by athena_by_night
I don´t like it that you switch all the time from the 3 person into 1 person, it is disturbing and adds no excitement whatsoever! Get yourself an editor if you are unsure who to work with the grammar.
Being I'm into a little bdsm, I truly enjoyed this chapter deeply. The scenes were acutely sharp. Your word usage it extremely good, Marie.
Marianna is a very fiery woman. Sharp as a tack and intricately woven with desires and a vast array of emotions. I love this woman. She would make me a very happy Master indeed.
Keep writing! The story is so arousing, so sexy. The only criticism is refering to herself in the 3rd person, then the 1st person.
...and I would be caught breathless at the turn of every page. I'm really enjoying this story. Of course you already knew I would. lol Keep it up...don't stop now