Elise Ch. 31

"Elise," Chapter 31 (no sex)

Elise

Mom was planning to divorce Dad? I didn't believe it. Granted, he might not have been a very good husband or father the past few years, but divorce?

I kept listening. And they kept on arguing. I could tell Dad was very angry. I had heard him like this only rarely, and it had never failed to scare me.

In a mocking tone, he responded to Mom's latest accusations and threats. "You have no proof of anything. If you try to do anything to me, I'll win, you won't get a penny, and you and your filthy slut of a daughter will be out on the street, scrounging for your next meal." In an even more belittling way, he continued, "Or maybe that dirty old pervert your daughter's fucking will have mercy and take you two in."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was this what my Dad really thought of me? Had he always felt this way? And if he had, why had I ever worried myself about doing anything to earn his love or approval? When did he become so viciously mean, so judgmental, so spiteful and malicious toward his own wife and daughter?

Mom's response was so calm, it was chilling. "I think not, Ross dear. I took the liberty of hiring a private investigator to look into your activities in San Francisco. He provided me a full dossier on you and your sweet little side piece, including very incriminating photographs and lots of useful information. I have my copy in a secure place, the investigator has a copy along with written legal authorization to release everything to the public if anything should happen to me. And a third copy of everything is in the hands of Royce Quinlan, who is handling my case, and who I believe you're aware is the best divorce attorney in the Central Valley."

"You're bluffing, you frigid, miserable little bitch." I could hear the absolute hatred in his voice in every word. I shuddered.

In response, Mom was so calm, so matter-of-fact, that I almost found that frightening as well. "You'll find out whether I'm bluffing this coming week, my dear, when I file for divorce on Monday, and when you are officially served with the papers at your office. They're already drawn up, waiting for my phone call to Royce's office to set it all in motion. And your behavior today toward me, as well as toward our daughter, has assured beyond any doubt that I will be making that call to his office first thing Monday morning.

"This being a no-fault, community property state, I'm getting half of everything, including this house and my car. The divorce will be final in six months after filing, and you'll be free to do whatever the hell you want with your sweet young thing back in the city. If you so much as contest any of it, everything will be made public, and everyone you know, both in Blanksville and in San Francisco, will find out what you really are and what you've been doing. And that promise applies equally in case of any retribution made toward any member of this family or toward anyone associated with any of us. By you OR by our son. So if I were you, I'd have a talk with him soon."

Dad changed his tune then. "You wouldn't do this -- this divorce. You need me. You've always needed me. How would you get by?"

Mom found that very funny. I could tell by her deep laugh. "You haven't been paying a lot of attention, have you, Ross? I'm a nurse. I work long hours at two jobs, with overtime, in a profession that pays well. I have taken good care of myself, with no help from you, practically since Elise was born. I have been doing, and will do, more than fine on my own, thank you."

Dad's voice had lost even more of its steam. "You'll regret this, Elaine."

Still eerily calm in her tone, she responded to that. "I think not. Now I'd advise you to pack yourself back up, drive back to San Francisco, and think hard on what you're going to do. That's where you want to be anyway, so just go. There's nothing left for you here."

"I think I'll just do that. It's clear that this family, at least you and your daughter, have no use for me, and certainly no appreciation for all the things I've done for you."

Mom declined to respond to that, adding only, "And for your own peace of mind, do talk to Brett before you go, and make sure he's not intending to do anything stupid."

Just then, I heard movement, and I knew that was my cue to retreat back into my room as quickly as I could. I did so, scrambling quietly back up the stairs, then opening and shutting my door as quietly as possible, locking it behind me. I laid across my bed, trying to process what I had just heard.

Dad had been unfaithful. Mom was divorcing him. Dad had said some truly shocking and hateful things about both Mom and me, things I wasn't sure I could ever forget -- or forgive for that matter.

On the other hand, if Mom's threats were any indication, Sandy and I were safe. Brett was still out there, and if he was willing to follow me to Sandy's house and say what he did this morning, I wasn't sure he might not try something even more drastic. I hoped Dad would indeed talk with him, and more than anything, I was wishing my brother would just go back to Seattle and stay there. I had nothing to say to him, and after what he had just done and said, I might not ever.

I had just been betrayed, in some of the cruelest ways possible, by the two men I had known the longest -- my father and my brother. I felt nothing for either of them at that moment.

Today had changed everything, forever. My life, and my family, would never be the same again. I was certain of that.

***************

I waited patiently in my room for things to settle, and for Mom to call me down. I knew she would when she considered it safe to do so, and I knew we would talk. I now felt more comfortable with her than I ever had, and after I heard how she had read Dad the riot act with regards to Sandy and me, I knew that she had my back -- our backs -- completely.

As for Sandy, I texted to inform him that everything was going to be OK today, and for him not to worry. He responded with some cute little "relieved" emojis. He sure had a lot of unique ways to help me pick up my spirits a little whenever it was needed. Just another of the many little things I appreciated about him.

Finally, Mom called me down. This was going to be an interesting conversation.

As I seated myself at the kitchen table, she got right to the point. "How much did you hear?"

No more hiding anything from my mother. I immediately replied "All of it."

She smiled. "Why am I not surprised in the least?"

Looking right at her, I asked, "Did you actually expect me to accept not hearing a discussion that concerned me? I'm an adult, Mom. I'm mature for my age -- always have been. I'm doing very adult things. I'm ready for any adult conversation you can have, particularly about me."

"No, I suppose I didn't expect you to, dear. And had it been me, I'd have wanted to hear it, too. But, as you no doubt heard, most of it was not about you, and that which was, unfortunately got pretty ugly."

I was ready for that one. "Yeah, but I needed to hear for myself what was said about me. And what I was doing was what brought the whole thing on."

Mom shrugged her shoulders. "True. Without your Dad's and Brett's ridiculously overwrought reactions to what they found out you were doing, we never would have had that conversation today. But dear, we would have had it soon, anyway. Things could not have gone too much longer the way they were -- not knowing what I know. And, as you heard, I was ready, anyway."

My voice was quiet, almost trembling, as I asked, "Mom, are you sure you want to divorce Dad?"

"As of right now, never surer of anything in my whole life, sweetie." Pausing, she added, "How does that make you feel, Elise?"

"Honestly, Mom, after the terrible things I heard Dad say, I don't know whether to be sad or glad. Maybe a little of both right now."

Just then, she reached out and hugged me close to her. "I understand completely. After a couple of seconds, she pushed away, looking at me. "I want you to know that as a result of all this mess and all that will happen in the next few months, only one thing will change in any appreciable way. And in fact, it has already changed."

I eyed her, quizzically. She went on. "I will be a lot more involved in your life from now on, assuming you want me to be." I nodded vigorously at that. She smiled, continuing, "Oh, you know how my work schedule is. I won't be at every one of your games, not even most of them. But I won't miss any opportunity to share my time with you, try to make up for all the years I put my own selfish concerns ahead of you and Brett."

"I'd love that, Mom. You know I would."

She nodded, her eyes getting a bit glassy. "And dear, I'm also going to spend the next few months evaluating where I want my career to go at this point. I'm getting to my mid-40s, and it's time for me to do that anyway. I've found that I love my work at the nursing home, but that doesn't pay nearly as well as my full-time job at the hospital. So we'll see.

"Anyway, how I come out of the divorce financially will have something to do with all that too, but at any rate I expect us to be comfortable. Your dad did provide for our household, at least money-wise, and that allowed me to sock away a lot of my income over the years. I have a nice nest egg saved up, and Mr. Quinlan will make sure that is also untouched in the divorce settlement."

There was something else I wanted to talk about, so I changed the subject.

"Has Dad gone back to San Francisco?"

Mom sighed. "As far as I know, baby. He left a while ago."

"Does that mean I can go back over to Sandy's this afternoon?"

"Don't see why not. But I think it would be a nice courtesy if you first explained to him that your brother is still out there somewhere, and you should let it be his decision whether he wants to have you over this soon under the circumstances."

"OK, Mom. Will do. And Mom?"

"Yes, dear?"

"I'm sorry it's all going down like it is. Despite everything, I wouldn't have wanted our family to break up like this."

"Elise, I want you to realize that there's nothing you could have done to keep it together. This was your father's doing, no one else's. I refuse to let either of us feel guilty about what's happening. Promise me you won't, honey."

"OK, Mom. But you might have to remind me sometimes, if I start getting bummed about it."

"You come to me any time you do, sweetie, and I'll be ready with a nice pep talk. And a lot of hugs." She kissed me on the cheek. "Now you go call Sandy like I asked. And tell him I'm doing OK over here, and not to worry. And if he wants you over there, feel free to go."

I smiled. "Thanks Mom." I ran to the stairs, bounding up to my room to call my friend.

***************

Sandy did indeed want me back over to his house. So I freshened up a bit and headed over.

He greeted me at the door, and once inside gave me one of his best hugs. When he disengaged, he said softly, "Quite a day, huh, little one?"

"Yes, Daddy." Suddenly I felt fatigued. Too fatigued even to want to play.

Sandy sensed this, too. "Let's sit right here on this couch, sweetie, and if you don't mind talking about it, I'd like to know what just went on over at your house."

So I plopped my slender frame onto the couch, and in the next few minutes filled him in. Sandy was sitting as close as he could get to me, one arm around me to keep me close. When I got to the rough parts, the ones where my father had said those awful things about me, he pulled me in for a nice long hug, whispering "I can't believe that. I'm so sorry you had to hear that."

Toward the end of the telling, the full impact of this day's events hit me fully for the first time, and the tears started coming. I hitched once or twice, then really let it all release. My Daddy was right there. "Let it out, honey. Just let it out. You're entitled to have a good cry. I'm right here. You're not alone. Just lean right into me and let it go. I'll help you take it on."

And he did. And as fast as I felt my strength ebbing from the emotional toll of it all, I felt new energy flowing back into me just as surely. It was because I knew for certain that I had two wonderfully empathetic friends, two great role models, to lean on for whatever support I needed. My mother, and the man right next to me, my lover, both of them so wise and so mature, both so very concerned about my well-being. And as my tears started to dry up, I shed a few fresh ones, tears of gratitude this time. Gratitude that I was so blessed, and that I knew I wouldn't have to face any of the changes coming in the next few months alone.

The tears finally stopped, and for the next few minutes I just breathed easily, resting in the very place in all the world I wanted to be at that moment, in my Daddy's arms. And he just held me, no words passing between us, just him punctuating this short period of comfort and serenity with a few light kisses to my face and my hair.

Finally, I straightened up and gave him a light little kiss on the mouth. "Thank you for being here for me, Daddy. You're the only one with whom I could sit and deal with this right now."

"It's a privilege for me to be able to help in this way, my babygirl. And although you may not have thought about it lately, I'll bet you're hungry."

He was right. I hadn't realized it, but all of a sudden I was very hungry.

Let's go sit in there," pointing to the door into his dining area, "and I'll fix us a bite to eat. It's after two o'clock, after all."

As he did and we ate, we talked about the rest of the weekend. Sandy said that there would be no sex between us for the duration. I protested that at first, but his reply was so wonderful, so considerate of me, and made such sense, that I could no longer object.

"Baby, sex is such an emotional thing for me, and one of the things I try to do every time is to make it the same for my partner. You are in mourning now. You might not realize it, but you are. You're mourning some very real losses that have already taken place, and are going to occur, in your life soon. And that takes such an emotional toll, there's no way I'm going to overload you by making further emotional demands of you just now.

"And by the way, in so doing I'm taking care of myself as well. After all, a sweet young woman I care deeply about has just come to my door to be comforted, having been through a very traumatic experience, and my knowing that and experiencing some of the after-effects of that experience makes me sad as well. I'm having a bit of an emotional upheaval myself, in case you can't tell, so I'm gifting myself with a break from being overwhelmed. Can you understand that?"

I could, but I had been thinking that sex might help take our minds off the whole mess for a while. But that was just the horny, recently sexually awakened young woman in me thinking like that. It turned out that my Daddy had a much better idea of ways of accomplishing the same thing. In the end I had to agree that his approach was much better under the circumstances.

After lunch, I asked if I could lie down with him and cuddle, as long as I wanted, for the rest of the afternoon. He agreed, but set conditions that no clothes would come off, that nothing we'd do would become sexual, and that I would text or call my mom before we laid down, to assure her that everything was OK. I readily agreed to these, quickly texting Mom with the message, at the same time asking her to please call me if she needed anything.

For the rest of the afternoon we cuddled. Quietly, we talked some more about what had happened, and about anything and everything else besides. We had long comfortable periods of silence too, during which our only activity was making soft, leisurely strokes through the other's hair or over their back. I even dozed off for a while, waking up the same way I had fallen asleep -- cradled protectively in my Daddy's gentle arms.

***************

The next day, Saturday, Sandy and I went out together as friends for the first time. I had been overjoyed to hear that he liked well-made rom-coms, and we took in one in a matinee at the cinema, his arm around me the entire time. Then we went all over the mall, just browsing, not buying a lot, but just being together, constantly kidding one another about one thing or another.

Finally, we ate at the mall food court before heading home. I was so thankful for the past two days spent with Sandy, just doing regular things that good friends do, and how being with him helped take my mind off what had happened on Friday. After I got home, my mind felt refreshed, and my emotions no longer felt so raw. I felt ready to attack some schoolwork on Sunday, then resume classes on Monday.

Going to sleep Saturday night, my last thought was of how I was looking forward to enjoying anal sex for the first time. I knew Sandy would make it special -- like he had everything else we had shared. I hoped that on my next visit to his place, there would finally be nothing getting in the way.