Eloise

I looked around at everyone, none of them leaving. "The sheriff has the right of it, I'm sure," I spoke up softly. "Whatever he told you is what happened. He was here last night and heard me say it."

"These folks from the mountain just came in and killed our people and make off with our kids! It ain't right!" a woman yelled.

Someone pushed in the door. "El!" Pa yelled loudly. "El! They finally let you out of that room! Are you hurt?"

"You mean I finally woke up, I guess, after what the doc gave me for what Henry Dufresne did to me last night. Still hurting from it, if you care at all. Can hardly talk louder than a whisper."

"That was all a misunderstanding! This man had no call to step in and..."

"If he hadn't I'd be dead right now! I thought I was gonna die, papa, I was sure of it! I couldn't breathe and he wasn't going to stop until I never drew another breath! All because I said I didn't want him as a husband and I wouldn't marry him! He called me horrible names and said awful things! You have no right to try and twist and turn it to make Henry into a victim when he was set on killing me and raping me while he was doing it! You heard what all those men said! What they all saw with their own eyes! Why are you so set on keeping me here and marrying a man who'd treat your own daughter that way? You hate mama that much, that you can't stand the thought of having to be alone with her? Or is it just because you hate the thought of taking care of her yourself with no one to help you? You can't lock me here forever to take care of you and her both, I have my own life!"

"She's your mother! I'm your Pa and we gave you life, you OWE us!"

"And I've been paying that debt my whole life! I'm done paying now! You just go on and figure that you and Henry worked out your deal and he got his way. If things had gone like you wanted, I'd be dead right now, Pa! That man saved me from him and from you! So as I figure it, I'm dead to you. Dead to you and it's him I owe a debt to now. He aims to see me marry his son and I guess I want to go ahead and do that. Go on and leave us in peace now! Tell Mama I love her and I'm sorry I can't say bye, but if I step foot over there without either of these men, you'd just shove me in a hole till they were gone. That's a shameful fact! Go on and pretend you had your way and I'm dead now. Leave me to my new husband."

"El!"

"You heard'r," Buel growled, standing up, Colton standing up right next to him. "Get out of here and leave'r alone. The rest of you too, you heard what happened, let'r eat in peace!"

Pa scowled, but hurried away like he was going to go try and talk Sam out of coming. Others drifted out after him, but a great many people stayed and whispered, watching us as we ate breakfast.

"You good?" Buel asked me, looking me over as I sat hugging myself.

"Yessir."

"Buel. Don't hold with no 'sir'n me. Boy, sit here with'r while I go get the wagon ready. I reckon that boy's gonna need to be ready to go soon with how that git went off after him."

Colton gave the man a nod, then cut his eyes at me quickly before going back to eating hurriedly.

I could hardly touch my food, especially with how everyone was still watching me.

Gene Westfall came hurrying in the door as Colton finished up and moved to stand. "El! Eloise! I... I got word on what happened. You ain't really going up the mountain, are you?" he asked quickly, avoiding looking at the scowling Colton.

"I am," I told him, looking down at my hands.

"You could stay? I have a place now and..."

"No, Gene, no thanks. Sorry, I already said yes to Colton here. It's how I want it."

"But it's not done yet! You could change your mind and..."

"Sheriff said the words last night."

"But he's not the preacher! Preacher has to say the words for you to be married! Law only does the marry'n if it's the preacher who's getting hitched, everyone knows that!"

"Just so, there's a preacher on the mountain who'll be saying the words once we get up there. It's what I want. Sam's goin' too, you should go see if he needs any help and say your byes to him."

"El! El, I was making a nice place for you? I was about to ask you and I was getting things all ready for you! I even ordered some nice things for you!"

"Maybe if you were nicer to Abby and not such a beast to her I would have considered you," I told him angrily. "But you're just as rotten as your brother and your pa, just as mean."

"I was never mean to you!"

"But I saw how mean you were to others! Excuse us, Gene, we're leaving now," I told him, then Colton stood up and towered over the tall and skinny Gene.

Gene backed away quickly, looking up at Colton in alarm.

I hurried out, Colton right behind me as whispers got louder all around the room.

Buel had the wagon ready and Sam was packing crates into it as he scowled, trying to ignore Papa who was hissing in his ear.

"That everything?" I asked Sam.

"Two more boxes," he told me, ignoring papa. "Gene! Come on and help me with the last two crates."

Sam hurried, Papa following him and trying to talk 'reason' into him as Gene followed him, giving me a baleful look as he went.

"Who's that?" Bule demanded, watching Gene disappear into the store behind Sam.

"Fella askin' after'r," Colton answered, then took hold of my waist and lifted me over the side of the wagon to sit on the back.

I made an embarrassing squeak as I gripped his wrists, but he let me go as soon as my feet were settled and I sat down quickly on the bundle he motioned to. It was soft, whatever was under the tarp, and it put me back to back with Buel as high up as it was.

Sam hurried back out with a bag on his shoulder and carrying a box, Gene behind him with another box.

Papa stopped in the doorway, hands on his hips as he glared, seething at all of us.

Gene handed Sam the box, then moved closer to me. "You sure you won't reconsider, El? I'd be good to ya."

"Piss off, boy," Buel rumbled. "She's spoken for. Step back 'fore I crush your feet."

With that Buel snapped the reins and the wagon lurched forward, Sam barely having time to throw himself into the back as we all took off. Sam worked his way closer to me, sitting on a crate of his own books as he gave me a halfhearted grin.

"Guess this is it? You ok?" he asked me.

I saw Colton turn his head so he could see me answer.

"I think so," I agreed. "Wasn't figuring on Gene showing up? You send for him?"

"Not me, but I thought he might. He's always had a shine for you, El, I told you that."

"You tell him I didn't like him at all?"

"More than once. He said he was always good to you, never mean like you said."

"But he was mean to other people. To Abby especially."

"Told him that too, he said it wasn't the same," he shrugged. "Anyway, that's done. You scared?"

I glanced at Colton and he looked away quickly. "A little," I admitted softly, gripping the back of the seat as the wagon lurched and rolled along.

Sam and I both went quiet after that, him looking nervous and excited as he sat imagining what was waiting for him. I was mostly just nervous as I snuck peeks at Colton's profile. More than once he looked over his shoulder at me, but only briefly each time. Never to look at me or study me like I was watching him. Mostly just like he was checking to make sure I was still there and awake.

In the afternoon, it was Buel who broke the silence, making me jump. "You need to get some rest, go on'n do it. Won't get home till after dark. There's some hard tack in the bag there in the corner if you need to eat and water in that barrel there. I suggest ya sleep as ya can since ya didn't get much last night."

"Thank you, s... Buel. Not really hungry or tired really... but do you think we could stop a minute and I could take a walk into those trees?"

In answer, he reigned in and stopped the wagon. "I've a mind to wander the trees a moment myself, but that side over there," Buel nodded. "Boy. Sam. We're walking over to those trees whilst your sister goes over to those there. Come on."

I was quick, hurrying to relieve myself back in the trees behind a bush while also keeping an eye on all the men to make sure no one was peeking. They all did their business more slowly, giving me time, so I was back in the wagon before they were. As soon as they came back, I passed out food to all of them, making myself useful. Or at least feeling like I was being useful.

Buel was the only one who grunted a thanks, Colton just giving me a hooded look. Sam grinned at me, but turned back to look out at the trees and daydream. Sam was always daydreaming.

Moving up to my knees, I leaned up between Buel and Colton. "So what's it like up there?" I asked softly.

"Cold," Buel answered, chewing.

Sam moved closer to listen.

"I mean where you live. Your house. How many kids do you have?"

"Seventeen," Buel answered softly. "Oldest few has me some grandbabies already and youngest is same age as the oldest grandbaby. Six oldest have me grandbabies. Then, Colt, he's slowest to marry. Gracie'll be 18 come Christmas and she'll marry the boy there, give me grandbabies soon enough. I have 6 more younger'n Gracie, and Jake's the littlest of mine. He'll be 8 in a few weeks."

"His ma sounds busy," I offered lightly, trying to imagine 17 kids."

"She passed when Jake was just over a year old. Somethin' bit'r, we don't know what. Just know she hollered after pulling wood from the bin and held her arm. Saw the bite, but not what done it. It swelled up and her breath left her before we could do anything at all. She's buried alongside two of mine that didn't make it. Jess was born without life and Jimmy was two when he got a fever and passed. Been lucky with the rest of'm, grandbabies too."

"You all live in one house?" I asked, trying to imagine it.

"Naw. Naw, there's one big house for us, but most of the older ones live in their own houses nearby. We eat together most days, but we live and sleep in our own homes. Anyone ain't married lives in the big house, Lissa and Mark too. She cain't have littles, so she stays and helps with the others. Sometimes t'other women too, when their men are off huntin' or trappin' or the like. They'll stay at the big house till their man comes home. We'll start on Colts house soon as Spring hits, but he has his own room. Plenty big and plenty private."

"So how many people total live up on your... property?" I asked, amazed at how many of them there were."

"Forty? Forty five? How many grandbabies I got now, Colt?"

"Dunno," Colt shrugged, looking out at the trees.

"Colt don't spend much time with'm. The littles. Not much of a hand with'm," Buel informed me. "So I guess it's good you might not be able to have any. Doc tell you so, or you just figure cuz your size?" Buel asked bluntly.

"My size," I murmured, blushing and peeking at Colton again. He didn't like kids? What sort of man didn't like kids and didn't want them?

"Might be as you're right, but might not too. Gwen isn't so small as you, but she's small. She's got 4 now with Michael. Is it 5? Almost 5, she's heavy with another just now. Won't be long to find out, I'm sure," Buel spoke lightly.

I blushed and glanced at Colton again, but he was staring hard at the trees.

"We'll start on yours and Gracie's home this spring too," Buel told Sam. "Till her birthday, you'll be bunking up with my other single sons. Once you're married, you can have a room to yourselves till your house is done."

I thought about all he'd said and he went quiet as I sat considering all of it. A home with a family that big, homes close together and everyone staying right there near each other. Colton stayed facing away so I couldn't even look over his profile anymore.

As it got dark, I was starting to wonder how Buel could see. Did the horses just know the way? How close were we?

I was starting to get tired, to nod off when Sam spoke up. "El!" he whispered.

I sat up and looked at him in the moonlit darkness, then looked where he was looking. There were lights ahead, quite a few of them.

"Comin' UP!" Buel yelled loudly, making me squeak and fall off the bundle behind him. Sam caught me and helped me sit up as we pulled in to all the lights and the people coming out of all the houses. There was a huge house, a huge barn, several smaller houses and smaller buildings like a smokehouse and grain bin. Mostly, there were people. LARGE people. Everyone seemed so big, even the woman as they all came out and converged on the wagon to bring things in and meet the new people.

"You finally found one?" A young man asked, clapping Colton on the back as Colton got out and turned to lift me over the side.

"What's her name?"

"Who's that?" A younger girl asked, tall and willowy, hugging Buel quickly but looking at Sam.

"That's Sam. A man with books and a learnin' and all. Whad'ya think of him?"

"He's awful pretty," the girl blushed. "Is he for me?"

"He is," Buel agreed, smirking, his whole face lighting up as his eyes shone in the firelight. "Gracie, this is Sam. Sam, this is my Gracie."

"Hi," Sam managed, staring wide eyed at the beautiful Gracie.

"Hi," she smiled, then hid behind Buel to peek out at Sam.

"And this is his sister, Eloise."

"El," I corrected quickly, trying to smile as everyone stared. "It's just El unless I'm in trouble. Hi."

"She's pretty," an older man told Colton with a grin, pushing his arm playfully. "Didn't think you'd ever settle! Finally found your type! Never imagined you'd go for someone so... delicate. Nice to meet you, El."

"We'll do full introductions in the morning," Buel interrupted. "Give them time to settle in and get some sleep, been a long day and she had a rough night last night. Rest is needed all around. Gracie, you save me a plate?"

"Course, papa! You'n Colt both! I can warm more for El and... my Sam."

"Get on to it then," Buel grinned, grabbing a crate of Sam's books.

Colton grabbed two heavy sacks of beans and I pulled up my own bag to follow him into the huge house.

The inside was lit up and I could see kids peeking out of rooms down two long halls.

"Alla ya back to bed!" Buel hollered. "We'll talk in the mornin'!"

The kids quickly disappeared, giggling.

I found myself smiling at the thought that the huge, gruff man was a big teddy bear and his grandkids weren't afraid of him.

Gracie was hurrying around the large kitchen, but she kept looking back at Sam, who was hovering next to the door, watching her in stunned silence. I knew he'd been afraid she wouldn't be that pretty, but she was stunning and he wasn't sure what to do with that.

Colton tugged my bag out of my hands. "You'll be sleeping back here," he told me softly. "Mal will get to saying the words over us eventually, till then you can just have my bed and I'll sleep somewhere else," he told me, opening a door. I went into the room and looked around at the large bed and the things in the room. It was clean and uncluttered. "See you in the morning," he mumbled, setting my bag next to the bed, then shut the door quickly, leaving me in the dark as I stared at the door with an open mouth.

That was it? I couldn't even talk to his family and socialize a little? Just shoved into a dark room and told to go to sleep?

Feeling my way to the bed, I had to jump up and climb in, kicking my shoes off as I sat on the edge. I could still hear people out there, talking and laughing and I felt left out. Alone.

Laying my head down, I pulled my feet up and curled up, then couldn't stop the tears that welled up. Was I doing the right thing? I was sure Sam had, I'd seen the way she looked at him, the way he looked at her. Colton hadn't looked at me like that... but Buel said that he'd picked me out of all the girls he'd seen? After all this time, he'd picked me? That meant something, didn't it? He was just quiet was all, and didn't know how to act around women. That was all.

The door opened slightly and a sliver of light fell across my face as I winced.

"Alright, are you?" Buel asked softly.

"Yessir. Buel. I'm fine... is... is he? Is he upset, or...?"

"No. He went on to bunk up out in the loft of the barn where it's quiet just now. He's not keen on people and noise is all. Get some sleep, little one. Tomorrow is a big day."

I nodded as he closed the door and it snicked shut. I didn't think I'd be able to sleep at all, but my body and mind were both exhausted.

Sunlight on my face made me open my eyes and I stared at the window on the opposite wall, the trees I could see past it. My dreams had all been bad and I lay there shaking slightly, feeling a little sick.

Henry was dead. He wouldn't be coming for me and I could breathe just fine. They were just dreams was all.

Getting up, I slipped my shoes on, then poked my head out. I could hear people again in the kitchen down the hall and I slipped down to peek out. The dining table was full to bursting with people, including kids and I could even see Sam sitting next to Gracie and grinning down at her as he talked to her. I didn't see Colton though, so I hesitated and wondered where I should sit.

"Hello!" a woman called from the kitchen and I turned to look at her as everyone looked at me.

"Come on in and have a seat," Buel told me, his frown almost angry. "This one here."

I sat in the seat he pointed to, climbing up, then folding a foot under me so the table wasn't so high up.

Buel refused to look at me, his face red. "Seems Colt woke up early," he told me, staring at his plate. "Left word with Michael that he'd be back in a few months, he went up to one of the trapping sheds."

"Oh..." I managed, my own face going bright red. "I see. Should... I... umm..."

"It's fine, he just hates the whole to-do of when we're all here and there's new family," a man spoke up. "He'll be back and we'll do the vows as soon as he is."

"What should I do in the meantime?" I asked softly, feeling sick to my stomach.

"Whatever you like," Buel answered quickly, his expression sour.

Why had he left? Did he not want me as a wife after all? Or was it really just that he didn't like being around so many people?

"Try to eat something?" a woman told me gently, her smile sweet. "You didn't stay up and eat last night, you need to eat something!"

I managed a smile and took a biscuit from the bowl she offered, but I felt so off here.

As soon as everyone sat down, the introductions started and I was immediately overwhelmed. I remembered Gail, but everyone else was a new face and there were so many of them!

It took more than a week before I felt confident enough to use names, hoping I wasn't getting them wrong. Especially the kids. I'd taken to getting up early and helping make breakfast, then took it on myself to gather up all the smaller kids and begin teaching them to read and their numbers as well. When I started doing that, some of the older kids were told to sit in and learn as well, and even a few of the older brothers and sisters sat in, including Gracie.

Nights were hardest on me, most nights I woke up crying and clutching the extra pillow, wishing I wasn't alone.

The second week, Sam came to me after lunch and before I started on math lessons. "You aren't sleeping?" he asked softly, trying to stay quiet enough that none of the dozen people talking near us could hear.

"Nightmares," I whispered. "And it's getting so cold! The bed is big and lonely and... not very warm. I feel so alone here, Sam? Should I go back home?"

"No! No, absolutely not! The kids all love learning from you and Gracie said the women all love that you pitch in and help and always have a smile. They all like you! I'm sure when Colt gets back and everythings all calmed down, things will be like they should. Ok?"

I nodded, but he knew I wasn't feeling any better about it. That night he slipped into my room and got into the huge bed with me, pushing his back to mine.