Forever is a Strong Word

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"Shorts, Mom! Want to wear shorts!"

"It's too cold this morning for shorts. Maybe after lunch."

"No." Hands on hips and a rebellious look on her face, Mikaela was making her feelings very clear.

"How about this? Wear your leotard and shorts over the top."

"Okay," a grumpy voice said with reluctance.

Finally dressed, the two headed for the car and the picnic.

Bryan and Tanny parked in different areas of the parking lot, but when the two little ones spotted each other, they ran to meet, Mikaela stumbling and falling on the way. Bart was quick to help her up, and the run to the shelter house continued.

Bryan waved. "Race you to the house," he shouted

In her exercise pants and joggers, Tanny thought it might be fun. She took off running, praying she didn't follow Mikaela's example. She glanced at Bryan, who was jogging along, Obviously not too intent on winning the race. And in front of them, at the shelter house, stood a giggling Darla.

"Glad to see you guys here," she said to the panting pair. "The others will be here soon. You two never get to see them since they arrive a little earlier each morning. Um, Cindy Bronson is the brunette, and Angel Westerford is the blond. I think you'll get along well with both of them.

Darla updated Bryan and Tanny regarding Bart and Mikaela, both of whom we're doing well. Both parents told Darla that the progress could easily be seen at home.

The other four arrived almost together, and introductions were completed.

"So you're the father of that handsome boy I see when I pick up Melissa. I see where he gets it," she added with an overly friendly smile.

"Nice to meet you," Bryan replied politely.

"Talk to you later," Angel said, another sexy smile aimed at Bryan.

Cindy was much more demure, shyly smiling and shaking both their hands.

When they had drifted away to talk with Darla, Bryan turned to Tanny.

"You must have been invisible to Angel."

Tanny shrugged, then chuckled. "I think she has her eye on you."

"Oh, please."

Darla called them together to watch a typical activity she did with the kids. Then came the picnic lunch. There were sandwiches, jello, potato salad, fruit, and an assortment of drinks. There were also chips and more drinks for later.

Next came the nature trail, the parents trailing along behind, watching the show and tell where Darla was able to weave a story involving all the interesting things along the path. Cindy and Angel were totally involved with watching Darla and the little ones while Bryan and Tanny had dropped a little behind.

"So, what kind of work do you do, Tanny?"

"Well, I pass out food, clothes, tents, and sleeping bags. Plus, I help people handle their money," she answered, chuckling at the puzzled look on Bryan's face.

"Okay," he said, laughing. "Would you like to explain that to me?"

"I volunteer at the Wharton Center, which is a homeless shelter...without the sheltering. We have no sleeping facilities, although, if it gets cold, we turn it into a warming center."

"So, you volunteer?"

Tanny knew that Bryan wondered how a single mom could be a volunteer.

"When my husband, Terry, was killed, the insurance settlement was very substantial. So, I volunteer and save the Center from having to pay a salary and benefits."

"Wow, that's amazing. I don't think I've run into that before. Have you ever considered a kind of home-preschool?"

"No, I haven't, and it's kind of a way to honor my husband. Terry was huge on education. He'd had the privilege of attending some good schools, and when Mikaela was born, he could hardly wait to start an education fund. I might enjoy being her teacher, but I want her to have the best, for both their sakes."

"Good for you for sticking to it. I think Darla is about as good as you can find. She engages the kids so well."

"I know. I love Mikaela like...like..."

"I can imagine," he said, nodding and putting a hand on her shoulder. "Go on."

"So I volunteer at the Center where I'm doing what I know how to do. And I leave her to Darla during the day. In the evening, we play games, and I read stories--at least the first part of the story, and Mikaela finishes them for me. she has a good memory."

"I try to do the same," Bryan said, a defeated look crossing his face. "But my phone is constantly ringing, which takes up time. Plus, I love football, and basketball, and just about any other sport as well."

"What's Paula able to do?"

"Hell if I know. We hardly even speak."

"I'm sorry."

"Me too. I thought I loved her. But when she found she was pregnant with Bart, everything changed."

"You mean she didn't want Bart?" Tanny wanted to bite her tongue after she'd asked that. It was personal and none of her business.

But Bryan didn't hesitate to reply.

"No, she didn't, and that's why I've never understood why she insisted on joint custody."

"Have you asked her about it?"

Bryan looked at her like she'd suddenly grown horns.

A long look from Bryan. "No. We don't talk."

"I'm sorry. That was way too forward of me." Tanny's cheeks were very pink.

"Don't be silly," Bryan said. "Darla got us together today so the adults could talk a little."

"About the kids, I think," she replied, "not such personal things."

"I didn't hear her put any limits on the talk," Bryan said with a laugh. "Plus, somehow, I find you very easy to talk with."

Tanny smiled. "Same with you. We've had very different experiences in our lives, but they've left us in similar positions. Funny how life works sometimes."

"My divorce was bad enough, but I can't imagine going through what you went through with losing your husband that way. I mean, you tell him goodbye, like you do every day, but then he doesn't come home."

Tanny's vision blurred a little as she remembered that day. It had taken many days before the realization that Terry wouldn't be coming home again had become a reality. She knew it would never be totally gone as, even today, she'd thought about telling him how much Mikaela seemed to be enjoying the nature walk with Darla.

When Tanny looked at him, Bryan could sense what was happening inside of her.

"Sorry," he said again. "I need to learn when to keep my mouth closed."

"No, no," Tanny said, trying to assure him. "I think these thoughts every day, and a few tears aren't unusual. Perhaps someday, it will get less intense, but it hasn't yet."

"So your husband was a pilot for a private organization?" He thought that Tanny might enjoy sharing some more positive memories of Terry.

"Yes, for Carrigan Building and Industries."

"No kidding?" Bryan's face took on an animated look. "I'm a structural engineer, and I've done work with them on some of their building projects." He paused, looking intently at Tanny. "I've flown on their company plane at least three times. Do you suppose?"

"They have two planes and two pilots. Terry and Sam both flew for them."

"I'm sure you have a photo."

Tanny dug in the fanny pack she was wearing and pulled out her wallet. Quickly Bryan was staring at a photograph. He turned his head slowly.

"I'm ninety-nine percent positive I flew with him at least once."

Tanny could only stare at the photo and then at Bryan.

"I never got to talk to him, but I was sitting in a seat where I could watch him doing his pilot things. This is kind of bizarre, Tanny."

"I know. It's that small world thing one more time."

Before anything more could be said, the other two mothers appeared.

"Hey, what are you two up to, hanging out back here?" Angel said, a smiling leer on her face.

Tanny was sure her cheeks were getting pink as she had certainly enjoyed talking with Bryan, even though there was nothing amiss in what they were doing.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Bryan said, giving it right back to her.

Cindy's face nearly matched Tanny's.

"That Darla is amazing. She's holding the attention of four three-year-olds, and it's been for thirty minutes. I couldn't do that in a million years." Angel seemed to be letting go of the suggestive talk, but she was unabashedly speaking directly to Bryan.

"I guess that's why we all have our little ones in her preschool. I'm amazed at some of the things mine says and does when he comes home after school." He said that last directly to Cindy, obviously trying to include her in the conversation.

"I know. It is amazing."

Cindy didn't seem to be an adept conversationalist, her apparent shyness holding her back.

But Darla was approaching with the four little ones in tow. Melissa and Janet ran to their mothers while Mikaela and Bart, hand in hand, approached Tanny and Bryan.

"They've just attached themselves to each other. It was none of my doing," Darla added. "Whenever we walk somewhere during the day, they hold hands and walk together. It's kind of fun for me to watch."

Bryan and Tanny glanced at each other and smiled. Hands had been released and exchanged for Mom and Dad's hands as they walked back to where they had eaten.

Darla had snacks and more drinks, all that followed by trips to the restroom.

A couple more games, a thankyou from Darla for everyone's participation, and they headed for home.

On Monday, Tanny delivered Mikaela to the school only to meet Bart and Paula coming up the walk. Two squeals as the little ones ran to each other.

"I'm Paula," the pretty blonde said, extending her hand.

"Mikaela," she replied as they shook hands.

"I assume you've met Bryan."

"Yes, I have. A very pleasant fellow. "

Paula shrugged. "I see our two youngsters seem to know each other. "

"Yes. Darla says they hold hands when they walk together. "

"That's great," Paula replied. "Bart needs that because there's certainly no one his age where I live nor among any of my friends. I'm glad he's getting it here."

Tanny's mind was in high gear now, trying to merge the picture of Paula that Bryan had presented, the I don't want any children, and I'm divorcing you for getting me pregnant with the lady so concerned that her son is socializing with other kids his age. Could Paula have changed that much?

"Kind of the same for me. There are a couple of little ones where I live, but we've never gotten together to figure out play times or anything like that."

Paula appeared to be doing some thinking while her eyes held Tanny's.

"Maybe we could get our two together sometime when I have Bart. It would give them a little more creative playtime."

Creative playtime? Tanny had never thought of it that way. But Paula obviously had. Another piece added to the puzzle.

They met twice more that week at Darla's, but nothing more was said about the play date. Tanny was leaving it up to Paula since she still wasn't sure she understood Bart's mother. Or maybe she didn't understand the Paula that Bryan had described.

Tanny was anxious for Monday and hoped she'd run into Bryan, planning to just mention that she'd talked with Paula. And that's what happened.

"What was your impression of her after talking with her?"

Ugh. Did he want her to confirm what he'd said before about Paula, or was he really interested in what she thought? After that thought had passed through her head, a second one followed quickly. Why was she concerned about that? That question jarred her a little.

"She seemed pleasant and concerned about Bart. She even suggested we might get Bart and Mikaela together for some playtime when he's with her."

"Wow, that's sure not the Paula I remember."

Tanny let her breath out, not aware that she had been holding it waiting for Bryan's answer.

"They do get along well, don't they? It would be a little more awkward, but we could do that too."

"You mean the neighbors might talk?" Tanny said that before she thought, then waited for Bryan's response.

"I think you could have them talking," he answered, winking at her.

Tanny wished her cheeks didn't pink quite so easily. But they did, and they were.

It brought a chuckle from Bryan. "I hope you don't mind my saying it, but the pink cheeks look good on you."

Of course, that simply increased the pinkness.

"you're cruel," Tanny said, laughing as she covered her face with her hands.

"I'm sorry," Bryan said, "sort of." He glanced at his watch. "Gotta run. Don't take me too seriously," he said over his shoulder as he jogged away down the walk.

Tanny wondered what part of what Bryan had said she wasn't to take seriously. Some of it her ego actually enjoyed. He was a fun guy to be around. But it was off to the Center and a day of being helpful.

It was Wednesday before they arrived at Darla's at the same time again. Tanny felt a little jolt as she saw Bryan.

"I promise to be good today," he said.

"You're always good, Daddy."

"Thanks, Bart, I try to be."

"He's a good guy, Bart." Tanny affirmed.

That seemed to settle things, and the two little ones headed inside.

"Want to try it?" he said.

"Try what?" Tany asked, looking surprised.

"The playdate. Hell with the neighbors."

Tanny burst out laughing. "You really want to try that?"

"Sure. The kids would love it, and I think we can find plenty to talk about."

Tanny hadn't really taken Bryan seriously when he'd mentioned it on Monday, but now it was up to her to decide. What were the implications if she went to Bryan's or if he came to her apartment? Did there have to be implications? It was simply a playdate for two kids who enjoyed being together.

"Okay," she answered a little tentatively.

"It's okay if you don't think it's a good idea," he assured her.

Tanny took a deep breath. "Hell with the neighbors."

Great!" Bryan exclaimed with a lot of enthusiasm for a simple playdate. "Where do you live?"

So it was her neighbors who'd be wondering.

"Laurel Canyon. I always call it an apartment, but it's really a condo."

"Lots of nice places in Laurel Canyon."

"Terry bought it when we were married, and it was plenty big for the three of us. He had mortgage insurance, so it was paid off when he was killed."

"I'm in Kensington Woods, and Bart and I have a nice little three-bedroom place."

"Well," Tanny said, "if it's hell with your neighbors, we'd better do it at your house."

Her neighbors would be spared the questioning.

"If we go for Saturday, then I'll have a few days to clean."

"You don't need to do that, Bryan. I enjoy lived in."

"Am I allowed to straighten up, at least?"

Tanny was about to backtrack when she decided to match him.

"You're allowed to straighten up moderately, but not so much that I can't sense the real Bryan."

He bowed his head slightly. "As you wish, madame."

"Oh, cut it out," she giggled. "You know what I mean. You don't need to impress me."

Bryan's shrug after her comment sent a mixed message. Was he saying she was right or was he saying he did need to impress her? Variations of that latter thought had been tugging at her since Monday, and she still wasn't sure.

"I don't particularly enjoy cleaning, so I'll take it easy, okay."

"Okay," she echoed. "We haven't said anything about a time."

"Bart still likes to take an afternoon nap."

"Same for Mikaela. How about ten o'clock, then?"

"Ten's good for me."

"I need your address, then" She carefully copied the address into her phone, and they separated once more, Bryan heading to work and Tanny to the Center.

Bryan had arrived early on both Thursday and Friday, so they missed connections. Evening pickup times were a little different as well. They hadn't exchanged cell numbers, so there was no way to confirm Saturday, even though both of them were sure it wasn't needed.

Saturday morning came, and Mikaela was dressed and ready, her excitement palpable. Tanny stood in her walk-in closet, trying to decide what to wear. It was a playdate for two three-year-olds. Why was what she wore so important? Perhaps it was just her vanity, always wanting to look good. She had always had that, so today wasn't that different. Was it?

Some cute shorts--how short?--a simple top and some sandals would fit the bill. How short. She had Bermuda shorts and some daisy dukes as well, nice and ragged along the bottom of the legs. That seemed casual. She was sure she'd look adorable with those and a snug tank top.

But what if she was too adorable and, heaven forbid, Bryan asked her for a date? She was sure that Bryan had felt betrayed by what Paula had done, while she had been totally destroyed by Terry's death, even though it was two years ago now. By some of his actions and what he said, Bryan indicated he might be ready to jump back into the relationship scene, while Tanny was sure she wasn't ready yet...if ever.

Maybe she'd compromise with the daisy dukes but a sleeveless blouse rather than the tank top. She didn't want to give the wrong impression.

Five minutes before ten, her GPS noted, you have reached your destination, and she pulled into the driveway of a very pretty home with a rather spacious yard. As she stepped out of the car and began releasing Mikaela from her car seat, Bryan stepped onto the front porch.

"Whoa. If the neighbors want to talk, you give them something to talk about." He laughed.

With pink cheeks, she said, "This is how I dress at home."

"Can't resist teasing you...and seeing the pink cheeks."

"Is it going to be that way all day?" Tanny asked as Mikaela ran to the door where Bart's head had just appeared.

"No guarantees, but come on in. I've got some games set up for the kids."

Bryan held the door while Tanny went inside. Glancing around quickly, she could see the house was nicely furnished and a little larger than she had imagined from outside.

The kids were already in the family room, and Bart was showing Mikaela his favorite game.

"I haven't seen one like that," Tanny said, leaning over and watching Bart work on the game.

"I made it. I'll make one for Mikaela."

The game was a puzzle, the pieces geometric shapes that were painted different colors. The puzzle board had the shape outlines painted the same color as the matching piece. Bart was doing his best to impress Mikaela as he was placing the pieces correctly, one after the other.

"Your turn," Bart said when he had finished the puzzle. He dumped the pieces out and turned them all face up.

Mikaela picked up the first piece and looked puzzled. A little fumbled, and she put it into place to praise from the adults. A second piece, and she had figured it out, just matching the colors. A huge smile when she finished.

A couple more games and then to the backyard and a game of tag. Lots of laughing, and when Bryan was it, he made a beeline for Tanny. She had been a bit of an athlete in high school, playing both volleyball and basketball. She was quick and certainly surprised Bryan. Lots of laughing and giggling from all four, and it was time for lunch.

Lunch was another fun time with laughing and teasing. But two three-year-olds were very tired and went down for their nap in Bryan's bed.

Back in the family room, Tanny said, "So you made that game with the colored pieces."

"Yeah. Don't let me forget to make a similar one for Mikaela."

"How do you make them?"

Bryan stood. "Come along, and I'll show you." He led her to the basement and his workshop.

"I don't know a thing about any of these tools, Neither my father nor Terry had anything like this."

"I guess the engineer in me enjoys it. I'll show you a couple of tables that I made."

"You have lots of surprises, don't you?"

"You may be surprised at my surprises."

They headed upstairs, and Bryan's brain was whirring. He'd put out a tiny bit of bait, but Tanny hadn't responded. He knew her relationship experience was almost the exact opposite of his. He found her to be fascinating despite there being nothing romantic between them...yet. Her dark hair, deep dimples, and those often rose-colored cheeks. Her figure, much more clearly seen today, raised his fascination to a new level.