All Comments on 'Darla's Blindfold'

Not gonna lie but I dont get it. What the fuck is happening there and why? I do get the sex part but the rest is just a confusing mess.

After reading this, I feel like I've somehow fallen into the middle of a James Joyce Stream-of-Conscious novel that not even Joyce understood. How did this happen?

I thought I must have missed an important clue that would provide the decryption key to understand even something. Ah, I thought. David is the key! But all he says is "Shhhh" once in awhile. That's not a very good decryption key, is it? Oh well. I give up. I think I'll go take the trash out.

Its like you were trying to write something astronomically impressive but it failed to launch.

Is there something missing here??????????

Cringeworthy at best.

First things first, well done you for actually having a go at this, it’s not easy and because everyone is essentially anonymous (yes including those with screen names because I know your parents didn’t name you “JWarrior47”) ...comments can often be bloody brutal.

The story you’ve presented comes across as kind of clinical, it’s obviously meant to be erotic but it doesn’t quite gel. It reads like a dull list of actions and trying to be mysterious at the same time, as the story unravels the reader discovers that this couple appear to have started experimenting with kink. It’s not clear if both are “switches” or if he’s just done something that’s really out of character for him. If you want to explore bondage games then communication and trust are vital (as well as S. S. C)

You need to be careful with descriptions after all you’re dealing with human anatomy “... to the crimson swath” so my first thought was; gross they’re both on their periods?!

I’m hoping that wasn’t the case because if I dwell on that unwanted line of reasoning I’m just going to vomit.

The Tags section is intended as a place for key words/ trigger warnings not random chunks of text so you could have put things like...

NonCon, reluctance, bondage, blindfold, lesbian, wife sharing, fisting, oral, consequences

Obviously it’s intended as a fantasy but I can tell you that none of mine include freezing my arse off after having been tied up and abandoned. None of that is sexy it doesn’t inspire trust or confidence in my partner’s ability to look after me, it’s stupid and dangerous. If their house went up in flames whilst he went to pick up this other woman he’d be looking at murder charges instead of a cold annoyed wife.

Thanks for having a go and sharing. I’d love to try myself but am rubbish with technology.

Tess (uk)