Completely, Enthusiastically, & Without Question - Pt. 01

After a bit of coaxing from the group, Olivia did end up participating in the fun. She and Jess were tied with Bailey and Max, each pair with three wins each after six rounds of the Capture the Flag card game.

This particular round had been going for what felt like forever. Every time Max got close to winning, Olivia drew the perfect card to block them, followed by several more perfect cards to set them back a bit. And every time she was close to winning, they drew a perfect card. And round and round it went.

"Olivia, don't you dare lose this," Jess told her.

"Stop distracting me," Olivia shot back, dropping a card in the process.

"Oh, good idea," Jess replied. "Hey, Max, did you know that my lovely roommate, Olivia, once made out with more than twenty people in a single night?"

"What?" Max asked, not distracted from the game at all.

"It was my twenty-first birthday!" Olivia exclaimed in her defense. "I kissed twenty-one people - none of whom were complete strangers, by the way. And one of whom was you, Jess."

"You're going to have to do better than that to distract me," Max bragged.

The game continued back and forth, the mess of cards on either side spilling onto the floor. There were only a handful of cards left in the deck and they'd already reshuffled the deck once that round. Olivia was honestly getting tired of playing, but Jess - her wonderful best friend and roommate, Jess - had bet not just one brunch, but two brunches on the game. Olivia had study materials to pay for, she couldn't afford that nonsense.

"Oh my god, just end this damn game," Jess lamented. "Here," she said as she pulled her shirt up to flash Max to distract them, flashing both Bailey and Olivia in the process. All three stopped what they were doing.

"Olivia!" Jess yelled as she covered herself. "That was supposed to distract Max, who has never seen my tits. You've seen them a hundred times!"

"Your boobs don't just get less attractive because I've seen them a bunch of times," Olivia said, trying to defend herself. "Can we just end this game and call it a draw? You take us to brunch, then we take you to brunch?" she asked, directing the question at Max.

"Oh, thank god," Max said, slumping their shoulders dramatically. "Yes, please, I'm so tired of matching colors."

"What's next then?" Jess asked.

"Jess, it's ten o'clock, we should let our hosts kick us out." Olivia didn't want to overstay her welcome.

"No, it's okay, hang out for a bit. If you want," Bailey reassured them. "Max and I are just going to stay up for another two hours playing video games anyway."

Olivia raised an eyebrow at Max. "I thought you didn't usually stay up late."

"I don't usually stay out late. There's a difference," Max pointed out. "Also, I work from home Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays. And Fridays are only four hour days - I'm done at one o'clock. So Thursdays are usually late nights for us."

"What games do you play? Can we play?" Jess asked.

"Depends," Bailey said. "We play some first-person shooters but we also play Monopoly against the AI sometimes. We played a lot of Mario Kart during lockdowns with my cousins in Oregon. We're versatile."

"Good to know," Jess said, batting her eyes at Bailey. She was laying it on thick that night, all but outright screaming that she wanted to sleep with him.

"Well what would you be playing tonight if we weren't here?" Olivia asked.

Max looked at Bailey. "I don't know, probably Borderlands?" they asked.

Bailey nodded their head slowly from side to side. "Or Wonderlands?"

"Yeah, probably Wonderlands," Max confirmed.

"What's that? Can we all play?" Jess asked.

"There's a lot of backstory you need to know to really appreciate it, but it's like a fantasy first-person shooter that's based around this game that's effectively just Dungeons and Dragons," Max explained, beaming with excitement. "It's a spin-off of the Borderlands series, which is our favorite series, like, ever."

"And it's the gayest fucking game in the world!" Bailey called out from the kitchen.

"Oh, yeah, it's super queer. One of the main non-playable characters is non-binary. But it's super cool the way they wrote it." Max tucked one leg under the other and leaned towards Jess and Olivia as they spoke. "The character, Paladin Mike, is kind of like your guide through the game. They're a really important character and they're just casually non-binary.

"But, Paladin Mike is a character that another character from the Borderlands series uses when she plays the game, which is called Bunkers and Badasses, with Tiny Tina, who I'll explain in a minute because the game is literally Tiny Tina's Wonderlands," Max continued, their enthusiasm growing as they described the game to Olivia and Jess.

Max shook their head, appearing to snap themself back to their point. "But we know from Borderlands that Lorelei is kind of questioning her identity. She says something about wanting to be a man in Borderlands. We never know, or we don't know yet, if she ever transitions. Or if she identifies as non-binary. She could be non-binary and use she and her pronouns but the character she creates for the game uses they and them pronouns.

"So it gives this whole community of gender-diverse people with varying identities the space to fill in the blanks in a way that they can best identify. It's so cool. I fucking love it," Max said with a soft smile. They picked at the label of their beer bottle and shrugged. "I don't know of any other game like that. And that's just to start. There's a whole list of other ways that game is so important for trans and gender-diverse folx."

There are some moments that just seem to stand still. They freeze to let you take them in and imprint them in your mind. The importance of that game in Max's life was not overlooked by Olivia. They'd shared a vulnerable part of themself let her see something that not everyone got a chance to see. To say she was grateful would have been an understatement.

The group was silent for a long beat before Max spoke again. "But to answer your other question, yes, you can play. We each have two controllers. But we have to move the other TV out of my room to play all together. We play on separate consoles so we both get big screens."

"So you move your TV every time you play games?" Olivia asked. How ridiculous. But also, how adorable.

Bailey shook his head. "Not every time. Usually Max just plays in their room and we yell down the hall to each other."

"We put headphones on and call each other when it gets late," Max added. "We're not terrible neighbors."

"Give us, like, ten minutes. We've gotten really good at setting this up," Bailey said, ducking behind the TV to fuss with some wires.

Olivia couldn't shake the feeling that she was on a double date. And a very specific kind of double date. The kind that couples who have been together for years go on with their similarly long-term committed friends.

The lines were getting a little blurry.

Max

By the time Tuesday rolled around, Max had replayed the previous Thursday night over in their head at least fifteen times. Despite Bailey's insistence that he and Jess were just friends, the two sure had flirted a lot. They looked, talked, and acted like a couple that had been together for years.

When Max interrogated Bailey about it, he'd called them out for their hypocrisy. "Uhhh, 'pot, meet kettle' much?"

It was a fair call out. Max and Olivia were just friends but it sure had felt like more that night. Their impromptu game night had turned into what actually resembled a double date night. When the teams of roommates had to split to face each other one-on-one, Max and Olivia had been paired up to compete. When they played Wonderlands, it had been basically assumed that Olivia would play with Max while Jess played with Bailey.

It had been so much like a date night that Max almost expected Olivia to come with them when they retired to their room for the night. Almost.

Max understood their boundaries. They'd been through something similar before, when they and Bailey broke up and wanted to remain friends. It had been hard then, just as it was becoming difficult with Olivia. But if they could do it with Bailey, whom they'd legitimately been in a relationship and in love with for over a year, they could manage to build a healthy friendship with Olivia.

The group of four had a new group chat that was very active, pretty much all the time. If Max put their phone in their drawer to focus on work, they would likely find close to a hundred notifications when they got back to it. Some messages, some tapback emojis, but nearly all from the same group chat.

Olivia: Literally FUCK this day

Max: How does one *literally* fuck a period of time?

Olivia: I don't know, but I'm going to find out.

Jess: What's wrong, roomie?

Olivia: Lots of gym bros today. I've had to ask at least five people not to drop the weights. If they want crossfit, they should join a crossfit gym.

Olivia: I have nothing against crossfit. But people come here because it's NOT crossfit.

Jess: Want to grab a drink and blow off some steam after work?

Olivia: No. But thanks. I need a chill night.

Jess: Then should I grab you a bath bomb?

Olivia: Except we don't have a bathtub, dumbass. I'll settle for a heated blanket and a movie.

Bailey: We have a tub. I won't be home tonight, but I'm sure Max can handle filling a bathtub.

God damn it, Bailey. What was Max supposed to do? Sit in their living room with the knowledge that Olivia was naked just a handful of yards away? They switched to their text message with just Bailey.

Max: Wtf, dude? Wanna ask me before you go volunteering me for things?

Bailey: Like you had other plans...

Max: I might have.

Bailey: But you don't. And come on, Olivia is our friend and she had a shit day. There are edibles in my stash box, give her one. You can take one for yourself, for your effort.

Max: If you don't know by now that I take from your stash whenever I want, you need to keep better track of your drugs.

Max: Just know that you're not making it easy for me to get past the idea of dating Olivia.

Max flipped back to the group chat.

Max: I think I can manage it. What time?

Olivia: Seriously? You two are the fucking BEST. I owe you. BIG TIME.

Olivia: I need to stop home for a minute after work so... maybe 9:30?

Max: Ok, no problem.

Olivia: In exchange, I will make you dinner on Thursday.

Max: Deal.

Jess: Good work.

Olivia: Huh?

Jess: Wrong text. Sorry.

After work, Max spent more time than was probably necessary making sure the bathroom was spotless, then had to open the window to the frigid temperatures to air out the chemical smell. Olivia's opinion mattered to them and they wanted to impress her. Not to mention that baths were just more pleasant when surrounded by a sparkling clean environment.

"So the tub is almost full, but I haven't topped it off yet. We have a variety of bath salts, bath bombs, and bubble bath soaps if you're interested," Max explained, closing the door behind Olivia. "There's also a clean robe in there for you, if you need it."

"I hadn't pegged you two as the spa amenities types, but I'm grateful for it," Olivia said.

Max shrugged. "Relaxation is important in this household," they said as they reached the door to the bathroom. "Everything's all there for you. If you can't find something you need, let me know. Or just look for it, we have nothing to hide. Oh, and there's a tasty treat from Bailey in a little pill box on the counter. It's weed. If you're interested. Five milligrams, nothing crazy."

"I could definitely use that, thank you. Or thank Bailey," Olivia said.

"Holler if you need anything. Or text. I'll be in the living room playing games, like I usually am," Max said as they pulled the door shut behind them, leaving Olivia to relax while they tried to ignore their anxiety down the hall.

Max did play Wonderlands while Olivia took a bath, but they didn't accomplish much. They wandered around and completed some side missions, but they'd been distracted by their own thoughts too much to make any real progress with their campaign. Their mind kept returning to Thursday night, after they'd played Wonderlands together for a bit and put on a movie.

Bailey and Jess had stretched out on the sofa at opposite ends while Olivia claimed the big comfy chair. Max preferred the floor during movie time anyway, so it had worked out perfectly. Eventually, the bad view that the comfy chair provided forced Olivia onto the floor as well, where she fell asleep and accidentally cuddled Bailey's arm.

At least, they thought it was accidental. There was a lot of space on the floor and she'd chosen to lie just a foot away from Max. They'd covered her with a blanket when she passed out to keep her warm, but she ended up rolling towards them and wrapping both of her arms around one of Max's, probably seeking more warmth in the drafty apartment.

When Olivia awoke and found herself snuggled up with Max, she'd only acknowledged the Florida Gators blanket that was draped over her and not the fact that she'd been cuddling with Max. "Ew, who put this thing on me?" she'd asked, tossing it away as if it were covered in bugs. "Gross. Don't tell me one of you is a Gators fan. I will leave this apartment immediately."

"It's my ex's, calm down," Bailey had explained. "It's the warmest blanket we have."

After that, Max had called it a night. Olivia and Jess stayed for a bit longer, they assumed, but they'd retired to their bedroom around two in the morning. They couldn't fall asleep for about an hour, though, missing the feeling of Olivia's arms holding them tightly. Though she'd never shared it with them, Max's bed felt empty without her.

About an hour after Max had left her to relax, Olivia emerged from the bathroom looking appropriately calm. "I can't thank you enough, Max, that was amazing."

"Did that edible treat you well?" Max asked.

"It did. It is. I feel very good right now," Olivia said as she approached. "Is it okay if I hang for a bit? It's freezing out and I'm not ready to face the cold yet."

"Hang out as long as you want," Max said, gesturing towards the opposite side of the couch. "Just let me get to a good saving spot and we can watch something."

"No, play your game. I'll watch and scroll on my phone. Don't interrupt your night for me," Olivia said, pulling a fleece blanket — one that was definitely not the Gators blanket from the other night — over herself.

Olivia stayed until Bailey came home from a disastrous date with someone who was decidedly not Jess. Max didn't understand why he was going on a date anyway when Jess was clearly throwing herself at him and he was clearly into her.

"What was that all about?" Bailey asked after Olivia left.

"What was what all about?" Max countered.

"Oh, don't play dumb. You know exactly what I'm talking about," Bailey said, folding his arms and giving Max a look that was meant to tell them that they couldn't hide anything from him.

Except there was nothing to hide. Nothing had happened. They chatted a little but Olivia and Max had really just existed in each other's presence for a couple of hours. That was it. "There's nothing to tell."

"Bullshit," Bailey scolded Max. "Jess and I went through all that trouble and you're telling me that you two still won't acknowledge what's happening between you?"

Apparently, Jess had texted Bailey separately when Olivia mentioned the bath and asked him to offer their bathtub. The two had tried to conspire to create a tempting environment that might encourage Max and Olivia to address their feelings for each other. Which explained the "good job" text that Jess hadn't meant to send to the group.

"We're friends," Max emphasized. "That's it. We want different things. It doesn't matter if I have feelings for her or she has feelings for me. It can't happen because it won't work."

Olivia

Life was cruel. There was no other explanation for it. Olivia had decided years ago that she didn't want to go through what she'd watched her cousin, Kayla, go through - married and divorced by the time she turned twenty-five.

The jealousy had been unbearable to watch. Kayla had to keep her phone in her hand every time she went out because Jamie threatened to show up wherever she was if she didn't answer. She just kept telling Olivia that she had to try; she'd committed to trying. But after Jamie had followed through on her threat to show up unannounced, even without any missed calls, Kayla threw in the towel.

Olivia protected herself from that inevitability. A lifetime was a long time to commit to anything, let alone a person, and she was sure that couldn't do it. And wasn't that all long-term dating was? Searching for the person that you'd promise to put up with even when you really just didn't want to put up with them?

Forget all that nonsense. It wasn't that she doubted her ability to care for someone or that she didn't want to support someone; she'd really enjoyed the short-term relationships she'd had over the years. But the idea that she had to commit to something - to make a decision for her future self without any context of who her future self might be - kept her from continuing a relationship beyond a few months. A year tops. Once it got serious enough that she had to make a choice to try to want to be with her partner forever, or end the relationship before she made a decision she'd regret, she ended it.

That's not to say that Olivia had never been in love or even that she was afraid of being in love. She absolutely had been in love. A few times, in fact. She enjoyed the feeling of loving someone and being loved by them. But being in love with someone didn't mean she necessarily wanted to be with them forever.

Olivia looked at the spread in front of her. She'd spent more time cooking for Max than she had for herself over the last couple of weeks. It was important to her that she show them how grateful she was for the relaxing bath. It was even more important that she show Max how much she cared about them, though.

They'd only been friends for a few weeks, but they'd spent a lot of time together, including two long nights at Max's place. This was the first time Max was coming to her apartment and it mattered that they thought highly of her. Jess had helped with cleaning the night before but she suddenly, and suspiciously, had plans she'd forgotten about and left Olivia to cook the meal she'd planned for three for just her and Max.

Olivia hadn't told Max what she was making, but she had good intel about their favorite foods from Bailey that he'd offered up before she'd even had a chance to ask. Her friends weren't exactly being subtle. When were Bailey and Jess going to stop distracting themselves from their obvious attraction to each other by pushing Olivia and Max together?