Eve & Lucy Ch. 02: Cast

"I'm going to, um, see if, um, Haile's ok," Keke says as he leaves us.

The door swings shut behind him.

"That was such a good ad lib though, Amanda," I manage, wiping my eyes.

"Well, like, it wasn't pee!" And she's off again giggling, her breasts jiggling with laughter, her luscious legs bending. "Ow, oh God, my stomach, like, it can't take anymore, you know?"

I put my arm around her and suddenly, it occurs to me that this gorgeous, naked girl I'm half hugging has spent large parts of the last 5 days with me. Working out, grabbing lunch, studying together in the library, rehearsing. All things I would have done anyway. Nothing has been an imposition; none of it has taken away the time I need to spend on others.

The desires I've shut away start to slip through the bars of their cage.

"So, like, so naughty," she slaps me on the side.

"Well, I am the devil," I say as I wrap her in a hug. "So..." I begin, but then Dev comes in, carrying our coffee orders.

He takes us in: Amanda, naked, tear tracks from laughing down her face; me, clothed, hugging her.

"Um... are you two ok?"

That of course sets us off giggling again, and we break apart.

"Yeah, yeah," I gasp.

"You just missed, like, the king of all cock ups Dev!"

I can't take it. I collapse onto a chair, literally holding my sides.

Dev stares at us, bemused.

"Sorry, like, we had it," Amanda snorts in laughter, "like in hand, you know..."

"Stop!" I gasp. My sides are aching now. I may wet myself.

"But then, like, it was all about to come apart..."

I'm heaving with laughter. This girl! This fucking girl! Oh my days!

"Right..." drawls Dev, "Um, so where are Haile and Keke?"

"Sorry, Dev, like, I know it sucks not being in on the joke, you know?" she wipes her eyes. "But we're not trying to stiff you." I'm still having aftershocks from the laughter, and this sets me off again, my laughter silent now. I can't breathe. I don't trust myself to speak. "Um, Haile... um, well, things got, like, intense, and he needed a break and then, you know, Keke went to check on him."

She pauses, looks at me. "They've been, like, a while now, right?"

I fight down a giggle.

"I mean, you don't, like, think they're...?"

"What?" asks Dev.

Amanda moves to the door and looks through the glass panel. I stand up, and still holding back the laughter. I can't remember the last time I laughed like this. Probably some time with the boys. Dev follows.

There's nobody in the corridor.

"Come on," Amanda whispers, beckoning to us.

We follow her down the corridor towards the boys' bathroom. I realise halfway there that she's still naked. We're on the top floor, so it's not like there will be a lot of foot traffic, but still. She motions us to a stop, outside the door and puts a finger to her lip to warn us to be silent. Dev goes round opposite us, and I find myself leaning in close to Amanda as she listens at the door. I'm hyper-aware of her nudity, the glow of her coffee-coloured skin, the moles that spot her shoulders, the kink of her hair, her smell, of sweat and body butter.

Then I become aware of something else. A rhythmic slapping noise. A grunting. Muffled sounds. Dev's mouth and eyes go wide as I share a look with him, and Amanda's bare shoulders start shaking next to me. Are they really....?

As if to answer my question, a loud "Uhhh... yeah!" comes from behind the door.

"Quick!" Amanda hisses, grabbing my hand and pulling me back to the rehearsal space. Dev follows, as our shock and embarrassment wells up and transforms into laughter that threatens to spill out of us. We scuffle in, trying to dam it in, but it bursts forth the moment the door swings shut behind us. Amanda's clutching my arm like a drowning swimmer as she sinks to the cold floor, heaving out great gouts of hilarity. My own eyes are streaming once again.

We're still giggling, sipping our coffee while perched on chairs, Amanda leaning on me, when Keke and Haile come back in. I can't look at them. I don't trust myself not to start laughing again.

"Don't say anything," I hiss at Amanda, who is silently shaking.

"Well, er, look everyone, I think we need to... um, we've done some good work today... er, I know it's early, but, well, um... let's call it for the day, ok? We'll be back on Thursday."

With that we break up. The boys are quick to go, but Amanda is still giggling away next to me.

I pull my phone out of my bag to switch it off silent and immediately notice I have 2 missed calls from Jean, Mum's sponsor from over an hour ago.

"Shit!" I jump to my feet, dialling.

"Everything ok?" Amanda's next to me, hand on my arm. I pace away from her as the phone rings in my ear.

"Jean! Is Mum ok?"

"Yeah... sort of..." There's loads of noise behind them and I hear a siren. My skin prickles.

"Where are you?"

"Um, A&E at the BRI, but..."

"I'll be there in 10." I hang up, grab my bag and bang through the door, Amanda following me.

"Is everything all right?" she asks.

"No, I gotta go. My Mum's at the hospital."

I'm thumbing the call button for the lift repeatedly. "Come on, come on, come on!"

"Oh My God! Like, do you want me to come with you?"

"What?"

"Like, for, like, moral support? You know, in case you need something?"

The lift pings. That was fast.

"No... why would you come?"

She follows me into the lift. There are two other students in there. Their mouths drop open when they see her. Because she's still naked. She doesn't bat an eyelid.

"Because, like, that's what friends do, you know?"

"No! Amanda, I don't need you. I've got this. It's my job." I'm almost shaking, scratching at the back of my hands. Come on, this lift is so slow. Half my mind is mentally rehearsing the fastest route to the BRI. No point getting the car - I'd never be able to park, and besides it's 3 streets away in the wrong direction.

"I'm not, like, saying you can't Carrie. I'm just, like, offering to be there for you," she places her hand gently on my arm.

"No!" I'm shouting now, "for fuck's sake Amanda, when will you get it! I don't need more people in my life to look after!" She backs away, stunned, her eyes brimming. I suddenly feel bad. I shrug off my jacket. "Here take this."

She shakes her head at me, crossing her arms. A tear springs free from the corner of her eye.

The lift shudders to a halt. As soon as the doors crack open, I'm slipping through, running, leaving her behind.

Single minded, I shove my way out the back of the Union and I sprint for the Triangle. I jink and dodge past shoppers and commuters, ignoring their outrage, but once I'm on Park Row I can power on, my heart racing as I pound the pavement. My Mum needs me. Visions of her lying there, her stomach being pumped, or haemorrhaging fill my mind.

I'm sweating, but not out of breath, and I grab the railings to kill my momentum, then jog between the sliding doors.

Jean intercepts me before I make it to the reception desk.

"Where is she? Did she relapse?"

"Georgie's fine, Carrie. Sorry to worry you."

"What happened?"

"She's broken her arm. They're putting a cast on it now. Your Gran is with her."

"What? Gran's here?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry I called you. I hadn't realised that your Gran was picking Georgie up and, well, Georgie was a bit distracted."

I slump into a spare seat and drop my head into my hands. "Don't sugar-coat it Jean; how drunk was she?"

"She wasn't! Stupid, yes, standing on a stack of chairs to try to change a lightbulb. But she wasn't drunk. Why do you think she would be?"

"I don't know." And, suddenly I realise I don't know.

"Carrie, it's been 5 years since your Mum had a drink. I know it's been tough for her seeing Bex again after all these years, but I don't think she's at risk of a relapse. I mean, no more than we all are. Don't you think?"

I shake my head. I always feel like Mum's on the brink of a relapse. It's a constant worry, sitting under my skin, burning beneath the surface, and that panic has just burst from me in the past few minutes. Dashing here channelled it, but now I'm sitting here it has no outlet and just spills from me and I sob into my hands.

Jean strokes my back. "God Carrie, has this been preying on you? You need to trust her. You can't carry her; you've got to live your own life, and you can't if the weight of this is on your shoulders."

I don't say anything. We sit there in silence for a bit.

"Look, I hate to leave you like this, but I need to get back to the meeting. I've got to lock up."

"Oh yeah, sure, go, go."

"You know, you could go too, Carrie. Your Gran will take Georgie home."

"No, no, I'll wait. Thanks Jean."

"Don't thank me. I should never have let her get up there." She gives me a long hard look. "Stop mothering your mother Carrie. Be young."

With that she goes. It's all very well for her to say that, but I can't. I just can't. The very thought makes me itch and shiver.

* * *

"What are you doing here Carrie?" Gran's voice cuts through my reverie. I blink and take her in, plus Mum, who is sporting a bright green cast on her left arm.

"Jean called me. How are you Mum?"

"In pain, and also feeling very stupid. This is going to make work tricky. Sorry you got dragged down here."

"Don't be sorry..."

"Well I am, I didn't want to worry you. I hope you aren't missing rehearsal?"

I get a sudden flash of Amanda, naked and crying, in the lift. I've fucked up.

"How long have you been waiting?" Gran asks.

"I don't know. What time is it?"

"It's nearly 11."

Shit! I've been here for over two hours.

"Gran, are you ok, to get Mum home? I need to go..."

"Well, shall we give you a lift?" Gran offers.

"No, thanks, I'll get there just as fast."

"No, Carrie, come with us." I can tell from Gran's tone she means business. I suppose it won't make a difference.

It takes 15 minutes to get up to Gran's mini, pay the parking and drop me outside Amanda's flat. Mum's painkillers must be kicking in, as she actually grins at me as I climb out. "I'm so glad for you Carrie," she says.

"We're just friends Mum." Maybe not that anymore.

I try calling Amanda. No answer. I try again. Straight to voicemail. I press the buzzer to her flat. It takes a while before anyone answers.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's Carrie? Is Amanda there?"

There's silence. I buzz again. Wait. Pull out my phone and redial Amanda's number. I'm just about to type a message when the door opens.

"What the fuck did you do Carrie?!"

This curly haired girl is up in my face, flushed with anger. Lit by the street lamp, she looks vaguely familiar. One of Amanda's flatmates I'm guessing.

"Errr..." I start to answer but don't get a chance.

"Amanda was crying her eyes out earlier! What the fuck did you do?" she hisses at me.

"I had to run off; my Mum broke her arm."

She delfates a little. "Sorry to hear that. But why was Amanda so upset?"

"Didn't she say?"

"No." She crosses her arms and glares at me. "She wouldn't say anything when she got in. Just sobbed and sobbed until she eventually fell asleep." Her anger comes back and she almost spits at me, "What. The. FUCK. Did. You. DO?!"

I step back. She's a fair bit smaller than me, but I'm not about to risk her swinging at me and it looks like she happily would, given the slightest excuse.

"I snapped at her, said something I shouldn't. I've come to apologise. Can I? Please?"

She stares at me, considering.

"No. I'm not waking her up. She's physically and emotionally exhausted. She doesn't need this. Apologise at the next rehearsal."

She turns to the door and I go to follow.

"Please..." I begin.

"No." She hisses at me. "Stop fucking with Amanda, Carrie. Now go away."

The door shuts on me.

I pull out my phone. Ok, so she's asleep. No point calling again. Before I can overthink it, I message her:

I'm so, so sorry Amanda. I was a bitch. You didn't deserve that. I came to apologise, but your flatmate wouldn't let me in. I hope I can see you tomorrow to apologise in person. Carrie

* * *

It's a miserable morning, blustery, the wind whipping up the drizzle and soaking my legs under my coat. Regardless, I wait outside the gym for an hour hoping she'll turn up.

She doesn't.

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Thanks for reading! There's more to come. I'll try not to keep you waiting.