Dreams, Drawings, and Panties

"Really? I was intimidated after reading your background. You have a Ph.D. and an MBA, and you apparently own your own company," said Alex.

"Well, thank you for not laughing at me," said Julia with a uneasy smile.

"Don't worry about it," reassured Alex.

"Thanks again," said Julia. "I react that way sometimes with tension or anxiety. Some people laugh after an orgasm and it can really cause problems with relationships sometimes. I see this sometimes in my counseling practice."

"Really?" said Alex.

"I don't see the orgasm and the laughing, but my patients sometimes tell me about it," she clarified nervously.

"Now that's funny," commented Alex with a genuine smile on his face. "I understood what you meant, but I enjoyed the clarification."

Julia smiled back at him and took a deep breath.

"Let me get you a drink. It sounds like you could use one," said Alex. "Everything here is good."

"Thank you," said Julia. "That's very nice of you."

Alex took another look at her. She seemed harmless and pleasant and was certainly attractive. She was VERY attractive. He couldn't help comparing her to the drawing of Emma, though. Her hair was shorter, straighter, and light brown. Her face had many similarities, but no one would mistake one for the other. She seemed less confident than Emma as he inferred from his transcript, but she seemed to have a certain sincere charm that he appreciated.

Alex's dark mood returned briefly as he imagined shoving his cock into her mouth to shut her up from laughing. He also imagined ripping open her blouse right here in the restaurant to see her tits. He felt an intense urge to see what her nipples looked like right now, and Julia was hiding them from him. He frequently was curious about women's breasts, but this time was different. He felt an intense impulse to stand up and actually rip her blouse open, and he could easily picture himself doing it. He recognized that these vicious impulses were creeping into his head, so and he took a deep breath. "Fake it 'til you make it," he thought to himself and tried to look friendly.

"I've always been susceptible to nervous laughter," said Julia as their server showed up with Alex's drink.

"What would you like to drink?" asked Alex before their server could ask. "Let me get this for you. I got a whiskey sour with lime."

"Do you have decaf iced tea?" she asked the server.

"We certainly do. Would you like that?" the server asked.

"Yes, that would be wonderful," she said to the server. "Thank you," she said while looking at Alex.

"Do you not drink alcohol?" asked Alex. "That's perfectly fine with me if you don't," he added uncomfortably.

"Oh, I do, but not tonight, though. Maybe on a second date," Julia said.

Alex wasn't quite sure what to make of that. Did she not trust him enough to drink on the first date? Maybe she's extremely cautious and conservative? Or maybe there was some other reason that had nothing to do with him, and the second date would be her first opportunity.

"Before our server came, you were saying something about always being susceptible to laughter?" mentioned Alex wondering whether it would be best to change the subject from alcohol.

"Yes, but I've never acted as inappropriately as I have tonight. I'm embarrassed and really sorry, Alex."

"Please, don't worry about it," reassured Alex as he was trying to convince himself as well.

"My mom was like this too," said Julia, "so I think that there is a genetic component. There's a story about my parents when they went fishing as a young couple before they had kids. They were in a boat and my dad accidentally hooked his finger. It was very painful, and they had to go to the emergency room to get it out."

"That sounds terrible," said Alex.

"Well, my mom could not stop laughing. It started the moment he got hooked."

"Really," said Alex.

"It made my dad angry, and the angrier he got, the more she laughed. She didn't think that it was funny, but the stress triggered it."

Alex laughed out loud, then stopped, and then giggled some more as he pictured the scenario. Julia giggled back, and Alex giggled some more.

"I think that I know what you're talking about," Alex said as he smiled. He felt a wave of darkness and tension leave his body. "I feel a little better now."

"Laughter can be good for the soul," said Julia with a relaxed smile on her face.

"So has your laughter ever caused any problems with any of your patients?" asked Alex.

"No, actually. Not even close," said Julia. "The dynamic is very different in that setting. I'm in control and the conversation is entirely about the patient and their problems."

"Makes sense," commented Alex. "So, tell me about how you got to where you are, and why you tried online dating and connected with me tonight?"

"Well, after getting my Ph.D. in psychology, I realized that I wanted to run the business, and not just be a counselor in a clinical psychology setting. I didn't want to be a professor either, but that's another topic. So, I got my MBA and then finally got started on the long road of setting up my practice and eventually a multi-practitioner clinic."

"You are the quite the over-achiever, aren't you?" said Alex with a smile. "I mean that in a good way."

"Thank you. As a consequence, though, I've been completely focused on my career for a very long time. I haven't been on a date in...well, it's been years, but I don't want to say how many."

"Yes, there are tradeoffs with social life and career," said Alex. "My social life has taken a back seat for my career as well."

"Well, I finally got an office manager to take some of the load off, and it looks like I can finally get some breathing room for dating. Besides, my friends are screaming at me to meet someone."

"Good for them," said Alex as he looked admiringly at Julia. She now seemed like a very different person from the hysterical little girl she seemed to be when they first met. He could easily imagine her as a doctor of psychology who confidently worked through complex problems with her patients and managed a business.

"Now, tell me about yourself," said Julia.

"Well, I came to this city years ago to be a marketing director, and it sounds like my social life has been similar to yours. I was hired pretty young for that position, and I had lots to figure out. It's paid off, but my social life has suffered."

"It sounds like we have that in common," said Julia as she smiled.

Alex noticed that he was much feeling better now than he had in the last 24 hours. Was it a coincidence that he felt better after being with Julia for a short time?

"Hey, are you feeling hungry at all?" asked Alex. "I know it's a little late, but I didn't eat much for dinner and I'm feeling a little hungry."

Julia laughed again, but in a much more relaxed manner this time. "I was just hoping that you would ask me that. I was helping out a friend after work today and didn't get much to eat," she said.

Alex remembered that it was Friday and that most people worked today, even though he had taken the day off. "They have a few things on the menu that are really good. Would you like to share something?" he asked.

"That sounds great," Julia answered. "I'm sorry to say that I have to get up at some ungodly hour to help out a friend with a charity event, so I won't be able to stay out too late tonight."

"That's okay," said Alex, feeling a little bit disappointed. He was beginning to truly enjoy her company. She seemed nice, and there was something about her demeanor and their chemistry that was drawing him towards her.

After they had picked out and ordered a menu item to share, Julia said, "So tell me about any hobbies or something that you enjoy in your spare time."

"Wow, now it's getting embarrassing," replied Alex.

"Something juicy and interesting?" asked Julia enthusiastically.

"Sadly, no. It's just that I haven't had time to follow up on my hobbies in a long time," said Alex.

"Awww," said Julia. "I was hoping that maybe you did nude modeling or something like that."

"No," chuckled Alex who hadn't expected this type of question from her, "but I do like to draw portraits. My specialty is pencil drawing, but I haven't had a chance to do much of it lately." Alex thought about his drawings from this morning, and that this response wasn't completely accurate.

"Really. So do you draw nudes?" Julia asked.

"I was hoping that you weren't going to ask that," said Alex with a grin. "Though I minored in art in college, and I drew a number of nudes back then...and a lot of other things...besides nudes."

"I'm just having a little fun with you. I'd love to see some of your work sometime," said Julia. "I'm a very visual person, but I'm absolutely terrible at drawing, so I enjoy photography."

"Photography is something that I've always been fascinated with, but I've never had time to really get into it yet," said Alex. "It's on my list of things to do."

"Well," started Julia, "maybe that would give us an excuse to get together sometime. We could talk cameras and or maybe go out to do some shooting somewhere."

"That does sound fun," said Alex as he envisioned the two of them getting together again.

Their food eventually arrived, and they continued to enjoy getting to know each other with many other topics as they nibbled on their entrée together.

"So," started Alex, "how do you feel about dreams?" Alex immediately wondered whether this topic was a mistake.

Julia looked back at him and paused. "What aspect of dreams are you referring to?" she asked. "Physiology? Interpretation?"

"I guess interpretation," replied Alex. "Is there something to be learned from a person's dreams?"

"Sometimes, a little bit," Julia answered. "There's a pop psychology culture that believes if you dream about your teeth falling out, then that means you are worried about money. I'm highly skeptical of those types of interpretations."

"Oh," said Alex. "I never really bought into that either."

"I generally subscribe to the theory that dreams are mostly just random thoughts from our memories that get scrambled and reassembled inside our heads," said Julia. "If you been bowling for twelve hours a day for three days, there's a good chance that your next dream will include something about bowling."

"That makes sense," said Alex.

"Though there are times when conflicts in dreams may mirror real-life conflicts, and that's where counseling can be useful. Or sometimes, just discussing dreams can help to break the ice with a patient. Though, it doesn't come up all that often, "said Julia.

"Interesting," said Alex.

"Have you been having some dreams that you'd like to discuss?" asked Julia.

"Oh, no," said Alex nervously. "Just curious."

Julia smiled at him. "You gave me that look I get from people when they are embarrassed to tell me about their dreams," she said. "They hint about their dreams, but then don't want to talk about it, and I see a certain look in their face. It's usually something sexual," she said matter-of-factly.

"I..." started Alex. "You're good," he finished almost blushing.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have stated that conjecture about your dreams," she said. "I crossed a line, there."

"It's okay, really," said Alex.

"I won't pry, but just remember that you aren't responsible for the content of your dreams," she said. "Some people worry that they may have a character flaw if they dream about something inappropriate, but it's just a random assemblage of thoughts."

"Okay, thanks," said Alex. "I can see potential for a lot of interesting conversations with you."

Julia looked at her phone and grimaced. "I hate to say this, but I really need to get going," she said. Alex couldn't help but show disappointment in his face. "I really wish that I hadn't committed to helping out my friend in the morning because I'd love to take us out to somewhere else for coffee and dessert. My treat, this time."

"Darn," said Alex.

"I'm helping out a friend to prepare for a charity event at an incredibly early hour in the morning, and I'm not a morning person," Julia said. "I'd much rather hang out with you some more."

"I understand," said Alex, "and I respect that you take your commitments to your friends seriously."

"Thanks, Alex," she said. "I appreciate your understanding." The two of them paused awkwardly.

Alex paid their bill while Julia used her phone to order a rideshare to pick her up from the café. As they left their table to wait outside, Alex said, "Hey, it's a long weekend for most of us," said Alex. "Do you have Monday off? Maybe we can get together again this weekend...if that's not too soon." Julia's face lit up.

"That's a great idea. My clinic is closed Monday, and I would love to get together again. I was going to suggest the same thing," said Julia.

"Great," said Alex. "I know a place that is having a nacho festival tomorrow night if that works for you."

"That sounds fun!" said Julia who immediately frowned afterward. "However, I'm probably going to be tied up tomorrow night helping my friend take things down for her charity event, but I expect to be free Sunday evening. Are you available then?"

"Sunday sounds great!" said Alex. "I'll find some other place for dinner and give you a call."

"Yes, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing you again soon!" said Julia as she touched her hair.

As a car drove up to pick up Julia, she faced Alex and gave him a quick hug. "I really had a wonderful evening. Thank you," she said.

"I did too," said Alex. "I'll call you soon with plans for Sunday."

Alex began to walk home as Julia rode away and smiled as he thought about her. "I could really fall for her," he thought to himself. "She's highly intelligent, ambitious, and kind." He thought about her keeping her commitment to her friend even though it disrupted their dating plans to some extent. "I can really respect that. And wow! She's extremely attractive." He also couldn't help but imagine what she might look like without her skirt and blouse. "And maybe a little bit nutty," he thought as he remembered her laughing incident when they first met, "though it seems to be in a harmless way...and it was quality that made her a little bit mysterious and interesting." The weather was nice, and Alex felt better than he had in a long time.

"I think that she brings out brings out the best in me," Alex thought to himself. "I'm still not sure what to think about her and alcohol. She wasn't shy about bringing up nude modeling, so I suppose that she isn't too prudish," he thought. Prudishness would be a deal killer for him. A kiss would have been nice instead of a hug, but it was a nice hug.

Alex then realized that he hadn't thought about Emma for quite some time. "I'm definitely leaning towards the theory that she was just an imaginary person in a dream, conjured up only in my brain...maybe from loneliness. I work too much." He felt relieved and relaxed. He was just a few more blocks from his apartment and continued thinking about his evening as he continued his walk. He turned his last corner and could see the sign for the antique shop below his apartment about a hundred yards away. He continued walking until he was about 30 yards away.

"Alex!" he heard from behind him. He turned to see someone who he thought was Julia at the same corner he had just emerged from. He raised a hand to wave and responded with "Julia?" The woman began to jog towards him, awkwardly, because of her heels. Alex was puzzled as he walked back to meet her.

"Alex!" Julia said enthusiastically. "I almost lost you!"

"I didn't expect to see you again so soon," said Alex. "I thought that you needed to get home."

"I changed my mind," said Julia breathing heavily. "I wanted to see you."

"I saw you leave in your rideshare," said Alex.

"I had him turn right back and I paid him off. I could see you for several blocks ahead of me and I've been trying to catch up with you on foot. I thought that I had lost you when you turned that corner," she said, still breathing heavily.

Alex was honestly happy to see her again but was quite perplexed. "Don't you have an event in the morning?" he asked.

Julia paused briefly but said, "Yes. I'll be fine."

"Were you still wanting to get coffee," asked Alex.

"Yes, coffee," said Julia. "Do you live around here?"

Alex paused while he thought. There was a shop in the opposite direction, but they always had an annoying person singing and playing an electric guitar on Friday nights. He thought some more. "I live just a few of buildings away," he said, answering her second question. "If you feel comfortable, I'd be happy to make some coffee for us in my apartment," he added, wondering whether he should have made the offer.

Julia's eyes lit up. "That would be wonderful, Alex. I'd love that."

"I have some decaf," added Alex. "Caffeine will keep me up."

"Yes, thank you. That's so nice of you," said Julia.

As they approached the stairs to his apartment, Alex felt his dark and impulsive mood returning. He was also feeling impatient and irritated with Julia, though he still felt heavy physical attraction. Initially, he was curious as to why Julia seemed less concerned about her commitment to helping her friend in the morning. As of now, though, he didn't care. All he thought was that Julia and her tits were coming to his apartment. While they were at the restaurant together, all he could see was her face and the top of her torso. Her tits looked great, but now he could see her hips and he wondered about that pussy that she kept hidden inside her skirt.

They stepped into his apartment and Alex turned on a lamp in the living room. He had left on a light in his bedroom with the door open, so it wasn't completely dark in there when they arrived. He took a deep breath and pushed the dark thoughts out of his mind. "Damn, this is hard!" he thought to himself. Julia was in his apartment, but he was not going to behave improperly with the body of this wonderful human being.

"Nice place you have here," said Julia.

"Thank you," said Alex. "Did you want decaf as well?" he offered. Keeping himself busy with the task of making coffee might help keep the darkness away. Fake it 'till you make it.

"Yes, some decaf would be great," said Julia as she looked around the room.

"She really is a sweet person," Alex reminded himself. "I'm looking forward to getting to know her." He entered the kitchen, retrieved the coffee beans, and placed them on the counter as Julia entered the kitchen and approached him. She stepped up to him and kissed him. Her lips felt magical. She stepped backed and they looked into each other's eyes. Alex stood frozen. He urgently craved to kiss her again. He wanted all of her. Yet, he doubted himself. Was this the dark impulsiveness compelling him? He was determined not to let the darkness win. But this was hard. Really hard. Was this the darkness wanting her, or was it really him honestly desiring her?

Julia kissed him again, but this time, their kiss lingered. Her lips felt warm. He could perceive her warm breath as she exhaled from her nose onto the side of his face. Her mouth opened ever so slightly and then closed again, pulling both of their lips slightly apart and then back together. Alex felt her hands upon his back and then felt his own hands reflexively touching her back. Her soft breasts pressed against his chest as they moved their bodies closer. Her mouth opened again slightly, and Alex felt her tongue press against his own lips. He pressed his own tongue against hers and they danced together inside their mouths.

Alex had never felt this out of control of his own body in his life. His hands slid down below her skirt and then slid upward inside to touch her thin panties. It was almost as if someone else were inside his body and he was merely witnessing what was going on. He heard Julia hum briefly as he touched her panties. Julia led them both out of the kitchen, and she looked towards his bedroom.