball to everyone, Tricia too. I don't think she fully appreciated how extreme it might be. My mom would come around but dad may never speak to me again. What I am suppose to do? Wait another twenty years after they've passed? Wasn't this my life to lead? I also figured we'd lose half of our friends specially those who were also coworkers. Some of those coworkers were assholes anyways and wouldn't be missed.

How far to transition? Again, not too difficult a question. I wanted to keep my penis and that was that. What about my testicles? Would their removal help since they produced testosterone? Tricia and I had talked about kids but neither of us were over the top excited about raising them. If I went that far, have to find a place to preserve some semen just in case. Hair would grow back and shaving was a bit of pain at times. Sculpting my eyebrows didn't seem extreme though electrolysis may prevent them from coming back at least fully. Nothing too terrible really.

What will it do to my marriage? Okay, I hadn't been totally honest with Tricia for years about my activities but I certainly didn't put hormones in her food! What made her go from old to the new Tricia that not only embraced my activities but egged them on? You'd think I would have had that conversation with her by now but we always seemed to have something we were doing or planning. Time flies when you're having fun and I lost track of it.

What will Tricia do while I'm at Steven's beck and call for two years? She could continue working if she wanted. Certainly she could use some of my allowance and through that have more freedom. Would we keep our house or sell it and she move up to Seattle? Had she told me everything she and Steven had discussed? Was he going to take care of her as well?

What will I do while I'm at Steven's beck and call? Of course I'd be more than an experiment. Fuck puppet might be a better title. Could I put that on a resume or in my LinkedIn profile? LOL! Actually, that's no joke as a two year hiatus from work doesn't look good on a resume and when Steven is done with me I'd have to find employment again. I could use the money to do back to school for another degree though and that could be explanation enough for any future employer.

How dangerous were Steven's methods? Sounded like it was more than just some chemicals he cooked up in a crock pot. My mind went to all sorts of crazy places including a memory of movie The Fly which made me laugh and skin crawl at the same time. Only after a long conversation with Steven would I really be able to let this one play a role in my decision making process.

I finally turned off the alarm and got out of bed. Closing the bedroom door quietly behind me I made my way over to the coffee maker. I waited in silence as my cup brewed looking out over the city. Added a sweetener packet and took my first sip.

This was crazy! Was I crazy for considering his offer? Was I crazy for thinking I'd pass up the opportunity?

That word hit me like a bolt of lightning: opportunity. I wasn't thinking of it as an offer anymore but a way to change my life for the better! That's what opportunities were, right? Resetting all thoughts, I needed to be honest with myself. Weigh all questions then ask myself, where was my head regarding an opportunity? I'd have to say at least sixty maybe seventy percent in favor but largely due to whatever Steven had created. Nobody could see into the future and stepping through any door had unknowns and risks.

I am crazy. I wanted it. I think.

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Tricia and I were quiet as we went through our morning routines. We repacked a smaller suitcase for the weekend complete with all of our clothings and any other goodies we thought would be necessary. Watching buildings go by from the back seat of our ride share holding hands with Tricia, I thought about breakfast. It was a light one but couldn't remember what it was. So many other things running through my head.

It was a pleasant drive. Heading north by northwest out of the city, the driver took us on a route near the shore. Between the trees we could see Elliot Bay and all the early sail boats lazily tacking with the light wind. I lost track of where we were. At some point we turning inland, uphill and into a cul-de-sac. The ride took forever but seemed so brief at the same time. Butterflies began fluttering and threatened to escape my stomach.

Tricia took care of the driver while I pulled the suitcase out of the trunk. Before us was a large, contemporary home. Though I knew home prices were probably out of control in the area, if Steven were as well off as he said he was living quite modestly. Steven appeared at the door before we had rung bell. If possible, he must be as anxious as I.

"Good morning and welcome. Let me take your bag. Come in. I have some breads, fruits, juices and coffee for you both." He deep voice sent shivers down my spine.

He led us through the house, past the kitchen and to the main living area. Large, expansive windows opened to a cleared lot to a perfect view of the bay below. It was breath taking.

"This is incredible!" Tricia said as she ran to the window. "What an incredible find!"

"It wasn't always this way. The green you see use to be another house. When it came on the market, I immediately bought it and had it removed. I knew the view would be good but when the last of the former structure came down and a few trees were removed, yes, even I was taken aback. Please, help yourselves to the food. I'd hate for it to go to waste."

We each fixed a plate and sat taking in the view. There was light talk about last night, general questions regarding my recent win at work but the elephant in the room was beginning to suffocate us. Steven addressed it for us.

"Tricia has relayed some of what I offer, yes?" I nodded. "I'm sure you both have many, many questions. Allow me to describe. Perhaps that will help."

"I have a degrees in biochemistry, physiology and pharmaceutical science. Over the years of my career, I have worked on innumerable projects to benefit others with genetic conditions. My love for the, shall we say, kinky science has always been present and with today's near acceptance of transgendered peoples I think the time has come to help them as well."

"The human body is more pliable than we give it credit but to accomplish certain outcomes it has to be trained whether the purpose is burning fat or adding muscle. Skin is the forgotten organ and left to cosmetic companies to cover imperfections. What was always in my mind, how could the body grow where it normally does not? One reason, skin is restrictive. It's a protective shield but also holds things back. So, what if it could be stretched and encouraged to grow? You've seen Natural Geographic pictures of people with ear lobes big enough for a grapefruit to go through them? Takes years to stretch but their lobes do stretch."

"My process is two part. First is a special cream I developed that is absorbed rapidly to soften and encourage growth. It would fall into the anabolic steroid camp but it is designed to stay in the skin and not be absorbed internally that way we avoid heart issues and all the other usual problems."

"Second part requires filling behind the new skin. Has to be done else you'd have very saggy breasts. Large vacuum cups are placed on each side and slowly pull the skin out. That area it left as is would fill with blood and water, eventually dehydrate and there you are left with saggy breasts again. So, I asked a friend about it and he sent me on a path chasing what's called 'living silicone'. Injected into this area it quickly takes on the form of the space, in this case, your breasts the size of the cups. It can expand so if you want D size then we go with C cups. This is a picture of the first person who volunteered. I wasn't certain and he/she wanted to make sure they were big. I put the D cups on and, well, you see the results. Had to special order bras for a while till I could get him lined up with a clinic to reduce them.

"Living silicone is safe and won't travel anywhere in your body but the extraordinary thing is blood vessels and even nerves eventually start to form throughout. End result? Two very perfect and natural looking breasts."

The before and after pictures in front of me were amazing! What he had done was nothing short of a miracle. Development of breasts for the male body that looked as natural as if they had grown naturally.

The doorbell rang. "Excuse me." Steven got up to answer.

Sitting there on the couch at Steven's home with Tricia was surreal. He had left to answer someone at the door which we looked over his past "subjects". Or would experiments be a more apt term? Guinea pig? What was I?

Tricia asked a bit excitedly, "What do you think? They look so normal! And this one must have had more work done because he, er, she looks like a real 30 year old woman! I bet you'd look hotter though" topping that statement off with a smile. Steven returned and stood in the entry to where we were sitting.

"I have a little surprise for you. Meet Emily." He stepped to the side revealing a long legged, toned, tanned, long raven dark haired woman. She had to be close to six foot tall, lean and breasts that practically sprang from her chest. Her dress revealed just enough cleavage and didn't fit the time of day but certainly fit her body. She wore it splendidly. It was white, sleeveless, slight shimmer to it and ended about mid thigh. Her shoulders held the dress straps well barely covered them and her lithe, slim but toned arms at her side echoed duteous gym routine but not overdone. On her feet were matching white, open toed heels with straps going up over her ankles. She was a goddess.

"Hello" she said and approached us extending her hand and shaking each of ours. "I was one of Steven's firsts. Obviously I have had more work done but no complaints and wouldn't have changed a thing. I assist Steven now to make sure he doesn't get too carried away." She winked towards him. "I understand if you have questions. Please ask me anything."

Tricia did not hesitate and started firing away before any sound escaped my lips. What has been done since? Any follow up procedures needed by Steven? Any health issues after? She went on and on. Every answer was positive. A silence hung for a bit as they anticipated more questions. Emily was starring at me nearly the entire time she was answering Tricia. Was she sizing me up? What was she looking for? She finally broke the silence.

"I see you. More than just your bone structure, height, weight, and everything else. You see yourself as having slightly longer than shoulder length auburn hair? Not petite but not unusually tall either? Maybe a slight tan but not overly done. I see you as I think you see yourself." She shifted to face our host. "I understand your interest in her Steven. She could become your best ever."

Silence again. Concerns regarding the procedure fell to the side. I was left with only my own questions. Questions only I could answer. Should I? Should I now? What will become of my career, life, relationships and most importantly Tricia? Tricia seemed onboard. My career could be rebooted. I had a solid track record and years of experience. If my current employer and coworkers couldn't deal with it easily I'd find other employment. Certainly life altering but not terribly given our recent fun times. I'd need a whole new wardrobe but Tricia was a shopper. She'd get a kick out of helping me. That left me with my personal relationships, specifically with my parents. I felt such a weight on my chest.

Looking up and around to everyone. They were all staring at me. I had to get fresh air. Stood, excused myself and walked out to the deck overlooking the bay. Tricia stood to follow but I heard Emily behind me quickly and calmly tell her to let me be with my thoughts.

Outside, I fished my cell out from my front pocket, unlocked and found my parents number under contacts. My thumb hovered above dial frozen. I was having trouble finding the will to close the centimeters distance between thumb and phone. That is when heard my dad's voice in my head saying one of his life teaching phrases, "If it's important you do it." That was followed by, "If you're going to do it, do it right." My thumb lowered dialing. As it rung in my ear, all personal questions were answered with one simple realization: this was important to me.

My mom answered. After a brief hello I heard her yell for my dad to pick up the phone. We talked general stuff initially while I found the nerve to bring them up to date on me. Describing where I was first (of course mom wanted a picture) but then shifted to why I was standing here. As I was relaying what was going on to mom and dad, I could feel three sets of eyes on me from inside the house and turned to face Tricia, Steven and Emily. Emily had a knowing look. One of empathy having once been in my shoes. Steven smiled slightly but staring intently as if trying to grant me all his confidence and will power to make it through my conversation. Tricia had tears running down her face. She knew with who I was speaking. From these three, I found what was needed to finish what I had to say.

Silence on the phone. Forever I will remember this day for the times of silence. Mom started with her usual "I don't understand" type statements. I assured her it was what I wanted. For the next fifteen minutes I answered all of her questions ranging from me giving her grandchildren, Tricia's thoughts on it, to my career, and everything in between.

When dad spoke, he did softly. "Is this important to you?" Yes, and to Tricia. "Then you know what needs to be done." I couldn't help but smile as I cried. Tricia immediately came to me wrapping her arms around me as I wrapped up with my parents.