Desperately Seeking Pleasure

"I don't know. I have other fish to fry."

So she told Savana about the speed dating. About all her classes. She was really doing well. Savana wasn't very happy about the dating.

"Have you been having sex with all these boys?" she asked.

"No, dinkus." Vanessa said laughing. "Who do you think I am?"

"An uncle fucker." Savana said under her breath.

"Well, now you know. I wonder if my mom and dad know?" Vanessa sighed. "I'm not going to have sex with him again, anyway."

"You keep waffling between not wanting him, and wanting him again. Which one is it?"

"I don't know, Savana." Vanessa sighed. "I need to think about some things. Besides, these guys probably don't expect sex from me. They're speed daters just like me."

"Oh man." Savana gasped as Vanessa told her about the app. She felt so sorry for her friend. She was treating sex like a game, and it wasn't about that. Cory seemed to think so as well. He had been hurt at Vanessa's avoidance. Savana remembered the expression on his face.

"Please stay healthy and clean." Savana said before they got off the phone. "And come home for Easter. And call Cory before his birthday. He's going nuts. He won't stop texting me."

"Since when do you two text?" Vanessa asked laughing.

"Since that one night he told me about you two."

"Do you think anyone else knows?" Vanessa asked getting a little nervous.

It was March. It was nearly Cory's birthday. He tried as hard as he could not to be alone with either of them. He did not want to find out if they knew.

"You all right, Cory?" Stu asked one day as they both sat watching TV. Cory was reading. Stu was watching.

"I'm fine." Cory said smiling. "Listen, I wanted to talk to you before it was too late. I'm getting a new apartment."

Stu gasped. Should he tell Cory he knows? Should he just let him go? Should he press charges? He didn't know when the last time they'd seen each other was.

"You have a new apartment already lined up?" asked Stu sadly. He had no idea what he should do.

"Yeah. I've been living here too long. Dilia doesn't very much like me. I'm feeling like I've over stayed my welcome."

"Why don't you talk to Vanessa." Stu said not even sure why he said that. He was trying to gather information.

"I don't think that'll make it better. She's busy with finals, and things. I don't want to bother her."

"Cory?" Stu asked turning to actually look at his brother-in-law. "Will you be honest with me if I ask you something?" he asked. They both held the gaze.

"Sure." Cory said dreading the question. He could feel his hands getting clammy.

"Have you been visiting Vanessa during your deliveries?" They both looked into the other's eyes.

"No, Stu." Cory said truthfully. "I haven't seen or talked to Vanessa in quite a long time."

"Would you tell me if you did?" Stu asked in a quieter tone.

"Yes." Cory said. He was convinced Stu knew. "I promise, I would tell you."

"Well, I'm going to regret this later. But why don't you go see her for your birthday?" he asked.

Cory was so sad. Stu knew what would happen if those two met, but he hated seeing Cory so miserable. He didn't ever talk to Vanessa, so he didn't know how she was doing. Maybe if he pretended nothing was going on, he could leave it alone. Yes. Denial is the answer.

She had done it. She had messed around with the wrong crowd. She was going to pay for it now.

She decided to go to a bar with one of her weight training class mates. He was a very tall very handsome guy. She found herself comparing him to her uncle, but she stopped those thoughts as best as she could.

They had driven to the other side of the city, and were in an unfamiliar area. He said they were going to his house. They'd hung out at the bar for a few hours. He was a little buzzed, but she was still clean. Now that they were in his car, she felt very uneasy.

"Before we go any farther," Vanessa said calmly. "I wanted to know if I could stop at my place. I forgot my fresh pajamas."

"It's all right. I'm sure my mom has something you can wear. She's just as beautiful as you are, Nessa."

"Oh god!" she cried out. "Please don't ever call me that!" she shouted. "Ever!" She felt tears in her eyes. She knew Cory would absolutely disapprove. She could almost hear his voice in her head.

"I'm sorry, baby." He said turning his head to look at her. "I won't do that again." He said as he handed her a drink.

She took it and finished half in no time. She felt a lot better after that. Her uncle's birthday was today. She'd completely forgotten. She wanted to call him, but she didn't think he'd want to talk to her. Savana encouraged her to call.

"All right, darlin'." He said as he turned the car off. "We're here. I've got the whole place all to myself." He smiled. "Mom won't be back in a couple days."

Something didn't feel right about this. He was too confident he was going to get in bed with her. She wondered if that was normal. Or maybe they both knew all along she was going to go to bed with him.

They talked for a long time. Both sitting down to drinks. They talked about the school year. The classes they both took. He poked fun at some of the teachers. He made her laugh a lot. Something she hadn't done in quite a while.

Before she knew it, she felt a lot more relaxed. She started to feel very sleepy. She told him she'd lay off the drinks for a while. She didn't even know what he said after, but she found herself with another glass in her hand. She gasped. She caught a few grains of something slowly dissolving into the liquid.

It was too late.

She felt so dizzy and loopy. She just wanted to sleep and be peaceful. She had to fight it. She had to find a way out. She really didn't want this man. He was too creepy. She should have known from the moment she got into his creepy car.

She had no idea what happened next. There was a lot of struggling, a lot of screaming. At one point, Jimmy had her down on the couch, and tried to soothe her. They fought for a long time, her trying to escape. She was going to lose the fight. He knew it. All he had to do was tire her out, and she was his. She had to get out. Had to stay awake. Had to get out. She knew if she stayed there, she might not make it out alive. That thought scared the crap out of her, and she got a new wave of adrenaline.

Cory sat there, wondering if she was ever going to come home. He had persuaded a dorm mate to let him up. He really wanted to surprise Vanessa. If she didn't come home, he didn't know where he was going to sleep. He would just have to go back to his car. Or, Stu's car. He sat cross legged on the carpet in front of her door. He started playing on his phone. He sent Vanessa a quick text. It was nine in the evening.

He busied himself with his phone. He had to go to the lobby a couple hours later. His phone was dying and Vanessa still wasn't here. It was almost one.

He dozed in one of the chairs as his phone charged. He was sure she'd come home. He was sure of it.

There was a loud crash as the double doors to the dorm opened. Cory jerked his head up. No one had come through them in a while. He looked at his clock. It was three in the morning. His heart skipped a beat. He hated three AM. Something about this time was dangerous. He'd had a lot of dangerous encounters at three.

The echoing lobby filled with sobs as a few people entered. It was two officers, a male and female. They were supporting a girl in their arms. She was crying and calling out for help.

"They did something to me!"

He jumped up almost knocking over the phone and chair. That voice. He ran to the trio and gasped.

"Vanessa!" he felt his gut fall to the floor. "What the hell's going on?"

"I can't go to sleep! I can't! Don't make me sleep!"

"Vanessa, it's your uncle Cory!" he said getting up in her face. "Can you hear me? What the fuck is going on?" he asked the officers as he took her from them.

"She was at someone's home, we believe, having a date or hook up of some kind. She says he drugged her, and was planning to do something to her. We checked out the guy, searched his place. He had drugs. We tested her at the hospital. Now she's supposed to go sleep it off."

"What did you find?" he asked feeling a cold chill. "Roofies?"

"Yes."

Cory nearly threw up. What had Vanessa gotten herself into?

He showed them proof that he really was related to her. They let her go, and he carried her upstairs. She was sobbing in his arms.

"Where are your keys, Vanessa?" he asked.

"I can't say!" She broke down into loud sobs again. A few doors opened. An RA came to investigate. She let them in, since Vanessa was so incapable.

"How do I know you're not the rapist?" asked one of the female RA's.

"It's my birthday today." He said sadly. "Or at least, yesterday. I was waiting for my niece to come home. I have identification."

"She can't recognize him." Said a voice. "I heard what happened. She got into it with Jimmy Stone. I think they're finally going to do something about his bullshit. Vanessa's the fourth girl he's tried to pull this stunt on."

"Did he get any of the others?" Cory asked afraid of the answer.

"No. They all managed to escape. To date though, Vanessa is the luckiest. When those things set in, you're out."

"I've gotta get her inside and calmed down." Cory said sadly. "Thank you for coming to help."

She made it home. She didn't know how, but she made it home. That shit head was gone. The officers made him go away. She was safe. She didn't know where she was, but she was safe. She fought it a little while longer. She could feel and hear herself having a civil conversation with someone. She didn't know who. She felt so disconnected from her body. What the hell did he give her?

She finally couldn't hold on. She felt her head spinning too much and light headedness creeping in. She really needed to stay awake though. She wondered if this was one of those drugs that leaves you open to suggestions.

"Don't let me go to sleep." She said as she lay on the bed. Cory was getting her pajamas ready. He smiled. It was a very sexy night gown.

"Do you know where you are?" he asked as he rummaged around. "Do you know who I am?" he asked.

"Yes. You're Cory. You wouldn't hurt me."

Interesting. She had periods of recollection. He didn't pry anymore. The rest could wait until tomorrow.

She cried when he got her undressed. She begged for the person to go away. She cried for Cory. Clearly she was out again. She was sobbing so loud. She wanted Cory.

Vanessa was trying so damn hard to hold on. She had no idea who was around her, but she needed to hold on. She just needed to. Someone was undressing her. She started to cry. She wished she had her uncle with her. He would never hurt her like this. The hands undressing her were soft and gentle. All a trap.

"Vanessa, can you hear me?" he asked as she calmed down a bit. "It's your uncle Cory. Can you hear me?" he asked.

"Don't let him get me! Please, don't undress me! He's here! I don't belong to him!" She still couldn't identify she was back home.

"Just let it all go, Vanessa, and go to sleep." He said as he climbed into bed with her. She let out a blood curdling scream. "It's all right!" he shouted back. "See, we're both clothed." He placed a hand on his chest so she could feel his clothing.

Vanessa felt so out of place. She was having a whole dialogue with someone and she didn't even know who. She was in bed, and her clothes were on. It must be an officer. He had taken her hand and placed it on his chest. He was wearing such a soft shirt.

"Don't let me go to sleep, please." She heard herself beg softly. "No sleep."

Cory held her as she finally let herself slip into unconsciousness. He called Savana that moment. He didn't care if he woke her up.

"Oh my gosh!" Savana was sitting on her bed, shocked. "I told her to be careful! I told her she shouldn't just be going out with random guys!"

"You knew about this?" he asked angry. "Why the hell didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't know you didn't know!" she said just as defensively.

"What do I do?" he asked.

"Just keep her safe, and wait 'til the morning." She sighed. "Have her drink a lot of water when she wakes up. These things should fade away after. I don't know how long after."

"They never said how much she'd actually ingested." He muttered.

Vanessa started to whimper again. "I gotta go." He said as he made his way back to the bed. "Call you in the morning."

"I can't stay here!" Vanessa sobbed as he climbed back into bed and held her. "I can't sleep. It's too scary."

"Listen, Vanessa, it's your uncle Cory. I'm not going to let anything happen to you. The sooner you sleep, the sooner you can wake up to tell me all about it."

"Would you please hold me?" she asked through her tears. "I'm so scared. He's here, I know it."

"He is not here." Cory said in an even tone. "I am here. I am the only one who matters to you right now. Me, and your sleep. So, go to sleep, and just know you'll be through this soon."

"What do I do 'til it passes?" she asked sadly.

"Sleep." He replied.

"It's so scary. It's a different scary than all the other types of scariness. This sleep is so crushing. It's hurting my head to stay awake. But I don't know what's on the other side. I'm hardly aware of what we're talking about right now." She cried.

"Here." Cory said as he grabbed a water bottle from her fridge. He helped her sit so she could drink it. She said it made her feel better. The cold of the water sliding down her throat. She felt a little less foggy. She drank half the bottle, and laid back down.

"Hold me, please." She said to the stranger. "It's too scary alone."

He got into bed as quickly as he could. Vanessa pleaded the whole time for him to hold her. He was coming.

"No one is coming." Cory said as he wrapped her up in his arms. "You got your water, I'm right here. No one is coming any time soon." He sighed. "Just close your eyes, and go to sleep."

"Please make sure I wake up tomorrow. Please make sure I wasn't raped. My uncle cory. My mom and dad. They'll be disappointed in me."

He squeezed her against him. She finally calmed down after a few minutes. Her head resting against his shoulder.

"I won't hurt you, Nessa." He said as tears filled his eyes. "I'd never hurt you."

She didn't dream. She just slept. She just slept hard. She wouldn't be surprised if she wet the bed. She had not yet remembered going to the bathroom. It was taking forever to wake up. Or was she awake?

When she woke up, her TV was on. Cory had put on one of his channels. She didn't remember what happened yesterday, but she knew Cory was here. If she focused, she did vaguely remember she had tried to go to the bathroom once, and he had helped her. Or was that a dream?

"Whoa. What hit me last night?" she asked groggily. "Has my bed always been in this studio?"

"Oh. Glad you're awake." He said as he came over to her bedside.

"When the hell did you come along?" she asked surprised.

"Yesterday night. Happy birthday to me."

"Oh, uncle Cory." She gasped feeling devastated. She was so awful for not texting him.

"Savana told me everything." He said sadly. "She knows about us. And she knows we know she knows."

"Why did you do it, Vanessa?" he asked as they sat down to breakfast.

"I knew it was too risky for us to do it. I wanted that again. I couldn't find anyone to do that with."

"Vanessa, why didn't you just ask me to visit or get me alone when mom and dad weren't there?"

"I don't know." She sighed. "I didn't want you to put some sort of emotional attachment to it. I'm not in love with you, uncle Cory. I don't want you thinking this means something. We just had sex."

He tried not to let the hurt show on his face. She thought they just had sex? Wow. He really did love the girl. This is all she'd been using him for.

They didn't have sex. They spent the day trying to catch her up on what happened. Then he took her out to lunch, and was planning to leave after. She was caught by surprise at how soon he was leaving.

"Who put my pajamas on?" she asked as he got ready to go.

"Me. All me. I promise. No one else saw you undressed."

She turned him around at the door.

"Do you..., have to go?" she asked looking into his eyes. "I mean, right away?"

They both closed the gap between them, and came together in a kiss. He sighed as he picked her up, and carried her back to the bed.

"Did he touch you?" Cory asked as he and she undressed. He was so anxious to hear the answer. He wanted to beat the crap out of this Jimmy guy.

"No. I don't think so. It's funny. I don't even remember how I got out."

He wrapped her up in his strong arms and squeezed her tight. He kissed her neck, her lips. He kissed her cheeks, so rosy and nice. He gently kissed her neck, and slowly went down. He laid her on the bed, and came to lay on top of her.

"I love you, Nessa." He said kissing her gently. "Please don't do that stupid stunt again."

"I promise, never again." She said as they began to kiss. "Mmm. Make love to me, please."

That was the first time she said that. He wondered how much to read into it.

"Mmm. No." he said in between kisses. "No. Vanessa, we can't do this."

"Why?" she asked as she thrust her pelvis up to meet his.

"It's too soon. Vanessa, we have to tell your mom and dad what happened. It's too important to keep secret."

So they did. They didn't end up having sex that day. The next day was a school day, and he had to go to his delivery.

"I'll come around in a few days. I promise I won't take long." He said as they said goodbye at the door.

"I love you." He said hoping she loved him back.

"I love you, Uncle Cory." She smiled as they hugged one more time. They made sure the coast was clear, and shared a wonderful kiss.

"Are you sure you have to go?" she moaned.

"So what do you remember?" Savana and Vanessa were talking a few hours later. Vanessa recounting what she could.

"Please, Vanessa. Don't ever do that again." Savana said sadly. "Sex is not worth that much. It's not even that fun."

"Oh, but Savana. It so is. And I'm so frustrated. I really need this so much."

Savana was really getting tired of this whole thing. Was this normal for asexual people to go through? Surely they weren't all this obsessed with sex. Savana thought the whole point of asexuality was they didn't want sex.

"Did you get to see Vanessa?" Stu asked as they sat in the kitchen. Both were munching on shrimp and rice. Cory had returned only a couple hours before.

"I saw her during her accident." He said as he swallowed.

"But..., did you get to, see her?"

Okay. He did know. There was no doubt in Cory's mind.

"No." he said truthfully. "I said no. It's just too soon. That was scary what happened to her. Of course, now she's mad at me."

"I think she said she was coming home for Easter." Stu sighed happily. "I'm glad you were there for her."

Cory felt awful. Been there for her? He was a terrible guy. How could he have let himself get this carried away with Vanessa? There is a perfect reason incest is not legal. He had no idea what to do. The goddess had stolen his heart.

"I want to talk to you." Cordilia said that evening as he tried to sit in his room and read. He wondered if this was it.

"Talk." He said as she sat down across from him on the desk chair.

"I wanted to apologize, for being such a jack ass. I never should have treated you like this all these years. I should know and trust that you won't hurt my Vanessa."

"That's right." He said hanging his head. "I wouldn't."

"Well, I'm very sorry. I'm going to try and relax my..., hold on things. Maybe she'll like me too."

"Oh, Cordilia. She loves you. Stu and I love you, too. Everything is fine."