All Comments on 'David and Becky - Foolish Choices Ch. 13'

Will yjis story ever end?

Dull and repetitive. The visit with Doctor Petran is almost a copy and paste of her last appearance, and the paragraph about the legality of masturbation restrictions is almost a word-for-word duplication of similar passages that you’ve presented before. Astonishingly, Doctor Petran gives David no counseling for his increasingly self-destructive behavior, nor does she explain to him that the masturbation ban exacerbates his self-evident (to everyone but David) inclination to become reckless when aroused.

David’s character arc has barely advanced during his long months in the prison. He has learned almost nothing about himself, and even less about Becky. His self-reflections are mired in rote self-pity, with not one moment of introspection about how he could avoid any of the snares and booby traps of his prison experience. He has abandoned all agency in his life, and simply plods ahead into every mishap engineered by his far-more-clever antagonists. There are cows with better preservation instincts, and more wit.

The problem is not the sadism or the masochism. The last chapter’s video cuckolding/whipping scene was creative and erotic, for example. Rather, the problem is that David is a whiny bore stuck in a situation which is repetitive by design. The same events recur again and again, and his interior monologue never grows nor even changes much. It was fine for the first eight installments, but the allure has long since faded.

Thank you for keeping this story going and keeping me fantasies of the humiliation of poor weak little men alive. I wait impatiently for your next chapter.

same old shit gets ass beat carries bricks for christ sake get him out and away from Becky and in with Cassie someone who will take care of him not that whore of a slut wife

Please give us a time skip.

Not sure what to make of a chapter like this at this stage of his time in prison. What purpose does it serve other than to foreshadow that he will make more dumb decisions? What am I missing? But I am grateful that we finally got a summary of the bricks as opposed to a drawn out description (but it was kinda interesting the first few times). To those saying "tell your story," "Godot," and "different readers because different genres," I get what you are saying. I want OllyT's story too, and the genre has changed because he spliced together different stories (Jenny stuff ended up here?). I don't care about that. I just want the story to be of the quality of his earlier books...whatever his actual intention or point. Let's remember that this is an erotic story site, so it's not unreasonable to have expectations about that. I also understand those who see an opportunity missed because the story has gone off the rails because of execution or plot. We look forward to more, I think....

The Dr warns him against falling into any more of Becky or Madam Popescu’s traps. She hasn’t read the earlier books or all these chapters. This weak punk always always always always rushes into ANY trap ANY woman puts in front of him. And he loses. Then he whines. As predictable as the sun rising in the East.

Dr. Petran is a spy for the prison stff.

This is getting boring

It actually is getting kind of boring. I wish you would respond in the comments or in the beginning of your stories to readers comments. I don't know how many there of us total but I feel like there's only a few that comment.

King_MacAulay expressed a wish that I respond to individual comments. I always aim to respond to PMs, if a return email address is provided, which takes up some of my time. The comments board are for people to make comments which they are free to do, not prompts for me to engage in conversations with those who have problems with my stories. I don’t need to explain every word of every chapter to justify myself or my work. Responses would inevitably end up in futile arguments anyway, which I have absolutely no interest in and certainly don’t have the time for. I have responded on only a couple of occasions when I felt someone has made a factually incorrect statement, which was nothing to do with their opinion which is their right to give. I always post a general response when I have uploaded all chapters from each story and will continue to do so in that way.